He placed one of his hands between her legs, gently caressing the damp lips of her sex through the lace underwear. He felt the wetness grow and smiled to himself, ever so slightly intensifying the pressure of his movements. Heather’s eyelids were half closed in pleasure, and Tanner could see her chest rapidly rise and fall in response to his touch.
He gently pulled the crotch of her panties to the side, exposing her to the cool air of the room. With one finger, he traced the outline of her delicate folds, watching them swell and moisten at his touch. When he heard her release a soft moan, he slipped his finger into her entrance, massaging the more sensitive skin within. Finding her hardening bud, he stroked it gently, feeling her wetness gush from within her, dampening the bed sheets beneath them.
“You’re so wet Heather. Look at how much you want me.” Tanner rasped, trying to control the movements of his finger to keep his touch light. Heather almost whimpered in return, and he could see her thighs clench in response to her pleasure.
The restriction of Tanner’s jeans was now agony. He leaned backward to unfasten his button, and felt Heather’s hands cover his.
“Let me.” She looked up at him with her beautiful, angelic face, and he melted at the open and innocent gaze that met his. He nodded briefly, words dying on his lips as with trembling fingers she slowly released his zipper and gasped as his boxer-clad, heavy erection was exposed.
She took it in her hands, gently rubbing the material of the cotton. Heather greedily eyed his size and thickness, feeling a desperate ache within her core as she anticipated him entering her. She moved her hands to the waistband of his jeans and pulled them down his muscular thighs. Tanner stood up, and let the jeans fall to the floor. Heather stayed seated on the bed, drinking in his toned, broad body.
Tanner removed his boxers, and stood naked before her. The tip of his shaft glistened with a bead of moisture, ready for her. Heather leaned backward, expecting him to climb on top of her. Instead, Tanner approached the bed and gently turned her over. He pulled down her panties, gently stroking the plump cheeks of her backside as he did so. Once they were removed, Heather felt his erection rest against the opening between her legs. She trembled in response, opening her legs a little wider to allow him access.
Tanner groaned, gently grabbing the flesh on the back of her thighs and guiding himself to the swollen lips of her sex. With incredible gentleness, he rubbed himself back and forth against her, enjoying the wetness sliding up and down his length. He’d never known a woman to be so ready and willing, as if her entire being was built for his pleasure. Heather cried out, she couldn’t contain the unrelenting shocks of pleasure running through her body.
Tanner flipped her around, more aggressively this time, and pushed her further up on the bed. He buried his head between her legs, parting her lips gently with his fingers and lapped up the warm wetness within. The stokes of his tongue drove Heather to near oblivion, she spread her legs wider and pressed herself against him, driving his tongue further inside her.
Tanner flicked his tongue against her bud, and Heather could feel the waves of an orgasm building within her.
“Please…Tanner – I need you inside me. Please.” Heather gasped, trying to fight the tides of pleasure as she felt herself tipping over the edge.
Tanner didn’t need any more encouragement. He guided his ready shaft into Heather’s channel, sucking in a short breath as he felt her amazing, swollen, soft, moist flesh surrounding him, sucking him in tighter, clenching at his erection.
Heather called out his name as the pinnacle of her pleasure crashed and reverberated around her body. She clung to him, not wanting his motion to stop. She’d never felt so full and greedy as this, feeling complete yet yearning for more. Tanner leaned over her, balancing his frame on his elbows and forearms. His chest and shoulder muscles twitched with the effort of restraining himself.
Heather looked up into his eyes, seeing dark pools of lust meeting hers. She moved her head up and kissed him, deeply, trying to convey the myriad of emotions that were raging within her.
Tanner felt himself lose control as her lips met his. Deep within him he felt the familiar tug, centered within his lower abdomen, as his primal urges struggled to be released. Tanner tried to regulate his breathing, slowing down the motion of movement within Heather’s body, but it was too late. Heather arched against him, moaning in pleasure, clenching him tighter within her.
“Heather,” he gasped.
