by Jane Kindred
“It’s Carter Hanson Hamilton.”
“Carter?” Phoebe opened the door, relieved to see him holding up Puddleglum in his carrier—glaring out at her as if he’d been much misused and had given up wailing about it. She hadn’t really expected Rafe to send the lawyer over with the cat, and certainly not so quickly.
“Puddleglum.” She unlocked the screen door and let Carter in to take the carrier from him. “I was afraid he’d be lost in that great big house. Thank you so much for bringing him by.” Since she’d already locked up the cat door in the kitchen, she set the carrier in the entryway and released him. Offended, Puddleglum made a low dash for her bedroom.
Phoebe gave Carter a grateful smile as she straightened. “Would you like something to drink? I’ve got lemonade and sparkling water.”
Carter shrugged amiably. “I just wanted to see your little friend home safely, but now that you’ve said it, lemonade sounds really good.”
Phoebe went to the kitchen to get him a glass. “I suppose Rafe told you how the cat ended up there.” She tried to keep the heat out of her face.
Carter followed her through the sunken living room, pausing on the other side of the breakfast bar. “He mentioned something about the emergency vet being closer to his place and the late hour. I was happy to help him out, considering how difficult it’s going to be for him to deal with the public right now.”
Phoebe brought him the lemonade. “Because of his father, you mean.”
“That.” Carter took a sip with an appreciative nod. “And the bombshell that hit the news stations this morning.”
“What bombshell?”
“As his lawyer, I can’t comment on the story, of course, but since it’s all over the news, I suppose there’s no harm in my telling you what’s been reported. The police department has an anonymous source claiming Barbara Fisher’s business with Rafael was of a more personal nature than just a psychic reading.”
“Personal?” Phoebe’s inner I-told-you-so cuckoo was going off like crazy.
“Ms. Fisher’s main business was apparently soliciting.” Carter drank the rest of his lemonade. “The media loves a sex scandal. So much more interesting than a mere murder.” He handed back the empty glass, his expression thoughtful as he studied her. “The vet wasn’t anywhere close to Rafael’s place, was it?”
Phoebe sighed. “Not exactly, no.”
“It’s none of my business, so feel free to tell me to take a hike, but completely aside from any of these rumors or the case—I’d be careful around Rafael.”
Phoebe tried not to stiffen visibly. “What do you mean?”
“I only know him through his father and the Covent, though from what I’ve seen, he’s a thoughtful practitioner and a trustworthy man. I’d stake my reputation on his innocence with regard to the charges against him. But Rafael has some mental health issues I’m not sure you’re aware of.” Carter brushed a hand through his hair in a sign of discomfort with the topic. “I wouldn’t presume to give him an armchair diagnosis. I’m not an expert. But his father spoke to me about Rafael’s history at some length. He’s exhibited signs of paranoia and delusions since he was a boy. There’s a history of mental illness on his mother’s side.”
“I see.” The same had been said of her throughout her childhood, culminating in the “exile” to the parochial boarding school.
“I hope you don’t think I’ve been out of line.” Carter smiled apologetically. “Maybe I have. It’s really none of my business. I’m just looking out for you. And him. I suppose I feel a bit protective of Rafael.”
Phoebe couldn’t help but smile at the sincerity in his expression. “Don’t worry about it. I appreciate you letting me know. And bringing Puddleglum home.”
* * *
She contemplated Carter’s words after he’d gone, toying with the idea of calling Ione to find out what she knew about Rafe. That, of course, would be inviting a lecture. The fact that she was almost willing to endure Ione’s criticism meant Rafe had really gotten under her skin. Of course he had. He’d been inside her. Cobwebs and all.
The phone rang while she pondered the idea, jangling Phoebe’s already raw nerves. Terrific. Having the stupid idea had conjured Ione herself. Phoebe chewed her bottom lip. She didn’t want to deal with her older sister right now, but she couldn’t avoid talking to Ione forever.
“Ione.”
