CHASING LIFE

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CHASING LIFE Page 4

by Steve Jovanoski


  ‘Julia would want you to do it, mate. I know it,’ Mike said, as if reminiscing. Dave gave Mike a relieved smile.

  ‘Thanks, mate. I appreciate the support,’ he looked pointedly at Amy.

  ‘Shut up, you!’ Amy snapped at Mike.

  ‘Amy,’ Dave said, ‘I was married to Julia for only a few years, but we were together for eight. I can’t help but think about her every day. It’s been over three years now, and not much has changed. Everything in the house reminded me of her.’

  ‘So it is because of Julia!’ Amy said triumphantly.

  Dave sighed and rubbed his forehead, feeling as though he were being interrogated. ‘It is and it isn’t. I’m thirty-five and the future I planned has been obliterated. I’ve lost a passion for my career and my whole life, for fuck’s sake,’ the words were tumbling out. ‘I have no interest in anything, not one thing. I’ve got myself into a rut and have to take a risk. I can’t think about the past for the rest of my life, can I? I’m hoping this trip will kick-start things, and maybe I’ll find someone who’s not as messed up as I am. I’ll settle for a restaurant job washing dishes to keep me from blowing my savings and even learn another language while I’m there. Going away just feels right. And it doesn’t matter in which direction I’m going, as long as I find something worthwhile on the way, a bit of happiness and a new outlook in life.’ Dave stopped to compose himself.

  ‘Okay, mate,’ Mike reassured him. ‘We’ll be here when you get back. To be honest, I wish I could come with you.’

  ‘I just want to make sure you’ve thought this through properly.’ Amy gave up her prodding, and they all sipped their coffees at the same moment, as if timing it on purpose. Their eyes drifted in different directions, sifting through their thoughts for something appropriate to say.

  ‘Have you told your folks?’ Amy asked.

  ‘I told them I was going on a long holiday. I didn’t want them to worry. I’ll call them when I’m there anyway.’

  ‘What time is your flight?’ Mike asked.

  ‘Tonight at six.’

  ‘Do you need a lift?’

  ‘I’ll take a taxi.’

  ‘How long in Hong Kong?’

  ‘Don’t know.’

  ‘And then?’

  ‘Don’t know.’

  ‘Got a hotel?’

  ‘Nope. I’ll find something when I get there.’

  ‘Ticket and passport all good?’

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘Packed?’

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘Ready for a massage and a bit of a happy ending?’

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘Oh, shut up will you?’ Amy interrupted the guys’ volley, punching the closest one to her, which was Mike again. They all broke into a light-hearted laugh, savouring every minute they remained in the café. Each dreaded the moment they’d have to say goodbye and allow life to take them in different directions.

  Dave looked at his watch and bit his lip. His heart was full of emotions ranging from fear and anxiety to excitement.

  ‘Is it time?’ Amy asked, noticing him looking anxiously at his watch.

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘All right then. Let’s pay the bill and say goodbye outside.’

  After Dave paid the bill, they all walked outside in the cold air. He gave a last glance at the crowded café and its distinctive sign.

  ‘What’s with the goofy grin on your face?’ Mike asked.

  ‘Don’t know. I just wonder if I’ll miss this place.’

  ‘Yeah, right. Come here.’ The big man embraced his friend and held him tight before letting him go. ‘Look after yourself, stay safe and come back to us, okay? And make sure you email any chance you get. I want the X-rated version by the way. Send everyone else all the touristy crap.’

  ‘Hey, I want the X-rated version too,’ Amy embraced Dave until he felt the warmth of her body. She then turned away, dabbing her eyes. Mike placed his arm around her and held her beside him.

  ‘I’ll see you guys again. Don’t worry—I’ll be back.’ Dave walked off and waved.

  ‘You’d better,’ Mike answered. He and Amy stood together, watching their childhood friend walk away.

