by Alex Powell
"I can't look," Meow said, shoving his head behind her ear, tail twitching in agitation.
Ira put a hand up to stroke his head soothingly.
"If you had just become a doctor, you wouldn't have to put up with this," the doctor said unsympathetically.
"Doctor Glazova, I'll kindly thank you not to question my choices," Ira said flatly, feeling the prick of Meow's claws as he bristled defensively.
"Your constructive magic is wasted on planes! Just think of the lives you could save with the proper training. You could just knit your own flesh back together in a moment, and poor Lieutenant Kuzmina's wrist would be fixed up in a heartbeat."
Ira smiled tightly. "Thank you for your work, doctor."
She left the tent quickly. Every single time she came into the medical tent, it was the same thing. Somehow, Ira always had the bad luck of running into Doctor Glazova whenever she was there. It was as if the woman was constantly working! She was glad Dounia hadn't been there. The last time this had happened, Dounia had almost gotten into a yelling match with the doctor.
Ira knew that she could have gone to university. They accepted very few women, but a woman with constructive magic could be a doctor. She was smart, and dedicated, and any university would have been happy to take her. Instead, she'd gone and joined a flying club and become a flying instructor and a part-time plane mechanic.
"She's just afraid of flying," Meow hissed, curling up around her shoulders again.
Ira didn't point out that Meow was also afraid of flying. Their valiant comrade insisted on coming up every single bombing run anyway, terror notwithstanding.
The storm was raging as she left the medical bay and went to look for Dounia. If she knew anything, it was that aviators always ended up at the mess tent, so that's where she headed first. She poked her head in, and there was a group already assembled. Ira smiled. Dounia was talking heatedly with a young woman that bore a striking resemblance to herself, and in her ardour, had completely forgotten to take off her bomber cap.
"Dounia, sweet one, take off your cap," she called as she entered.
Dounia looked up and came over, pushing the others aside to get to Ira. Meow jumped back across to Dounia's shoulders when they were in reach.
"Is your arm alright?" Dounia asked in concern.
"Nothing a few stitches couldn't fix," Ira said firmly, and then reached up to remove Dounia's cap.
As soon as the cap was off, Dounia shook her head, and two large triangular shapes sprung up as they were set free from the cap's confines. Dounia flexed her ears, a matching pair to Meow's, and groaned.
"They always feel funny after being stuffed under my hat like that," Dounia complained.
"I don't think I'll ever get used to that," a new voice joined them. Tanya, Dounia's younger sister, came up beside them, staring at her sister's cat-like ears. "I haven't told mama about them, and I assume you haven't either."
"I've been busy," Dounia said defensively.
"What's wrong with her ears?" Meow asked, sitting up straight on Dounia's shoulder. "I can tell you right now they are far superior to human ears."
"He's just saying that because you shared his blood," Tanya huffed.
"And what noble blood it is," Ira said. "When did you get here, Tanya?"
Tanya bounced on the balls of her feet and answered, "I just got here an hour ago, but all of you were still up in the air. I was worried about you, you know. I saw that there was a storm coming in, and I thought it might be dangerous, but I know that Dounia's the best pilot, so obviously you would be fine. I was still worried though. Did you get hurt, Ira? You know Dounia always gets really grumpy and snappish when you're hurt."
She babbled the words out so fast that Ira could hardly process what she was saying.
Dounia, no doubt used to the barrage of words replied first. "You've met Ira all of three times. That doesn't count as 'always.'"
"It does when she's been injured all three times that I met her!" Tanya trilled, still bouncing up on her toes. "And you've been grumpy all three times, too."
Ira tried to recount in her head these three times. The first week after they'd been assigned to a team, they'd met Tanya because she'd come to try and apply to the air force, like Dounia. She'd been rejected because her eyesight was bad and she had to wear glasses. Ira had managed to accidentally temporarily blind herself with a mirror spell that she hadn't perfected yet. How was she supposed to know that the angle of the sun and the angle of the mirror spell would align like that?
