by Reeni Austin
Stunned, Marcy shook her head. "Ramon—"
"Shh." Ramon placed a finger against her lips to quiet her. Staring into her eyes, he shoved the suitcase off the bed and pulled her forward, his mouth locking on hers.
Their kiss was perfect. Better than familiar. Better than anything Ramon ever felt in his life.
But a moment later, her palms went to his shoulders, pushing him away.
CHAPTER 31
"What's wrong?" Ramon asked, dumbfounded and breathless. "You don't want me anymore?"
For the life of her, Marcy didn't know exactly why she pushed Ramon away.
Her eyes fixed on the sexy man, trying to remember what rose up in her a moment earlier that made her stop him. All she could think about now was running her fingers through his dark, curly hair, letting her hands work their way down his body as they ripped each others' clothes off…
But then it came back to her—a memory flooding her thoughts like a tidal wave.
The pain. His trust issues. All those women.
Leaving home to start a brand new life with a guy who didn't want to let her in. She'd moved out just in time. Staying longer meant she would've fallen in love with Ramon and there'd be no turning back.
But deep down, Marcy feared she was already there.
Rapidly, she shook her head. "I can't go through this again. You always find reasons to shut me out. It's too painful."
"I'll stop doing that."
"How am I supposed to believe you?" She shrugged, her mouth hanging open. "Do you know how terrible it made me feel when you told me you didn't trust me, then took up residence out back in that trailer?"
"I'll get rid of that trailer."
"No! Then you'll just find other places to go. My point is, you shut me out. Twice! And we'd only known each other a month!"
"I know. I'm sorry. I'm goin' through a lot right now." Ramon let out an exhausted sigh, pain flashing across his face. "Look, I'm new at this."
"New at what?"
He rolled his eyes, then said, "This relationship… thing," as if he had to force the words out.
"You're not new at this. You've had girlfriends before."
"Not like you," Ramon said with a shy grin. "Believe me, I'm new at this."
Marcy slumped down on the bed, facing away from him, her stomach tingling with nerves. She was new at this, too.
Ramon sat down beside her, gently curling an arm around her back. "I'm so sorry for how I've acted with you. I—"
"Do you love me, Ramon?" She looked into his eyes.
"Uh…" He blinked, then stammered, then blinked some more, his eyes darting around at nothing specific.
She waited patiently.
Finally, Ramon gazed straight ahead at the wall and said, "That's a strong word. And we haven't known each other that long."
"I know." She placed a hand on his knee. "But you want me to uproot my life and move eighteen hundred miles away for you when you're not sure how you feel about me. Does that sound smart to you?" She sighed. "I know it doesn't seem like I have a whole lot going on here. I don't have a job or a house of my own. But I have friends. I have some family. And I have a history in this city. It's my home. And I can't just move for—"
"Do you love me, Marcy?"
Marcy gulped. She glanced in his eyes once, then looked away. Weakly, she said, "My feelings were headed in that direction."
Ramon drew her close to his side. "Then come back with me."
"I can't. It hurts when I think about it."
Ramon pulled his arm away, turned his face to the floor, and stood. Softly, he said, "I should get goin', then." Making no eye contact with her, he left the room, dragging along as if she'd punched him.
Marcy took a breath and almost said, "Stay." But maybe he was right to leave. Break it off completely before they really got serious. After all, she was only being honest with him. The thought of moving just so they could break up again caused her more pain than she had told him. Maybe he understood, and that's why he needed to go.
She watched him leave the room, and with a thin layer of tears in her eyes, she stayed on the bed, listening for the sound of the front door opening.
But instead, she heard his footsteps enter her bedroom again.
Marcy wiped her eyes and rose to her feet.
Ramon's sad eyes bored into hers but he kept his distance. "No," he said. "I think about you all the damn time. You just had to put your mark all over my house with your cleanin' and your," he let out a heavy sigh, "lookin' so pretty and shit. Then there's my car. My truck. My cows. Memories of you all over the fuckin' place. You're everywhere I look whether you're really there or not." He stepped forward, his tone earnest. "Damn it, woman. If you won't come back with me, I guess I'm gonna have to come here for you."