She reached up and stroked his jaw with her fingers, her eyes looking deep into his, “Come in me, Tanner.” The words were hoarsely and breathlessly whispered into his ear, but he felt them deep in his soul. He stopped struggling against the feeling and let his urges flow unchecked.
His desire increased, not just physical desire, but one that was driven by heart and mind. It overtook all bodily sensation apart from Heather and the way her hips were gyrating against him.
His hands clenched at the bedding, as his entire body spasmed. “Heather,” he half-growled her name, releasing himself in pulsating jets within her.
Sated, Tanner’s head dropped onto Heather’s soft breasts. He was still inside her, and despite finding release, he was still hard. His body couldn’t get enough of her.
Heather closed her arms around him, curling her body into his. They slept like that, entwined on the cotton sheets, till morning.
16
“Watch this one, Heather!” Chloe was on the back of a pony, practicing jumps with the help of Josiah. She leapt cleanly over the wooden jump bar, and the horse landed on the other side, before cantering around the yard to complete the jump a second time. Heather applauded enthusiastically from beneath the shade of the ranch out building.
Tanner was standing a few yards off, tirelessly removing rocks from the earth. His aim was to create a soft, fertile area in which Heather could have her own herb or vegetable garden. He’d kept his plan private, telling them all that he was extending the chicken coop, but the conspiratorial wink Josiah gave him told Tanner the old man knew differently.
That morning Heather had set up a make shift easel and brought out some paints, intending to capture the beautiful Wyoming scenery. She had started to do just that, but the moment Tanner had begun work, she’d been unable to take her eyes of him, and so the page now captured his muscular form, shirtless in the heat.
She watched as his back and biceps rippled as he moved, lugging rocks back and forth over the soft earth. As she watched, she noticed that when his body stood under direct sunlight, she could see faint markings all over his chest and back. It looked like long strips of his flesh had been carved out of him, and Heather wondered if, when in bear form, he fought with other beasts in the forest. The thought made Heather shudder. She hated the idea of Tanner fighting alone in the wilderness, unable to protect himself with human tools.
Heather caught Tanner’s eye, and gestured toward the pitcher of lemonade on the table next to her. She rose to carry it over to him, but instead he made his way toward her, wiping away his sweat with a spare rag.
“You are a good woman, Heather Ayer. My mouth feels like the desert.” Tanner came and sat down next to her, emitting a sigh of relief. Heather poured him a glass of lemonade.
“What are you– oh, that’s me.” Tanner’s eyes rested on her half-finished drawing, and raised his eyebrows in respectful acknowledgement at how good it was, “You’ve got talent. That’s impressive.”
Heather blushed, “It’s not finished yet. You got in the way of the mountains.” Tanner gave a short bark of laughter, “Yeah, sorry about that.” They smiled at each other, and then Heather’s eyes drew back to his chest. The scars weren’t as noticeable in the shade, but she could still see very subtle outlines of their grooves marking his skin.
“Tanner, what are those marks on your body? They look pretty ferocious… I thought maybe a wild animal had hurt you?” Heather was tentative approaching the subject. She didn’t want him to think she was prying.
Tan
ner smirked. It was not a happy look. In fact, his bright mood seemed to have immediately vanished. There was silence for a few moments before he spoke, “Not an animal exactly.” Tanner took a gulp of his lemonade and then rand his hands through his hair. “I guess there’s a couple of things I still need to tell you.”
“Not if you don’t want to, Tanner. You can keep whatever you want private,” Heather replied, meaning it. She didn’t want to pry into his life, she knew without a doubt that Tanner was a good, honest man, and whatever he wanted to keep private he could do so. She trusted him.
“No, there’s stuff you should know. It’s about Chloe, too. But I guess I’ll start with the scars. As I said yesterday, my father died when I was young, he was like me and my brother – a shifter. He and my mom were crazy in love. She never really recovered from his death.”
Heather nodded in understanding, a loss of a loved one was always painful, but if his father had been anything like Tanner, it would have been unbearable.