The second time, it was just after Dounia had volunteered for the experimental magic operation that had given her perfect night vision, cat ears, and Meow. Perfect night vision had been what they were going for, and the scientists had decided that the ears were a side effect that wasn't really worth the perks of being able to see at night. Ira had a sprained ankle, because Meow used to have a bad habit of pacing around when he was anxious and Ira had tripped on him.
The third time was right now.
"She's right, I was injured," Ira reported. "All three times."
"That makes it sound like you're always injured," Dounia grumbled. "Which is completely untrue; you've only been injured when Tanya was here. Tanya, you're bad luck. Go back to Moscow, and then we'll all be safe."
"That can't be true," Tanya protested. "People get hurt all the time."
"Not so much as a stubbed toe any other time," Ira smiled. "I've only been injured when you're around."
"That does make me sound like bad luck!" Tanya said, sounding thrilled at the idea. "Anyway, I came to tell Dounia my good news."
"You're going back to Moscow tonight," Dounia said.
"No, don't make fun of me, Dounia!" Tanya finally stopped bouncing on the spot. "You know how I wrote and said I was training to be a radio officer? Well, I finally got a placement."
"Back in Moscow."
"No, near the front," Tanya said. "I'm very good under pressure, they said. That's why I was given such a useful position."
"Useful."
Oh, dear, Ira recognized that tone of voice. It usually led to an hours-long argument that was carried out at roughly the volume of a Messerschmitt taking off. She braced herself and waited for the inevitable.
"Yes, useful," Tanya said, a hint of hardness entering her voice. Evidently she also recognized Dounia's tone, and was aware of what usually ensued. "They offered me the position and I accepted."
"Didn't you think of what our parents would want? You'll be in danger that close to the front!" Dounia's voice was already rising.
"You didn't care what our parents said," Tanya said. "You just signed up, and I know it's a lot more dangerous than sitting behind the lines and radioing out bombing targets."
"We can't both be in danger!"
"Our whole country is in danger. That's the whole point of this war," Tanya snapped back in reply.
"I don't think you understand."
"No, I don't think you understand!"
The two of them faced off, nose to nose. They were both short, stocky women, and the image was a funny one. Generally, Ira liked watching Dounia argue with someone, for this reason alone. But the conversation topic did not bode well for the future.
"You can't go to the front. You said you were going to ask to be stationed here! Or Moscow! Did you lie to me?"
"You can't tell me what to do anymore, Dounia. We're both adults now."
"Fine!" Dounia snapped, shaking with anger. "Do what you like. But I'm not going to support you on this, because I don't agree. You said you'd stay away from the front lines."
"I only said that so that mama and pap wouldn't try and stop me," Tanya said. The and you part of the statement was left silent and implied.
"I refuse to argue with someone who lies to get her way!" Dounia yelled and stormed out of the mess tent.
Tanya watched her go sadly.
"Was I a fool to hope that she'd be happy for me?" Tanya asked.
Ira patted her shoulder. "I'll try and
talk her around, but she is very hard to convince once she has an opinion. As you know already, I'm guessing. How long will you be here?"
Tanya looked at the ground. "Only long enough for everybody else assigned to the front to report in, and then we all have to move. Probably a few days."
"I'll see what I can do," Ira said, but she wasn't sure that Dounia would come around anytime soon, not when it came to her baby sister being in danger.
Dounia and Ira shared sleeping quarters, and Dounia was already curled up and pretending to be asleep when Ira got back. Ira pretended she didn't realize Dounia was pretending and undressed as quietly as possible, before slipping into bed behind her. She fit her longer body up behind Dounia's short frame snuggly.
Ira smiled as she felt Dounia shift back into the cradle of Ira's body and slung an arm around her waist, tangling their legs together. She placed a soft kiss right at the nape of her neck and nuzzled her head into the back of her shoulder.
Dounia shifted in her arms, turning her head slightly so that Ira could kiss behind her ear and the side of her face. Ira leaned up onto her elbow to give herself some leverage so that she could finally press her mouth against Dounia's.
