by Shana Festa
Much like vomit, maggots were another thing to add to my growing list of gross things Emma can’t handle. Once I had left a dish with leftover steak in the sink for a week. When I finally got around to washing it, it was crawling with maggots. My body gave an involuntary shudder as I remembered the scene. I dry heaved a few times, the sound coming out like hork hork. I backed away and counted to ten while I looked at the ceiling and gave myself a mental moment to calm my defiant stomach.
Adam poked his head through the window frame. "Hey, any day now. It’s not like there’s, oh I don’t know, zombies running rampant in the city trying to eat us, or anything. But hey, you just take your sweet time in there."
I muttered a quick suck it under my breath and unlocked the back door. They closed it quietly behind them, and the four of us stood crammed into the tiny room. Lowell, closest to the corpse, leaned over the body. "What the…hork hork."
Ha! Sucka! Justice had been served.
Seth put his ear to the door and we held our breath waiting for something to happen. When nothing did, he looked back at us and shrugged his shoulders. I knew the layout of the store and directed each man to a specific quadrant. We opened our backpacks and prepared to shop.
The first thing we saw when we opened the door was a body sitting upright against the adjacent wall. It let out one of their trademarked raspy moans and reached one hand up to us like he wanted help to stand. Yeah right, buddy, I’ll help you up. NOT.
Seth dispatched it quietly with his blade and we eased down the hallway. At least I now knew why boss man had locked himself in the small office. No other threats were visible as the hallway opened into the store. Unless, of course, you counted the busted-in front windows of the store. Man, we just couldn’t catch a break.
Seth made his funny hand signals at us. I’d watched Platoon enough times to know that he was pointing us in our respective directions. On high alert, we made our way through the aisles, bagging, not only what was on the list, but whatever other supplies could come in handy. A moving shadow at the front windows caught my attention and I ducked down out of sight. Peering over the shelf, I spotted a zombie shambling by the window. I frantically looked around the store and was relieved to see the others had taken cover as well. We would need to stay away from the front.
Of course, the blood pressure monitors were lining the front wall. "Damn it." Using the far wall for cover, I crept up and around the corner. I grabbed the first one I came to and was about to move back to the shadows when I saw Adam waving his hands at me. Fear was etched on his face and he motioned me to stay. I became one with the wall. My heart pounded so hard, I was sure whatever was just a few feet from me would hear it.
Adam relaxed and waved me on. Whatever it was, it had passed by like the last. Five feet away from the wall the machine wheels came to an abrupt halt and I lost my grip as it fell over. That damn machine was plugged into the wall. Who does that? I froze in fear, praying I hadn’t drawn any attention to us. If looks could kill, I’d have been a dead woman.
Three sets of eyes glared at me, and I just knew each of them was kicking themselves for letting me come. I gave them the shrugging oops, my bad face and tiptoed to the plug. Finally away from the window we came together at the hallway. We’d gotten everything on the list. I removed the monitor from its stand and tucked it into Lowell’s pretty pink pack.
Opening the back door, we found a clear path and made it back to the fence where earlier we’d had a good laugh at my expense. Déjà vu. We were winded again and stopped to catch our breath.
"What was that?" I asked
"What was what?" replied Adam.
"There it is again. It sounds like a growl." I turned to find a dog emerging from behind a tree two houses away. Four more dogs flanked the first. Their fur was matted and I could see the outline of ribs poking through. They growled again, this time in unison. This was no day at the dog park. This group was out for blood. I bet they saw a big T-bone when they looked at us.
"Oh, shit. Run. Head straight through, all the way to the boat."
And run we did. The pack was in hot pursuit. Thankfully, the two-house gap gave us a head start. The original group of corpses that had witnessed my graceful fall had stopped following us when we outran them. Now, however, they were directly in our path. We veered to the right and ran around the other side of the house. There were a few scattered loners in our path but we were running so fast they couldn’t get to us as we passed by. The dogs were closing the distance as we rounded the last house and jumped in the boat.
