by Rose Lange
“You asshole.” And with this she slapped him hard across the face.
The tears pooling in her eyes threatened to spill over as she turned away, not wanting to let him see her cry. She slammed the door as she retreated back to her room, not wanting to come out ever again. She felt so ashamed, thinking how she’d practically thrown herself at him, like a glutton, and he hadn’t pushed her off of course. She was beyond mortified.
Annabelle buried her face into her pillow, and cried herself to sleep that night.
Kade got up early the next morning, but instead of popping out of bed right away like he usually did, he lay there for a moment. Annabelle’s scent still lingered on the sheets as memories of last night flashed back in his mind, and he knew it hadn’t been a dream. He still remembered every last erotically sexy detail. Remembered the way she’d looked laying on the couch in nothing but her bathrobe. Her eyes, vulnerable as they’d connected with his, had spoken louder than her body.
Something serious had also happened. He’d connected not only physically with Annabelle, but emotionally as well. And that’s what scared the living hell out of him. That’s why he’d pushed her away, and hadn’t allowed her to sleep in bed with him.
Taking a deep breath he got up, showered, and quickly made his way out. And was grateful that she hadn’t yet woken up. He felt like a complete and total heel and needed to talk to somebody. So he decided to take the twenty-minute drive to town and visit his dad. He didn’t have to be to work until later this afternoon and he was going crazy. He knew he wouldn’t be able to make it through the day without getting these thoughts off his mind.
And as he drove, he couldn’t help but replay last night in his mind again. How vulnerable she’d looked, how heartbreakingly beautiful, and how she’d been as much the aggressor as he’d been. Then how incredible and fiery fucking hot the sex had been. It still made him hot to think of her paying his member a visit. The incredible way her mouth had . . . he shook his head. He had to stop thinking about last night because it made him insane and wanting more. But the one thing he couldn’t take back was how awful he’d felt for how he’d treated her.
He was thankful when he saw his dad’s red pick-up truck in the driveway. He was in the kitchen cooking breakfast. It made Kade’s stomach growl at the smell of fresh coffee being brewed, and bacon and eggs frying on the stove.
“Morning, Kade, what brings you here?” his dad asked, grabbing a mug, and pouring a cup of coffee.
“Hi, Dad, I just thought I’d come out to visit you. See how you’ve been.” But knowing he wouldn’t get away with such a lame excuse.
Kade finished putting cream and sugar in his cup, and sat with him. He looked out the window at his dad’s backyard. The garden, filled with fresh tomatoes, cucumbers and beets, was still in the same spot next to the shed, and flowers of every color still bordered the tiny yard, making it look like a rainbow. The old swing set he used to play on as a child still rooted in the same spot. Blue with rust spots, especially at the legs, but he imagined it still worked fine. He smiled with the memories of his childhood. Before his mom had passed away and left a giant hole in his heart. Then when Annabelle had left him, the hole got even bigger, and he never fully recovered.
His dad frowned, looking at his son knowingly. “You’re not fooling anybody. It’s too early in the morning for a visit. Is it who I think it is?”
“Annabelle.”
His dad raised a brow and it was like looking in a mirror. “So things are not going well I take it?”
Kade laughed, and was unable to look his father in the face. He scratched the back of his neck, suddenly feeling awkward and very uneasy.
“Is there something you’re not telling me, son?”
Kade took a deep breath. “As you know a relative of hers passed away, and in order for either of us to inherit anything, we have to live together for two months. There’s a month left and she’s driving me crazy.”
Crazy in and out of the bedroom, but he couldn’t tell his dad that. He was humiliated enough just thinking about last night in his presence.
His father looked at him, a warm smile on his face. “I know things were going rough there for a while, but it can’t be that bad. You still love her, don’t you?”
“Dad, of course I still love her.” He got up, raking a hand through his hair. “But I can’t get over what she did to me, and how she left me for no damned good reason.”
“And?” His father queried, as though he knew there was more.
Kade let out an exasperated breath. “And I slept with her last night.” He glanced at the ground, unable to look his dad in the eye. And his face warmed up by the minute, as sexy flashbacks once again went through his mind. He’d always felt comfortable talking about sex with his father, but for some reason this was different. This was sex with Annabelle, and he realized that’s what made it different. He couldn’t help the smile that crept across his face, because damn, she’d been unforgettable last night.
His dad cleared his throat. “So what’s the problem?”
“I was an ass! I treated her horribly, and gave her the impression that I just used her. I only did that because I’m still hurting, and I guess I wanted her to hurt, too.” He already felt better that he’d finally gotten most of his feelings out in the open.
But still feeling lousy about how he’d treated her. She didn’t deserve it and it was a poor excuse to hurt Annabelle.
“Why don’t you tell her what you just told me?”
“Because I’m afraid she won’t believe me. That she’ll think I’ve just made it all up.” He sighed. “I guess I’m afraid.”
“Of what?”
Kade looked him in the eye. “Of being hurt again.”
