“You’ve been caring for a sick child for the last few days, it’s understandable you’d be tired. Why don’t you sit down and I’ll bring you a cup when it’s finished.”
“I should make breakfast.”
He grabbed two mugs from the rack. “Let’s talk first. Have you had a chance to think about the transfusion?”
“All night.”
“What have you decided?” He poured the coffee, before going to where she stood by the sofa.
She took hold of the coffee he offered but didn’t take a drink of it. “After you checked on her at four this morning she had a hard time going back to sleep so we laid there talking, telling stories. She seems so much better.”
“The antibiotics and fluids have done a lot to help her, but don’t let that fool you. She’s still sick and needs to take it easy for a few days.” He sat down next to her on the sofa. “The round of powerful antibiotics finished throughout the night so I can remove her IV line when she wakes up and she can move around the house easier. If we’re not going to do the transfusion then I’ll need to make a trip into town for the iron pills and some additional antibiotics.”
“What’s the worst that will happen if I decided not to do it? Will it kill her?”
He set the coffee aside and took her hand into his. “No. She’ll be tired and require more sleep. She might be more irritable, have occasional headaches, and if it gets worse she could have shortness of breath and trouble concentrating. Though I don’t think we have to worry about that for now, her levels are low but not dangerously low where we need to be overly concerned.”
“Is there anything I can do besides the treatment that will help her?”
“There’s an iron supplement I’ll pick up in town that she can take twice a day. Eating more iron rich food would be beneficial as well, and I’ll get you a list of those too. Should I take it you’ve decided against it?”
She set the coffee down and turned to him. “Yes, but not because of going into town. You mentioned the risks of the treatment and I’m concerned about that, especially with her current health. I want to wait and see if the pills will be enough to help her.”
“Then how about going into town with me?” He felt her body tense under his touch. “Halloween night, after the trick-or-treating, Michael and Jes are having a party. It’s going to be small, mostly others from the hospital. Ryan will be there, so will the Winterbloom owners Chloe, Jordan, and their daughter.”
“I don’t know.” She bit her lip, nervous.
“It’s the perfect chance to test the waters in a protected environment, and there will be other children Abbi can play with. You don’t have to make the decision now, just think about it.” He gently squeezed her leg. “Instead, how about the three of us take a ride into town today?”
“Why?”
“I have to go to the office to get the medication. You could come with me. You can see how much Clearwater has changed and it will be a good way to entertain Abbi without having her overdo it. I won’t be long at the office and you don’t even have to get out of the truck. It will be the first step in the right direction.”
“Let’s see how Abbi feels when she wakes up. She might not be up to it.”
He smirked. “That sounds like an excuse.”
“Maybe a little,” she admitted over the rim of her coffee cup. “I’m not ashamed to say I’m terrified of the idea.”
“I’ll be there and I promise everything will be okay. Trust me.” He rubbed his hand along the top of her leg, not high enough to be questionable but to give her comfort to ease the anxiousness rising within her.
“It might be crazy but I do trust you.”
He couldn’t stop himself from leaning forward; he wanted to kiss her.
“Mommy,” Abbi called from her room.
“I should check on her.” She rose and headed for the bedroom.
“While you do that, I’ll make breakfast.” He stood, taking his coffee with him. He’d finish it and pour himself another while he cooked. Walking around the sofa to the open kitchen he couldn’t help but remember how much he despised coffee before medical school. The long hours studying and then his internship had changed his tastes. Coffee had become a lifeline and the only way he could start a day. Without at least a cup, if not more, his brain refused to come out of the fog and focus.
He pulled open the refrigerator door, taking in the contents, before deciding to make French toast. It was an easy dish Jes had taught him when he was still in medical school. At least he knew he couldn’t screw up French toast while his thoughts were on other things. Or at least on one woman—Ella.
* * *
“Morning darling.” Ella smiled at the sight of her daughter curled up in the middle of the full bed, the blankets pulled around her waist.
“Can I get up?”
“In a bit, Doctor Macis needs to take out your IV first.” She same to sit next to her daughter. “You’re looking better. How do you feel?”
“Okay, my chest still hurts.” As if to emphasize that, Abbi’s small body shook with a coughing fit.
“You know Mommy loves you, right?”
“Yeah.” Abbi leaned back against the pillows and brought her light brown teddy that had been Ella’s when she was a child to sit on her lap. “What’s wrong? Are you in trouble with Ryan again?”
“No.” She smirked, thinking of the last fight she had with Ryan before Abbi got sick. Like all the others it was about them living out in the woods and what it was doing to her daughter. Ryan’s words haunted her: How will she handle the first day of school if she’s never even been into town? “Do you ever wish you had someone else to play with?”
“Like a little sister? Will you give me one?”
“No, sweetie, we’ve talked about this.” They had been through this a few times over the last few weeks, ever since the bedtime story that had a baby sister in it. Now all Abbi wanted was a sister. That was something Ella couldn’t give her without a man, and that was most likely never going to happen. “I was thinking more like a friend.”
“I don’t know, they might try to take Mr. Bear from me. Or break my toys. Though it might be fun to play hide and seek with someone else.”
