I didn’t read the note, but she mentioned it has instructions for the car I am driving on loan. I sure as hell won’t be driving it back to Florida. If I never see that state again it will be too soon.
I’ve crossed the Kentucky state line and still no Tread. I’d rather not just appear at the Roadhouse, but I will if it comes to it.
Chapter 12
Drag Creek
Romeo
Christ. Being back in Drag Creek is like opening up an infected wound with rusty scissors. It’s only been a few years but it might as well be longer. Seeing Baby’s car, her Pepto pink Mustang sitting with weeds growing through the rims on the tires, makes it all too real. If I stayed away I could pretend she was alive and well, just not a part of my life anymore. But being here and seeing it with my own eyes, and feeling the emptiness her death has left here is haunting.
I never would’ve thought a person’s spirit is the embodiment of a place, but this place just lit up when she was here. The world was a little brighter having her smile in it. Now that she’s gone…I can’t put it into words. I see familiar faces staring at me like I’m a ghost. Christ, maybe I am. I don’t feel like I belong here anymore. I wouldn’t be here now if Rebel hadn’t called. He needs me to sign adoption papers for Miracle, my dead whore of a wife’s daughter she tried to pass as mine.
I left Jamie at home with Sunshine, but Dawn insisted on coming with me. She misses home. I think it mostly has to do with her breaking up with her boyfriend, but I’m wise enough not to mention it. Teenage girls and their hormones, fucking nuts. If I wasn’t already gray headed she would turn my hair white.
There is one person I need to see before anyone else. Let’s just hope he doesn’t shoot first and ask questions later.
A wave of nostalgia crashes into me as I step through the backdoor of the Roadhouse. Memories of the past hit me square in the gut, nearly taking me to my knees. Baby’s smile, her laugh, the way she walked. Her smell invades my mind as though she were standing in front of me.
I’m a tough son of a bitch, but confronting these feelings I’ve pushed aside, is motherfucking hard.
I owe her memory better than this.
Better than what I have given.
I loved her.
I’ll never stop.
But she’s gone.
I made sure of that when I walked away from the one thing I’ve ever wanted more than breathing. The love I feel for Baby isn’t healthy. It wasn’t good for either of us.
All I did was bring us both pain. Now she’s dead. I can only move forward. I can’t change what has come to pass.
I’ve spent many years here, and now, I feel like an intruder walking into someone else’s life. I don’t live the club life anymore. I still live by the biker code and the truth is I miss the brotherhood. I’d come back, but I’m not so sure that Sunshine would give up what we have in California easily. Not that I am welcome to return. I left without permission. I walked out on my club. I turned my back on my brothers for a woman—Grim’s woman. Sure they were divorced, but I knew he’d never accept it.
I love Grim, he is the best friend I’ve ever had, but I love Sunshine more. I’d make her my wife if she’d get a divorce from that piece of shit, Paul. I’d kill him if she wouldn’t hate me for it. She said she couldn’t do that to Patrick. Her admission makes me feel like a sorry bastard considering I did the very same thing to my children. They’ll never see LL again thanks to me. The bitch had it coming though and they are better off, even if they will never understand. I think Dawn knows what really happened to her mom, but she never talks about her, at least not to me. She looks so much like her the older she gets, same long, yellow hair. Even her body has the same, curvy, busty frame. She’s only sixteen and looks all woman.
“Dad, wait up.” She comes trailing after me.
“Come on.” I take her to the front. Foxie is behind the bar.
“Keep an eye on her,” I demand and her eyes light up like fucking twinkling stars when she looks up at me.
“Well I’ll be damned; didn’t think I’d ever see your handsome mug again in this life.” She comes around the bar and kisses my cheek. “Hey Dawn, you’ve grown up. Filling out real nice. Nona you watch the bar. I think I’ll have Dawn help me in the kitchen. Too many roaming eyes and hands out here.”
Good ol’ Foxie, straight to the point. Never missing a beat.