"If you're going to do that, I'm leaving," Meow grumbled from where he'd settled in the corner, and he disappeared quickly.
Ira ignored him in favour of moving around to get herself positioned on top of Dounia. Dounia was warm from being under the covers, and Ira tried to get closer. Dounia finally helped by turning onto her back and pulling Ira on top of her. Ira settled onto her and leaned down to kiss her again.
"We shouldn't be doing this now, too many people are still awake," Dounia murmured, but didn't pull away.
"There's a storm. No one else is out in this weather, even if they are awake."
Dounia argued no further, getting her arms up around Ira's back and tilting her head up to deepen the kiss that Ira had started. Dounia's mouth was warm and soft and Ira hummed happily into the kiss. She was in no hurry to get anywhere tonight.
Dounia had other plans, apparently, spreading her legs so that she could wrap them around Ira's hips, pushing up against her and demanding attention.
"Something you wanted, dearest?" Ira asked, laughing softly.
"You know what I want," Dounia said, huffing and arching her hips up again.
Dounia was already slick and open with desire, and two of Ira's long fingers breached her opening easily. Dounia squirmed underneath her, urging her deeper. Ira nuzzled at Dounia's neck, tilting it to the side so she could lick and nip at the soft skin. Dounia threw her head back and shoved a hand over her mouth to keep quiet.
Ira grinned and curled her fingers against her warm inner wall, pushing up at her swollen nub with her thumb. Dounia's hips shuddered up against Ira's hand, and her teeth bit into her own hand in an effort to keep the noises inside. Dounia moaned low in her throat, a rough, needy sound barely contained.
Ira pressed herself up against Dounia, and Dounia helpfully pushed her knee up between Ira's legs, giving her a warm surface to writhe against.
Panting and covered in sweat, the two of them collapsed together in a sated pile, with barely enough energy to settle themselves in for sleep.
"I'm tired," Dounia said, and she sounded drained.
Ira had been trying to distract her from the argument that Dounia had just had with Tanya, but it looked like Dounia was still worried about it.
"Maybe things will be different tomorrow," Ira offered.
"I doubt it."
"Sleep, kotyonok," Ira said softly.
Dounia relaxed into their embrace and her breath soon evened out, slow and deep. Ira pressed her face into Dounia's hair and breathed, Dounia's scent calming her. Dounia wasn't the only one who worried about her loved ones.
TWO
Dounia saw a flash of familiar black hair and heavy-lensed frames and immediately hid behind the corner. She was somewhat ashamed of how she was avoiding Tanya, but she didn't know what to say anymore. Things were complicated.
"Are you hiding again?" Meow asked grumpily from around her neck. "This is getting to be annoying, Dounia. You need to talk to her."
"You sound like Ira," grumbled Dounia, shoulders stiffening.
"Ira is right," Meow said. "You do need to talk to her. She leaves in the morning."
Dounia hadn't known that.
"To the front?" she asked in a whisper.
"Where else? She hasn't changed her mind just because you won't talk to her."
Dounia bit hard on her lip and didn't say anything else. She didn't want to tell Meow that she'd very childishly been hoping that Tanya would feel guilty about Dounia avoiding her and do exactly that. Apparently Tanya was made of sterner stuff than she'd thought and wasn't backing down. Dounia should have realized she wouldn't. If she wouldn't listen to their parents, there was no way that she would listen to Dounia.
Meow made a sharp noise and jumped down off her shoulder. "If you're going to be this silly, I'm going to find Ira."
Dounia was avoiding Ira as well. Not as much as Tanya, but only because she had to work with Ira still. But outside of practicing manoeuvres and doing more nightly bombing raids, she wasn't talking much to Ira either. Ira kept trying to talk her into making up with Tanya, and Dounia just didn't want to do it. Nor did she want to talk about it or why she didn't want to talk about it. Or anything to do with feelings, really.
