by Carol May
John places his hand on my arm as he asks, “Charli, are you alright?”
Turning my sad eyes away from the elevator, I meet his gaze. Probably a little snippier than I intended, I answer, "Yes, I have to be don’t I? You can see he has already moved on.”
Pointing to the sofa, I say, “Why don’t you wait here for me while I grab a few things. It shouldn’t take long. I’ll hurry.” Turning, I walk up the steps and into what was once our bedroom. Looking around the room, my eyes do not land on the glass wall overlooking the ocean but instead the rumpled unmade bed. My eyes are immediately drawn to what was once my side of the bed. That's when the objects on my night stand, catch my eye. It is my earrings, along with the wine glass I sat there almost a week ago. At least, I think it is the same glass. I remember having a drink that fateful night. What in the world? His cleaning crew, must be slipping. Turning away, I walk into the closet as I swallow the bile that has risen up into my throat. How could I have been so naive?
The drive to Salina, Kansas is really long from Miami, a thousand plus miles. We could
do that taking turns driving but we both think that is too much. If we tried driving all that without any stopovers we would kill each other of that I have no doubt. That doesn’t mean we don’t love each other, it just means we can’t be in a confined space for that long.
“John, can I use your phone?”
“Sure, you can but why don’t you use your own?”
I don’t have one.” I say looking out the window of this rental car as the pine trees zip by. I have absolutely no idea where we are except we are somewhere in southern Georgia.
Glancing over at me, I detect a hint of cynicism in his voice “What do you mean you don’t have one? Of course you do. I’ve called you. Stop it.”
“Stop what?” I ask since I have absolutely no idea what he is talking about. “Playing with your hair. You know that is your tell. You used to always do that when you didn’t want to answer truthfully about something. You get fidgety. It always starts with your hair or it use to start with your hair.”
With a puff, I begin, “I threw it in a dumpster. I know, it was really stupid of me.” As emotionless as I have ever heard him speak, John asks, “You threw it in a dumpster?”
“Yes. Well, I stepped on it a couple of times with the heel of my shoe first.” I sit staring straight ahead not wanting to say anything else. Taking a quick glance out of the corner of my eye, I see a big smile on his face. I look over. He looks almost as if he is about to bust out into laughter.
“Ok, what is so funny?” Erasing the smile, he is trying to be serious but I know him better than that. "Ah, I was just imagining you stomping on your cellular device. Obviously, I wasn’t there but I can just see you, bringing your foot down onto it multiple times. Cause once just wouldn’t be enough for you. If I know my sister there were a whole lot of four letter words flying.”
Smiling, “I see your point. I forgot to tell you, I had heels on. I had already had a few drinks.”
Grimacing, “Ooo, that just makes the picture worse. Yeah, help yourself to my phone but I know we’ll need to get you one before we get home.”
Nodding, and with a small smile, I pick up his phone. “You know you can get a newer one of these?”
“Damn, you sound like Amber. My phone works just fine, thank you.”
“Amber? Who’s Amber?”
“Someone, I’ve been seeing off and on for a couple of months.” Seeing my opportunity to get under his skin just a little, holding his phone up in the air I say, “I want to text someone. Do you think it can handle it?”
“Forever the smart ass. Some things never change.”
Going home for a-while. This is John’s number.
I really don’t know what to say to Lana. I know I am abandoning her and Supreme Corporate Travel but I also know this past week has caused some issues to surface that I thought were long ago resolved. The only way I can put them to rest is to return to the place where it all began.
K… How r... u? I’m worried. Take as long as u need. We will b here.
THX Will be in touch.
As I hand John back his phone, suddenly I am so tired. The horror of this past week begins to sink in. Laying my head back on the headrest, the silent river of sorrow flows freely down my cheeks.
Somewhere around Atlanta, we stop for the night. We also find a cellular store and I get a new phone. Walking back to our rooms, I see a familiar GlynisRun delivery truck. “No!” I yell causing people to stop and look at me as if I had gone off the deep end of a very high cliff.
