Brayden and I have walked and talked a couple more times this week, and I was happy to feel the same pull as I did back in Tampa. Our conversations stayed light, and we never veered into hostile territory. It seems we've picked up where we left off nine months ago. We laugh and joke, and it's good to feel so relaxed around Brayden that I can tell him anything...well, almost anything. I haven't been able to tell him details yet.
Riley and the girls started to hound me more and more about my quote unquote "relationship" with "the hottie Mr. Knight." I swore up and down we're just friends, but they're getting very skeptical given the fact I've been spending most of my free time with him.
Tonight, however, is the first night my new friends will meet my old one. Nervousness doesn't even come close to what is flying around inside me. Brayden has never met anyone I'm connected with, so this is a big first for me.
I decided to cook dinner at my apartment. So, not only is this Brayden's first meeting with my friends, but it's also the first time he'll ever be in my personal space. Nervousness...yeah...I'm freaking the heck out.
My cell rings, and I wipe my hands from coating the chicken to answer it.
"Lillian Anderson."
"Lily?"
It's Damon. Oh no. What do I say? I don't want to talk to him, but I'm not a rude person, but I can't help the tinge of panic and uneasiness that overcomes me hearing his voice for the first time in almost four months. So, I don't speak because I really have nothing to say to him.
"Lily, please talk with me. Nora said you're reading her messages now. Please hear me out. I hate when we fight."
I take a deep breath to gain my composure. I can't do this now. I'm already about to have a panic attack with my friends and Brayden coming over. I need to get him off the phone.
"Damon, right now is not the best time to talk about this. I'm having company. I have to-"
"Is it that guy?" He asks softly.
"What guy? What are you talking about?" I reply not trying to hide my confusion.
"That guy I saw you with here."
My quick intake of breath made me almost dizzy. So Damon did somehow see Brayden and me together. It's not like we did anything. I wasn't cheating; we were just friends.
"How do you know about him?" He was about to speak when I cut him off again. "You know what, Damon. He was just a friend. I don't know what you saw or heard or whatever, but Brayden was and still is a friend to me. I really have to go."
"Wait, Lil. I saw you with him. More happy than I've ever-"
"Stop, Damon! I don't care what you saw or what you thought. Goodbye."
I hang up before I start doing something stupid like crying any more tears. A knock at my door has me wishing I never picked up the phone. I can feel I'm on the verge of breaking down. When I open the door to see Brayden, I'm overcome with the urge to feel his comfort from my chat with my ex a second ago.
"Hey, Lillian." He eyes me questioningly taking in my facial expression and obvious flustered state. "What's the matter?"
I open the door wider for him to come in. I don't say anything but direct him to the sofa. He takes my hand and pulls me down beside him. His touch is soothing and makes me start to lose the edge I had moments ago just by rubbing lightly over my knuckles. I close my eyes as my breathing calms to normal, and I let out a sigh of relief.
"Tell me what's the matter, Lil."
Opening my eyes, I'm met with brown ones of concern. "Damon called me."
"What did he want?"
"To talk, but I'm not ready to talk to him. I'm not sure I'll ever be. What they did hurt me so bad."
"Wanna tell me about it?" He asks with pleading eyes. I want to. I want to tell him so badly how much they hurt me, but I just can't. I can't tell him all the times I thought of him, all the moments of second guessing myself, and the most horrible day of my life.
I just shake my head and take a few more cleansing breaths. "Can you help me cook the rest of dinner?" I ask trying to get off this subject. I need to get back on neutral ground so I can make it through the next few hours with my friends.
"Sure. What are we making?" He replies with a smile.
"Chicken Parmagiana. Is that something you like?"
"Lil, I have a little Italian in me. It's one of my favorite dishes. What can I do to help you?"
I lift from the couch pulling on Brayden's arm as I used to do when I wanted him to follow me. And just like that, my phone call has been forgotten, and we're working as a team to finish the Parmagiana for dinner.