  Chapter 6

  Dave arrived at the airport wheeling a small suitcase with one hand and carrying the printout of a barcoded e-ticket in the other. He was fascinated that such an important undertaking could come down to a simple barcode. New Zealand was as far as he’d ever travelled before, and here he was now with a one-way ticket to Hong Kong. Where to thereafter? It didn’t matter. He was hoping for surprises. He’d resolved to be open-minded and tackle anything that came his way. Moving in a direction made him feel alive again, he felt in control. It was a feeling that was taken from him a long time ago. There was a new life and happiness awaiting him out there, and he would find it. He’d finally taken off his wedding ring and put it away for good.

  Once his luggage was checked in, Dave tried to relax, keeping an eye on flight-number updates on the board. The airport was quiet. Dark-suited business travellers on domestic flights rushed to the security gates, dumping empty coffee cups on the way. International travellers fidgeted nervously while watching the countdown to their departure. He studied the people around him, wondering what stories had brought them there.

  He couldn’t help but notice the young couple shedding tears next to him. They embraced as though they would never see each other again, relishing every minute left. The young man ran his fingers gently through his partner’s hair and whispered consolations. She in turn caressed his face and nodded. Dave thought again of the fact that he and Julia had never made an overseas trip together. It was just one of so many unfulfilled plans.

  Eventually he went through security and wandered around the gate area. When boarding for his flight was announced, anxiety mixed with excitement prompted him to line up quickly. After his ticket’s barcode was scanned, he entered the aerobridge. There was no turning back now. Strapped in his aisle seat with a grin on his face, Dave gave silent thanks that Brian’s getting fired had given him the courage to abandon his old routine. The procrastination and uncertainty leading up to this point faded away. Other passengers filed into the plane and stowed their carry-on belongings while the crew prepared for take-off. Twenty minutes later, the captain announced their departure. The enormous jet engines of the A380 propelled the plane down the runway and lifted it off the ground until it soared into a clear sky.

  The passenger next to Dave was an older man engrossed in a book. He had white hair and a square jaw and looked very used to international travel. That suited Dave just fine. A conversation with an inquisitive stranger right now would distract him from enjoying the moment. It had been a long time since he’d allowed himself to let go. He still had a lot of anxious energy and tried to make himself as comfortable as possible in the economy-class seat.

  Shifting awkwardly in his seat, he got his wallet from his pocket and took out Julia’s letter. He couldn’t bear to read it just then, but still skimmed over the words. He felt a pang of sadness deep in his chest and put it back hurriedly. In the years since her death, he’d seen Julia’s face everywhere. He saw her in a crowded shopping mall and he saw her driving by. It wasn’t Julia, of course. It was just his grief-stricken mind playing tricks on him. At times, he’d find himself doodling on a piece of paper, and he’d look down on it to see he’d written her name over and over again, without even realising it. When a flight attendant walked by, he asked for a glass of wine and shortly thereafter drifted off to sleep.

  A few hours passed and Dave was awakened by another flight attendant, this one an Asian woman with a cover girl smile. She gave him a gentle nudge and told him that the lunch would soon be served. He looked around as if to reassure himself he was still on the plane. Dave stretched his arms and yawned, feeling all the tension in his body loosen up.

  ‘Let’s hope,’ the older passenger on Dave’s left said, putting away his book, ‘that the meal on this flight is palatable. I had
gas for a whole week from my last flight.’ He leaned in Dave’s direction. Dave noticed he was wearing a floral shirt with khaki pants and his fingers were covered in gold rings. The man’s drawl suggested he might be an American from the South, Dave guessed. Not that he was an expert on American accents, but he’d seen enough movies to know.

  ‘I hope so too,’ Dave replied affably.

  ‘So where are you from?’ the man asked.

  ‘Melbourne, Australia.’

  ‘Oh, an Aussie. I’ve never been to Australia.’

  ‘But didn’t you board in Melbourne?’ Dave inquired.

  ‘I was in transit from New Zealand. I’m on my way to Paris via Hong Kong and then back to New Zealand or maybe even Tahiti. I’m not sure yet, I tend to travel the world and party like crazy.’ In a complete non sequitur, the traveller asked, ‘And you’re married? A girlfriend perhaps?’

  ‘Nope, I’m on my own. You’re from the South, I take it?’ Dave added, trying to get away from the topic of his marital status.

  ‘Yeah, Alabama. The name’s Earl.’

