by Jodi Thomas
Tinch nodded. “I don’t want the boy to ever know that.”
She agreed.
“And.” He lowered his voice. “I’m dealing with the funeral home in cash, so there will be no paper trail to me if they check. Tyler said he’d write it down as a county burial, if it’s okay with you.”
“Fine. Is the doc staying here with you?”
“She is until I get security at her place. You got a problem with that, Sheriff?”
He caught her smile in the porch light.
“No problem at all. In fact, that’s the only good news I’ve heard today.” Alex straightened her tall, slender frame. “I’m only thinking of her safety, of course.”
“That and the boy are the only reasons she’s here,” he said, more roughly than he’d intended. He wasn’t any better at lying than the sheriff was.
When he walked back inside, he found Addison upstairs, curled up next to Jamie. Tinch had no way of knowing if the boy had cried out or if the doctor thought this might be the best place to hide.
He pulled off his boots and slipped in on the other side of Jamie.
Addison’s arm circled above the kid.
Tinch turned out the light and reached for her hand. He didn’t say a word as he gripped her fingers in his. She didn’t pull away, and Tinch fell asleep wondering why he hadn’t settled for a nice sweet kiss when she’d asked him. The way she’d kissed him would flavor his dreams for a long while.
The answer as to why, he refused to acknowledge, but it kept circling in his mind. He hadn’t settled for less because he wanted more. Much more.
Chapter 24
TUESDAY
OCTOBER 4
TURNER RANCH
ADDISON WOKE UP LATER THAN USUAL. JAMIE WAS STILL asleep beside her, but Tinch was already gone.
She showered and put her clothes back on, knowing she could get a clean pair of scrubs when she got to the hospital.
Then she rushed downstairs, planning to dart to her car and hopefully not see Tinch at all this morning. After the fool she’d made of herself last night, she needed time to think about what to say to him. First she’d asked for the kiss, then she’d attacked him. She’d wrapped her legs around him so tightly he couldn’t have gotten away if he’d wanted to.
Apparently, he hadn’t wanted to, since he’d kissed her like he was a dying man and she was his last breath.
She made it to the porch before she saw him walking across the yard, a bridle over one shoulder and his hat low against the morning sun. For a few moments, Addison was unable to look away. There was something so beautiful in the rough strength of this man. This man, she remembered, who handled a rifle last night as easily as he’d handled her.
“Morning,” he said when he noticed her.
“I have to go,” Addison said. She didn’t move. If she headed toward her car, she’d have to pass him, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to be that close to him. Not yet. Her nerves were still too raw. Just thinking about how she’d acted made her blush.
“About last night,” he started as he faced her straight on.
“Forget about last night.” She couldn’t, wouldn’t talk about how she’d acted. “It never should have happened. I owe you an apology. I was wrong about saying you were wild. Apparently, I’m the wild one. It was bold of me to ask for a kiss and then attack you. My behavior was appalling.”
Tinch pushed his hat back and stared at her as if he were trying to converse with an alien. “I was thinking about holding your hand while we slept. It was nice.”
“Oh.” She felt as if she’d just been sunburned from the inside out. “I forgot about that.”
A slow smile dimpled one of Tinch’s cheeks. “And about the other. You didn’t attack me, Addison. I was there and I remember every detail that happened. If anything, it was me who got out of line, not you.”
“Thanks for that.” She’d expected him to deny what had happened or brag about it. Maybe even tell her that she was some kind of nut job. That seemed to be the usual plan of action with men she’d had dealings with, but then she’d never met anyone like this cowboy before her.
“It was nice.” He moved a step closer. “I’m sorry if I frightened you.”
“You didn’t frighten me.” She could feel herself shifting from foot to foot and moving her arms. Her father’s voice echoed from childhood, demanding she stop fidgeting. “Can we talk about this later? I have to go to work.”
He stepped away from the porch, giving her plenty of room. “We don’t have to talk about it at all, Doc.” He raised his hat a few inches and then settled it back low on his head. “You have a good day.”
She almost ran to her car. Part of her wanted to say she wouldn’t be back tonight. She didn’t know what she was doing here anyway. Jamie had settled in and Tinch could take good care of him. She should just go home and call to check on the boy. But Addison couldn’t stay away. She cared about Jamie and wanted to help him, but she knew down deep inside that she was coming back to see Tinch, not the boy.
As she drove the ten miles to the hospital she couldn’t stop thinking about the way he’d held her. To her surprise, she realized the man had been giving, not taking. He’d been pleasing her, something that no one had ever done before.
She had a slow day, with time to catch up on paperwork and even take a nap in the break room. Georgia Veasey told Addison she looked tired and asked if she was feeling all right.
Addison couldn’t tell the nurse, her good friend, anything. Even if she’d wanted to and it had been safe, she had no idea how to explain what was happening between her and the neighbor just down the road.
How did she explain that for the first time she wanted someone for no other reason than she needed him?
About five the emergency room was empty. Addison called Tinch to tell him she’d bring supper, and then she changed into jeans and a sweater and left the hospital.