“I don’t remember much of him. Which is a shame, but just the way it is. Anyway, my mom married again, not so well this time. He was a nasty junkie, beat her up something rotten. When he found out what me and my brother were, well, he didn’t like it. He would lock us up in cages. Whip us with chains and whatever was lying around. Starve us.” Tanner shrugged, “Like I said, a mean bastard.”
Heather looked away. Her vision had started to blur as tears welled up in the corners of her eyes, but she didn’t want Tanner to see her crying. What would be the benefit to him of her tears? There weren’t tears enough in her body for the sorrow of a child being treated that way.
Tanner hadn’t noticed that she’d turned away. He wasn’t able to look at her. Still, after all these years, the subject of his stepfather bought up nothing but shame. He hadn’t been able to protect his brother, and he hadn’t been able to save his mom from her eventual fate and her bad choices. Ashamed that he let himself be treated that way, ashamed that he’d spent the whole of his life believing he’d deserved every whip, every slice of flesh ripped from his body, every hour that he spent in starvation, closing his eyes as he drank stagnant water left for them in a dog bowl.
“Anyway, my mom couldn’t cope. She got hooked on heroin. Didn’t know whether she was coming or going. My brother and I ran away. I was sixteen, he was fourteen. I worked down in Arizona. Mining. It was good, better than we had it at home. After a year, we found out that she’d died. We went back briefly to pay our respects, but then we never went back again.”
Heather couldn’t find the words to express herself. The tears were streaming down her face now, and she kept her eyes fixed on her hands, clasped together tightly on her lap. She couldn’t stand the thought of Tanner going through so much pain. How lonely he must have been, how neglected. She knew about men who worked as miners. It wasn’t an easy life. Not by a long shot.
Tanner glanced over at her, half dreading Heather’s response. Seeing his bear was one thing, knowing how he’d let himself be so dehumanized was another. On seeing her tears, he rushed to comfort her.
“Shit, Heather, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to get upset.” He placed his hand on her back, finding a comfort in her warm sun-heated skin.
“You’re sorry?!” Heather was half-hysterical at his apology, “What do you have to be sorry about? Oh God, Tanner, what happened to you is awful. Appalling. I’d like to rip that man apart with my bare hands. But I’m the one who should be sorry. I don’t mean to cry. I’m sorry, I am… it’s just…” She couldn’t finish. A fresh set of tears erupted from her, and she hastily wiped at her cheeks. Aware that Chloe wasn’t far away, and she didn’t want her to see her like this.
“You’re amazing.” Tanner’s voice was hoarse with unshed emotion. He hadn’t expected this kind of reaction, hadn’t expected her to care so deeply about him. He should have known better. He desperately wanted to pull her into his arms, take her upstairs and make love to her again. She was unbelievably beautiful to him in that moment, her eyes red-rimmed from crying, her rose bud lips swollen from bites as she anxiously tried to repress her emotions.
Tanner steeled himself. He needed to tell her about Chloe as well. It was important that she knew everything, but the worst of it was done.
“Are you okay to talk about Chloe?” Tanner asked, gently caressing her back.
“Of course,” Heather tried to smile, “Just ignore the crazy weeping woman over here.”
“You’re not crazy, Heather, I can’t tell you what it means to me that you’d have that kind of reaction.”
Heather nodded, trying to shake off the tears and return to normality. “Go on. About Chloe, what is it you need to tell me?”
“Chloe isn’t mine. Biologically speaking.” Heather raised her eyebrows at Tanner’s words. It was the last thing she’d expected him to say.
“I can’t have children. Chloe’s mom and I, well…” Tanner looked down again, he wasn’t sure what to say exactly. He knew that the situation surrounding Chloe’s birth wasn’t his finest hour. But, he took a breath and continued, “When she turned up pregnant, I was just getting the ranch up and running, and was kind of resentful towards her. She was in delicate health, and when she gave birth to Chloe, she died, as you know. She died in childbirth. I knew Chloe wasn’t mine from the start, but, when I looked into her tiny eyes… she was mine.”
