He groans, and once again tugs my nipples, until the orgasm he threatened seems to pulse through my veins. Just when I’m about to tumble over the edge his touch becomes featherlight.
“Give me that mouth,” he says, his voice filled with something I don’t even know how to describe.
Mindless, I twist, craning my neck, and he captures my lips.
The kiss explodes between us.
It’s all hot and demanding, full of searching tongues and teeth.
I’ve never been this turned on. This needy and desperate. This greedy. A sudden, insatiable wildness takes over and I pour all my desire into the kiss.
He groans, runs his hand up my arm to curl around my neck. His fingers tighten in my hair, pulling. The kiss grows deeper, more forceful.
I want friction. I want his body on top of me.
I move and his other arm clamps around like a vise, keeping me in place.
I scratch my nails over his arm and whisper, “Please.”
“No,” he says against my lips.
It frustrates me. Infuriates me. But something else happens too, something I don’t understand, but is an undeniable fact. His denial increases my already near crazy desire.
I arch my neck, deepening our contact.
The room grows thick with tension. The air is humid, full of sex and lust.
The only sound is the fusing of our mouths and our hard pants.
He pulls away, his chest a rapid rise and fall against my back. “You ready?”
God yes. I’ve never been so ready in my life. I nod, unable to form words that adequately describe my desire.
“Settle against me.” His voice is husky.
I do and his hand splays over my stomach, but doesn’t move. “I want you to ask me.”
Unsure, I blink, my brow pulling tight. “Ask you?”
“Yes.” His teeth brush over my pounding pulse. “Ask me to make you come.”
I’m so on edge, and my need for him is pounding through my blood. Asking is far easier than it should be. I lick my lips. “Please make me come, Leo.”
His fingers dip below the waistband of my shorts. “Someday soon it will be my cock.”
My head falls back against his shoulder. “Yes.”
His hand brushes over the band where my panties meet my stomach. “If you’re mine, I will take you anywhere, anytime I want. Where we are, who we’re with, won’t matter.”
This feels like all I have ever wanted, I lift my hips, urging him forward. “You have no idea how much I want it.”
“I do.” He taps my thigh. “Open.”
I comply, holding my breath as I wait.
“I want you just as much, Jillian.” He brushes over my clit and I bite back the whimper. “None of that, I want to hear you.”
His fingers glide effortlessly over my slick flesh and it’s his turn to moan. “You are so fucking wet.”
It feels so damn good and I rock my hips.
He removes his hand, but before I can protest, he takes mine and slips our entwined fingers down my panties. His voice is gruff in my ear. “Can you feel that?”
I’m soaked. Drenched. Wetter and hotter than I’ve ever been. I bite my lip and nod.
He slides my fingers up and down. “That’s mine.”
My muscles contract and everything inside me screams my agreement.
He releases my hand. I place it on his thigh as his fingers strum over my clit, eliciting such exquisite pleasure I think I might die.
He enters me, first one finger then the next, but instead of pumping in and out, he hooks his fingers, presses the heel of his hand against my clit and starts a slow, steady grind.
It is the worst kind of torture.
Enough pressure to drive me insane, to put me on the very edge of tumbling over into what I’m sure will be the best orgasm of my life, but slow enough I never quite go over.
I clench and keen.
My hips move in tiny little circles in time with his hand.
Sweat breaks out at my temples.
I can no longer control the sounds coming from my throat.
It’s too much. It’s not enough.
It’s everything I thought he’d be like. And nothing like it.
I’m a mess of contradictions. I’m wanton need. All-consuming, mindless lust.
“Leo.” His name on my lips, I barely recognize the sound of my voice. “Oh god. What? Please. Oh.”
“That’s right, girl. Let me see you lose it.” He switches the tempo, shifts his hand, hitting another, sharper spot. He presses on my clit.
And I tumble off the cliff, and intense pleasure that starts at my toes and rolls up my legs, crashes over my skin, shaking my whole body as it storms through me.
I lift up, riding his hand in the most depraved way as the orgasm goes on and on in seemingly never-ending waves of sheer, excruciating ecstasy until I finally collapse in a heap, lying limp as aftershocks break across my skin.
He kisses my temple and whispers in my ear, “That’s what I wasn’t telling you.”
I wake with a start, my heart pounding as I go from a deep sleep to instant awake. The TV’s on, turned to a basketball game. I jerk up, glancing wildly around my living room, until I find Leo sitting in the opposite corner of the couch, watching me with an amused expression.
I push my mess of hair off of my cheeks. “What happened?”
He smiles. “You fell asleep. How do you feel?”
My brows pull tight as I try and remember falling asleep, but the last thing I recall is the orgasm. At the memory of my behavior I bury my face in my hands. I was crazy.
He chuckles, and his finger brushes over my legs. “If that embarrasses you, things are going to get very interesting.”
I let out a tiny scream. “I was insane.”
He grips my ankle. “You were.”
“I-I’ve…um… Never been like that before.”
“Let me see your face.”
I shake my head.
He squeezes my foot. “Yes.”
I’ll have to face him eventually so I lower my hands.