Dounia knew she was bad at explaining feelings, and didn't like talking about them in general. It was causing problems now, and had in the past as well. It was not her most endearing quality.
The best part about the whole situation was that Dounia knew she had this problem and was still adamantly refusing to try and fix it. Never mind that Tanya was the younger of the two; Dounia was the one being childish.
Dounia peeked around the corner again and sighed. Tanya was sprawled on the ground with several of the other pilots and navigators of the regiment, one of whom was Ira. Ira and Tanya were sitting together and chatting.
"So are you going to go talk to them yet?"
Dounia stifled a yelp and jumped back, glaring down at Meow, who had snuck up behind her. Meow flicked his tail and regarded her with a flat, unwavering stare, as only cats can.
"I can't talk to them," Dounia hissed. "It's not as if Tanya would listen to me anyway. She's already made up her mind to go."
"So you're not going to say goodbye to your sister just because she's not doing as you say?" Meow asked. "What was the last thing you said to her? Do you want those to be your final words before she has to go into dangerous territory?"
"Now you're really sounding like Ira," Dounia growled. "Why is she taking Tanya's side in this? Ira's my lover, not hers."
"Yes, and Tanya's your sister. Everybody is yours and because they are yours, they are only allowed to do what you want. Also, you might want to keep your voice down, someone might hear you."
"I'm pretty sure they already know," Dounia grumbled.
"Assuming something and hearing it said aloud are two different things," Meow said. "No one can accuse you based on an assumption. But if you say it, then you've just admitted it, and an admission can be court marshalled."
"See? You're worried about me, right?" Dounia asked, making a sharp gesture with both hands. "I'm worried about Tanya. She could get hurt! She doesn't know what she's getting into."
"Neither did you when you first joined up," Meow pointed out.
Dounia heaved a heavy breath and looked at the ground. "Who could have ever expected this when we volunteered to fight? Nothing could have prepared us for the sights we have seen or the things that we have done in the name of the motherland."
"And you do not want Tanya to have her eyes opened to this," Meow finished.
"No, these eyes have seen too much, and I want her to be spared," Dounia said, peering back around the corner to watch Tanya talk to her fellow aviators. "Look at them all, they're congratulating her. How could they? She is going straight into
the mouth of hell. It looks bad enough from the air."
"She is not a child. It is her own choice, as it was yours. She's the same age now as you were when you first joined."
Dounia didn't say anything, because Meow was right. She had no right to keep her sister from doing exactly as she herself had done when women were first admitted to the Soviet forces.
"I want to know what they are saying," Dounia said. "Will you let me listen, brother?"
Meow flattened his ears, but agreed begrudgingly. "I should not be enabling you in your avoidance manoeuvres, but maybe if you could hear what they were saying, you would cease to act so foolishly. It is a good thing I love you, solnyshko, or I would refuse to put up with this tiptoeing around."
Meow padded off, and Dounia sat down and leaned back against the wall behind her, closing her eyes and concentrating. Or, rather, not concentrating. She had to let her mind free, set it loose to wander and it would be drawn to Meow's head like a moth to flame.
She and Meow shared blood, after all.
Sometimes they could see or hear through each other's senses. She'd gotten Meow's night vision and his ears. Meow had gotten her vocal chords and colour vision. No one who had taken part in the experiment had thought their blood would mingle so much, and it was agreed that they wouldn't try again on a human subject until they were sure it would work as planned.
It was a good thing that Meow was a witch familiar. Who knows what would have happened if they'd used an ordinary cat. What if their brains had been switched? A familiar had similar intelligence to humans and sometimes formed empathic connections with their chosen witch. Meow was the only proof ever uncovered that familiars actually understood the human language.
Meow's mind glowed green and violet in her mind's eye, and she followed it until they connected. Each time Meow blinked, the scene around him came more into focus and sound filtered in slowly. She was next to Ira's feet, encased in over-large combat boots worn out from numerous night missions.
"I've tried everything, Ira, and nothing is working. Any time I get close to her, she runs away and hides."