“It is sweetie, it is.” Ella wasn’t happy about this sudden revelation her reclusiveness was denying Abbi a lot of what she’d experienced as a child. With a deep breath to calm her rolling stomach, she decided it was time to at least try for her daughter’s sake. “Doctor Macis needs to go into town for more medication for you, and he asked us to ride with him. Would you like that?”
Her little head bobbed up and down in excitement. “Can Mr. Bear go with us?”
“I don’t see why not. You stay in bed and play with him while I help the doctor with breakfast then we’ll take your IV out and get ready.” She stood up and took a look around Abbi’s room. If it wasn’t for the few toys, mostly dolls and stuffed animal scattered around the room, no one would know it was a child’s room. The walls were a warm gray, event he full size bed was bland with a quilt that her grandmother made years ago. Nothing like that room Ella had as a child.
She turned on her heels and escaped the room before she cried in front of him. I’m screwing up raising my baby girl. Damn it, what’s wrong with me?
As she came back into the living room, James turned to look at her, a suspicious glint in his eye. “You okay? You look pale, you’re not coming down with something, are you?”
She averted her eyes, then let out the words she could no longer hold in. “For years I’ve kept on my rose-colored glasses…” She scoffed. “I never truly understood the consequences for my actions.” Leaning against the back of the sofa, she watched him, waiting for his response. “Shit, this revelation sucks.”
“Sometimes we have to have an eye-opening experience in order to live the life that we were meant to have.” He flipped the French toast before continuing. “Take me for example. I lived for my work in Denver, and that’s what made me a partner i
n the practice. The long hours with my own patients, covering for the senior partners when they wanted time off, handling extra hospital shifts or rounds. It all added up and when Jessi moved here I realized if something didn’t change, I’d end up like our father.”
“So that’s why you moved here?”
He nodded. “I was looking into positions when Michael suggested I come on as his partner so he could spend more time with Jessi and the twins. It was perfect. It gave me a less stressful work environment, and enabled me to be close to my nieces.”
“I don’t think this is going to turn out as well as things did for you.” She frowned and dug her fingers into the fabric of the sofa. “I’m a terrible mother.”
He piled the last of the French toast onto a plate, then set the tongs aside before going to her. “You’re not. You’re raising a wonderful little girl. You’ve worked with her to begin her education, and she’s further along than most children her age. That’s something to be proud of.” He laid his hand over hers.
“Look at her room. Does that look like any little girl’s room you’ve ever seen? She doesn’t have any friends. What kind of mother does this to her child?”
“You’re doing what you think is right by her. That’s all any parent can do.”
“Maybe you and Ryan are right. Maybe I need to at least travel into town to socialize Abbi. Or maybe I should consider going to Cheyenne like my parents asked. It might be the only way for me to put the past behind me.”
“Come here.” He placed his hands on her hips, drawing their bodies so close they were almost touching. “Facing the past is the best thing, and once you do that you can begin to make a better life for you and Abbi. I can help you with that…if you’ll allow me.”
“I admit I miss having a life. Going to Express Ohh’s to satisfy my coffee addiction…then I always used to browse the Happy Ever After Bookstore for the newest read. Seeing friends…going to the different activities at the lake, skiing, and snowboarding in Jackson Hole. I want Abbi to experience all the things I did growing up.”
“Then let me help you give them to her. Take this ride into town with me, it’s the first step in getting your life back. Then maybe we can go to the Halloween festival at the lake, I’m sure Abbi would love it. She can experience the carnival rides, all the delicious food, and you can see no one blames you. All while I’m by your side.”
“Why? Why do you want to help us?”
He caressed along the curve of her hips, gently, so as not to scare her off. “Have you ever felt a connection between someone you just met…but you knew they were special?” She froze at his touch, tentative, nervous. “That’s how I feel about you and Abbi. Last night, sitting in front of the fire, I got to know you more than anyone else in my life. I told you things Jes or anyone else doesn’t even know.”
Her heart skipped a beat, and fear tightened her stomach. She had a feeling she knew where this was going, but it excited and terrified her. “What are you saying?”
“That you are special to me and I want to see where this goes. I won’t pressure you, but you’re not going to be able to push me away like you tried to do yesterday.”
“Like yesterday?” Her brows squinted together in confusion.
“When Michael said I was doing this out of charity, you were ready to send me on my way. The only thing that stopped you was that Abbi needed medical attention.” He paused as if waiting for her to deny it before he continued. “You’re frightened, and I understand, but I’m not going to hurt you.”
“Isn’t that what they all say? No one scares their prey by telling them what they’re going to do to them.”
“Is that what you think, that you’re my prey?” He leaned down until he could press his forehead against hers.
“No, I just meant…” She kept her hands on the sofa, her body trembling, even though she wanted to wrap her arms around him as he held her.
“I’m not sure how to convince you I’m not like every other man you’ve known.” He moved his hands up her back, pressing her a little closer to him. “You have to trust someone and I’m asking to be that person. Otherwise, we’re both going to lose out on something special.”
“Not every man, just Josh. He screwed with my head and it’s hard to trust anyone after all he put me through. Even after years of having Ryan visit, I’m still cautious of him.”
