But would he let me?
When we had made love, I had handed him my heart and my soul. They belonged to him now, whether there were ten feet separating us or a thousand miles. He did more for me than any human being had ever been able to do, and I was so happy that I could do something for him too. I was the one girl he felt somewhat safe loving. How could he send me away for forever?
God, I hoped he wouldn’t.
At least if he wouldn’t let me stay, he had to promise I could come back. Soon. Very soon.
I sat in my room, staring at my packed suitcases. Every piece of clothing Kace had bought for me was in there. Everything but one little item. A blood red ribbon, the one Adela had given me that first day. That, I’d tied around my wrist.
Adela stood at the door, silent, watching me with kind, patient eyes.
“This is all so insane,” I told her. “Even thinking about staying in a foreign land with a man I just met is crazy. If someone had told me this would happen two weeks ago I would have laughed in their face.”
“Sometimes life takes an unexpected turn,” Adela said.
“Yes, you can say that again.” I looked down at the ribbon on my wrist. For some strange reason, that little scrap had come to mean so much to me over the past few days. Whereas the first time I’d seen it, it had represented my imprisonment, loss of freedom, now it represented a lot of things. Blood and pain. Guilt and redemption. And desire…and love. And I had decided I would wear it every day I was apart from Kace. “I can’t believe everything that’s happened. I’ve learned so much about myself. I’ve made peace with my past. And all because of him, because of Kace.”
Adela said, “You have given him a great gift too.”
A happy sigh surged up my throat. “I hope I have.”
“There is no doubt.”
I pinched the slick satin between my fingers, feeling its cool, smooth surface. “Is it crazy that I think I’ve fallen in love? In a week?”
Adela shook her head. “No, Miss Tremaine.”
“This can’t be anything less than love,” I said to her and to myself. “What else could it be? It isn’t only lust. It isn’t mere infatuation. No, it has to be love. True love.”
“Yes. Love,” Adela agreed. “A very beautiful love.”
Love. It was love. I wasn’t crazy.
It had really happened. Just like in my stories. I’d always hoped it could happen to me like that. But I’d always thought that was impossible. Stories were fantasy. Real love didn’t work that way.
But it did. It really did!
God, I was terrified Kace would throw it away.
Outside my closed door I heard footsteps. Slow, even. A steady tap, tap, tap on the stone floor. Coming closer, closer. My doorknob rattled then turned. My heart did a triple flip in my chest. I gave Adela a scared look.
The door opened.
Kace.
Adela merely smiled and left the room, closing the door behind her, sealing us in.
My eyes locked on Kace’s. I tried to read his expression but I couldn’t.
Please, please don’t say goodbye forever. Say, “see you soon.”
Dark purple smudges under his eyes told me he’d been up all night.
“Kace,” I said, loving how his name felt in my mouth. I could say his name a million times a day and I would never get tired of speaking it, hearing it.
“Are you ready to go?” he asked, his voice hoarse, as if he’d spent the night screaming at the top of his lungs.
I crossed my arms over my chest and shook my head. “No.”
His brows lifted. “No?”
“I don’t want to leave.” I ran to him, standing close. I had to be near him. I had to touch him. Looping my arms around his neck I said, “If I could, I would stay here with you. For weeks or longer. Months. I want to be your lover, your friend, your esclavo.”
He grabbed my hands, gently pulling them down. “No, Kendall. You cannot stay.”
My heart lurched. “But I think this is where I belong.” He couldn’t send me home so soon. Not after what he’d shown me, taught me. I’d finally found someone I could connect with on every level. Heart. Body. Soul. To even think about never seeing him again…oh, God. I wouldn’t. I couldn’t. Tears started dripping from my eyes.
“No, esclavo.” His palm cupped my cheek, thumb smearing a tear as it dribbled down to my jaw. “You belong where you are safe. Where you are loved.”
I set my hand on his. Did he not see what I saw? Did he not know that he could love, completely, honestly. “I could be loved. Here. By you.”
“No, Kendall.” His gaze drilled into mine. “I cannot love you. I told you. I am broken. My soul is empty. There is no room in my heart for love. I only take. I only destroy.”
“Dammit, what makes you say these things? Who told you this? It’s not true. You can love. You do love. You love more thoroughly and selflessly and completely than anyone I know. You have not destroyed me. Look.” I extended my arms. “You see? I’m whole. I’m alive. I’m happy. Here. With you.”
He stepped past me, staring toward the French doors. “You ask for something you don’t want. You will regret if you stay. I promise you.”
“That was what you said before. And I came back. And I don’t regret it. I know--”
“You will regret it.” Spinning around, he met my gaze again. His expression was full of emotion, determination, regret. “We talked about this. It was one week only. And because I care too much for you to let you make a bigger mistake with me, I am keeping to our agreement. Go home. Find a good man. A man who will not be hungry for blood…” His gaze dropped to the floor. Softly, he added, “A man who doesn’t dream of hearing your screams of pain.”