Thirty minutes later, another knock at the door pulls Brayden and me from our conversation and wine. This is it. Everything’s going to be fine. My friends won't go crazy on him. I hope.
I open my front door to Riley, Courtney, and Gwen. They smile wide and I can see their eyes searching for my mystery guest.
"Is he here?" Riley whispers.
"Yeah. Just please act cool and no embarrassing questions. Oh and don't mention his fiancée." I wince a little as I say the last word. I don't even want to mention Addison even though I know she's right there lingering in the back of my thoughts.
They all promise to be well behaved, so I escort them in my place and head toward Brayden. He turns, and I can hear the girls behind me mutter a wow in there. I told you he’s at the top of every one of my “best” lists.
"Brayden, these are my friends Riley, Courtney, and Gwen." I point to them individually. "Girls, this is my friend Brayden Knight."
It looks as though all three of these girls are blushing. I don't think this has ever happened before. I mean one, yeah, but all three...never.
"It's a pleasure to meet you ladies. I hope you're hungry. Lil here makes a mean Parmagiana." Brayden says with his dazzling smile. How could they be immune to such charm?
The dinner goes better than I expected it to. We talked about the enticing position of staff photographer and its upcoming availability, Brayden's job as CEO of his company, and recent guys the girls have met. Courtney made reference to the photo shoot, which made Brayden blush. I'm sure he thought I showed them his picture, which I didn't.
Garret had rehearsals for the Broadway play, but Ryan and Shelby arrived in the middle of the meal and blamed their lateness on Shelby's inability to find a nice outfit. However, I can see the eyes they're giving each other, so I know it has nothing to do with that. I'm just happy to see them enjoying their time together. They did bring dessert, which I failed to make, so they definitely made up for their tardiness in my eyes.
The dessert was a chocolate raspberry mousse cake. My mouth salivated at the sight of the fresh ripe raspberries and chocolate shavings even before we cut individual pieces. However, I would have given anything for a piece of this cake everyday even if my thighs and hips would disapprove. Each perfect triangular piece had four layers. First was a thick chocolate cookie crust followed by a chocolate mousse, a raspberry mousse layer with fresh raspberries, then a white mousse layer topped with a coating of chocolate ganache and raspberries and chocolate shavings. It looked like something out of a magazine, but it was chocolate and raspberries...my very own kryptonite.
"By the way you're looking at your dessert, I'd say you have died and gone to heaven," Brayden says as he slides his palm over the top of my hand covering my knee. I smile trying to hide the feeling I get when I feel the familiar burn of his skin on mine. "If I remember correctly, you are quiet indecent when it comes to anything chocolate. However, raspberries and chocolate...the combination may make you a tad extreme."
I go to tell him it's the sight of his abs with chocolate drizzles and fresh raspberries that could keep me satisfied for days, but stop myself when I hear the ringing of my cell phone. That would have been completely inappropriate, but somehow immensely gratifying to see his reaction to that little thought.
"Excuse me," I say as I stand up from the table to grab my phone from the bar. "Lillian Anderson."
"Lily bug. How are you?" I smile at my father's nickname for me.
&n
bsp; "Dad? Why do you sound so tired?"
"I'll be okay. This hospital food is horrendous."
"What hospital? What are you doing in the hospital?" I ask as my voice is laced with worry and loud enough so everyone turns to look at me.
"I just wanted to call you and tell you what's going on. I'm at Tampa General in their cancer center. They're running some tests. I should know something tomorrow morning. Mom didn't want to worry you and neither do I, but I had to call you. It feels it's been so long since we talked."
"Daddy..." I whisper, but as I do, I feel Brayden's hand slide around my waist, and the weight of everything that's happened today comes barreling out of me. Cancer? This is the worst news I've ever gotten.
"Sweetie, please don't cry. I'm going to be fine. I got a lot left in this world. You getting married and giving me grandkids and your sisters too. I didn't want to worry you. I just wanted to talk with you."
