by Eve Langlais
“Marry me. Be my mate.” Nathan dropped to a knee and gazed up at her with shining blue eyes. It awed her that this hunk, strongest of all the boys, wanted her.
She tousled his dark hair, unable to resist its thick waves. “Are you insane? I just graduated from high school and haven’t even started college yet.” She protested, but with a smile. Who could resist the romance of the moment, and who could resist Nathan? She’d loved him it seemed like forever.
“So what? You can still take classes as my wife. Why wait? You know we’re meant to be together. To become mates for life.”
His use of the word “mates” reminded her of one uncomfortable fact. “But I can’t shift into a wolf like you, which means it won’t be a true mating bond.” Not to mention they couldn’t have children because, like a human, dormant Lycans couldn’t get pregnant from a shifter. Wolves could only mate with wolves if they wanted pure bred pups. The fact that Dana’s beast remained dormant meant the only children Dana would ever enjoy would belong to other men, human men.
“I don’t care if you’re a dormant. Actually, it’s kind of a blessing because that means I can keep you all to myself.”
His words were an uncomfortable reminder of the society she belonged to, even flawed as she was. As a Lycan who couldn’t make the transition to wolf, pack law didn’t require that her mate share her with his pack brothers. She was considered no better than a human. Her defect meant they could belong exclusively to each other.
“Your father will never agree,” she said softly.
Nathan’s brows drew together. “I really don’t give a fuck. You’re the one I want, the one that makes my wolf howl. Once he sees ours is a true mating, he won’t be able to refuse.”
Dana wanted to believe him, but Nathan’s father was scary, and not just because of his alpha status in the pack.
His hand clasped hers tightly, and she could read the uncertainty in his eyes as she hesitated. How could she let him doubt a moment longer her love for him? The only thing that mattered was their love for each other. Everything else would work out.
“Yes, I’ll marry you,” she cried, throwing herself at him. She hit his body, and they tumbled in the soft green grass, his body cushioning her fall. They wrestled as they embraced, the laughter of their youth music to accompany the setting of the sun.
When his touch became too bold, she pushed away from him, tempering her rejection with a smile. “Now that I’ve said yes, surely you can wait a little longer?” Strictly raised with a heavy-handed father, Dana had preserved her virginity, waiting for the one. Waiting for Nathan to realize she’d grown up.
“You’re killing me,” he groaned as he feigned stabbing himself with a dagger.
She giggled. “You are such a ham.”
“I prefer the term ‘dog,’” he replied with a leer.
She brushed his hair from his forehead. How she loved him. Almost nineteen and finally filling out his lanky frame, he was everything she could ask for in a mate, and even more amazing, he wanted her, flawed or not, too.
Why was she denying them both? Her body and desire burned as hotly as his. He’d chosen her above others, and she wanted no other man. She kissed him again, softly. He responded back with the same gentleness, and she made a bold decision. She pushed him down onto the soft grass and straddled him. When he quirked a brow in question, she replied by tugging off her shirt. The immediate burning gaze he turned on her made her insides melt.
“Are you sure?” he asked, even as she could feel his erection pressing against the crotch of her pants.
She didn’t reply, although she did blush when, with fumbling fingers, she unclasped her bra. But embarrassment over her bold action faded when his hands drew her down for kiss and he murmured, “You are so perfect.”
He rolled them so that she lay beneath him. He tore his shirt in his impatience to remove it, but her giggles were stifled when he pressed his body against hers, skin to skin. Her nipples pebbled against his chest as his tongue explored her mouth. His enthusiasm proved contagious and her hands roamed over the smooth skin of his back, clutching at him tightly when he inserted a thigh between hers and pressed against her cleft. Even with the clothing separating those regions, it excited her.
She moaned against his mouth and clutched him tighter. He tore his lips from hers and scorched a trail down her neck, his hot mouth on her bare skin making her gasp then cry out as he caught her puckered nub in his mouth and sucked.