“Grim around by chance?”
“Don’t know if that’s a good idea, but he’s in the office downstairs with Rebel.”
I grunt and head to the stairs once I see that my daughter is out of sight. I know Foxie won’t let a damn thing happen to her.
Pictures of my old life line the wall going down the stairs. There’s even a few of Slim and me. Sorry bastard that he was, he had good intentions when he founded our brotherhood. Life just got in the way and had other plans for us. To be that young again, with problems we thought held the fate of the world over our heads. I chuckle. We didn’t have real worries, not really, in the beginning.
I walk on down revisiting my memories—my shoulda, coulda, wouldas.
Grim
“Damn, I feel for Amy. They fucked her clear up. Hell, we’ve both seen some shit and lived to tell about it, but I wouldn’t feel right sending her back to those bastards. We need a better plan.”
Rebel pinches the bridge of his nose. “Fuck, with all this shit going on I forgot to mention, we’ve got company coming.”
Before he can tell me just who in the Sam hell he’s invited in, a sickening sweat breaks across my forehead. Pulling my bandanna from my back pocket, I dab it across my face. I down my bottle of water that Foxie insists I drink more of.
She has been after me to start ‘living healthy.’ Says a man my age needs to consider his health. The reaper will take me when my time has come. I don’t fear death, but I like fucking my woman, so I do what she says, to an extent. “A happy wife gives good head,” or whatever the fuck it is they say. Haven’t married her but the stubborn woman knows I love her. I’ll never marry again.
A knock sounds at the door and I pull my piece. Don’t trust no motherfuckers. Rebel shakes his head, muttering how I am paranoid, walking to the door. Better to be paranoid than dead before ye know it. I’d at least like to look death in the face and give him the finger before I go.
“Who’s it?” Rebel asks.
“It’s me,” answers the gruff voice of the sorriest bastard I’ve ever known. Fucking pussy. Goddamn wife and daughter fucking Romeo.
Rebel throws the door open and my first instinct is to shoot the pansy ass bitch standing before me.
“Leave us,” I command Rebel. He takes one look at me and does as he’s bid. Boy knows not to interfere. Why the fuck did he bring him back here? I’m gonna shove my boot up his ass and outta his Goddamn throat for this shit.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
“I’m here on business with Rebel,” he states being casual but flippant. I don’t like it.
“Why, you come back to fuck his bitch too? Or should I bend over and see if you can fuck me any harder than you have already.” I reach inside the desk and toss a bottle of lube at him. “Here at least get me wet first this time.”
“Look, I didn’t come here to talk about Sunshine. I wanted to say I’m sorry about Baby. Christ, you don’t know how my nights are haunted by her face.”
“You don’t get to talk about my daughter. You aren’t fit to eat her shit!”
“Goddamn it! Are we back to this shit again. I fucked up we both know it, but I can’t bring her back, and you don’t want Sunshine. So what the fuck do you want from me? I thought just for fucking once, you’d be past it all. But you can’t let it go. You never could. Not when it came to Red, Benji, Hook, or Slim. For once in your life get the fuck over yourself!”
“Fuck you.” I cock my gun ready to end him when I see a shadow move behind the door.
Then I hear a soft voice say, “Daddy you in here?”
Sneaky bastard knew I’d want to make him bleed out on my floor, probably brought the girl on purpose. If she were older I might teach him a fucking lesson. Show him what it’s like for ye brother of the road to fuck ye daughter right under ye nose. But I’m not Romeo.
“We don’t have shit to discuss. You are dead to me. Handle your business and get the fuck outta my club and my town. And take ye kid with ye too before I show you what you put me through,” I growl at him as spit flies from my lips with my threat.
I nudge his shoulder hard as I leave him to go fuck my anger away with my woman, since I can’t kill him, yet.
Just as I am about to take Foxie home, Tread interrupts, saying he has a plan. About time somebody around here got their finger out of their ass and started doing something.