Heather looked over at Chloe, now brushing down her horse, guided by Josiah. She felt sorry for the girl who had grown up without a mother, so like herself. She also knew absolutely that Tanner had raised her loving her as much or more than any biological father could. She also knew, without a doubt in her mind that she was absolutely, unconditionally in love with him.
She had questions—questions that she wasn’t about to ask. Tanner hadn’t explained how Chloe’s mother had become pregnant if he was unable to father a child. Had they used a donor? Had she been unfaithful? Maybe they’d met and fallen in love before she knew she was pregnant. Since Tanner hadn’t offered an explanation, Heather wasn’t going to pry. The man had dug deep enough into his painful past for one today.
“I can’t have children, either.” She smiled at him, and took his hand in hers. “But Chloe has brought so much love into my life, she’s all I would ever need or want.”
Tanner exhaled in relief. Her small hand over his made him smile. Chloe may have brought love to her life, but she had brought it to both of theirs. “I wanted you to know something else, too. Once a man like me, a bear shifter, finds his mate, it’s for life. They can have companions that they treasure if something separates them from their mate, but it’s never the same. The bond between a shifter and his true mate, it’s one that’s eternal.”
Heather nodded and tried to smile. She suddenly felt cold. She understood completely, and a few days ago being Tanner’s companion would have made her content and happy. Now, she wasn’t sure. It almost seemed like a gentler and kinder parallel to her and Bertram – a man who just couldn’t truly love her. But this would be worse, because what she felt for Tanner made her old feelings for Bertram pale to insignificant in comparison.
It was as if the universe had played a cruel trick on her, gifting Heather the one man she could be herself with and love completely, but then having that man forever bonded to a ghost, unable to love her the way she needed.
Tanner rose from his chair. He hated how awkward he could be with words, what had meant to sound romantic had probably come out too cheesy and ridiculous. The smile she’d given him in return hadn’t quite reached her eyes. Though, Tanner reflected, he had just dumped a lot of information on her. Maybe she just needed some time. It wouldn’t put a halt the afternoon plans he had hatched up. Whatever she felt, he knew he was doing the right thing.
“Chloe and I need to go into town this afternoon. Just for a couple of hours. Can I get you anything when I’m there?” Tanner asked her.
Heather tried to pull herself out of her mood, and smiled brightly back at him. Shaking
her head in a ‘no’, not trusting herself to speak. She watched as he walked toward the main body of the ranch, and felt a knot of misery form in her stomach.
17
Heather retreated to her bedroom after Tanner and Chloe left. For the first time since she’d arrived at the ranch, she felt lonely. It wasn’t a novel emotion. She’d spent years of her relationship with Bertram feeling like she was a stranger in her own home, and when she ventured out onto the streets of New York it was as if she got lost, a nobody that faded more and more every day.
Would the same thing happen if she stayed here? Heather knew that Tanner would care for her, and they got along well. That would only grow as they became more comfortable with one another. Last night had been amazing. She may not be his mate, his true love, but he certainly treated her that way in bed. And Chloe. She wanted to stay with her, watch her grow and help her along the way. She already loved her so much. It would be agony to leave her.
The doorbell of the front entrance rang. It surprised Heather. All the men used the back entrance. Maybe Tanner was expecting company and had forgotten to tell her. As she made her way down the stairs, the doorbell rang again. Whoever was on the other side was impatient.
Heather opened the door, and her senses were immediately assaulted by incredibly strong, sweet perfume.
“Oh.” Kellie Lane looked perplexed by Heather’s presence. “Tanner here?” she asked, looking Heather up and down.
“He just stepped out with Chloe. They won’t be long.” Heather replied, wondering who the woman was. She had a mane of platinum blonde hair, and large breasts barely concealed by a neon pink tank top.
“I’ll wait.” Kellie barged passed Heather, accidently-on-purpose hitting her with her handbag.
“Do you… know Tanner well?” Heather asked. She didn’t want to be rude and ask the woman who the hell she was, but it was certainly tempting.
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