His father hung his head for a moment before he spoke, “I understand that son, but that’s no reason to mistreat a lady.”
Kade nodded, knowing the words to be true. He sat down, thrusting his hands through his hair in frustration. His father raised him to be nothing short of a gentleman, and how he’d behaved last night was well below par.
“I know that, it’s just . . . I find myself wanting her and hating her at the same time. It’s like an on-going, constant battle, and I feel trapped in the middle,” he finished, relieved beyond measure that it was all out in the open.
That everything he’d been feeling for weeks now, was out in the open. As though vocalizing his feelings set him free, for the most part anyway. Ever since he’d laid eyes on Annabelle O’Sullivan again at the attorney’s office, he knew life would never be the same again.
After the divorce she moved out of state. He never thought he’d see her again, but obviously Karma had other plans in mind.
“Kade, you need to learn to forgive and let go of these bitter feelings.” His dad took a deep breath, as if to brace himself for what he had to say next. “When your mom passed away twenty years ago, I didn’t think I could go on without her. But, I had to think about you, and what she would have wanted.” He paused. “I’ve learned that you can’t take life or people for granted, not even for a moment. Because you just don’t know if tomorrow will come, as cliché as it may sound.” With this he took an appreciative sip of his lukewarm coffee.
“I miss mom.”
“I do too,” he said, but very softly.
“Dad?”
“Yes, son?”
“How do you go on living when you’ve lost someone you love?”
His father’s shoulders relaxed. “You have to think about how they’d want you to carry on your life. Your mom was a great person, and a wonderful wife and mother. But, even though it was out of her hands, she felt guilty for leaving you.”
“Guilty?”
He nodded. “She had cancer, and felt like she could’ve done something to prevent it. She knew it wasn’t her fault
but somehow, she felt like it was.”
Kade smiled with the memories of his mom. He was only twelve when she’d passed away, and he hadn’t realized it still hung heavy in his heart all this time. How much he still missed her after all these years. How much he wished she were around. Thinking how nice it would be in more ways than one, and that she could have talked to Annabelle. Because God knew Annabelle’s own mother wasn’t much of mother, or her father for that matter. She was an orphan in a way, even though both of her parents were still alive.
Father and son sat there for a moment, before his dad spoke again. “Bottom line. Don’t let life pass you by being bitter. I understand how you’re angry and still hurt. But, I’m sure if you talk to her, tell her how you’re feeling, she’ll understand.”
Kade nodded, smiling for the first time that morning. “Thanks, Dad.”
“Anytime, my boy. Anytime. Now, how about some breakfast?”
Annabelle was greeted to an empty cabin that morning, but it was more than a welcome sight, especially after last night. She didn’t want to face Kade. She was not only angry, but couldn’t help as her mother’s voice sounded in her mind. ‘He’s too good for you, Annabelle. You’ll never be enough for him.’ She didn’t believe her yesterday, but now the words came back to haunt her.
She shook her head, trying to rid her mind of the negative thoughts. She was relieved to go to work this morning. At least there she could take her mind off her troubles. Even though she knew she’d have to face him sooner or later.
She took the long way into town, just to take time and think. Thinking she’d enjoyed last night, maybe more than she ever thought she would. She’d felt more than she’d bargained for. Already, she was starting to fall for Kade again, and that scared the hell out of her because she just wasn’t good at relationships. And to top it all off Kade had been a total ass last night, discarding her like a rag doll after the most intense, heart stopping sex she’d had in years. She wanted to kick herself, hard, in the butt, because she wanted him all over again. And again . . . he was like a strong narcotic and she was already addicted.
The silent drive into town gave her some time to think, and clear her mind of the cobwebs. She had to get her head back in the game, and remember what was at stake. As Annabelle walked into the store, Becky greeted her with a smile, getting the cash register prepared for the day. “Good morning, Annabelle.”
“Hi, Becky, how’s it going?” She faked a smile as she set her things down at her desk in their office. Hoping her voice didn’t sound too weary.
“Fine, how are you?” Becky looked at her friend quizzically.
Annabelle didn’t face her, but merely sat at her desk, fumbling through yesterday’s mail and not really looking at it.
“I’m okay. Why do you ask?”
“Because you’re not yourself.”
Annabelle looked up, and tried to keep her face neutral. Tried her hardest not to allow her emotions to show on her face. Something she wasn’t very good at no matter how hard she tried. “I’m fine and can we please just leave it at that.”
Taking a seat next to her, Becky put a comforting hand on her knee. “You aren’t fooling anybody, what’s wrong?”
Annabelle closed her eyes for a moment, collecting her thoughts. She set the mail aside, then looked up into her best friend’s concerned brown eyes. And knowing she had to tell her otherwise she’d go crazy. She had to get it off her chest.
“I slept with Kade last night,” she blurted out.
Chapter 8
Blowing out a breath of relief, she tried to stop the moisture pooling in her eyes, and her bottom lip from quivering, but couldn’t. Ever since his painful rejection she’d been an emotional wreck. After they’d shared the most emotional, and powerful sex, the way he’d brushed her off hurt more than she thought it would.