Stooping down I put my face in his line of sight. He had to see my eyes, to know I was telling the truth. “Kace, those screams were cries of ecstasy. Do you see this?” I lifted my hand, showing him the ribbon. “This is a symbol of every gift you’ve given me. Peace. Redemption. Passion…love. I will never take it off. Never.”
He grasped my face in his hands and glared into my eyes. But I stood firm, my heart sure, my breathing steady. I had never felt more certain about anything as I did this. Kace Ramos could be my perfect match. If he would not at least consider the possibility, to give this thing we’d started a chance to grow, he would most certainly regret it. We both would.
“Kace,” I said as I looked into his eyes. I saw his soul. It was beaten and broken, but it was there. And it called to me. “Your mind is telling you to let me go. I know that. But your soul is crying for mine. If you send me away now, you will destroy yourself.”
“Better to break myself than you,” he whispered.
“You won’t break me. I know it.” I set my hands on top of his. “You were so sure you would break me by now. Do you remember? You promised me at the very beginning of the week that you would break me before the week was up. You didn’t. You can’t.”
“As time goes on, it will get worse.”
“I’m not afraid.” I placed my hand on his chest, feeling the racing thump-thump of his heart beneath it. “Because you care about me. Your instinct to protect will kick in. It’s there. It has before.”
His eyes reddened. There was so much pain inside him. So much torment. “The darkness is stronger.”
“No, it isn’t. Not when I’m with you. Let me teach you what it’s like to walk in the light. Just as you’ve taught me. Please, you can’t tear away all the precious gifts you’ve given me now.”
His eyes turned watery, as he glanced down at my wrist and at the red ribbon, tied in a bow. And I knew I’d won the battle. As much as he pushed me away, he wanted me more. He longed for connection, companionship…love. Just like any human being did. He was more man than monster. I knew both. The monster. The man. The darkness and the light.
“I’m staying,” I told him.
He smashed his mouth against mine, his kiss telling me exactly what I’d been aching to hear. He w
ould not let me go. He could not. And when he’d just about kissed me into a coma, he broke the kiss and smiled, hands pressed to either side of my head. “Kendall. My Kendall. My light. My salvation.”
“Yes. I’m yours. And you are mine. Apart we’re lost in the darkness. But together we will make our own light.”
“I want to love you,” he said. “More than I thought I could. I care for you so much it tears me up inside. I’m just…afraid. Afraid of failing you.”
“Just let yourself love me, Kace. And you won’t be able to fail me.” I tipped my head up, offering my lips to him again. And as his mouth sealed over mine, I whispered, “I will let myself love you too, Kace Ramos. You are my prince charming. My master. And my redeemer.”
Sometimes only you have the answer. Only you can make things right. Only you can see the truth. Let me tell you, it takes guts to take that kind of risk. But I had to. I was done watching my best friend punish herself for something she had no control over. Nobody should live that way, buried under so much guilt and regret.
And so, I did it. I took the risk of a lifetime. I brokered her sale. To a man who would make her cry in agony and moan in ecstasy. A man who would drag her back into the world of the living. A man who needed her as much as she needed him.
Either she would hate me for it. Or she would be grateful.
Turned out, she did both. Fortunately, she loves me too much not to forgive me. My boss, on the other hand...well, let’s just say it’s time for a career change and leave it at that. –Sidonie M
The End
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*****
Please turn the page for a special sneak preview of SURRENDER.
For fans of Sylvia Day’s CROSSFIRE series, a story of dark lust and decadent pleasure.
SURRENDER by New York Times Bestselling author Tawny Taylor
Kensington
Coming May, 2014
I was his.
To touch.
Anywhere.
Any time he wanted.
Abby is ready to agree to anything to stop her brother from going to prison, but Kameron Maldondo, the owner of MalTech Corporation, is asking for the unexpected. Enthralled by his commanding brilliance, she agrees to be his assistant, at his beck and call for whatever he needs--whenever and however he wants. What that means is for him to decide and for her to submit to. Frightened yet fascinated by what he promises, Abby becomes a willing captive to his caress, undone by his peerless touch, a quivering submission to an aching need for complete carnal surrender. . .
SAMPLE (unedited)
Chapter 1
I closed my eyes. I pulled in a long, deep breath. I exhaled. My mind was racing, images flashing behind my eyelids.
Those eyes.
The sharp blade of a nose.
The chiseled jaw.
Those lips.
Those lips.
My heart was pounding. Hard. I felt a little dizzy.
I hadn’t even talked to him yet. How would I ever convince him not to throw my baby brother in jail?
Pull it together girl.
Twenty-three. Twenty. Three. That was how many times I’d heard Joss say, “Abby, I’m in trouble. Big trouble,” since our father died. Twenty-freaking-three times too many.
If it wasn’t for the fact that I knew Joss could pull through this crap and get himself together, I wouldn’t have bothered stepping in to drag him out of one scrape after another. But I did. Because, despite his long, difficult struggle with addiction, Joss was a good person. He didn’t go out of his way looking for trouble. Trouble seemed to always come looking for him.
And this time there might not be anything I could do about it.
Breathe.
