As if Luke planned it perfectly, he strolls through the door just as Noah’s setting down his pen and moving to stand. When he notices Luke, he lowers back into his seat and watches again.
“Hey. You look beautiful,” Luke says, taking me in a hug that’s not uncomfortable, but doesn’t give me the same feelings as when Noah touches me.
“Thanks. You clean up nice, too. Where are we going?”
“There’s a restaurant a few blocks away. It’s a nice night, if you’d like to walk with me.”
“Absolutely,” I answer, a little too enthusiastically, but I need Noah to hear my voice. As we walk out the door, we pass by Noah’s table and his growl is noticeable, but I pretend like I don’t hear it.
It’s not ten minutes later that my phone begins ringing. Checking the screen, Noah’s number flashes as an incoming call. Pressing ignore, I continue my evening with Luke. He’s going on about something football-related. I couldn’t care less, so I smile and act like I’m listening. A few seconds later, my text notification goes off.
Noah: WTF are you doing?
“I’m sorry, I have to answer it. My cousin is at a party and I promised to be available if she needs me for anything,” I lie.
“No problem.” His smile is endearing, and honest, even. I almost feel bad about using him as Noah bait. Luke seems like the exact kind of guy I would date if I had my head on straight. Maybe after all of this is over I’ll be able to give him a real chance. It’s times like this that I question my own sanity. Remembering it’s all for Karly, I have a little bit of peace, but not much.
Me: I’m on a date. Can I help you with something?
Noah: That guy is a tool. I’ve heard rumors. He’s no good, Zara.
Me: I’m not sure who I date is any of your business.
I glance up at Luke and start to get a little nervous. I never thought he would end up being a Boy Scout, but I don’t take warnings from Noah lightly. Yes, he’s jealous of me spending time with Luke, but I don’t think he’d lie about my safety.
Noah: Please text me when you get home so I know you’re safe.
Me: If I go home…I’ll text you.
Noah: Zara…
Me: Good night, Noah. I know I’ll have one.
I quickly power my phone off before he has a chance to respond. The rest of my night with Luke goes without incident. He is even gentlemanly enough to walk me back to my car parked at the student union. I won’t lie and say he didn’t try to kiss me, but I turned my face at the right moment. When his lips touched my skin, I didn’t feel those butterflies I do with Noah—I kind of felt dirty.
“We’ll have to do this again soon,” he says, opening my car door for me.
“Yeah,” I say through my teeth and smile. He’s a nice-enough guy, but leading him on doesn’t feel right. I hope another beautiful coed will catch his attention and he’ll forget all about little old me.
Walking through the front door, the apartment is empty…again. Tossing all my stuff on the dining room table, I walk back to the bedroom and quickly disrobe. After I slip into a sleep shirt and shorts, I grab my phone from the nightstand and text Noah.
Me: Home.
Noah: Safe?
Me: Maybe.
Noah: Thanks.
Chapter 14
Noah
All was quiet today in class. Zara didn’t make any attempts to talk to me, which made everything a little easier. Granted, it’s still pretty difficult to watch her walk past my desk and smile as she chats with Luke.
Luke is a fairly good student, but I know guys like him. He might as well be Lance’s younger, more perverted twin brother. All the kid does is rant about what girl he’s fucked and who he’s going to fuck next. His latest conversations have included Zara’s name. And she’s playing into his hands. How can she be so stupid?
“Ms. Hamilton. Can I see you after class today?” I ask, needing to tell her more about this fucker who’s getting her attention.
Instead of answering my question, she and Luke continue talking. No doubt making plans for him to fuck her in the backseat of his car. Not on my watch. Especially with the relationship she has with her boyfriend, he’s not the kind of guy she needs to be involved with.
“Ms. Hamilton,” I say again, with more authority. Her head twists toward me—along with half the room. She has a smile on her lips. A fucking smile. He’s making her happy. Fuck. This isn’t like me. I can’t have these kinds of emotions.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Bain. What’s up?” she asks, without any emotion.