  ‘Mine’s Dave. Nice to meet you,’ he said, shaking hands. ‘Are you on business or a holiday?’

  ‘I’m retired. I just travel these days. How about you?’

  ‘Holiday to Hong Kong,’ Dave replied.

  ‘A great place! How long are you staying?’

  ‘Don’t know.’

  ‘Where are you staying?’

  ‘I’ve no idea. I’ll figure it out when I get there. Can you recommend any accommodations for a first-time visitor?’ Dave asked.

  Earl laughed. ‘You sure got a casual approach to travellin’! Try the Ragan Hotel. It’s in Wan Chai, close to Times Square and not too expensive.’

  ‘Thanks, I will.’

  ‘That’s interesting, an open-ended journey,’ Earl declared with a smile. ‘I love Thailand and Cambodia. I’ve been there many times, but Southeast Asia just keeps drawing me back.’ Earl patted Dave’s arm.

  ‘I’m looking for a new adventure I guess, and I know it’s out there if you’re willing to chase after it,’ Dave said.

  Just then, the beautiful Asian flight attendant was passing down the aisle and Earl waved a hand in her direction. As she approached, he said to Dave: ‘You won’t be bored in Hong Kong, trust me. Let’s get us some drinks.’ Earl took the liberty of ordering a bottle of red.

  ‘So how did you find New Zealand, Earl?’ Dave asked as their bottle of wine was brought to them.

  ‘Very sheepish!’ Earl laughed, slapping Dave playfully on the arm. ‘I’m joking. It’s a great place. I bought this watch there. Look, it hardly works, just like New Zealanders.’

  They conversed further while finishing their first glass of wine. Earl proposed another. Dave was feeling a little drowsy but agreed—at least the conversation passed the time.

  ‘Now Dave,’ began Earl, his drawl getting drawlier as he imbibed more alcohol, ‘you’re going to Hong Kong, but you have no idea why or for how long. Is that right?’

  ‘Yep.’

  ‘And I thought I was crazy. Good for you! Live life as it comes; get in the cosmic flow, man.’ Earl slapped him on the forearm again.

  ‘What about you? How is it that you’re travelling alone?’ Dave asked.

  ‘I used to own all sorts of businesses,’ Earl replied. ‘I sold the last one not long ago and retired. Now I travel as often as possible. I should have done it years ago. You delay and keep working, thinking that you should enjoy life later or with a partner. When you look back and see that you’ve put your whole life on hold, you realise there is no other time. Your hair turns white, and you’ve gained an extra pound for each year you’ve delayed. And then, you keep moving to stop yourself from looking back. That’s all you can do.’ Earl frowned down at his gut, but his eyes weren’t looking there. Within a flash, his face brightened and turned to Dave, ‘You know what? Let’s have something harder,’ he said and pressed the service button.

  ‘Yes sir?’ a male attendant with a soft Asian accent said upon coming to their seats.

  ‘My friend and I,’ slurred Earl, ‘would like scotch, please.’

  ‘Sir, I think you’ve had a bit too much,’ the attendant answered politely.

  ‘Just give us the fucking drinks!’ Earl exploded. ‘Wait, I’m sorry. My friend here is getting married and we’re having a small celebration. We won’t disturb anyone, and I promise it’ll be our last one.’

  The flight attendant hesitated for a moment and looked at Dave, who smiled back and struggled to maintain his composure. ‘All right,’ the attendant said, ‘but this will be the last one.’

  ‘Thank you, sir. I am grateful beyond words,’ Earl replied, feigning deep sincerity and watching the young man walk toward the drinks cart.

  ‘You sneaky bastard,’ Dave said, grinning.

  ‘Shh. He’s coming back.’ The man wheeled the cart over and poured their drinks. ‘Thank you, my man and cheers to you.’ Earl raised his glass and took a sip. The flight attendant ignored him and moved toward an adjacent row of passengers.

  ‘Grab that bottle,’ Earl hissed to Dave.

  ‘What?’

  ‘The scotch bottle, quick that one, he’s not looking,’ Earl pointed. Dave outstretched his arm and grabbed the bottle. The flight attendant was too busy serving to notice Dave filling their cups full. The bottle was half empty when he returned it back in its place.