Dana arched against him, the electric sensation filling her with a warmth and longing she didn’t understand—but wanted more of. He switched his mouth to her other breast while Dana writhed and moaned with pleasure.
His lips trailed lower, tickling over her soft belly and stopping at her waistband. She held her breath and opened languorous eyes to peer down at him. His blue eyes glowed, and his lips quirked as he used his teeth to unsnap her jeans then pull down the zipper. His hands tugged her pants down, leaving her clad in only her cotton briefs. Dana now wished she’d worn something sexier, not that he seemed to care if his burning gaze was an indication.
Nathan stood, and his hands went to his own zipper. Her cheeks flushed, and she closed her eyes but heard him as he stripped himself as well.
“Look at me, Dana.”
She didn’t want to, suddenly embarrassed. Nudity among Lycans was one thing, nudity for the sake of lovemaking a whole other.
He covered her body with his, the shocking heat from his rod pressing against the cloth of her panties. Startled, she opened her eyes and found him staring intently at her.
“Do you want me to stop?”
And disappoint him—disappoint herself? “M-make love to me,” she replied, her trepidation fading at his possessive look.
His hand slid down her side to her hip. A ripping sound and her panties were gone. She spread her thighs at his urging, and he settled his body between her legs. He bent down to kiss her, and she clasped at his shoulders, tensing at the probing of his cock. He pulled back and bent himself to suck at her nipples until he had her arching. As he laved her breasts, he slid a hand between their bodies and cupped her sex. She couldn’t help the moisture that seeped at his gentle touch.
Her moist sex acted like an awaited signal because he braced himself above her again, the head of his shaft poking at her pussy. Then he pushed his way in.
Her breathing hitched at the stretching sensation. Slowly he inched into her until he met the barrier of her innocence. With a swift thrust, he swept past it.
The pain of her breaching made her cry out, but he remained gentle with her, letting her adjust around his size before moving again. The sensation was odd at first, but as he butted up against and in her while kissing her, her passion reignited, and soon she met him, thrust for thrust. She panted, her body building toward something, something that felt so good she keened and perspired. When her orgasm hit, a mind-boggling event that saw her crying out his name, she knew she’d made the right choice in letting him claim her body. She clasped him to her when he bellowed his own pleasure and collapsed on top of her.
“I love you,” she whispered, overcome at what they’d shared.
He nuzzled her neck, placing soft kisses on her skin. “And I love you, baby. From now on, it’s just going to be you and me, forever.” She liked the sound of that.
He rolled them so he lay on the bottom, and they snuggled together in the aftermath, her body draped over his. Passion assuaged, she blushed to think of how she would dress again under his avid gaze. Her ardor now cooled, her shyness increased. She reddened against his smooth chest as she realized she’d have to stand up and clothe herself soon. They would both have to, for the sun had set and night fell, bathing the glen in shadow, which meant her father would be expecting her home.
Along with the brightening night stars, the moon arrived. The wispy cloud cover of earlier parted to reveal the white globe in its full majestic glory. Its appearance meant the pack would be gathering for its midnight run shortly
. No Lycan could resist the call of a full moon. Heck, younglings past the first spurt of puberty tended to spontaneously shift.
Not a thing she worried with around Nathan. As a full Lycan, he’d long ago mastered the moon madness that affected their kind, a madness she’d never experienced as a dormant.
The moon’s rays bathed her nude body, turning her skin the color of alabaster. Dana squirmed as her exposed and illuminated skin first tickled then itched. She jumped up from her cuddly spot on Nathan, suddenly uncaring of her nudity as the itch turned into pain.
“What’s wrong?” Nathan asked, concern etching his voice. He stood and reached his hands out to her.
Pain ripped through her, sending her muscles into involuntary spasms. “Nathan, help me,” she gasped before falling to her knees, still convulsing.
His strong hands came to stroke her as she twisted on the ground, the searing pain spreading outward into all of her limbs.
“Oh my God, Dana. You’re changing. You’re finally changing.” He sounded so excited, but caught in a screaming agony that seemed never-ending, she could only wail, and then howl, as her body morphed with sickening cracks into that of a wolf.