Gasping, Marcy brought her hand to her mouth. "You mean, move here?"
"Eh…" Ramon grimaced. "No. Sorry. I just meant flyin' up here every weekend, at least." He shrugged, an easy smile spreading across his face. "And don't bother sayin' 'no' 'cause I'm gonna show up at your door this Friday night and knock till you let me in. Or till you call the cops on me." His smile disappeared. "Please don't call the cops on me."
Marcy laughed. Tears drifted down her cheeks when she blinked. It may not have been as grand a gesture as moving to New Jersey, but she knew for Ramon, this was monumental. He loved his ranch and his town. And he never took that much time away from work. In a shaky voice, she said, "I won't call the cops."
Ramon smiled. "Good." He walked up to her and placed his hands under her jaw, tilting her face up to his for a kiss. She was ready for him to throw her down on the bed, but he surprised her and pulled away.
"Sorry." He kissed her forehead and whispered into her hair, "Need to take things a little slower."
Marcy put her arms around his back. He was right, but she was still disappointed. "All right."
He kissed her forehead again. "Have you eaten?"
"No."
"Good. I'm hungry. Let's go to dinner. What are you in the mood for?"
Marcy tipped her head back, looking into his eyes. "Anything but Chinese."
* * *
The following Monday evening, Marcy opened her laptop to talk to Cara via Skype.
"It's so great to see you!" Cara said. "I know it's only been a few weeks but it feels like forever."
Marcy nodded. "I know. I miss you. Where are Victor and Isaac?"
"They went out for ice cream. They'll probably end up at Ramon's." Her eyebrows waggled. "Speaking of whom… how was your weekend?"
"Amazing," Marcy said with a dreamy sigh. "Too good to be true."
Cara laughed. "He told Victor today that he's gonna have to train him to do more work so he can start having four-day weekends to spend with you."
"Aww…" Marcy smiled, blushing. "I hope Victor's okay with that."
Nodding, Cara said, "He is. He likes to stay busy and he's glad to see Ramon happy."
"I hope I don't end up getting a job where I have to work weekends." Marcy frowned.
"Well, if you decide you wanna move here again I could really use your help."
"Yeah right. Another charity job?"
"No. Actually, I need your help organizing this house. You know I've never been good at that." Cara reached for something and held it up to the camera. "And there's something else…"
Marcy squinted, trying to see what Cara was holding. "Is that an ultrasound picture?"
"Yeah. I've been waiting to show this to you without Isaac around." Cara pointed at the picture. "I don't know if you can see it or not but there are two sacs. Oh, and Mom doesn't know about this yet. I'm gonna call her after we hang up."
"Two sacs?" Marcy gasped. "Does that mean you're having twins?"
"Yes!" Cara beamed.
Marcy let out a long squeal. "I can't believe it! Are you excited? What's Victor think?"
"He wants a big family, so he's thrilled. I'm happy… but maybe a little bit shocked." Cara gave her a ple
ading look. "So, now I have to set up a nursery for two babies. Please come help me."
"I'm sure there are other people you can pay to get you organized."
"But why should I do that when you need a job? And we need a lot of other help in addition to that. Victor's trying to get a handle on those ranches in Kernersville. He could use you over there, for sure. And of course… there's Ramon…"
"I'm just not ready yet. It's too soon and I'm not sure he knows what he wants."
With a sympathetic pout, Cara said, "I understand." Then her eyes lit up. "And by the way, Mom told me last week about her new matchmaking service idea. She said she already mentioned it to you."
"Mm-hmm." Marcy tried not to show Cara what a terrible idea she thought it was. "So, what do you think about it?"