“Can I see you after class today?”
“Can we discuss whatever it is you want to talk about tomorrow during your office hours? I have to leave right after you dismiss.”
“That’s fine,” I respond, not wanting to let her leave with him. I’m going to go insane thinking about what they’re doing out of my sight. Fuck. The date they shared two nights before was bad, but this is torture. She’s not even heeding my warning. How can she seem so intelligent one day and then act like a typical college student the next?
I end today’s lecture and dismiss everyone early. I’m going to rid myself of these false feelings I have for Zara one way or another. I think I might have a way to do it. It’s not going to be the greatest decision I’ve ever made, but I hope it will be better for all parties involved. Especially Shannon.
While my students are finishing their assignments before the end of class, I step into the hall and make an appointment with the jeweler in town, so I don’t procrastinate when I leave work.
—
Stepping into the high-end store, I search the display cases for something that screams Shannon, but nothing is popping out at me. An elderly man comes from the back and motions for me to meet him at the case he’s standing in front of.
“I think I have just the thing,” he says with his raspy, smoked-for-forty-years voice, reminding me of my late grandfather. A sense of calm settles over me as I look down to where he’s pointing, and he’s right—it’s perfect.
I don’t know much about rings, but this is beautiful. Not too big, not too small, just right. “It’s amazing. Can I see it?”
The man nods, uses the keys on his belt loop to open the glass, and pulls out the diamond ring set in a platinum band. My father told me once that if the woman is meant for you, put the ring on your pinkie finger and that’s the size of her ring finger, so I do just that. The band effortlessly slides down my pinkie and catches the light from the bulbs above.
“I’ll take it,” I say, not taking my eyes off the ring. I’m not sure if I’ll ever know if Shannon is the only woman out there for me, but I’ve been with her so long, this seems like the next logical step.
Paying more money than I had anticipated for my purchase, I take the small velvet box and place it in the front pocket of my slacks. I make it back to my apartment quicker than I ever have before. Taking the steps two at a time, I shove my key into the lock and push open the door. I hope I’ll have a little time before Shannon gets back from her meeting with a student she’s going to mentor and I can whip up a nice meal.
Pulling two steaks from the fridge, I place them in a sizzling-hot skillet, searing them on all sides, then pop them in the oven to finish cooking. While they’re going, I change into a nicer, fresher pair of pants and a button-down shirt, pull out the beautiful lace tablecloth her grandmother gave her before she passed away, and set up our dining room table—complete with candles and place settings. I only wish I had stopped to pick up some fresh flowers.
Just as I’m pulling the steaks from the oven and plating them alongside some steamed broccoli, the doorknob turns and creaks open. I quickly set the plates on the table and stand off to the side.
“In here, honey,” I call, letting her know to come right into the dining room.
When she rounds the corner, I hear her voice and that of another person. All the hairs stand up on my neck and sweat appears on my brow. I know that voice. I’d recognize it anywhere.
/> “Noah, I’d like you to meet the student I’ll be mentoring this semester. She’s only a junior and hasn’t taken any classes in fashion, but her counselor said she’d be an excellent fit for the program, provided she changes her major.” Just then, the combat boots sneak around the corner and Zara’s standing in my dining room with my soon-to-be fiancée.
“Zara, this is my boyfriend, Noah. Noah, this is Zara.”
Chapter 15
Zara
“Hey, Noah.” I smile. “Lovely to meet you.”
It’s becoming rather difficult to break through to him the way I was planning to. Yeah, sure, he wants me, but he’s not doing anything about it. It’s making me question everything I’ve started. The only way I’m going to know for sure what happened with him and Karly is to get to know him on a more personal level. Yes, I want him to suffer for what he did to her, but more than that, I want the truth. All this second-guessing myself has to stop one way or another.