“That couldn’t have anything to do with the fact that he nags you to come back to town? Or that he could take your daughter away if he thought she was being neglected or in danger because of your lifestyle choice?”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. “You could do that too.”
“No, I don’t have that power, but you have to know I wouldn’t. Raising a child isn’t easy but I think you’re doing a good job.” He wrapped his arms tighter around her, closing the last distance between them until he had her wrapped in a hug. “I promise you everything is going to be fine. We’re going to get through this together. Abbi, you…and me.”
She let her head rest against his chest because she wanted to believe him. Trusting him would take everything in her, and if he let her down it would tear her apart. After Josh, she thought she had nothing left to give, but now she wanted to find that part deep within her she had hidden away. She wanted to trust James, to believe in him, to allow everything to fall into place. The question was, could she do it?
Chapter Seven
James strolled from the office with the medication in hand, feeling relaxed and more carefree than he had in months. The ride into town had gone smoothly. Ella was surprised by how little had changed since her last visit, while Abbi was filled with excitement. He took his time, making passes on the side streets so she could see the different businesses. The only place he avoided was On the Rocks, not wanting to make her think about what happened there almost five years ago. Instead, he kept it pleasant, even taking a drive past Clearwater Lake to see the first rides being erected for the festival.
He glanced around the empty parking lot, wondering if it would be too much if he suggested they sat in the gazebo for a while, letting Abbi play in the grass. When he saw a few hospital employees at a nearby table he decided to save the idea for another day. He waved to another doctor who was getting out of his car across the parking lot before he opened the truck door and hopped in.
“Did you get what you needed?” Ella asked, her gaze scanning the parking lot. She still had a smile on her face, and that was what mattered most to him.
“Sure did.” He tossed the small paper bag of medication into the armrest compartment. “What do you girls say, want to drive around town some more? I can take you past Michael and Jessi’s, and my rental house is just down the road from them.”
“Can we, Mommy?”
“Why not.” She grinned back at her daughter. “As long as James doesn’t mind.”
“Please, Doctor Macis.” Ella begged, leaning forward from where she was nestled on the back seat.
“Little one, your wish is my command.” He smirked. Everything was perfect. He shoved the truck into drive and started to pull out of the parking lot, when his cell phone rang. In the pit of his stomach he knew he shouldn’t answer it; whoever was on the other end was about to spoil this perfect moment, but as a doctor he couldn’t ignore it.
He pulled to the side of the exit and tugged his cell phone off his belt. “I’ve got to take this.” Ella nodded as he brought it to his ear. “Doctor Macis.”
“James, this is Jordan Shepherd, I need your help.” The Winterbloom Bed and Breakfast owner’s voice came through the speaker with a touch urgency.
“Is it Bianca?”
“No, Bianca and Chloe are fine. I have a friend and a former Marine, Sergeant Gioven Sparks, staying here at Winterbloom. I need your help with him.”
“I’m a pediatrician, I don’t know what I can do to help. What’s wrong with him?”
“His last deployment was hairy and he’s turned to the bottle to help him cope. I need to g
et him out of On the Rocks, and Ryan’s on police business. I don’t want Chloe there, but if I can’t find anyone else, that’s what I’m going to have to do…unless you can help.”
“No, if he’s a drunk former Marine you’re going to need more than just Chloe. Leave her home with Bianca and I’ll meet you there. I’m at the hospital, give me five minutes.”
“See you there, I’m already in the parking lot.” Jordan ended the call.
James locked his phone screen and clipped it back onto his belt. “I’ve got to help Jordan, I can leave you in my office if you’d prefer.”
“Where at?”
“On the Rocks.” He saw the fear shine in her eyes. “You don’t have to go in, you can wait in the car or wait here, but I need an answer.”
“We’ll go. There’s no reason for you to come back here for us…but we’ll wait in the car.”
He shoved the truck back in drive. “I’ll try to make it quick.” Knowing the sacrifice she was making, he reached across the seat to lay his hand on her leg.
“I know you will.” She placed her hand over his and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Are you sure two of you can handle a drunk Marine? Maybe you should call for additional help.”
“We’ll be fine. Once we get him under control, the bar owner, Daniel Bridge, will help if we need him to. He’s probably tired of hearing Gioven’s problems as he downs a bottle of whiskey. Daniel is a bartending therapist…at least according to most of the town’s drinkers.” He took the alley from the hospital over to Queen Street, where On the Rocks was just about on the outskirts of town.
“What’s whiskey?” Abbi questioned as she rocked Mr. Bear in her lap.
“It’s a drink for people Mommy’s age.”
“Nasty stuff.” He glanced in the review mirror back at her, wrinkling his nose in distaste. Turning his attention back to the road he made the turn into the parking lot and immediately spotted Jordan leaning against his truck.
The truck took to the gravel parking lot with ease and he pulled up next to Jordan before putting it in park. “I’ll be right back.” He squeezed her hand before grabbing the door handle. He hated to leave her in the one spot he knew brought back bad memories, but he couldn’t let Jordan handle this on his own.
Small Town Doctor Page 5