by Alexa Hart
“Fuck,” he says as he lifts me gently back to sitting and kisses my forehead gently. “That was amazing,” he looks almost sheepish.
“Hmm,” I say. I lean into his body and smile into his neck. “I can’t believe we haven’t been doing that this entire time. It seems a waste,” I lean up and kiss him. The kiss starts playfully but turns needy and urgent until I again feel his erection growing between us. He turns me roughly around and leans me against the table so he is behind me. He runs his hand across my back and teases his cock against my bare ass. I let out a little gasp of pleasure.
“I guess we’ll need to make up for lost time,” he says.
Chapter 18
Summer
After that, things between Kane and I change, in a delicious way. It’s like Kane and I decide to enjoy the illusion, so much so that it’s hard to know where the fake marriage ends and the real relationship, or whatever it is, begins. We belong to each other; we just don’t talk about what that means after the contract is over. When we don’t have to be married anymore, what then? But instead of working it out, we avoid it. Instead, for the next month, we make love almost every night, and every day after I take Maddie to school. I had joked that I had a lot to catch up on now that I knew how good it was, but Kane didn’t take much convincing, and I get the feeling he can’t keep his hands off me even if he wants to. And he isn’t sleeping on the couch anymore. He’s always in bed with me, his leg or arm tossed over me in protective ownership and his mouth nuzzling in my neck. I hadn’t realized how alone I’d really felt until I wasn’t alone. But it isn’t that I have someone. It’s that I have him. As much as I want to convince myself I just enjoy this strange, sexy break from reality, it doesn’t always feel like that. It feels as real as anything, or like the first real thing in a long time.
Kane isn’t just done avoiding me in the bedroom either. He’s still quiet, but he’s around. He wakes up early, helps Maddie and I in the kitchen, watches movies with us, spends all his extra time at the bakery helping me out with repairs. He and Maddie are teaching me how to play poker and Maddie takes both Kane and I for all we are worth. We even take the swear jar, which thanks to the ways Kane drives me crazy in bed was basically full to the top from me, and we go out for pizza like a real family—since Maddie insists that Chicago deep dish pizza is the best type of pizza in the whole entire world. She isn’t wrong.
The morning after the pizza, I don’t feel well. I stay in and Kane takes Maddie to school and offers to go to the bakery and help get things going until Poppy comes in after school. After he’s gone, I throw up a couple of times and feel sure I’d gotten food poisoning. Becca texts me and I feel like I can’t avoid her anymore. I also feel like I need her. The contract is going to be up pretty soon, and I don’t know what I’m going to do.
“You look awful,” Becca says as we video chat.
“Gee, I missed you too,” I say. “And I have food poisoning.”
“Bummer. Now,” she says. “Tell me why you’ve been avoiding me.”
I take a deep breath and then hold up my left hand, wiggling my ring finger in front of the camera lens. That’s the other thing, I’ve stopped taking it off. I still haven’t told Rudy anything except that I found a solution to Angelo’s problem, but I will.
“What the holy hell?!” She screeches so loudly I think I’d hear her from England even if we weren’t on the phone.
“It’s not what you think,” I say. “Now are you sitting down? Preferably with a glass of wine?”
An hour later, I’ve told her everything. She is stunned silent, which is saying a lot for my chatty bestie.
Becca blinks at me. “Oh, Summer,” she smiles coyly. “You’ve gone and fallen in love!”
“You aren’t mad?”
“No! You’re having a way bigger adventure in Chicago than I thought.”
“I’m still sorry I ditched our plans.”
“I wasn’t mad because of the plans. I was mad because I wanted you to finally stop trying to be someone who doesn’t cause trouble and is perfect and safe and just be free to live your life.”
“That’s not….”
Becca shakes her head. “I know you. I know you were always afraid of being abandoned. But it sounds like you found someone who makes you feel safe.”