“I’ll get us a drink,” announces Shannon, pointing at the sofa. “Sit down. Are you cooking something?” she asks Noah. From the tone of her voice, I’m guessing he doesn’t cook much.
“Dinner,” he mumbles. His face reddens. I walk over to the sofa and sit down, crossing one leg over the other. He paces the room as Shannon disappears. As soon as she’s out of earshot, he turns to me.
“What the hell are you doing?” he growls.
I blink innocently. “I had no idea she was your girlfriend,” I lie. “It’s a great opportunity. Of course I was going to say yes.” I wet my lips and smirk at him.
The fact that he’s nervous, like he doesn’t want Shannon to know about me, lets me know that Shannon isn’t going to know anything about Karly, either. I’m going to have to find another way to the truth.
Shannon bounces back into the room juggling three cans of soda before he can respond. I smile and accept a can, popping the top open.
“I invited Zara for dinner, is that okay? I wanted to show her some of my old assignment pieces.”
“Yeah, sure,” he mutters. Shannon ignores his obvious foul mood and starts talking fashion to me. I’m half listening and half watching Noah fight his own conscience.
“…I think it’s in the spare bedroom. Give me a sec.” She jumps to her feet and runs out of the room.
I stand up and walk toward him, knowing I have a good few minutes before Shannon comes back.
“You can’t stay here.” His voice is strained as he holds his arms out, preventing me from getting any closer. “God, Zara, what the fuck are you doing?”
“I’m giving you what I know you want,” I whisper. I push his hands away too easily. If he really doesn’t want this he would be putting up more of a fight. I reach up, my hands snaking around his neck.
Leaning into him, placing my mouth just outside his ear, I whisper, “It’s a shame. I really like Shannon. If you ever call it quits with her, you just let me know.”
“You shouldn’t be here,” he snarls, affected by me being so close, yet, in a way, appalled that I’ve invaded his home. Even though I’ve been here before, his mood’s not the same. As he pushes my shoulders back, forcing me away from him, he glances up at me, almost apologetic. I know the feeling. This would have all been a lot easier had I not had any conversation with Shannon. Karly deserves justice, but hurting another person, another woman, in the process seems cruel.
I step away as Shannon walks back into the room. Her arms are full of clothing and scrapbooks. She dumps them on the floor and sits down, oblivious to the tension between Noah and I. Noah steps out of the room while Shannon and I go through her books. She’s good. I mean, she’s really good. The dresses she’s designed—I can’t understand why she’s mentoring college students and doesn’t have some kind of fancy boutique in the city. If I ever wanted to get married, I’d want her to design my dress.
“Shannon, these are wonderful. You really should do something with this. You have a talent not many people have,” I tell her, honestly.
“I’ve wanted to for a long time, but life kind of got a hold of me. Never really got back into it. Figure, as long as I have the talent, I should at least share it with someone, you know?”
“Makes sense. You could really be something, though. When my cousin Amanda got married a few years ago, I was a bridesmaid, and I would have loved to wear one of these and not what she picked. Hell, she had a Vera dress and yours are even more beautiful than that.” Shannon blushes, pushing aside one book to open another, when Noah rounds the corner.
“I think I might head to the gym,” he mutters.
I’m sure he just wants to get out of the apartment and away from me. I really should apologize to him for this. I knew what I was doing, but all of it feels wrong. And for me to see that it’s wrong, it has to be really, really wrong.
“I should get going, too. I have classes pretty early. Would you like me to call a cab?” I ask Shannon.
“I’ll give you a ride, that’s not a problem. Thanks for coming over and looking at these designs. It’s been so long since I brought them out, I feel rejuvenated, in a way.”
“Great. It was nice meeting you, Noah.” He gives me a sideways glance before he grabs a bag from the closet and flies out the door without a second thought.