Dana panted as she lay on the ground, her body changed. Disoriented, but thankful the pain had receded, she struggled to her feet, wobbly like a newborn colt. She shook her head to clear a vision that, while sharper, no longer perceived things in a manner she was used to. Nathan’s hands continued to stroke her fur.
“Dana, you’re a wolf.” He sounded so awed.
She, however, wasn’t as impressed. It had bloody hurt.
“It must have been the moon,” he said in wonder.
Dana snorted, or tried to. What came out was more like a cross between a bark and a wheeze. Wolf mouths weren’t meant to speak human words. But her mind still worked, and it churned furiously, trying to understand what had just happened.
She’d been exposed to the moon many a time before, mostly by her father, in an attempt to trigger the change. He’d tried in her tweens, when her menses first started. He’d tried in her teens, when she grew into her more womanly shape.
He’d even tried after feeding her one nasty concoction after another, all attempts to trigger her dormant Lycan gene. None of it had worked, so why now?
Dana’s eyes caught the pile of clothes on the ground, and the gears in her mind stopped whirring. The only difference this time was the loss of her maidenhead to Nathan.
Dana wondered for a horrified moment if she’d be forced to confess her transgression with Nathan to her father. She hoped the fact that she could now shift would distract her father from asking the embarrassing question of how. And, even more important, prevent the beating he was sure to inflict for having given in to her baser desires.
But that worry could wait for later. She was a wolf!
She moved a few steps forward, the adjustment to four limbs strange but not hard to pick up. She heard Nathan gasp, and she turned too quickly, almost landing on her nose. Nathan was gone. In his place stood a dark-haired wolf that seemed to grin at her with its lolling tongue.
She gave him back a canine grin of her own. Suddenly, she didn’t feel too bad anymore. The pain was gone. Her dad would probably be ecstatic, and best news of all, she was destined to become Nathan’s wife. With a joyful yip, she walked then ran across the clearing into the woods, the exhilaration of her new body filling her.
She raced side by side with Nathan, encountering other wolves also out loping under the moon. Their howls filled the night sky, and Dana, caught up in the moment, enjoyed every second of it.
She awoke late the next day, her father having let her sleep in and miss her chores given the incredible events of the night before. And she wasn’t just talking about the fact that she could now shift like the others. Nathan had asked her to marry him! She would be his wife. As if thinking of him had conjured him, she heard a tapping at her window.
She flung back her covers and went to the window in only a T-shirt and underwear. Modesty seemed stupid given their lovemaking. Not to mention her sudden change back into human shape, in all its naked glory, to an audience of several. Her blushes had at least kept her hot until someone gave her a shirt to drape herself in. Even more warming were Nathan’s glares at those who openly leered. Who said jealousy wasn’t attractive?
She unlocked her window and slid it open so her fiancé—she giggled in her head at that title—could come in.
He grinned widely at her as he enveloped her in a hug that made her squeak. She squealed as he twirled her around. Then she got a look at his face.
“What happened to you?” she gasped.
Both of his eyes were swollen and purple, and his lips puffed up. She pushed back and tugged at his shirt. He didn’t fight her as she lifted it and saw the bruises that peppered his skin. “Oh, Nathan,” she wailed, her eyes filling with tears.
“I had a disagreement with my dad. Don’t worry. It’s already mostly healed.”
She sucked in a breath, horrified that this was what he considered better. How badly had his dad hurt him and why? “But—”
He didn’t let her finish her question, kissing her breathless instead. “Forget about me. How do you feel?” he asked.
How like him to be more concerned about her. She moved back into the circle of his arms and leaned her head on his chest. “It feels like last night was a really weird but wonderful dream.” One she’d treasure forever.
“It was real. Are you excited you’ve found your wolf?”
“I’m most excited by the fact I’m going to be your wife,” she answered honestly, peering up at him as she twined her fingers through the hair that curled at his nape.