I can hear his emotions pouring out of him over the line. My father is the strongest man I know. He's kept a marriage together, loved my mother with a passion, had three daughters, and raised us to be loving, caring, compassionate people. I would be nothing without my father and mother.
"Okay, I love you. Tell mom to call me when y'all hear something alright?"
"Yes, Lily bug. You will be the first to know. I love you too. Talk with you tomorrow."
When I hang up and look into concerned brown eyes, I know I have to see my parents. They need me and I need them. It's been almost four months since I saw them last, and I miss them terribly.
"Is your father alright, Lil?"
I shake my head not knowing what to say or how to say it. "He's in the cancer center in Tampa General." I just cover my hands over my face and cry as Brayden leads me to the sofa. I can feel when he gets up but his spot is quickly replaced by the girls who speak words of comfort to calm me.
I don't know how much time passes when I hear Brayden address me again. I lift my head slightly, and he's in front of me kneeling with a sweet smile on his face.
"I need your help."
"It's okay. I'll pick up the dishes. I'm just really tired."
"Ryan and I already picked up from dinner. I need your help getting packed."
"Why would I need to get packed?"
His hands come to sit on my knees. I look to both his hands then back into his eyes. They're kind and warm and they make me relax just staring into his pools of warm chocolate.
"You're flying out in two hours, so we need to hurry and get you ready."
"What are you talking about?"
"You ask a lot of questions you know that? I got you a ticket to Tampa to see your father. You obviously miss him, and it seems like he needs you right now. Go pack and I'll bring you to the airport."
I don't know what to say if there's anything that will make this moment seem real. The feelings I have for this man overpower everything I think I know. He read my emotions, bought me a ticket home, and didn't push himself in the equation at all. If I didn't know better, I would start to think I was falling for him.
I throw my arms around his neck and hug tightly. His strong arms enclose around me, and my heart starts to beat a little faster. His smell surrounds my body, but I remind myself this is a friendly hug as a thank you for his kindness.
"Thank you, Brayden. More than you'll ever know. Thank you," I whisper.
As his right hand slides up my spine, his left tightens around my waist and says, "You're welcome, Lillian."
I pull out of his embrace to say a quick goodbye to my friends then run to my room to get packed for my trip. I don't know how long I'll be staying, so I throw a few days worth of clothes in a bag with some undergarments.
I don't know how to thank him for this. I'll have to think of something that's both meaningful and shows him how much I appreciate his gesture.
Chapter 14
Brayden
For the last twenty minutes Lillian's been packing for her flight to Tampa, I've been trying to process what I saw while making the reservations. I didn't want to talk out in the living room where the girls were trying to console her and in fear she would tell me to shove it and kick me out if I bought her a ticket. I went in the only other room in the apartment, her bedroom. It was probably ill-advised, but I did it anyways.
The furniture was nothing of what I expected from her. Hell, the entire apartment seemed too ultra-modern, whereas Lillian to me gives off the impression of a down-to-earth hometown girl vibe with warm colors, soft textures, and plush furnishings.
What was the most unexpected and had me frozen the whole time I was talking to the airline representative was the only picture she had in her room. It was one of me from the shoot a couple weeks ago. My eyes went wide just staring at my image attached to her mirror.
Why would she have a picture of me in her bedroom?
My mind races with possibilities. Does she feel something for me beyond friendship even after my admissions? Could she have felt like this nine months ago?
One thing's for sure is I need to get her to the airport in time for her flight, then I need to go see my brother. Even if my brother doesn't give me the best advice all the time, he does let me talk it out enough so sometimes the answer comes to me.
"Okay, I'm ready," Lillian says emerging from her room.
"Excellent. We should have plenty enough time to get you there before takeoff."
I grab her rolling luggage as she scoops up her camera, purse, and keys from the small table by the door. Once her doors locked and we're outside she asks, "Do you think the cab will take a while?"