A brief, stunned silence followed. “Phoebe... I didn’t expect you to pick up. Have you seen the news this morning?”
She kept her voice neutral. “About Diamante’s relationship with Barbara Fisher? Yeah, I heard.”
“No, not...” Ione wasn’t usually at a loss for words. “Turn on the TV. Channel 3. Now.”
Irritated at her tone, Phoebe picked up the remote and punched the button. “Okay. It’s on. What’s so—?” The phone slipped out of her hand and Phoebe’s mouth dropped open. Her picture was on the screen next to a suited talking head. She turned up the sound.
“...identified the mystery woman seen leaving Diamante’s house early this morning. Carlisle is an assistant public defender for Yavapai County, who sources say was initially part of the Sedona business owner’s defense team.”
Frame-in-frame footage rolled of Phoebe doing the walk of shame to her car before the studio camera panned to a smirking female co-anchor. “Looks like she’s switched to a little one-on-one consultation, Bob. A user on Reddit shared this even more revealing video. We can only show you a partial image.”
Phoebe’s stomach sank as a shaky zoom-lens image showed her through Rafe’s window. Fuzzy pixelation covered most of her torso—and Rafe’s head.
“Phoebe?” Ione’s anxious voice carried from the couch cushion where the phone had slid. Phoebe scrambled for it as she muted the television. “Are you there?”
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“You’re not a public figure. They can’t show that.” Phoebe wouldn’t have expected those to be the first words out of Ione’s mouth.
“Rafe is a public figure. He’s a murder suspect and the son of a state senator.”
“Doesn’t matter. The shot outside the house is one thing, but the other video is a clear violation of privacy. They had to be on private property with special surveillance equipment to get it. I’m texting Carter Hamilton your number. He’s representing Rafe. He’ll get this yanked, at least from the legitimate news sources.”
“I sort of expected a big ‘I told you so’ from you.”
“Well, I did tell you so, but you’re an adult. You can sleep with whomever you want. Doesn’t mean you deserve to have film of it broadcast around the globe.”
“Thanks. I think.”
“And, frankly, after seeing that clip, I’m actually a little jealous, even if he is a bit of a hot mess. But I’m sorry it’s blown up in your face.”
Phoebe laughed. She couldn’t remember the last time that had happened in conversation with Ione. “Don’t be too jealous. It’s never happening again. He’s even more of a hot mess than you know.”
“Sorry, Phoebes. But you’re okay?”
“I think so. As okay as I can be. For now.”
Phoebe cringed as the censored video showed on the screen once more. Her phone beeped, announcing another call. It was bound to be a busy day.
“That’s Theia calling. I’d better take it. But...thanks, Ione.” She clicked over to the incoming call, accepting Theia’s FaceTime request. “Theia.”
“Wow, honey. When you clear out the cobwebs, you do not mess around.”
“Yeah, I figured why not go big?”
Theia’s twin, Rhea, darted into the frame in front of her. “How big?”
Phoebe shook her head. “God, you’re the worst.”
“Somebody has to keep your ego in check now that you’re famous.”
&n
bsp; Phoebe snorted. “I think the media’s got that job covered.”
Rhea’s expression turned serious. “You know if you need moral support, we’re there.”
“Summer session finals just finished,” Theia added from behind her.
“So we’re just hanging out in Flag Town.”
“We can be there in an hour.”
Phoebe was starting to lose track of who was who. “Don’t jump in the car just yet. I think I can handle it. And Ione just offered me moral support, actually.”
Rhea’s blond, scruffy pixie cut popped back into the frame. “I thought you two weren’t speaking.”
“Yeah, so did I. Weird, huh? Anyway, it’s going to be crazy here so there’s no point in coming down. But don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay.”
As soon as she’d disconnected, the phone rang again. Phoebe’s stomach knotted. Rafe. She let it ring twice, finger hovering over the ignore button, then answered, after all.