If Kameron Maldonado, owner of MalTech Corporation, decided to report my brother’s alleged crime to the police, he could end up in jail. For years.
My brother. A felon.
Breathe.
My brother. In prison.
Breathe.
The only family I had left, gone.
Breathe.
My sweating palms were sticking to the leather couch. I dragged them down my thighs. My scratchy polyester skirt wasn’t going to dry them. But I did it anyway. When I heard the door to my right rattle a little, my heart skipped a beat. I jerked my head, glancing at it then at the young woman sitting behind the reception desk directly in front of me. She was staring at a computer screen.
I glanced at my watch. Twelve, twenty-five. I’d been sitting here for almost a half hour. My appointment had been at twelve.
God, this was torture.
The doorknob rattled again, and once more panic charged through my body. My head spun. The door swung open, and my breath caught in my throat.
Kameron Maldonado stepped out, moving out of the doorway. He was smiling over his shoulder, at the man behind him. “We’ll get together later this week to talk about the details. Thanks.” Kameron extended a hand, and the man shook it.
The visitor returned Kameron’s thank you and then, as he passed me, gave me a fleeting look before waving goodbye to the receptionist.
I turned my attention back to Kameron. He was standing next to the door, looking at me.
“Abigail Barnes?” he asked.
I nodded, stood on wobbly legs that felt boneless and heavy. Not expecting a handshake, but preparing for one anyway, I dragged my palms down my legs again as I shuffled toward his office.
After a quick, formal introduction and a brief handshake, Kameron closed his door behind me, circled his desk and stood, waiting for me to sit in the chair facing him.
My stomach twisted.
Of all the situations Joss had put himself in, this was by far the worst. Not only had he put his job in jeopardy, but mine too. Somehow I had to convince this man not to fire us both.
I sat, back straight, body stiff, heart thumping so hard I could hear it.
“How can I help you, Mrs. Barnes?”
“Miss,” I corrected. My mouth was dry. I licked my lips, but that did nothing to help. My tongue was as dry as the Sahara.
He nodded, “Miss Barnes.”
“I’m here on the behalf of Joss Barnes. My brother.” A huge lump of something coagulated in my throat. I tried to swallow it. It didn’t budge. I tried again.
Kameron’s brows lifted. “Are you all right, Miss Barnes?”
Swallowing a third time, I nodded.
He stood, strolled to the cabinet recessed into the wall behind me and opened a door. Within a second, he was standing over me, a cold bottle of water in his hand.
I accepted with a weak “Thank you,” unscrewed the cap and sipped.
“Better?” he asked as he leaned back against his desk.
I nodded.
Looming over me, he crossed his thick arms. God, he was big. Intimidating. Extremely intimidating.
“Your brother is in serious trouble, Miss Barnes. If what I heard is true, he not only violated more than one clause of his employment contract, but also broke the law. I was told he stole company property and sold it. I can’t let that go with a warning.”
We were so screwed.
Feeling utterly defeated, I nodded. “I understand.” My nose was starting to burn. Dammit. This was just too much. It was all too much. Our father’s death. Mom’s disappearance. And my brother’s rebellion and addiction. I was a fighter. I was a survivor. If I hadn’t been, my brother and I wouldn’t be where we were today. But I was too young to deal with this much crap. Every time things started to turn around, something new would come up and drag me right back down into the gutter.
When would life stop kicking me around? When?
My hands were shaking as I lifted them to drag my thumbs under my eyelashes. My eyes were burning now too. A sob was sitting in the pit of my stomach, but I was holding it in. Holding my breath.
I needed to get out of there. I couldn’t cry in front of this man. No. Nonono. I stood too fast and felt myself stumble. He caught me, fists clamped around my upper arms. Our gazes locked.
Something really strange happened. A crazy, unexpected bolt of electricity charged through my body. I heard myself gasp.
His eyes widened slightly. “Don’t go.” He gently forced me back into the chair. “I haven’t finished yet.”
What was there left to say? Was there any chance he was going to help me?
Afraid to hope anything decent could come out of this mess, I nodded and waited.
He released me, stared down, arms crossed over his chest once again. “Your brother has put me in a hell of a position.”
“Is there anything I can do?” I asked, my voice cracking.
His eyes narrowed slightly. He tipped his head to the right. “Why? Why are you so willing to put your neck on the line for him?”
What kind of silly question was that? “He’s my brother.”
“But he just about got you thrown out of here. You understand that, don’t you?”
Just about?
Just about!
I wasn’t fired yet.
“Yes, sir. I do,” I said, screwing and unscrewing the cap on the water bottle I clasped in my hand. “If my brother was a complete lost cause, I wouldn’t have bothered trying to help him. I would’ve let you fire him. Hell, I would have stood by and watched him be arrested, too. But I can’t. Because I know there’s more to this situation than you and I know. He’s not a bad guy. Sure, he’s hit a bump or two lately. He’ll get it figured out.”
“Maybe you’re right. Maybe there is more to this situation than we know. But, say he is guilty, what do I do with him until I figure out what really happened?”
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