With a concerned look I haven’t seen in many years John asks, “What’s wrong with you? Are you alright?”
I stand just watching that familiar navy and gold lettering with the green rolling hills zip by me. How can I ever survive? Will I always feel like I have been kicked in the stomach when those green trucks go by? I watch as it moves down the street out of sight. Turning, I look at John, “I am so sorry I lost it. It’s just that truck reminds me of someone.” With a tear in my eye, I smile feebly at my big brother.
“Charli, as long as you’re ok, you can yell all you want in the middle of this street.” I can detect just a hint of sarcasm when he adds, “Hell, you can even stand on my shoulders if you feel the need.”
“Ah, yes and that would probably get us both carted away to the loony bin.” I know he is trying to make me smile. He is doing a decent job, it’s just the smile doesn’t last for long.
Houston
“Houston, what do you mean someone has been in your apartment? I’ll be right up. I just parked in the garage but I’m on my way.”
“Jeff, get over to 303 immediately. Someone has been in Houston’s place.”
“What do you mean, Nash? How could someone get into his place? Is he alright?”
“I have no idea what has happened or how anyone could get into it. That place has a lot of security. He just phoned me. I am thankful now that we went out on his boat for a few days to try to help him get his head on straight. Man, he could have been there.”
Stepping out of the foyer into the main room, Nash looks around finding no evidence of anyone being inside. Taking the steps two at a time, as he calls out, “Houston, where are you? Are you sure someone has been in here? I don’t see any signs of a break-in.”
Stepping into the hall, Houston replies, “I believe you will change your mind once you see this. Yes I am fine. Come in here.”
Entering the room with him Nash stands surveying the area. “What in the devil?” Looking around the room, he continues, “Houston have you lost it, man? The only thing I see is an unmade bed.” With a childlike mocking voice, Nash asks, “Has someone been sleeping in your bed?”
“Follow me, smartass.”
Following Houston out of the bedroom, both men just stand there. Nash is attempting to take it all in. “What in the world?”
“Now, do you believe someone has been in my place?”
Shaking his head, Nash replies, “I never doubted you when you said someone had been in here but I didn’t expect to find this.” Standing here, taking it all in, Nash finally breaks the silence, “Well, I suppose I need to let Jeff know you are alright.” Walking out of the room, Nash stops, puts on a rubber glove then bends over to pick up a pair of scissors. Looking back at Houston, he says, “I suppose I found the weapon.”
Standing looking at the mess in his closet, Houston is lost as to why anyone would destroy all of Charli’s things even down to her accessories. Looking at the three thousand dollar pair of shoes with the heels broken off, Houston shakes his head. Every item that belonged to her is lying in ruin.
“I love ya sis but let me tell you, three days in the car with you is more than enough. I am glad to be home. Come on in. You can have the room over here. It has its own bath and is pretty private. Come and go as you like but I have got to get back to the office tomorrow. Charli, I don’t know what happened but I want you to know you can stay as long as
you like or until we can’t take another minute of each other.”
“Thanks, for everything. I know it was a lot to ask you to come and get me. I also know I owe you some explanations but I’m not ready to talk just yet.” Hugging him as I walk into the bedroom, it’s nice to know I actually have a place to go. Sitting down on the bed, I hop back up quickly and head for the shower.
Stretching out on the bed in John’s spare room, my mind begins to drift. I think about Houston and wonder if he is still in Miami. It has been almost two weeks since my world fell apart. Since I found out he is married. Turning into my pillow, I cry myself to sleep just like I have these last nights.
Day ten post Houston. I called the office this morning. I must admit it was good to hear Joan’s voice. I didn’t realize how much I missed her. She is going to send everything off the top of my desk to me here at my brother’s house. I can only imagine what will be in that package. Eek. John is being really great but his life must get back to normal.