“Phoebe.” His voice was thick with relief. “Thank you for answering.”
“Yeah, well, it’s kind of my thing today.”
“I am so sorry about all this. Hamilton’s issuing a cease and desist on the video.”
“Too bad he can’t issue one for my brain.”
“Phoebe... I know you probably don’t want to hear this—”
“Not really.”
“—but I need to talk about what happened this morning.”
Her jaw clenched together like a vise but she let him continue.
“First I need to explain something. I lied to you before.” There was a surprise. “When I said I’d been with a lot of women and couldn’t handle the intimacy...that wasn’t strictly true. I’ve only been with a few women. Very few.” Phoebe found that hard to believe. “And last night, with you, things were moving fast.”
“So you panicked and called in a pinch hitter.”
“No. I mean...not exactly. Shit, don’t hang up. This is coming out all wrong. What I’m trying to say is that I didn’t want to disappoint you, and I was very much afraid that I would. Not because of any failing in you, but because of me.”
Now he was trying “it’s not you, it’s me”? “Rafe, let’s just forget this ever happened. Obviously the media isn’t going to let us forget it anytime soon, but we don’t need to talk about it—and we don’t need to talk, period. I don’t know what your problem is—”
“I’m impotent.”
The rest of Phoebe’s sentence was strangled in her throat on an incoherent guttural noise. She stared at the phone, speechless. Now he was just yanking her chain. He certainly hadn’t had a problem while she was sucking his cock.
“Arousal isn’t an issue.” He’d anticipated her train of thought. “It’s the follow-through. And last night, with you...you have no idea how badly I wanted to be able to follow through. You looked so confused and disappointed when I stopped you. I just—a really stupid idea occurred to me and I acted on it without thinking. I knew Jacob could follow through. It’s not a physical condition—it’s psychological. He was able to override everything when he took control before. So I thought if I let him—God, this sounds even worse out loud. I conjured him and made a deal with him, that he could step in and take over when he was drawn by your...peak. But when I felt him trying to step in, I didn’t want it that way. I didn’t want him in between us. That’s why I stopped.” He went silent, having apparently said his piece.
Phoebe tucked her feet under her on the couch, trying to process this.
A full minute must have passed before Rafe spoke again. “Are you still there?”
“Yes. Sorry. I’m... I don’t know what to say.”
“That’s okay. That’s the usual response.” Rafe laughed nervously. “I mean, not to this. I’ve never done anything like this before. But to my problem. It’s uncomfortable. Anyway, I’m not expecting you to forgive me for how I handled it, and I’m not excusing myself. I just wanted you to know that I didn’t go through with it, and that it wasn’t intentionally malicious. Just...really goddamn stupid. And I also thought it would be fair to warn you about my problem since the topic is likely to come up in light of the video. Journalists dig up everything.”
“Right.”
“Okay.” Rafe expelled a long breath. “So that’s all I wanted to say. Thanks for hearing me out.”
“Rafe.”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you for explaining.”
“Yeah.”
Phoebe bit her lip, conflicted about whether to ask the question at the forefront of her mind. “There’s one thing I need to know.”
Rafe let out another long, slow breath. “Yeah.”
“This morning... He wasn’t part of it? At all?” Her skin flushed with heat at the memory of how he’d touched her. “That was all you?”
A long pause followed before he answered. “Everything I’ve got, love.”
Chapter 15
Rafe sat with his head between his knees after he hung up the phone. What had prompted him to add “love” to that sentence? He’d just told her one of the worst things he ever wanted to have to admit to anyone, especially a woman. Instead of that skin-crawling feeling of revulsion he usually got once someone knew his secret, he wished she were here with him. Which was bad news. Needing anyone was bad news. But falling for a woman whose trust he’d violated in a way there was no coming back from wasn’t just bad news. It was completely fucked up.