She looked up at Becky, and found her eyebrows raised, in what she assumed was shock.
“And?” Becky pressed.
“And he was a complete jerk, treated me as if it meant absolutely nothing. Like I was some hooker he’d picked up on the street.” She wiped away the tears that managed to spill over.
Becky let out a soft chuckle, shaking her head. “I’m sure it meant something to him, Annabelle. Why, the day he was here looking for you, as angry as he was, I knew he felt something for you, just by how he was looking at you. As if he only had eyes for you.”
Annabelle knew exactly what her friend was saying, but didn’t quite believe it wholeheartedly. She wanted to, wanted some kind of assurance, but last night was still too fresh in her mind.
“I don’t know about all that. It doesn’t explain last night.”
“He’s probably still angry and hurt from when you left him. And you have to give him time to heal.”
She wanted to believe everything her friend was telling her, but the part of her that was still hurting and bitter didn’t want to hear it. Her heart, however, told her otherwise. “He also doesn’t know what I went through after our divorce.”
That statement made Becky stand at attention. “Kade doesn’t know about Brad?”
Annabelle wordlessly shook her head.
Becky went to shut the office door part way. “He was highly abusive, possessive, controlling. You lost a baby because of him and you haven’t told Kade? Why not?”
Annabelle shook her head, and closed her eyes again. Wanted to shut out all the bad memories that flooded back into her mind. Besides her childhood, those had been the second worst days of her life, and her own personal living hell on earth.
“Not just yet. I’m not ready to tell him.”
“But he’s probably a lot of the reason, apart from your childhood, why you’re so afraid of intimacy, of a relationship.”
“I’m not ready to tell him yet, please don’t push the issue,” Annabelle stated, rising to her feet. She picked up the abandoned mail, intending on looking through it later this morning. She took a quick glance in the tiny office mirror, and turned back to her friend.
“Now, let’s get ready for the workday.”
Becky quirked an eyebrow at her, and she knew this conversation wasn’t over.
“Fine, but can I ask you one more question?”
She let out an exasperated breath. “Go ahead.”
“How was the sex?”
Annabelle smiled. Closing her eyes as every vivid and intimate detail of last night washed over her. Every moment his hands were on her, playing her like a piano. The moment he possessed her body and soul and she was complete. The moment when more than their bodies connected, but their eyes . . . everything could be summed up in one word. She opened her eyes and said, “Spectacular.”
Becky covered her mouth and burst into a fit of giggles.
“Now, will there be any other questions?”
Her friend merely shook her head. “No, that’s all.”
As she watched Becky walk out to the storefront, she couldn’t help but think that her mood had lightened, albeit a little. She knew everything Becky said was true, and that she could probably give Kade some time, not be so hard on him. Hell she should probably start with speaking to him again.
But damn it, she was still too angry with him to even think about talking to him. Let him stew in his juices for a little longer. It would serve him right.
“So, we didn’t get to finish our conversation earlier this morning, give me some details.”
Annabelle held her cell phone away from her ear for a moment. The heat crept up into her face and throat. Becky was ruthless, and she wouldn’t give up until she got all the dirty details.
“Some girls don’t kiss and tell.”
Becky’s laughter filtered through the line. “Oh please, that’s half the fun.”
She shook her head, as she made the turn int
o the cabin’s long driveway. As it came into view her heart skipped several beats. She tapped her thumb impatiently on the steering wheel, because for the first time since they’d made love, she couldn’t wait to see Kade. And she wasn’t even sure why.
“How did it all start? Can you at least tell me that?” Becky’s voice came across the line and snapped her back into reality.
“I went to visit my parents earlier that day, and I was vulnerable when he got home. He tried to comfort me and one thing, sort of, led to the other.”
At the mere mention of that night, no matter how many times she talked about it, brought her back to it. Without fail. And each time she relished in the erotic memories. He’d been absolutely amazing, and as angry as she’d been with him, damn, she wanted him all over again. She wanted to christen every room of the cabin with him, and when they were done, wanted it all over again.
“Annabelle? You still there?”
She shook her head, seeing the cabin coming closer in the distance. “I’m fine. Listen, I have to get going. Just got home.”
Becky grumbled in what was most likely frustration. “Okay, but this is far from over. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay, talk to you soon.”
Annabelle hung up the phone and tossed it into her purse. She sat back for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts. Since it happened, she tried to understand why he treated her as though she were some hooker off the street, but she couldn’t. Even more humiliating was the fact that she had thrown herself at him, or at least that’s how she felt. She liked to blame it on her frazzled state of mind yesterday after the visit to her parents but knew better.
She wanted Kade, plain and simple.
When she entered the cabin, the lights were off, except for the one near the sofa, and it cast a comforting and soothing glow in the room. She could hear music playing softly in the background. Not that she cared, but she wondered where Kade was.