Adam set to work freeing the rope and we pushed off in time for the first of the dogs to reach us and jump in the water. The dog clawed at the side of the boat attempting to gain purchase and Lowell hit it with an oar. It fell beneath the water line and disappeared as we rowed away. The other three scattered back into the neighborhood as the undead began grabbing for them; yet another piece of good information. They went for animals as well as humans. Nothing was safe from these monsters. I made a mental note to watch Daphne at all times. I would not let her become zombie chow.
* * *
Chapter 21
Heaven Gets Another Angel
The next week was spent performing dry runs of the impending labor as a group. It would be all hands on deck when the moment finally arrived.
We were just finishing dinner when Noelle grabbed her abdomen and cried out in pain. She stood up and her pants were saturated with fluid. Her water had broke. I recalled a day long ago sitting at the beach with Brooke as she told me the story of her little brother, Mark. She had been out to dinner at Burger King when her mother’s water broke all over those plastic bench seats. I remembered being grossed out on behalf of the person who would inevitably have to clean it up.
Finn was amazing throughout the ordeal. He walked with her around the deck, rubbed her back when the pressure on her spine became too much to handle. After nearly six hours of walking, sitting, laying and every other anatomical position possible, her contractions were two minutes apart and it was time to push.
Finn held her hand and gave her words of encouragement. "I love you. You’ve got this, sweetheart."
Noelle screamed. She was sitting up in a recliner, pillows behind her head and her legs open on the footrest. Everyone had scrubbed clean using the soap retrieved on our adventure and dressed in yellow waterproof hospital gowns with those funny paper hats. We donned surgical gloves and our small cache of surgical instruments was laid out on the table beside us.
"Push, Noelle."
She cried out in pain, sweat glistened on her forehead. "It hurts."
"You’re doing great, Noelle. Give me a big push," I instructed.
"I can’t do it; it hurts too much."
"You’ve got this. Take a deep breath. Ready? Three. Two. One. Push!"
She clenched her teeth together and gave a strained push.
"Good. The baby's crowning. I see the head."
Finn moved down and looked, wide-eyed, between her legs. "Holy shit. I see it. Push, baby, you’re almost there."
I counted down again and yelled, "Push!" She gave one final pained scream and pushed. Finns eyes held his amazement as I pulled the baby's tiny form from Noelle. I raised the baby in my arms and she let out a shrill cry. "It’s a girl," I exclaimed, and the group cheered in unison.
Nancy clamped the cord like I had shown her; she placed two clamps on the umbilical cord to stop the blood flow. After a failed attempt to pry Finn’s attention from his new miracle, she cut the cord herself. Finn kissed his wife on the forehead. "We did it." He couldn’t take his eyes from his new beautiful baby girl. We were wiping her off, cleaning off the fluids of childbirth, when the monitor started to beep.
Noelle’s head had fallen back onto the pillows and was slowly drooping to the side. The alarms sounded at her falling heart rate.
"Noelle? Noelle, can you hear me?" I asked.
She didn’t stir.
I made my way to the head of the chair and p
ushed it back so she lay flat.
Finn was shouting his wife’s name, shaking her by the shoulders. "What’s happening? Why isn’t she answering? Noelle, wake up, please, baby, wake up."
"Get Finn and the baby out of here," I said.
Nancy scooped the baby from my arms and hurried out of the room. Lowell grabbed a fighting Finn and dragged him from the room in the other direction, assuring him everything would be okay.
"Stop! What’s happening to my wife? Noelle, I love you. Noelle! Somebody, please, just tell me what’s happening to my wife." I heard him yelling from behind the bedroom door.
"Meg, I need a BP."
Noelle was unresponsive. Her heart rate had fallen to twenty-seven and was steadily decreasing. I squeezed the bag of saline into her IV and watched the monitor. It still fell. The monitor gave a solid beep, telling me she was in a systole and no longer had a pulse. Meg reported the same results from the blood pressure.