His dark eyes are intent on mine. “I’ll tell you a secret.”
“Yes,” I manage to croak out.
“Making you out of your mind. That wet. Making you come that hard. That’s the goal. Every time. And if the guy you’re with isn’t working to do that, he’s not worth the effort.”
I’m twenty-eight, I’ve been with my fair share of guys. I’ve had good sex, bad sex, and every other type of sex in between, but I’ve never had a man that treated me with the kind of attention Leo lavished on me. And certainly no one that wanted nothing in return. I think back to his statement last night and lick my dry lips. “What about last night, when you said I had to drop what I’m doing and do your bidding.”
The corners of his mouth tip up. “Well, that’s true, but I might have left out a few key details.”
I narrow my eyes. “But why?”
He shrugs one shoulder. “Like I said earlier. I have no experience with this. I’ve always dated women who knew what they were and what they wanted. I’m not sure how to go about things and I don’t want to sell you on something you don’t really want.”
A question forms in my mind, and I don’t want to ask it, but I force myself. Because after what I experienced with him, I have to be careful. He could ruin me. I swallow past my tight throat. “Do you want to try and figure it out?”
He doesn’t answer right away and my heart pounds against my ribs, terrified he will say no. Which is all the more reason to know his answer now, instead of living with the fantasy that this is going somewhere it’s not.
He sighs and my stomach drops. I prepare myself for the letdown.
He shifts his attention to me in that intent, focused way he has. “I feel like I’ve been fighting this attraction to you forever. I thought I was doing the right thing, but now, I’m not so sure. I don’t know if it will work between us. But I want to find out.”
&nbs
p; “Me too.” My voice cracks. I’ve never been so happy to be wrong. “How should we start?”
He smiles. “We start by you getting a good night’s sleep.”
I frown. “But I’m not tired.”
“We’ll see.”
I decide if we’re going to do this, that I’m going to stay true to myself, despite this whole dominant thing I don’t really quite understand. And the truth is, I’m the kind of woman who says what she wants. Waiting to see if a guy can guess isn’t my nature. “I don’t want you to go home yet.”
He studies me, then nods. “I can stay for a while.”
I beam. Well, that was easy.
He crooks a finger, gesturing me closer. “Come here, you’re too far away.”
I don’t hesitate, and scramble over in an ungraceful way I’m sure makes me look like an eager puppy. But I don’t care, because I am eager, and I’m not going to pretend otherwise.
He chuckles and pats his thigh. “Put your head on my lap and we’ll talk.”
I feel far too awake for this. Far too alert. It’s like the world has exploded before my very eyes and I want to do a thousand things at once. But it’s a chance to touch him, to be with him, so I lie on my back and put my head on his thigh and look up.
He shakes his head and brushes a strand of hair from my cheek. “Do you have to be so goddamn beautiful?”
I flush with pleasure, and laugh. “Um, sorry?”
He grins down. “You should be.” He puts his palm over my stomach and the muscles jump in response. “Do you have plans tomorrow?”
I shake my head. Even if I did, I’d break them.
“I’m off tomorrow, would you like to spend the day with me?”
“Yes, I’d love to.”
“Good.” His thumb traces my ribs. “Do you have any requests?”
“Nope, I just want to be with you.”
He brushes the underside of my breast. “That’s one of the things I like best about you. You lack artifice; you are absolutely clear and direct in your desires. And that can only help us as we move forward.”
“See, I would have thought that would be a bad thing.”
He shakes his head. “Never. Communication is key. I always want to know what you’re thinking.”
This confuses me, as it’s gotten me in trouble in my past relationships. “Even if you don’t like it. In my experience, the ego can’t always handle the bad stuff.”
His hand slides over my belly. “In the kind of relationships I like, there is no place for ego, on either side.”
My pulse gives a little flutter and I bite my lower lip. “And how do you see…that working?”
“We’ll take it very slow. We’ll talk. I will be clear when I expect something and you will tell me how you’re feeling. Even if those feelings are difficult to talk about.”
I nod. “Do you expect anything now?”
He raises a brow and looks down at me. “Would you like me to?”
My breath kicks up. “I don’t know.”
“Explain.”
My brow furrows as I try and process through my thoughts. I finally settle on my two most conflicting emotions. “Part of me wants to ignore it and pretend we’re two people exploring the possibility of something more. Like your average, normal, run-of-the-mill dating process. But another part of me wants to get it over with, to start seeing what it’s like, so I can stop wondering about it.”
“And what are you afraid of?”
My heart gives a small thump in my chest. I look away. Until he asked the question I hadn’t realized I was afraid of anything.
“It’s okay, Jillian,” he says, his tone soft and understanding.
I swallow hard. “I’m afraid I won’t like it, and it will be the beginning of the end. If we can pretend for a while, then I’ll have more time with you before it’s over.”
“Come here.” He helps me up and then he twists me. Gripping my hips, he indicates that he wants me to climb on top of him.
I straddle his lean hips and he pulls me close before brushing my hair away. He grips my neck and kisses me, just a soft brush of his mouth over mine. “I’m afraid of the exact same thing.”
The admission startles me. “You are?”