"It's crazy but," Cara rolled her eyes, "she's really got her hopes up and I know better than to try to talk her out of it. If nothing else it'll keep her busy. Victor said it'll be a great way for her to write off her travel expenses when she visits, if she can find clients here in our area. She might even open an office here. And she's taking an online course."
"Online course? In matchmaking?"
"Yeah. It's a real thing." Laughing, Cara added, "I'm surprised she thinks she needs to take a course. She's already an 'expert.'" She used air quotes.
"I wonder if she really was right about me and Ramon." Marcy sighed. "I guess only time will tell."
* * *
The next night, Ramon sat behind his desk, holding an unopened manila envelope that held the results of a paternity test
Their attorneys suggested they each get a paternity test to see if they were a match with Henry. It was a precautionary measure in case the jury didn't believe Valeria's letter or Henry's story. Pictures showed Henry with Victor and Armando as children, and their own paternity could come into question as a result, depending on the case built against Henry.
Victor and Armando had already opened their test results, and the reports stated there was no match between their DNA and Henry's.
"I think we all know what mine's gonna say." Ramon fidgeted with the envelope. "This feels so stupid."
Victor shrugged, then said in a calm voice, "Just open it, Ramon. The results won't change anything. Trust me."
Ramon smirked at him. "If it won't change anything, then why do I have to open it?"
"It's a protective measure," Armando said. "That's all." He reached forward. "Here. I'll open it for you. We can call Henry in here if you want."
"No. I don't want him in here for this." Ramon inhaled deeply, willing his sadness away. He'd already shed too many tears behind closed doors this week. Knowing he couldn't get out of it, Ramon summoned his strength and ripped the envelope, then pulled out the report inside. Another deep breath. He squinted at the small type on the report as he read it. "What the hell's this mean? Combined paternity index…"
Victor said, "Just keep reading."
Ramon continued. "After Henry's name it says 'Probability of Paternity 99.99%.'"
Ramon went numb. The paper floated out of his hands to his desk and he quietly said, "Shit."
Even though this was the news he expected, seeing it so definitively made his stomach go sour. He stuck his elbows to his desk and tucked his head down, rubbing the back of his neck.
Victor and Armando, both with glassy eyes, glanced at each other as they rose from their chairs.
Without looking at them, Ramon lifted a hand, warning them to stay where they were.
They eased back down into their seats.
Victor said, "You know it doesn't matter, right?"
Ramon's head shot up. "Mama lied to me from the day I was born till the day she died. I'd say that matters."
"Look, man," Victor said. "None of us wanna believe anything bad about Mama. I stay up at night thinking about what happened all those years ago." He paused for a calming breath. "But if she'd told the truth, she might've gone to prison. And then what? We would've grown up without her."
Armando nodded, a glum expression on his face. "She did the best she could, Ramon. In spite of all this, she was still the best mother in the entire world. Don't let this make you hate her. She doesn't deserve that."
"I don't hate her." Ramon stared at the wall, dazed. "I just feel like an idiot. Living here all these years…" Tears filled his eyes but he paused, blinking until they were gone. In a weak tone that broke his brothers' hearts, Ramon added, "Henry knew. He always knew, even if Mama wouldn't let him talk about it. And I was around him every fuckin' day and I didn't know."
Victor leaned forward in his chair. "Do you really think it would've been different if you'd known? Henry treated all of us like sons. The best he knew how, at least." He paused, drawing his hand to his chest. "I love Isaac as my own son. And I hope to God he never questions that, even though he'll grow up knowing I'm not his biological father."
Ramon rolled his eyes. "That's completely different. Henry and Mama flat out lied to me. For years. Made a fool outta me."
Armando spoke up. "You know what, Ramon? I was actually a little disappointed when I read my report and saw I wasn't a match with Henry."
"That's ridiculous," Ramon said, snorting.
"I know." Armando nodded. "But I was still disappointed." He wiped a tear from his eye. "I guess I hoped Henry was lying about everything. It would've been pretty cool to have my father alive instead of…" he trailed off, his voice a little shaky when he spoke again. "You know what else? It sounds like Henry treated Mama a whole lot better than Papa ever did."