She had drifted off peacefully after giving her final push. I wasn’t trained for this. I didn’t know how to save her. I saw the pool of blood growing between her legs. Blood loss had caused her pressure to fall below critical levels, and we didn’t have the capacity to transfuse her. I performed CPR until my strength gave out and I lost my balance; each compression added more blood to the puddle. We had lost her.
Pulling the surgical cap from my head, I looked up at Adam and shook my head. Meg gasped and ran crying from the room. I sat on the floor until Adam pulled me upright and held onto me for support. Seth covered Noelle with a sheet and the three of us stood vigil.
I looked at the bedroom door that held Finn. My vision tunneled and the hallway looked like it stretched on for miles. I began the long walk to give him the news of his wife’s demise.
* * *
I found Finn pacing at the back of the room when I opened the door. Lowell had been guarding the exit like a night club bouncer. The two showed signs that they had been struggling. Lowell looked like he’d been used as a punching bag, and Finn’s knuckles were bloodied.
Entering the room, I approached Finn cautiously. "Finn."
"If I don’t get to go in there right now, I swear to God I’m going to hurt someone. You can’t keep me from my wife. I need to see her."
"Finn, calm down."
"Fuck you and your calm down. That animal dragged me out of there. I haven’t gotten to see my baby, and I want to be with my wife." He was breathing heavy, spitting out words in anger.
"Finn, your baby is fine. She’s healthy, and she’s beautiful. You can see her soon. Nancy is getting her cleaned up for you. I just need you to calm down."
He shouted back at me "I. Am. Calm." Taking a deep breath, he said more sedately. "I’m calm, Emma. I just need to be with my wife." He moved to step around me, and I blocked his path.
"I’m sorry, Finn. Noelle lost a lot of blood, causing her vitals to bottom out. I did everything I could to get her back."
"Okay…but she’s okay now, right?"
I shook my head. "We lost her, Finn. The ordeal was too hard on her body." I explained everything we had done to try and save her. Finn’s face went slack and he covered his face. He slid down the wall and cried for the loss of his soul mate. His fists pounded against his head as he wailed.
I reached out to put my hand on his shoulder, and he shoved me away. "Get the fuck away from me," he spat. "Leave me alone, all of you, get the fuck out." We gave him his space, closing the door behind us as we left the room.
When we returned to the makeshift birthing room, the baby lay sleeping in Nancy’s arms. This angelic bundle of joy we had all been waiting for. Today should have been one of celebration. The group needed it. We went through the motions of cleaning around Noelle’s limp body. No one talking, each of us stuck in our own heads.
Her body remained in the chair, waiting for Finn to say his goodbyes. He didn’t come out of the room. All had been quiet behind the door, and I began to worry for him until it slowly opened and Finn’s silhouette came into view. He approached the group apprehensively, eyes red and puffy from tears. As he removed the sheet from Noelle’s face, he picked up her hand, brought it to his lips and brushed soft kisses across her knuckles. Then he knelt there, holding her hand and stroking her hair. He wept against her neck as he whispered words into her ear, too hushed for us to hear. His touch was gentle and loving. There wasn’t a dry eye among us; even the soldiers, trained to shove down their emotion, cried outright for Finn’s loss.
* * *
We wrapped Noelle in the sheet and carried her body up to the deck. It was still dark, the morning sun not yet peeking through the gloom. Finn held his baby girl as he stood silent over his wife’s corpse and mourned. No amount of consoling would ease this man’s pain. He was a broken shell of what he once was. The light in his eyes had gone out. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one concerned about his ability to care for his child in his current state.
Walking to him, I put one hand on his shoulder and rubbed the side of the newborns face with the other. He jerked away as if my touch burned him. "Get away from us," he barked at me. His face was a muddled distortion of anger and pain, and it was all directed at me. I realized then that he blamed me for his wife’s death. Not that I could blame him; I felt responsible. Logically I knew the guilt was wrong, I had done all I could. Semantics weren’t enough to rid me of the suffocating culpability I harbored. "Leave me alone, all of you."