He nods. “I am. There are only two choices here. Those same choices are true in any relationship. You either give it everything you have, or you walk away. It’s really that simple. And that complicated. The choice is up to you.”
He’s right. We all keep our secrets locked away, slowly doling them out. Testing the acceptance or rejection and adjusting accordingly. The opportunity he’s giving me here is permission not to hide. To let him know me and to know him in return. There’s something honest and pure about it that I can appreciate. “I want it all.”
“Good. Me too.” He kisses me again. “So I’ll ask the question again. Do you want me to expect anything from you?”
I take a deep breath, feeling like I’m taking a giant step into the unknown. “Yes, I believe I do.”
Leo
I pride myself on my discipline. On my self-control.
But Jillian is testing every ounce of it and I’m so fucking hard, all I want to do is take.
She has no idea how gorgeous she is right now. Her hair is wild, her skin flushed, her lips full and eyes luminous. She’s straddling me and squirming against me, and all I can think about is the way she came.
It is an addicting sight. One I need to see again before I leave tonight.
I put my hands on her hips and she waits, her lips parted. She’s breathless in her anticipation of the unknown, of stepping over the line with me. As soon as I felt her shudder and climax my decision was made, for good, without hesitation. Right or wrong, the last remnants of hope we can put this behind us dies a quick death.
We’re walking this path. We might crash and burn, but there’s no turning back now. So that leaves only one option, I need to show her what it’s like to be with me.
She squirms again on my lap, and my fingers tighten. She lets out a soft moan and arches into my cock. “Do with me what you will.”
I meet her gaze. “That is a dangerous offer to make a man like me.”
I’ve seen women turn meek at a statement like that. Jillian is not one of those women. She puts her hands on my shoulders and rocks into me. “I think I like danger.”
I’m almost certain that’s true. I smile, and flick my gaze down her body. “Someday, probably sooner rather than later, you’re going to be loving and hating those words.”
Jillian’s not experienced with the game we’re playing and doesn’t have the good sense to be wary. “Sounds promising.” She tilts her head and her hair swings over her shoulder. “So what do you want from me?”
I already know what I’m going to ask of her. It’s simple and not hard, but it’s the first step in testing her mindset. In testing my ability to control her. “We’ll start easy.”
She gives a little twist and looks as excited as a kid in a candy store. “All right.”
I run my hands up and down the curve of her waist, brushing my thumbs over her nipples just to watch her pupils dilate, before coming to rest back on her hips. “It’s very simple. Anytime you want to come, you’ll ask me first.”
Her brows furrow. “What exactly does that mean?”
I smirk. “Exactly what you think it means.”
“When you say anytime…” she trails off.
I nod. “I mean anytime. You’re at work and need to take the edge off, you call me and ask. You wake up in the middle of the night, needy and wanting, you call or text me to ask. Any fucking time you want to get off, you need to ask me first.”
She blinks in rapid fire, and her tongue slips out over her bottom lip. She laughs, a nervous little titter I find completely adorable. “You’re kidding.”
I slide one hand up the curve of her spine and let my fingers tangle in her hair. I tug, not enough to hurt, and not like I’d do with a girl that was more experienced, but e
nough to catch her notice. “I can assure you, I’m not kidding.”
Her breath snags in her throat. “And if I don’t? Call you that is? It’s not like you’ll ever know.”
And that’s exactly why this is a test, because she’s right, if I’m not with her, she can lie and I’ll never be the wiser. The real question is will she lie and I’m ninety-eight percent sure she won’t. Not because I’ve convinced myself she’s submissive, but because she’s honest. If she agrees to do something, she’ll follow through.
Unless her needy pussy gets the best of her. Which, honestly, happens to even the best of girls.
I tilt my head. “Let me put that question back on you. Do you want to play at submission? Or do you want to actually see what it’s like?”
The corners of her mouth turn down and she shifts restlessly under my hands. “Asking…that’s part of it?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
There are a lot of reasons and some of those reasons she’ll have to determine for herself, but I can give her at least the basics. “At the most fundamental level it establishes ownership.” I push her hair behind her ear. “It gets you into the mindset that I control your body, not you.”
Her brows furrow. “And this is important to you?”
I can tell she thinks the idea is kind of stupid, even though she’s willing to try, but if there’s a submissive girl lurking anywhere inside her, she’ll start to crave it.
I nod. “It will be a good test.”
“Okay.” And then she grins, and laughs as a pretty blush fills out her cheeks and leaves me breathless. “You know, I don’t have to have orgasms at work. That’s just ridiculous.”
It’s a little challenge and I pick up the gauntlet and run with it. “When you’re calling me from the bathroom stall and begging me to come, I’ll be a nice guy and not throw the words in your face.”
She inhales sharply and just like that the air shifts between us.
I test the waters a little more. “I might say no though, just to make you suffer.”
Another quick intake and she squirms in my lap. At least I can be assured this turns her on. I squeeze her hips and rock her into my erection, straining at my zipper. “I want to watch you ride my fingers to orgasm so I have a crystal-clear image of what you’ll look like riding my cock.”
Sinful (Undone) Page 10