Thirty minutes later, when she walked into Tinch’s house, Jamie ran toward her. “Food,” he shouted. “I’m starving. Uncle Tinch let me ride a horse by myself today and we rode for miles and miles.”
Addison smiled, realizing she’d been waiting all day to get back to this place. “How about we eat and then you can teach me to play Chinese checkers?”
Tinch pulled a soda from the refrigerator. “I’m glad you’re here. I’ve got a few hours’ work to do with a horse I got in today, if you don’t mind staying with Jamie. I’d rather he not be around this mare just yet.”
“She’s mean,” Jamie said between stuffing French fries in his mouth.
“No,” Tinch corrected. “She’s hurt. The vet stitched her up, but I need to change the bandage and she’s not too happy about having anyone close.”
“Of course I’ll stay with Jamie.” Until that moment, she hadn’t thought about how hard it must be on him to get his work done and watch over a four-year-old.
“Thanks,” he said, then leaned over and kissed her cheek.
Before she could react, he was out the door and Jamie started asking her questions about which food was his.
As they ate, Jamie told her about his day. “We cleaned out a closet today and boxed up a bunch of clothes.” As he tried to feed the kitten lettuce, he added, “We also picked which room is going to be mine. Tinch says I can put my things in there, but I don’t have to sleep in it until I’m ready. He says its okay to sleep with you and him.”
“You know, Jamie, my house is down the road. At some point, I need to go back home.”
“I know”—Jamie looked like he might cry—“but not tonight.”
“Not tonight, but soon.”
Jamie nodded. “Tinch says one of the pups can sleep in my room when I decide it’s time for me to bunk in there. He says when they’re grown they’ll be the best guard dogs around. No one will step foot in our house without them barking.”
“You and Tinch talk a lot today?”
“Sure, we talk all the time, and you know what?”
“Wh
at?”
“He never tells me to stop talking or be quiet like my mom always did. He lets me ask as many questions as I want to, but he says for me to remember the answers ’cause there ain’t enough time in this world to answer them twice.”
Addison laughed. She could almost hear Tinch saying those exact words.
“I told him my momma always called me a bother. You know what Tinch said?”
Addison couldn’t wait. “What?”
“He says it don’t matter what folks call you, it’s what you answer to that’s important.” Jamie frowned. “I don’t got no idea what he means, but it made me feel better.”
At nine Addison put Jamie to bed and stayed with him until he fell asleep. When she heard Tinch banging around downstairs, she climbed from the bed, slipped on his old shirt that she used as a robe, and tiptoed down to join him.
He was sitting at the bar downing a cold sandwich and a glass of milk. For a moment she thought he looked exhausted and wondered if all the worry over Jamie had taken its toll.
He must have heard her coming, for he straightened and looked toward the stairs. His hat was propped far back on his head, as if he hadn’t quite realized he was finally inside, and his shirt and jeans were so dirty he must have wrestled the horse.
“Mind if I join you?” she asked.
“Only if you promise not to ask any questions.”
“Deal.”
She climbed onto the stool across from him and propped her elbows on the bar. “I could warm that up for you.” She pointed to the steak sandwich that had once been hot. “Though it’s still not much worth eating.”
“No thanks.” He tossed his cold supper back on his plate. “I wasn’t that hungry anyway. It’s been a long day. A vet over in Clifton Creek brought over a half-wild Appaloosa mare who got into a roll of old barbed wire. She was cut all the way to the belly.”
“I could look at her.” Addison couldn’t believe she was offering to treat a horse.
He shook his head. “It’s too dangerous. The cuts have been sewn and treated. If they don’t get infected, they’ll heal.” He stood and reached for a beer. “I’m in for the night.”
“You want to talk about what happened between us last night?”
His blue eyes met hers. “Not really. Not if you’re going to tell me it never should have happened again.”
“It probably shouldn’t have,” she admitted, “but I’m not sorry it did. I just want you to know that what happened wasn’t me. Not the real me. I’m not like that.” She stared down at her hands. “I’ve never been like that before with anyone.”
“Like what?”
“You know, wild, reckless, passionate, demanding.” She glanced up at him and was surprised to see him smiling. “It’s not funny, Tinch. I’m not sure, even if you’d tried, I would have let you go.” She closed her eyes, remembering the way she’d wrapped not only her arms but her legs around him.
“Are you trying to say that you took advantage of me?” A laugh rattled from his tired body.
“I’ve had all day to think about it, and I’ve decided that’s about it. But I want you to know I’ve never acted so wild, and I promise it won’t happen again. I still respect you.”
He spewed beer across the floor as he fought down another laugh. “You’re something, Doc. Really something. I can’t believe you think I’ve been worried all day about the way you took advantage of me last night. If the alarm hadn’t chimed, there’s no telling what you would have made me do.”
Addison stared at him. She couldn’t tell if he was serious or if he was teasing her. “That’s why I think it best if we just be friends and try to get through this like reasonable adults.”
“I agree,” he said. “I wouldn’t want you losing control again. Who knows what you’d do to me?”
“Exactly.” She jumped off the stool. “Well, now that that’s settled, I suggest we go to bed.”
“Darlin’, I thought you’d never ask.”