A shadow crossed his face. “Me too. You’ll be glad to know we’ve actually got permission from both of our parents to go ahead. And don’t worry, my dad and yours promised we’d have plenty of time between now and the first baby for us to enjoy each other.”
Her brow creased with confusion. “Of course we will. Besides, silly, having a baby doesn’t mean the fun stops. After all, we’ll need to have lots of fun to make that big family we talked about.” The mention of babies elated her. Now that she’d come into her heritage, she could have pups of her own instead of envying those around her.
His jaw tightened. “Of course we’ll still have fun together. It’ll just be an adjustment sharing you. I’d kind of gotten used to the idea of having you all to myself.”
Dana froze and searched his face for a hint she’d misunderstood. “Excuse me? What do you mean share me? You told me last night it would be just you and me. You know that’s what I want.”
“But that was before your wolf found you. I know this is hard. I had it out with my dad over it, but as he reminded me, the well-being of the pack comes before that of the individual. And you know as well as I do that because full Lycan females are rare they are to be shared. At least your father and mine agreed to wait to add others until after we’ve conceived our first pup.” A common practice as was genetic testing to track bloodlines and prevent inbreeding.
“How decent of you all to make that decision for me,” she replied sarcastically.
“Dana, it’s for the best.”
“He beat you into agreeing to this, didn’t he?” His bruises now made so much sense.
Nathan shrugged. “I’ll admit I wasn’t too keen on the idea at first. But Dad has a point, and your dad also made it a condition of his agreeing to our marriage. I’ll take sharing you against your dad giving you to someone else any day.”
Dana pushed out of his arms, aghast at his nonchalant attitude. She clung tightly to her anger to hide the breaking of her heart. “But you said it would be just you and me. You promised.” She hated how pitiful she sounded. She hated even more that he didn’t seem to care.
“It’ll still be us, most of the time. And your dad says if I don’t fight it, I’ll get a vote when it comes to choosing the others. I’ll make sure it’s guys you’ll like, like my best f
riend, John. You’ll see. It won’t be so bad.”
Dana snapped, “Yes, it will be. It’s not you who’s got to whore himself out. I won’t do it, and if you loved me, you wouldn’t make me.”
“I don’t have a choice,” he shouted back.
“Yes, you do. We could run away. Just you and me. Build a life together, away from the pack and its stupid laws.” She gave him a chance. A chance to redeem himself. To prove his love to her.
“I can’t do that. Where would we go? How would we live? And besides, you know I’m in line for the alpha position when my dad gets too old.”
“So you’re choosing the pack over me?” she asked in a quiet voice.
“No, I’m choosing both of you.”
Dana shook her head. “No, you aren’t. If you truly loved me, you wouldn’t ask me to do this. Not knowing how much I hate the thought. Get out.”
“Aw, come on, don’t be like this, baby. You know I love you. I don’t have a choice. It’s pack law.”
“Fuck you, and fuck the pack laws. Get out! Get out! Get out!” She punctuated her screams with the throwing of objects that she picked up randomly off her dresser.
Nathan stared at her in shock, letting the missiles bounce off him. “But I love you. Please, Dana, don’t be like this.”
“No, you don’t love me,” she wailed. “Get out. Please, just go.” She collapsed to the floor, sobbing, unable to face his calm betrayal of what she’d thought was something pure. Something for them alone. Something special.
She heard a rustle, and she half expected to feel his hands on her, comforting her. Instead, she heard him say, “You’ll get over it in time. You’ll see once we’re married and the babes start coming. It won’t be so bad.”
But she knew better. She’d watched it with her own mother. The smiles when it was just them and her dad. The stony face when the others came to claim their turn. The tears. The numerous miscarriages. And finally her death in childbirth.
Dana knew she was biased, given her mother’s hysterics over being shared. She knew not all the women felt that way. Some even lived in perfect harmony with their numerous males, popping out babies. But all the happy ones in the world couldn’t excuse those who had to be led in tears and drawn faces to do their duty for the pack.