—
Shannon and I leave shortly after, chatting about dresses and fashion the entire drive back to my apartment. She really is a nice woman, but I don’t see a connection between her and Noah. She didn’t even comment on the setup he had made for her. If I noticed that the dining room was clean, the apartment smelled of a wonderful dinner, and he was wearing different clothes than he wore in class today, how didn’t she? Trouble in paradise?
Shannon parks just in front of my building, showing me her schedule for future mentoring dates. I tell her I’ll shoot her an email to confirm once I check the times I have available between school and work. Realizing it’s been a week or so since I’ve checked the mailbox, I cross the parking lot just as Shannon’s car pulls out of sight. Opening the box, I grab the few letters and sale ads and make my way to the door, flipping through a magazine.
“What the hell was that, Zara?” Noah asks, as I approach the front door. Stopping just before I collide with him, I stare up into his light blue eyes, shocked.
“I really had no idea. I’m sorry,” I answer, partially honestly. I knew exactly what I was doing, yet I’m still sorry I did it.
“I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing, but it has to stop.”
“You know what, Noah? You should go. I’m sorry that you think I’m playing a game. I’m sorry that me having a crush on my teacher is a little too much for you to handle.” Too many conflicting emotions have taken their toll on me today. All this switching from being angry and hurt to apologetic and pathetic. I’m over it. All of it.
“Shit. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I just don’t know what to do here, Zara. I just don’t know.”
“What do you want to do, Noah?” I ask, exasperated, wishing he would just go and let me wallow in my own misery for a little while.
“I’d like to talk for a little bit. Just talk. I said friends, but that’s all. I was your friend the other night. Do you think you could be mine for a moment?” He’s caught me off guard, and I’m not exactly sure how to answer.
“Sure.”
“I almost made the biggest mistake of my life tonight. Before you and Shannon got to the apartment.” Not understanding what he’s talking about, I think of something that a friend would do.
“Can I interest you in a drink?” I ask. He hesitates, but nods. “Dillon won’t be home for a while.”
“Your boyfriend,” he states, matter-of-factly.
“Uh-huh. Just like Shannon is your girlfriend. We’re friends, right? We should be able to hang out,” I say lightly.
I walk up the path to the front door. I unlock the door and hold it open for him. He walks in, and I follow.
“Straight ahead and then to y
our left.” I direct him to my unit, then make a quick job of unlocking that door.
We enter the kitchen and I put the coffeemaker on. He stands at the end of the counter, his palms firmly laid out on it as he watches me. I pull down two cups.
“Black or light?” I ask, because it seems as though his coffee preference goes along with his mood. When he drank it black outside the theater, he wanted me. Then in the diner he added cream and sugar, and he was pushing me away.
“Black.” He smiles and I reciprocate. Exactly what I was worried he’d say.
I raise my eyebrows and brace myself. If he wants me and I have him alone, I have to act on it. If I don’t, I’ll only kick myself in the ass for it and regret not doing something. I rack my brain, trying to think of what I can do to stir the pot, but I can’t lie and say I’m not nervous that moving forward will only confuse my feelings for him even more than they already are.
“So, tell me, how long have you been interested in fashion design? You’ve never mentioned it before.” His lips curve up into a smirk.
“You mean in the couple of months that you’ve known me?”
“Fair point. It’s a big coincidence, though. Isn’t it?”
“Is it? Dillon saw something about it in the admin building and told me I should apply. How the hell would I know she’s your girlfriend?” I slide his coffee across the counter and walk around to meet him.
He breathes in sharply as I duck under his arm, immersing myself in the space between him and the counter. His arms twitch as my gaze lifts to meet his.
“If I recall correctly,” I begin, narrowing my eyes, “you are the one with the stalker tendencies, or have you forgotten about your little alarm incident?” He flushes, and now it’s my turn to smirk.
I rest my hands on the edge of the counter and hoist myself up, parting my legs enough that if he wants to step between them, he has no obstacles in his way. I’m more than shocked when he takes a step in my direction.
Breaking Noah Page 10