by Cora Brent
We watched Thomas for a few minutes as he continued batting, seemingly oblivious to anything that was going on around him. I didn’t know how he was able to maintain that kind of focus every day. Like I said, the kid was really something.
Dalton asked me about Paige. He knew Paige had been in contact with Cami, who had offered to use her connections to help uncover the fate of Paige’s mother.
“So you and Paige looked pretty cozy together at Thomas’s game last week,” Dalton commented. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you bring someone to a family event like that.”
“Nope, I haven’t.”
He was impressed. “She must be something special then.”
“She is special,” I agreed, thinking about how happy I was to see her when she stopped by the garage today. That led to thoughts about the things she’d whispered in my ear in the parking lot and because I didn’t want to stand in the middle of the batting cages with an epic hard on I turned my attention back to baseball.
Dalton was always happy to talk sports and seemed to think Thomas had a great shot at being drafted into the majors someday. Dalton wasn’t the type to hand out compliments like that for the heck of it so I believed him. My folks had talked Thomas into receiving an education first so it would be at least a few years before anything came of that. But I had no doubt in my mind that Thomas would do whatever it was he set out to do.
“I’m glad he decided on college first,” Dalton said. “He’s not just a great arm, he’s also got a great mind.”
“Something he and Kellan have in common,” I said, feeling pride in my brothers.
Dalton focused on me. “What about you? You going to try school again?”
I’d been reluctantly enrolled in college when my life imploded. After killing a guy and going to prison, sitting in a classroom and learning about Venn diagrams just wasn’t going to happen. Besides, college wasn’t for everyone.
“Nah, I really like working with my hands,” I said and that was true. I was happy to stay at the garage as long as Stone and Conway wanted me there.
“Derek,” Thomas called, finally pausing in his hitting regimen and emerging from the cage. “What are you doing down here?”
“Came to see if you needed a ride,” I said. Thomas didn’t have his own car yet, not that he would ever complain about it. He usually borrowed our mom’s minivan when he was at home but since he was staying with us this week, Kellan had dropped him off here. My dad denied that the reason they were too financially strapped to help Thomas buy a car was due to my legal bills but I still thought there had to be a connection. I’d already put the word out at the garage that I was looking for a fixer upper and my plan was to get Thomas into a car by the summer. Conway and Stone wouldn’t mind letting me use the garage to work on it.
“Yeah, I’d like a ride,” he said and gave me a happy smile. “Thanks.”
That was another reason why the kid was something else. It was so easy to make him happy. Kind of like Paige. She was content to just watch old movies on a Saturday night and then fall asleep in my arms. There was nothing on earth like the kind of peace I felt when that girl pressed her cheek to my heart and breathed out the softest of blissful sighs, as if she might not even be aware she was doing it.
Speaking of Paige, I hoped I could hold out until Friday. Every night it was getting a little tougher to pull back when I wanted every part of her. But now I’d promised her a special night on her birthday and I was going to deliver, even if that level of restraint was more of a challenge than staying sober.
Thomas packed up his gear and I asked Dalton if he wanted to come shoot the shit with us for a while but I wasn’t surprised when he politely declined. He had a pregnant wife waiting for him at home. He wouldn’t be excited about hanging out with me and my brothers and watching us throw French fries at each other or something.
We decided to stop at a fast food drive thru and I ordered a bunch of food, adding some for Kellan who was bound to be hungry when he got home from class.
Thomas, always considerate, asked if we should pick up an extra hamburger for Paige since I planned on seeing her later. The guy was just full of good ideas.
I separated Paige’s food into a different bag so that Kellan wouldn’t accidentally devour it. She’d probably eat it, or at the very least she’d appreciate the gesture, which would score me a few good boyfriend points. In the back of my mind there was still a flicker of worry over the idea that Paige had issues with food. She’d never admitted it and I’d never asked. She appeared to eat normally when we were together but I still had some doubts. There was the time at my parents’ house when she’d run into the bathroom and puked up her dinner after blurting out all that stuff about her mother. She might have just been so upset she couldn’t help it. But then there were other times too, times when she’d excuse herself right after eating and when she returned I’d see her wipe her lips and shove a piece of spearmint gum in her mouth. If she had a problem then I badly wanted to help her. Yet I was painfully aware that you can’t force help on someone who won’t admit that the problem even exists.
Thomas and I returned to the apartment and ate crappy food while sitting on the couch and watching one of those shows where people compete for money by eating cockroach guts or whatever. When Kellan came home he tore through his food and I had to physically restrain him from eating Paige’s. He was all amped up and wanted to go out. Thomas was game but I opted to hang out and wait for Paige.
“Look at him.” Kellan gestured to me but spoke to Thomas. “Big brother’s rapidly becoming all domesticated and shit.”
Thomas cracked up. Evidently the idea was hilarious to everyone.
Kellan already had his hand on the door. “You guys staying here tonight, D?”
“Don’t know yet.”
He shrugged. “Whatever. Give Paige a kiss from me.”
“No.”
“Why?”
“You’re not allowed to kiss my girlfriend.”