Rebel
Grim comes stomping up the stairs. His face is painted in rage. I don’t try and stop him. I knew it wasn’t a good idea to just spring Romeo on him, but if he knew he was coming he would have plotted to kill him. Romeo’s done some fucked up shit, but no more than the rest of us have. I don’t want to see him dead. Besides, I need him to sign off on paperwork concerning Miracle. Chelle and I are her legal guardians but we want to adopt her.
“I see you are still standing and I don’t see any blood. You and Dawn ready to ride out to the house and see Miracle?”
Dawn’s face beams at the mention of her sister. They haven’t seen each other in person, but Dawn and Jamie Skype with her on holidays and birthdays. Just because I am raising Miracle as mine doesn’t mean I want her to lose her relationship with them. I ruined my brother’s life and I’ll never let my mistakes have a place in my children’s lives.
“Yeah, we’ll follow you.”
I shoot a text to Chelle and let her know we are on our way. Miracle has no idea she is about to see her sister. I wanted it to be a surprise. She is such a great kid. Never have a problem at school either. I can remember mom getting calls about Baby and us boys what seemed like daily. She was always having to come down and smooth shit over. Although Striker and me found ourselves suspended more than a few times. At least we graduated. They were probably just happy to be rid of us.
Striker, damn, I wish I could have been a better brother. Fuck, I wish a lot of things. But my old man used to say, “wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which fills up faster.”
Right now, I am wishing this shit with Romeo seeing Miracle goes smoothly. I know how he feels about her, and a part of me can understand why he feels the way he does, but damn, she is just a child. She didn’t ask for LL to fuck around on him and have her as a result.
Them two was a fucking mess. Romeo should write a book titled The Biker’s Guide of Women Not to Fuck.
Chapter 13
Amy
“What do you want from me Amy?”
“Does it matter Grady?” I shake my head and throw my hands up. “Girls like me…we don’t get what we want.”
“I want to tell you that I love you, but my kind of love isn’t simple. It’s the kind of love that eats away at your soul. I want to own you. I want to fuck you until the break of dawn. But most of all—I just fucking want you,” he blurts out the words I want to hear but wasn’t prepared for. “The way I feel about you scares the shit out of me. I’ve never felt this way. It’s killing me! I’m torn between loving you and wanting him!” He is tugging at his hair and pulling it down. The dark waves spill across his shoulders and I want nothing more than to go to him and run my fingers through it. I want to say that his words make everything okay, but I can’t. Life isn’t as simple as an I love you said in fear.
“So fucking tell him, fuck him, love him, or get him out of your damn system before saying you love me!” I can’t do this with him. I zip my bag and turn my back to him, with my heart bleeding on the floor.
I glance once over my shoulder before walking to the door. Grady is staring at the floor with his mouth gaping wide open. Maybe the words I said were harsh, but they were true, and he needed to hear them. As much as this is killing me, it’s for the best. I won’t be his easy lay any longer. Even I deserve better than that.
I swing the door to the apartment open, coming face to face with Tread’s hand as he is preparing to knock. He gives me five across the eyes, hard. Damn, that stung. I can’t hold in my tears as I cry out in shock and pain. If it didn’t hurt, I could probably laugh at the absurdity of the situation.
“Fuck, I’m sorry Amy. Damn girl.” He pulls me in for a hug as I try to blink. A black dot floats across my eye.
“The fuck is wrong with you?” Truth comes shoving from behind.
“Goddamn, it was an accident!” I shriek. “He didn’t hurt me on purpose. Which is more than I can say for you.”
Tread is looking between the lot of us, not knowing what is going on. Doesn’t matter though. He’ll find out soon enough. Truth can’t keep hiding who he is. He kisses my eyelid and Truth goes off.
“Don’t fucking touch her!” He jerks on my arm pulling me out of Tread’s grip.
Tread shoves him back. “The fuck is your problem man?”
Truth stays silent, grinding his teeth and clenching his fists.