I am sure this Amber he seems to talk quite a bit about every minute he is off is beginning to hate me . For some reason, he thinks he has to “sister sit” me. At least that is what I have lovingly begun to call his version of staying right beside me when he’s not working. I think the only way his life can resume is for me to get back to my life. So, work it is. I have been disconnected from everything. I could have used John’s computer but it is just about as outdated as his cell phone, so why risk it? I wouldn’t want the death of his old system to be another thing that is my fault.
Chapter 5
Houston
“Welcome aboard, sir. We have clear weather all the way to Eagle County Airport, our estimated flight time is three hours and forty five minutes. Your car will be waiting at the airport so your total travel time I believe will be approximately 4:45 to your ski lodge in Breckenridge.”
“Thank you Patrick. Good to be aboard. How are Michelle and the kids?”
“They are doing alright, thanks for asking sir.”
“How was this round of chemo?”
“She finished her last round and we are waiting for results.”
“If you need the time be sure to take it. You need to be there with Michelle. It can’t be easy for her, you being away and she is going through this with little Parker by herself.”
“Thank you sir, I have taken a few days. It has been pretty rough on her I have to admit.”
“Sir, this is Amanda. She will be your flight attendant.”
“Amanda, I will be working most of the time, I don’t expect to require a great deal. Are either Nash or Jeff on board?” “Yes Sir, Nash is in the back, I believe.”
“Thank you. Oh Amanda, I would like a scotch, Glen Fiddich if you have it.”
“Yes, sir. Right away. I am sure we have a bottle of it. We make every effort to keep bottles of your favorite brands. I believe that is your preference for scotch, if I am not mistaken.”
“You are correct, it is my favorite brand.”
Heading to the back of the plane, as Nash is exiting the lavatory, I say, “I’m just going to change out of these pants, I spilled coffee on them on the way over here. I instructed the crew to give me a few minutes. I expect a brief on the pending legal action against Highland Aviation after we level off.”
“I’ll do my best, but don’t you think you should discuss that with legal?”
“Nash, you know exactly what I am referring to. Do you have something or not?” Houston asks over his shoulder as he enters the bedroom.
“Yes, I have something but you’re not going to like it. I can assure you of that. I’m just giving you a heads up so you won’t go ballistic when you hear what I have to say.
Charli
I put my big girl panties on today and actually left the house. Walking out to the drive, I unlock and hop into Jonathan’s beat up old pickup. Sitting behind the wheel, I think back to another old pick-up. It was a horrible green, the shade that reminded me of those big old Christmas lights my Nonie always hung on her porch during the holidays. Not really a bright green but not a dark green either. Nonie’s house at the holidays. That thought makes me smile. Shaking my head thinking to myself, my mind is really hopping around. Starting the truck, backing out of the drive and heading down the street, I just want to look around and see where my brother lives.
Five hours later, I’m pulling back into the drive when I see the one thing I hadn’t thought about being here, a GlynisRun delivery truck. I am trying to focus on the delivery but my mind is betraying me. We use GR all the time. (Note to self, talk to Lana/Joan about using a different company.) This means my things are here but I can do without seeing a reminder of Houston Donovan sitting in our drive. Taking a deep breath-darn, darn, darn. I’ve gone at least three hours without thinking about him. Sitting here parked beside the delivery truck, my mind wanders. I catch myself looking at a pair of thongs earlier while I was shopping; thinking about how much Houston would like them because they were his favorite color, navy. Of course, they didn’t cost what the lace pair I modeled for him the night after our meal at Umberto’s. I surprised him with that navy, lace gartered bustier, matching thong, and stockings. Even though I am not a thong type of girl, at that time I would do anything for my man. Hitting the steering wheel with the palm of my hand, speaking to an empty truck I say, “You are not going to do this today. Pull yourself together.”
I hear a pecking on the passenger side window. Looking over I see the GR driver standing there. He opens the door saying, “Excuse me, I noticed you were just sitting here, Mam. Are you OK?”
A half smile, I answer, “Thanks, yes I’m OK. I was just thinking about something.”