Unfortunately he had more urgent problems to deal with right now. Hamilton had convinced him it was time to make a public statement. He’d called a press conference for this afternoon in front of the courthouse, and Rafe had to present the right image. For a start, he needed a shower and a shave, and Hamilton was on his way over to coach him and pick out his suit. He just hoped to hell Hamilton knew what he was doing.
Having a suit picked out for him rankled. When Hamilton arrived and rummaged through Rafe’s closet, he told the lawyer so in no uncertain terms.
“If you don’t mind my saying, Rafael, your judgment hasn’t been the best lately.” Hamilton handed him a stuffy, funereal, double-breasted number. “You need to present an image of a grieving son and an embattled, ordinary upstanding citizen. Neither of which you demonstrated with your activities early this morning.” It was like his father was still alive.
“I’m aware of the myriad ways in which my judgment this morning was poor. You have no idea.”
The look Hamilton gave him was part sympathy, part reproach. “I see you’ve drawn the curtains on the front windows. That’s a good start.”
Rafe stepped into the adjacent bathroom to change while they continued talking. “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be skulking outside with an extreme telephoto lens. How did they even get inside the gate?”
“I’m guessing someone bribed one of your fine, upstanding neighbors for their code. Luckily, Arizona intrusion tort law is in your favor. The takedown orders for the video apply to the regular news outlets as well as the Reddits and YouTubes, regardless of jurisdiction of the website.” Hamilton nodded his approval as Rafe stepped out in the charcoal-gray worsted, and handed him a darker gray tie. “That’s exactly the right look. I don’t suppose you’d consider trimming the hair?”
Rafe slipped the tie under his collar. “I would not.”
“Might have to change your mind on that when this goes to trial. But for today, just slick it back. No tail. That says Colombian drug lord or telenovela star. Neither of which will do you any favors today.”
Rafe lifted an eyebrow and grabbed a hair tie from the bureau. “You say ‘telenovela’ like it’s a bad thing.”
* * *
Carter had texted Phoebe a warning about the press conference. It was like watching video of a train wreck she’d already been in, but she couldn’t
look away.
She barely recognized Rafe when he stepped up to the podium in a suit that seemed more like something Carter would wear. Yet even in his un-Rafe-like costume, he was intimidatingly stunning. Despite the way things had gone this morning, she couldn’t stop thinking about how he’d tasted and smelled, and the warm texture of his skin—and his tongue against the warmth of hers. Follow-through or no follow-through, the sex had been insanely hot. And then there were his parting words on the phone.
Standing in front of him to the left, Carter leaned in to the cluster of mikes on the podium. “My client, Rafael Diamante Junior, and I appreciate you all coming out today to hear his statement on the recent allegations made against him in the press, and on the death of his father, State Senator Rafael Diamante Senior, a longtime beloved member of this community.
“We request you hold any questions until after Mr. Diamante reads from his prepared statement, at which time you may direct them to me. Thank you.” He stepped aside and nodded to Rafe, who took a sheet of paper from his pocket and unfolded it on the podium. As he stood staring at it for several seconds without speaking, the crowd went silent enough to hear the repeated whir and click of cameras and camera phones from all directions.
“As you know, my father passed away yesterday at Verde Valley Medical Center.” The tempo of the whirs and clicks increased. “Many of you have sent your kind condolences, which I deeply appreciate. This loss could not have come at a more difficult time in my life, when the support of family is so important and its absence so keenly felt. While I’m confident the truth will support my innocence of the charges against me in the death of Barbara Fisher, I would like to address the allegations appearing in the press today with regard to the nature of my business relationship with Ms. Fisher.”
Rafe took a breath, looking strained, and Carter whispered something to him before he went on.
“At no time during my dealings with Ms. Fisher was I aware of her secondary business as a private escort. I hired Ms. Fisher for her advertised services as a psychic medium, consulting with her regarding a spiritual matter. Those were the services she provided, and nothing more. I would ask that you respect my privacy during this emotionally difficult time as I cope with both the strain of defending myself against these false charges and the devastating loss of my only remaining family. Thank you.”