“Truth wants your ass, and I can’t keep pretending we’re something we’re not,” I state the cold, hard truth. “Can I crash in your guest room until I figure out where I want to go?”
He scratches his five o’clock shadow as Grady’s face turns from a scowl to a grimace. “Sure darlin’, but ain’t nobody touching my ass. Fuck man, my dick doesn’t get hard for ass play.” He punches Truth in the shoulder, kisses my cheek and laughs, blowing it off. “We got club shit to discuss, so if you two can put your dirt aside—I have a solution to our problem. And I have a friend who needs Amy’s help.”
“No problem,” Truth grits out through clenched teeth.
“Fine,” I relent looking anywhere but at Truth’s betrayed expression.
Christa
I don’t know what I’m doing here or why I agreed to this. Looking around Marc’s place, I wonder if he lives with someone. There is obviously the touch of a woman through the rooms. There is no way he picked out the floral décor. Did he love her? Does he still? I can tell whoever she was or is no longer lives here the more I look around. The telltale signs of a man on his own are apparent at the spill stains on the rug and the watermarks on the table. Ashes and empty bottles line the kitchen counter. I’m fighting the urge to clean it for him. I shouldn’t care. I shouldn’t even be here, but he was right. I can’t dance and I need his help. I have no idea what I am getting myself into.
And now he knows my family secret. He knows the truth, that my brother is a part of this fucked up family, club, or whatever the fuck they are. I don’t know what to do. Maybe Tread is right, maybe I should tell my brother who his father was. Maybe then he will get this chip off his shoulder. The one he carries around because my dad could never accept him.
I’ve tried so hard to keep him away from this world, but it seems it doesn’t matter. It was bound to catch up with us eventually, and now it has.
A few weeks ago, I never would have guessed I’d be in Marc’s living room waiting for a stripper to teach me some moves. I feel like an idiot. This whole deal is fucked up and awkward.
But what choice do I have?
I can’t walk away.
Not this time.
The stakes are too high.
Tread
Fuck it all to hell. I didn’t know Truth was into dick. My dick. Fuck. Goddamn motherfucker. Damn it all to hell. What am I supposed to do with that shit? I don’t have a problem with him swinging both ways. I just n
ever thought about it really. Never had to until now.
Could I be with a man?
With Truth?
Could I go there?
Would I go there?
Fuck if I know, I’ve always said I’d try anything once. And thank the fuck, I don’t have time to worry about it right now. Christa is waiting for me and club business comes before all else.
Truth and Amy are following me silently to my trailer. Amy can teach Christa to dance, so she won’t have to step foot back in that club. Grim told me what she went through. Shit is fucked up. He signed off on my plan. Now just to implement the damn thing.
I get introductions out of the way quickly, leaving out the fact that Christa’s little brother, JT is Rebel’s half-brother. That secret isn’t mine to share. If Christa tells him the truth, I am going to sponsor him and bring him into the fold. I’ll bring him home where he belongs. Rebel just might get the chance to prove he knows how to be a blood brother after all.
Grim proposed that the club will catch up the mortgage on Christa’s family home, if she scopes out shit on Lenny and Perry for us. Seeing how Perry lives at her grandmother’s it shouldn’t be that hard for her.
She doesn’t need to be a Vegas Showgirl or a detective. She just needs enough skill to get what we need—the layout of the floor plan and who comes and goes.
Amy agrees to help, reluctantly. I hope whatever this shit is between her Truth, they get the fuck over it and soon! They are sitting on opposite sides of the room. Tension is radiating in the middle of them.
I send Christa and Amy to an empty bedroom to get started while I fill Truth in.
“Think this shit will work?”
“Don’t see why it wouldn’t.” I shrug.
“You trust her?” He hooks his thumb towards the bedroom.
“Don’t really have a choice. One-off is getting his patch, and we need to put these fuckers in the ground, before shit gets any bigger.”
A Rebel Love (Black Rebel Riders' MC Book 7) Page 9