He followed her up the stairs. “I’d better take a shower and change into some fresh clothes; otherwise you’ll be smelling dirt all night.”
“You don’t have to sleep in your clothes. Now that we’ve reached an agreement, there is no reason we can’t be comfortable with each other. Why don’t you sleep in whatever you usually do?”
“I usually don’t sleep in anything,” he answered. “But how about we compromise. Since you’re sleeping in my shirt, I’ll settle for a pair of old jeans.”
Fifteen minutes later when he came to bed, Addison tried to act like she didn’t notice all he had on was a pair of tight jeans. There was so much about him she didn’t understand. He was so gentle with Jamie and the horses, and her, but she’d met him the night he’d taken on five men in a fight. He lived all alone in a house big enough to hold a family. He made her feel like a woman.
When he rolled over, she could tell he was watching her even in the pale moonlight.
“What?” she whispered as she noticed his frown.
“I want to touch you,” he said simply. “I’m not going to, but that doesn’t stop the need I have. I just want you to know. We can play this game of being friends for as long as you like, but that doesn’t change the ache I have in me to pull you near and run my hand over you.”
She said the first thing that crossed her mind. “You’ve just been without a woman for a while. Having Jamie here must slow your dating life down.”
“I don’t have a dating life,” he corrected. “And I’m not wanting any woman, Doc, I want to hold you.”
No man had ever been so direct. Tinch wasn’t flirting or playing mind games. He was simply being honest, and that frightened her.
“It’s not happening,” she whispered. “We’re not happening.”
She rolled over, turning her back to him. Part of her knew that he was just being honest. She also knew he wouldn’t cross the line she’d drawn without being invited. The problem was, Addison felt like she was going slowly insane, and she had little faith that she wouldn’t jump over every line the next time they were alone.
Chapter 25
WEDNESDAY
OCTOBER 5
BEAU WATCHED THE BAR FILL UP FOR THE SECOND TIME on a practice night. Even the half dozen nurses were back.
“Now, try to be cool tonight, partner,” Border told him. “My brother said he talked Harley into unlocking the cage and letting us go say hello between sets. It’s a pretty big deal. Harley’s going to announce the bar is closed while we greet our fans.”
“What fans?” Beau had noticed them listening, but he doubted the drunks wanted to talk to him. “I wouldn’t mind seeing a few of the nurses up close, but I don’t think anyone else will want to meet me.”
Border kicked his chair. “Okay, go out and meet the nurses. But, remember, when we do, be nice. My brother says the tall one is kind of a friend of his.”
“What’s her name?”
“Big didn’t know. He forgot to ask her. I guess that’s where the ‘kind of’ comes in.”
Beau didn’t want to know more. He decided he should probably stay in the cage at break time. He’d get nervous and just stutter anyway, or worse, look at their breasts. Martha Q had made it plain if he didn’t stop thinking about breasts he’d be moved to the pervert line pretty soon.
Beau thought about writing a song about how it felt to touch a woman’s breasts, but he figured only half of the crowd would like it. As he played through the next set, he tried to apply logic. Women liked showing their breasts off. They were always pushing them out there or leaning over so a guy could get a good look. Men liked the feel of them, so it made sense people should just give up shaking hands and start touching breasts as a greeting. It would make the world a lot friendlier place.
Almost choking, Beau thought about what his father would say if he suggested such a thing. To his knowledge his dad had never even said the word breast.
When the break came, Harley announced the bar was closed for ten minutes and op
ened the cage. To Beau’s surprise, people rushed forward to shake his hand. He didn’t have to say a word as one after the other they all said how much they liked his music.
Border was at his side and thanked each one.
After a few minutes the crowd died down and Beau came face-to-face with one of the nurses. He’d noticed her before when she danced.
“Hi,” she said. “The other band member told me to bring you this. He said you were always dying of thirst after a few songs.”
She shoved a soft drink in his hand. “I like listening to you play. Some of your songs made me want to cry. I think we all feel that kind of lonely sometimes. You’ve got a way of saying things that touches me.”
Beau didn’t trust himself to say a word. She was being nice to him, thinking he was something. He didn’t want to start stuttering and have her realize he was nothing special.
“I also like to dance to your music.”
He forced his eyes wide open as he stared at her forehead. He didn’t even trust himself to blink for fear he’d start staring at her breasts. She had short blond hair and a nice smooth forehead.
“The girls and I decided we’d come over every week when you play. You’re the best entertainment going in this town. Even Harley knows it.”
Beau nodded, then gulped down half the drink.
“You got songs I’ve never heard before. Songs that make people want to cuddle up close and sway with the music. Do you make them up?”
He managed another nod.
“Maybe some night after you’re finished, if you want to, we could …”
Beau handed her back the empty glass and shot toward the cage door Harley was holding open. He felt like some kind of caged monkey who’d been given a moment of freedom and couldn’t wait to get back into captivity. Another minute with that girl and he’d be staring where he shouldn’t or stuttering so hard he’d sounded like a stuck record.
He could hear Border behind him talking to the girl about how they had to get back to work, but Beau didn’t look up. He concentrated on setting up his equipment and organizing his notes.