"Yes," Victor said. "Henry was good to all of us." He peered deep into Ramon's eyes. "He gave us better lives."
Armando added, "And paid his own money to send me and Victor to college. I'll always be grateful for that." He flashed Ramon a knowing smirk. "Some of us didn't have the privilege of turning down three different scholarships, you know?"
Ramon folded his arms across his chest and casually replied, "Yeah, yeah."
Victor said, "We're not saying Henry's perfect. This entire situation is beyond fucked up and none of us'll ever be the same. But we could've had it much worse. Best thing we can do is just move forward from this and not let it break us."
Groaning, Ramon placed his hands on his desk, his eyes weary. Their words were starting to sink in, but he was desperate to end this emotional discussion. "I take after Henry in so many ways. Shoulda figured it out a long time ago."
Armando shook his head. "No. You don't look like him, to me."
"Where do you think I got this height?" Ramon lifted his hands and looked down at his body. "But you guys are short."
Victor and Armando both snorted in protest at the same time. Then Victor said, "You're not that much taller than us."
"Yes I am." Ramon nodded. "I'm six-foot-three, like Henry. You guys are both, like, five-ten on a good day."
Armando rolled his eyes and said, "No, no…"
Victor said, "No, we're both exactly six feet tall. We can prove it."
Ramon chuckled as he wiped lingering tears of sadness from his eyes, thankful to find a way to distract himself from the pain and amuse himself. "Nah. Everyone knows Mexicans are short. But I'm only half Mexican and half whatever Henry is. So I'm tall."
Armando's jaw dropped as he let out a tiny chuckle. "You racist asshole!"
Ramon's hand hit the desk and he laughed so hard, they could barely understand him saying, "Remember how pissed you were when I outgrew you?"
Victor shook his head. "You may be taller but we can still kick your ass. Don't you forget it."
Laughing even harder, Ramon choked out, "Yeah right. You gonna send your limo drivers after me?"
Sighing, Victor looked at Armando, and they both grinned. Instinctively, they both knew it wasn't the right time to take offense. It was easier for him to laugh about it than cry. Their brother obviously needed this.
CHAPTER 32
Two months passed. Marcy bounced between temporary office assignments, working as a rec
eptionist. Her most recent assignment was to fill in for an employee who was out on sick leave. It had ended the prior week, and Marcy didn't have anything else lined up yet.
Ramon, of course, regularly tried to talk her into moving back to Turnbrook, but she wasn't ready.
It was Tuesday. Ramon had just returned that morning from a long weekend with Marcy, and he already missed her. He called her from his office the second he came home.
"Hello?" she answered.
"Hey. I miss you."
Marcy sighed, happily. "I miss you too." Then she inhaled a sharp breath. "And I have news!"
"What?"
"I got a job!"
Ramon's heart sank. If she had permanent employment, it would decrease the chances of her moving to Turnbrook. He muttered a deliberately unenthused, "Great. Where?"
"Luciana's. It's a boutique."
"A boutique? You mean, a retail shop?"
"Uh-huh."
Ramon paused, hoping she'd understand why he was about to be upset with her. "Retail. That means you'll have to work weekends. We'll never see each other."
"That's not true. They said I could take a weekend off here or there."
"I doubt it. Stores like that usually do most of their business on the weekend."
She groaned. "You don't know that. And it's the only permanent job I've found in… forever. Could you at least pretend like you're happy for me?"
"No. Do you wanna stop seeing me? Is that the real issue here?"
"No! You know better than that. I just want a permanent job."
"You have a permanent job here anytime you want it."
Marcy was silent.
"What's wrong?" Ramon asked. chuckling nervously. "You're that scared to be with me? You'd rather take some retail job and stay there than move back down here?"
Softly, Marcy said, "I didn't really think it through, I guess. I was just excited to get a job offer. It's been a while."