I shouldn’t have said that. The boys erupted like they were fucking fifth graders.
When Thomas stopped carrying on over hearing me say the G word he decided to be cute about it. “Aw, Derek has an actual girlfriend.”
Kellan prepared to wipe a tear out of his eye. “It’s like our boy is all grown up.”
Thomas nodded. “Can you imagine how Mom’s going to flip out? She kept going on and on about how Paige was such a sweet girl. I got the feeling she was already counting her grandchildren.”
I gathered up the dirty napkins Kellan had left on the table and stuffed them into a bag. “Mom doesn’t need to hear every detail.”
Thomas snorted. “Like I’m going to keep this information to myself.”
I jerked my head in Kellan’s direction. “He’s a bad influence on you, Tommy.”
He grimaced. “You know I hate being called Tommy.”
“Of course I know that.”
Kellan was ready to move on to something more exciting than pissing me off. He opened the door. “Later, Derek.”
“Later, kids. Don’t get into trouble.”
The boys took off to go wreak havoc somewhere, although in reality I knew they wouldn’t get into trouble. For all of Kellan’s boasting he’d taken a more level headed path the past few years, probably realizing that one fuckup in the family was more than enough. And Thomas was a total straight arrow. The worst thing I could imagine them doing was sneaking into the pool after hours.
When I checked my phone I realized there was a voicemail from Emily Datsun, probably calling to ask me questions about how many meetings I was going to and how I was handling life as a sober citizen. She was a nice lady who’d been there for me any time I needed her yet I didn’t even listen to her message. I just didn’t feel like being Derek the Alcoholic right now. Instead I kept my eye on the clock and browsed the local classifieds page. People out there were searching for some weird shit.
Paige called less than five minutes after she got off wo
rk. She said she needed to stop by Sam and Ric’s because she’d left one of her work shirts at their place.
“Come over afterwards,” I said. “The boys are out so we’ve got the place to ourselves for a little while at least. Plus I bought you a hamburger and I want to teach you how to play Warmonger’s Quest.”
She laughed. “Warmonger’s Quest?”
“Yeah. You’ll love it.”
She laughed again. “I’ll be there soon.”
I loved hearing her laugh. “I’ll be here waiting.”
Chapter Nineteen
Paige
Abbie stuck her head into the kitchen. “Hey Paige, some friends of yours just got here.”
“Thanks,” I said, untying my apron and figuring she must be talking about Sam and Ric. They came here at least once a week when I was working and usually I took a break to go sit with them for a little while.
“Hey Eddie,” I called to the kitchen manager. “Is it okay if I take my dinner break now?”
“Sure,” he said without even breaking the pace as he tossed a pie in the air.
To my surprise, when I exited the kitchen and scanned the dining room in search of Sam and Ric I didn’t find them. Instead I found all three Gentry brothers sitting in a booth on the far side of the restaurant.
“Paige!” Kellan shouted, waving wildly. “We’re over here.”
He had to know he was being obnoxious since I’d obviously already seen them but Derek’s brother always enjoyed calling attention to himself. And it worked. I noticed a few girls checking out their table with interest.
Derek stood up when I approached and he wasn’t at all shy about giving me an impassioned kiss in front of a full restaurant. I could feel myself blushing as I slid into the booth.
“I didn’t know you guys were coming tonight,” I said. My hand found Derek’s underneath the table.
“We missed you,” Kellan explained with a serious expression. “My stupid brother keeps you all to himself and today I said, ‘You know what? Paige is my friend too and we’re going to go down to that pizzeria where she works and see her and maybe she’ll feel like scoring us some free food while we’re there.’ Derek argued with me and then he said some things that were kind of rude but I’ve gotten used to his bad manners.”
“There’s something really wrong with you,” Derek muttered, shaking his head.
Kellan shrugged. “See what I mean?”
Thomas smiled at me. “Hi, Paige.”
I smiled back. “Hi, Thomas. Are you enjoying your break?”
“He got up at dawn and jogged three miles to the gym,” Kellan complained. “I’m not sure this boy knows what a vacation is.”
Thomas didn’t acknowledge his brother. “Yes, I’m enjoying it. Thank you, Paige. I met some friends of yours today.”
I didn’t exactly have a long list of friends. “You met Sam and Ric?”
He nodded. “They were at the gym playing racquetball when I passed by and they stopped to ask if I was Derek’s brother. We hung out at the smoothie bar for a while and talked.”
“Well I’ll be damned,” Kellan sputtered.
Thomas looked at him. “What’s your problem now?”
Derek chuckled. “Don’t be jealous of our little brother, Kel. Somewhere out there I’m sure there’s a girl for you. One who’s not at all selective about the company she keeps.”
Kellan was pouting. “See what I have to put up with?” he said to me. “For the record, I have NO trouble getting girls. Girls love me. Hell, I could stand up and snap my fingers right now and probably no less than ten of them would throw down their phones and trip over their heels trying to get here first.”
He started to stand up on his seat like he was going to demonstrate his magical powers but Thomas yanked on his shirt.
“Do you realize how unenlightened you sound?” Thomas asked.