  ‘We should have kept it,’ Earl said and they burst out in laughter like a couple of barflies.

  ‘It’s lights out for me, Earl,’ Dave said and looked down at the empty cup that seemed to distort and blur. ‘I’m going to catch up on some sleep, I think.’ Dave plugged in his earphones and scanned through the music channels, tucking his arms under a blanket.

  ‘Yeah, that sounds like a good idea,’ Earl muttered. He adjusted his seat and put on an eye mask. In a matter of minutes he was snoring.

  Six hours later the plane landed at Hong Kong International Airport. Dave felt horrible. Arriving at his first destination with a hangover was not a smart move. Earl, on the other hand, seemed wholly unaffected.

  ‘It’s been a pleasure getting drunk with you, Dave. Don’t be surprised if we bump into each other again. It’s a small world.’ The last few words put a warm smile on the American’s face, as if remembering a fond moment from a distant past.

  ‘Same here, Earl and have a safe trip home.’ The two men shook hands.

  ‘Enjoy Hong Kong, every bit of it,’ Earl called out and chuckled while walking away. They were off in separate directions, one through transit and the other to the arrivals gate.

  Earl seemed like a man bent on getting everything out of life and had fun on the way. However, Dave could tell there was a lot more to him. Only a seasoned drinker recovered as easily as Earl. He felt the man’s regret for lost time and the words resonated a warning for Dave. Earl was a good and likable character. But Dave didn’t want to end up like him: older, fatter and flying all over the world alone and regretting the opportunities he’d missed. There was something about him that Dave didn’t get.

  As Dave merged with the bustling crowd, he looked around and took in the sight. At five foot eleven, slim, with short dark hair and a western European complexion, Dave thought he’d stick out like a typical foreigner in an Asian city. He wasn’t the most attractive man; mid-range, he considered himself. He had a concave nose that was a little rounded on the end, and blue eyes that squinted when he laughed. He usually blended into the crowd well, and there was no outstanding feature about him, except perhaps for his smile and thick hair. Julia used to say he had a cheeky smile. She found it adorable and always made him blush like a schoolgirl when she made a point of it. People thought he’d be lighter skinned on account of his Dutch heritage. But his father had discovered that his great-grandfather married a Jewish girl and the lineage changed course. He was named David as homage to her.

  In his early twenties, when he met Julia, Dave had been devoted to athlet
ics and swimming. In those days, he’d been super-fit. One thing about swimming, however, was that he was prone to stacking on kilos once the training regimes stopped. The only time that he’d lost weight in his adult life was during Julia’s sickness. Now, he was at eighty-eight kilos and his belly gave his shirts a rounded shape. Sucking it in just wasn’t working and he’d finally resolved to develop an interest in his appearance again. He’d promised himself to change his eating habits. His plan was to stick to healthy meals and hold off on junk food.

  Dave had come to Hong Kong with no expectations and was already surprised to see the mix of nationalities at the airport. It was teeming with people, a hive of humanity. Besides being racially diverse, a range of classes was evident by the clothing people wore. It ran the gamut from the attire of people from poorer regions of Asia such as Vietnam and Cambodia, to the fashionable dress of mainland Chinese girls carrying shopping bags emblazoned with luxury brand names. While walking through the airport, Dave also picked up the multilingual chatter of young Italian backpackers, German businessmen, African athletes and Buddhist monks of indeterminate origin. It was as if the United Nations had gathered in a small part of the world, going about their business.

  He walked into a magazine store and browsed over the books, newspapers and magazines lining the shelves. About half of them were in English, not foreign enough, he thought. His eyes landed on the South China Morning Post and read the headlines, China’s growth slowing but still at eight percent. A photo showed a row of skyscrapers with cranes sticking out of them like TV antennas trying to catch the right signal. On another, China’s upper and middle class on the rise, youth spending more and not saving. Just underneath it, president Hu Jintao’s term to finish in the following year, Xi Jinping rumoured to replace him. These were strangers’ names without meaning to Dave. But over a billion people would surely know who they are. That number alone was mind blowing.

 

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