Smiling at me, I see his dimple, “just checking. Most people hurry inside in this heat.” Laughing just a bit I say, “It’s not hot to me. I just spent the last year and half in Miami, Florida. Now that’s hot!” Nodding his head in agreement, “I would say so. Well, have a nice day. Don’t forget to catch GlynisRun (with a wink thrown in there) if you can.” The GR man returned to his van and drove away. Exiting the truck, I can’t help but think of the irony of what just happened. A GlynisRun driver winked at me. I wonder how Houston would feel if he knew that. Smiling, I unlock the door and go into the house telling myself, I will put these packages away before I think about dragging in the box from Miami.
Once inside, I realize it is really hot outside. I lay my packages down on the bed, turn to walk into the living room ready to drag the box in when all of a sudden a blinding pain hits me in the head. I think I should lie down. This is the worst one I’ve had in several months. Laying down on the bed, I think back to the last headache I had that was this bad. It was the day we pitched an idea to the Miami office of The Blaine Company. That isn’t what I remember the day for. That day is forever ingrained into my memory. It is the day I first met Houston. I should have listened to my mid-west girl inner voice that tried to tell me he wasn’t right for me but no I just had to go with the part of me that wanted new experiences and to have new people in my life. Well, I see where that has gotten me. I am hiding out in Salina, Kansas.
Chapter 6
“Amber, I am worried about my sister. I’ve only seen her like this one other time. I didn’t think she would ever snap out of that. Of course, it wasn’t just a broken heart. It was a broken body also. It took her body years to heal and begin to work again. I think mentally she was just getting back to a good place.”
“What do you mean it took years? I don’t understand what you mean about a broken body. Jonathan, did someone hurt her?”
“No, she wasn’t hurt by any one person. It was several people that hurt her but it all started because she was in an accident.” Standing in the woman’s kitchen, I am currently, seeing chopping some vegetables for the grill, I hesitate a second not sure how much to share about Charli’s accident. She worked so hard to get her life back. I know how private she is about it. I can’t do this. Even though, I care for Amber, quite a bit actually, I’m n
ot going to get into it. I will protect my sister at just about all costs. Shaking my head, “Come here sexy. I’ve been focusing enough of my attention on my sister, this night is about Amber and John.”
Charli
I slept for almost twenty-four hours. Wow, that hasn’t happened for a really long time. I suppose my head is just catching up with the pain my heart is in. Somehow, it is only fitting that my entire body is processing the loss. Finally, dragging myself up and into the living room, I am looking at the box on the table in front of me. I really am not ready for this but as my Nonie use to say, “Just sitting here isn’t going to get it done. Get up girl and get on with it.” It’s had been awhile since I had really thought about her until I saw John’s truck parked out back. That specific shade of green has really forced some memories to surface. Some good, some great, but some really bad ones also. Nonie was one heck of a woman. I’m glad she wasn’t alive to see how we lost Mama. The fact that the caskets were closed haunts me. Of course, I wasn’t there. I was lying in a hospital bed fighting for my life.
I slap my legs, saying to the empty room, “OK, Charli, get up and get on with it.” Using the edge of the scissor to open the box, taking a deep breath, I dig in. Well, sort of. What I find are other boxes and packing. Picking up each one, I see the ever efficient Joan at work. Each box is labeled- laptop, papers, files, small box, and misc. wait a minute, small box? What small box? Surely, it isn’t what I think it is. Did he have that precious hand carved box sent to me at the office? What in the world would I want with that box? It is just a painful memory of a night that seemed perfect at the time. Reaching up to my neck, the necklace is gone so the joke's on him. I really don’t know what happened to it. I think, I might remember jerking it off my neck at the motel but I could have dreamed that. Who knows? Those days before John came are sort of lost. I do remember buying and drinking lots and lots of whiskey. At the mere thought of whiskey, my stomach gets queasy. If I never put another drop of that stuff in my mouth, I’ll be just fine.