Against our better judgment we left him on deck with what was left of his family. Nancy took Gabby into their room, most likely to try to coax her to sleep. The rest of us sat at the kitchen table, not talking. Meg leaned her head on my shoulder, and I knew she had fallen asleep by the change in her breathing.
The sun made its first appearance on the new day. As its rays shone down onto the blighted land, I caught movement out the window and to my right.
"No, Finn," I gasped and jumped out of my seat. The sudden jostling woke Meg and she let out a strangled scream. The men followed my gaze and were out of their seats as well, running up the stairs and shouting for Finn to stop. Finn had placed Noelle's body into the rowboat and faced us as he dug oars into water, increasing the distance between us. His newborn child lay swaddled in blankets at the front of the little craft.
"Finn, what are you doing?"
A cold stare that would have turned water to ice was his only response. The baby’s shrill cry drew the attention of the closest zombies and their efforts increased in fervor as the boat glided by.
We watched helplessly as he paddled himself past the ever-present group of hungry fiends and away from the houseboat. Our shouts and pleas for him to stop fell on deaf ears, and we watched as the group of undead began getting more animated. The prospect of living flesh worked them into a frenzy and they pushed at the end of the dock and fell into the water to get to their meal.
Finn rowed around the bend and was gone from sight. He was lost to us. He’d checked out the moment I told him of his wife’s fate. We waited on deck for hours in hopes of seeing his boat coming back to us. One by one we went back down into the cabins. Meg came last when she gave up hope of his return.
Life went on. Surprisingly, no one spoke of Finn’s departure after that first day. We had all lost people we cared about, but this loss felt foreign to us because the ending hadn’t come with a bloody death. Finn had chosen to leave our safe haven. He had put himself and his child in harm’s way. No matter how bad things were, I just couldn’t reconcile his decision.
* * *
Chapter 22
Sneaky Bastard
It didn’t take long for us to figure out another foraging trip had to be made, five days to be exact. Our supplies were dwindling. We needed water if we planned on surviving. This was how our new life was going to be. Living meant putting ourselves back in harm’s way.
The sun had reached its zenith when the three men left. With no other means to make the trip, they were forced to take the Jet Ski. It was meant for two, but the three
men were able to fit. Their plan was to search for another small craft along the way so they could fit supplies, and allow us a means to leave the boat without having to use precious fuel or take a swim. They readied themselves for departure, each checking their weapons and reloading magazines.
Adam took me by the arm and led me into the galley. "I need to talk to you." He stood before me, his hand still holding my arm. "I know you feel what’s happening between us, and I know you’ve been avoiding me because you’re afraid to let go of Jake."
"Stop, Adam. Don’t say anything else."
He grabbed the sides of my face. His eyes burned with intensity and it felt like they would bore holes straight through me like a laser. "Cut the crap, Emma. We got lucky last time out there. What if our luck runs out this time?"
That made me mad. "First of all, Adam, I am not afraid to let Jake go, I refuse to. And whatever feelings I do or do not have toward you don’t matter. In fact, throwing them at me and then trying to guilt me into saying them back by giving me the ‘I may not return’ speech is a dick move." I shoved his hands off my face and turned to stalk away.
"You’re right," he said. "It is a dick move, but I don’t know how else to do it. I care about you. More than a friend and more than I have any right to. Jesus, I hope Jake is alive, too. It doesn’t change the fact that I’ve fallen in love with you."
"Be safe out there, Adam. Make sure you come back." I walked away from him and pushed by Meg who’d heard the entire conversation. Adam, Lowell, and Seth cast off and paddled out of view. After my awkward exchange with Adam, I planted myself in a beach chair on the upper deck and stared out into the water. Meg slid into the seat next to mine.