Kellan sat back down and shot his brother a wicked grin. “Yes.”
“I believe you, Kellan,” I said and that made him happy. I’d already figured out that Kellan loved to show off and give everyone a hard time but I suspected his attitude would change if he ever found the right girl.
Derek was watching me. He smiled. I squeezed his hand. I wondered if he’d been thinking about tomorrow night half as much as I’d been thinking about it all week. I’d been dwelling on those fantasies deliberately, trying to crowd out the more unpleasant things that had happened today. No matter what kind of awful new developments came crashing down I had Derek. And tomorrow was Friday. My birthday. The night Derek and I planned to make love for the first time.
Make love.
I’d never been a fan of the phrase, thought it sounded old fashioned and kind of mushy. Now I kept running the words over in my mind and felt like I might finally understand them. It wasn’t as if Derek and I hadn’t touched each other yet. Far from it. We’d already been sleeping together every night, had already made each other come in a dozen different ways. But tomorrow would be different. And I couldn’t wait.
Abbie delivered two pizzas and a basket of wings. She tried to linger for a minute and insert herself into the conversation but the boys were now only interested in the food on the table and it got awkward with her standing there so she gave up.
Derek noticed I’d taken a slice of pizza but hadn’t touched it yet.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” he asked and I thought the question seemed anxious.
“Yes. I’m just not as quick about it as you guys.” I took a bite of the best pizza in the state and Derek was satisfied enough to turn his attention back to his own plate. I must have just been imagining things.
I chewed on another bite and watched the brothers consume their dinner at breakneck speed. For some reason I thought about the National Geographic channel whenever I observed their eating habits.
“I have some news,” I said and three pairs of blue eyes looked at me.
Derek wiped his mouth. “What’s that?”
I pushed my plate away slightly. “I was going to tell you this later, but I got a call from a reporter in Los Angeles, someone Cami got in touch with. She’s been working on a project and plans to write a book.” I swallowed. It felt like a clot of mozzarella cheese had gotten stuck in my throat. “Over the last thirty years there have been quite a few deaths of unidentified women in the L.A. area, most of them addicts and prostitutes. Since the police department is overburdened she’s investigating the old cases, trying to find out who they were in the hopes any living next of kin can be notified.”
I had to pause to take a sip of water. All around us the restaurant buzzed with noise but our table was dead silent as the brothers waited for me to continue.
“One of them was named Sara, last name unknown. According to records she fits the description of my mother. The reporter’s trying to get her hands on all of the police files and she says they’ll ask me to provide a DNA sample because they’ll want to rule out the possibility that this Sara was my mother.”
Kellan spoke first. “Paige, I’m so sorry.” This was the first time I’d ever heard him sound genuinely distressed.
Derek wrapped his arm around me. “You okay?”
“Yeah, this might be nothing,” I said. “I mean, what are the odds? Los Angeles is a huge city and there must be a ton of unsolved crimes. Sara’s not exactly an uncommon name. Anyway, this reporter’s going to be in town next week for a seminar and she asked to meet me.”
“I can go with you,” Derek quickly offered. I thought about telling him he didn’t need to come, that this lead was more than likely a dead end. For a long time I’d understood there was a high likelihood my mother wasn’t alive. But it wasn’t true that he didn’t need to come. I needed him more than I’d ever needed anyone.
“Thanks,” I said and pushed my plate of pizza farther away. I tried to smile at the boys and couldn’t. Thomas gazed back at me sadly.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin the mood at the table,” I said and started to rise. “
I should go to the restroom and splash some cold water on my face or something.”
“Don’t,” Derek said, a little sharply, and the word was so strange and abrupt that I just stared at him.
He put his arm around me again. “I just mean that you didn’t ruin anything. You can tell me anything, you know.”
Having this conversation in front of his brothers should feel odd but somehow it didn’t. “I know.”
Derek kept his arm around me and the discussion turned to tomorrow’s birthday celebration.
“So what do you want for your birthday, Paige?” Thomas asked.
It was an innocent question but I couldn’t help glancing at Derek and picturing him naked. He caught the look and raised an eyebrow to let me know he knew where my mind was going.
“World peace,” I said, because I couldn’t tell everyone what I was really thinking.
The plan was to meet up at Sam and Ric’s place and then we’d pile into a couple of cars and head over to Sonora’s, a large landmark restaurant a few blocks from the university that was also within walking distance to the park. The well known local cover band we were going to see tended to play a variety of tunes from the seventies through the nineties so it was definitely my speed. I was glad Derek’s brothers would be joining us. Sam and Ric were willing to give him a chance but I knew they were still wary so having Kellan and Thomas around would break the ice. Still, I had no doubt Derek would sooner or later succeed in winning them over.
There were a few hours left on my shift so I couldn’t sit here with the Gentrys all night.
“See you later?” Derek asked while his hand rested on my knee.
“I should be home by ten if you want to just come over,” I said. I realized I should just give him a key, considering all the time he spent at my house.
He nodded. “I’ll do that.” I had already noticed how his brothers appeared extremely entertained by Derek’s attentiveness. Now they nudged each other and smirked.