"No, Lil. I'm driving you." She looks at me and I can't help but laugh at her baffled face. "As much as I love my walks with you, I do drive sometimes."
I walk her down a block to find my car is still in one piece and exactly where I put it. I can't be too careful with it. It's a classic. When I start to turn the key to unlock the door, Lillian speaks, "This is a joke, right?"
"What's a joke? We need to hurry so you can make it through security."
"No. I understand that, but you're seriously going to drive me to the airport in Mr. Miyagi's car? I kinda feel like Ali right now. Can I drive it too?"
I look back to search her face after she recognized the car. "You know about this car?" I ask incredulously.
"Brayden, Karate Kid was like my favorite moving growing up. It's even in the right yellow color. I'm in awe."
How is it that we've never talked cars before? Maybe it's just this one particular car. I mean the movie was popular back in the 80s. I have to test this out while I drive to the airport.
Once we're in route to our destination, I start my line of questions. "So you know what movie this was in, but do you know what kind of car it is?"
"Sure. It's a 1947 Ford Super Deluxe Convertible."
Wow. Okay. It was a popular car. Let's try something else. Collecting cars in a passion of mine and my brother's since we were kids. We've bought and sold always looking for the good investments. It's a quite enjoyable pastime for us and one where we actually agree most of the time.
"What about the black beauty from Miami Vice?" There is no way she'll get this one. I even had to research it to get it right.
"Hmm. Ferrari Daytona Spyder. 1972 if I remember correctly, but do you know what kinda car they replaced it with after Ferrari filed a lawsuit?"
I know about the lawsuit and how the film only used replicas, but damn if I don't remember the replacement car. How can she know this and not me?
"I'm stumped. What kind?"
"A 1986 Ferrari Tessterosa. Very fine car even now."
I don't know whether to stare at her or drop to one knee and ask her to marry me. I shake my head at my wayward thought. No. I can't do that.
"Now you have really intrigued me, Miss Anderson. How the subject of classic cars never came up, I don't know, but I have some more trivia for you."
"Shoot."
"The General Lee."
"Come on, Mr. Knig
ht. You can do better than the Dukes of Hazzard. 1969 Dodge Charger with the confederate flag on the top."
"Impressive. Alright. One of my favorite shows and not just because it has my last name."
"Knight Rider," She states plainly.
"Hmhmm. Go ahead. What's the car?"
"1984 Pontiac Trans Am."
"Ehhh. Try again," I say with a laugh.
"I thought it was an '84."
"Nope. It was an '82, but they do look the same. I could see how you would get them confused. Very well done, Miss Anderson."
This woman knows her movie cars. If she intrigued me anymore, I would be a goner with no hope of ever returning to the land we call reality. Lillian would be my new existence.
"So how do you know so much about cars, Mr. Knight?"
"I think the better question is how you know so much. You've shocked me, and it takes a lot to truly surprise me."
She shrugs her shoulders as she stares at the moving scenery. Her brown hair is billowing in the wind as the night lights shine down on her gorgeous features.
"My dad and I are real close. He loves cars. Whether they're in movies or not doesn't matter. He has a '57 Chevy Bel Air we use to ride to church in every Sunday. After, he would take me, my mom, and sisters on a Sunday drive like back in the day. It seems like we saw a new beach each week. Not to mention the pictures were great too."
"I can just imagine a younger you with a camera glued to her face," I say jokingly.
I can see the airport come into view and sigh knowing she's going to leave me shortly. I don't like this feeling of Lillian leaving. It's like she's taking a piece of me with her.
As I pull up outside of the drop-off area, Lil unbuckles her seat belt and makes sure she has her purse and camera. I keep the car running and grab her carryon bag and rolling luggage for check in.
"Thank you again for this, Brayden. I'll pay you back I swear," She says taking the bag from my hands.
"No need. Just spend some time with your family. They need you just as much as you need them." I look down at my watch to see how much time she has left. "You should hurry. This is the last flight until the morning."
Doubting Our Hearts Page 12