I nod. Then I feel my stomach lurch again. “I think I have to go puke again. Remind me to never overeat deep dish pizza again.”
Becca is quiet for a moment. “Summer, is there a chance it isn’t food poisoning?”
I am silent.
“You already thought about that, didn’t you?” She asks quietly.
I nod. “Only the first time, we didn’t use protection. So it’s possible. The problem is,” I say. “It should be freaking me out, right?”
“But?” she asks.
“I think it would be okay if it wasn’t food poisoning,” I say quietly. “I want a family with him. I want this marriage to be real. Becca, does that make me crazy?”
“Yes,” she says. “But that’s love, Summer. Love makes even valedictorians crazy.”
Chapter 19
Summer
A few days later, I buy a pregnancy test and confirm what Becca suspected. I am pregnant. There are many emotions I thought I would feel at this moment, panic being one of them. But somehow, maybe because I have so loved taking care of Maddie, or because I am back in Chicago helping with my family bakery, or because I like the little home we have made these past few months, I am not scared. Unsure, nervous, and oddly excited, yes. I always wanted to raise a family. And I think it’s also because this is a baby Kane and I made together. I can’t deny that even though I was trying to make myself believe I was detached and understanding of this being a fake marriage, I’ve obviously been lying to myself. My only hope is that Kane has been lying to himself too. I decide to wait until after his birthday to tell him, just in case, and because I am scared, not of having a baby, but of being wrong about Kane and what he wants. I’m not ready to face that reality head-on.
Kane’s birthday arrives and I pick Maddie up from school early so we can go home and make the cake she’s been wanting to make for him since we first met on that bus. On the way home though, we hear a whimper in an alley and stop. In a discarded box near a dumpster is a small dirty puppy caught up in string.
“Oh my gosh,” Maddie says as I gently and carefully untangle the puppy. He whimpers and licks my fingers, instantly attached to me for rescuing him. Maddie picks him up before I can stop her. “We have to keep him.”
“Keep him?” I say. “We need to take him to a shelter.”
“No way!” The puppy whimpers in adorable agreement in Maddie’s arms.
I frown. There is no way Kane wants a puppy, but I also don’t even know where we would take him without going home and making a few calls. And we can’t just leave him. “We’ll bring him home for a few hours and feed him, just until I figure out what to do,” I say. “But then he goes to a shelter. Okay?”
“Okay,” she says. “But when Daddy sees him, he won’t be able to say no!”
We bring the puppy home and Maddie feeds him a little deli meat and peanut butter. The puppy, exhausted from the rescue, curls up on a little blanket while Maddie and I work diligently on a three-layer devil’s food chocolate cake with caramel icing. It seems fitting that Kane’s favorite cake is devil’s food. Maddie insists we cover the top with M&Ms and sprinkles, and the cake is a chocolate lover’s fantasy when it’s all said and done. He’s late coming home so I text him. The puppy wakes up and Maddie takes him out back for a little playtime. I can see letting her bring the puppy home was a mistake. She’s really attached already and it’s going to make taking the puppy to the shelter that much worse tomorrow. But I smile. I kind of agree with Maddie that Kane is actually a pretty big softie and once he sees Maddie and the puppy together, I wonder if he’ll really say no. I place my hand on my stomach. I hope he doesn’t say no.
When Kane gets home, Maddie is ups
tairs playing with the puppy in her room and he comes into the kitchen as I am guiltily licking the knife from frosting the cake. He takes the knife and spins me around, giving me a deep, bone-shaking kiss. He’s got a few cuts on his face and I pretend not to see them, not to see how his job is about hurting people and being hurt. I put my hands up over his eyes.
“It’s bad luck to see the cake before the birthday song,” I say.
He lifts me up and shoves me against the fridge. He tugs my hands down and kisses me again. “I don’t think that’s how the saying goes,” he says.
“I should warn you about something,” I say, wanting to bring up the puppy.
“I know ...you're dangerous,” he nibbles at my neck as if I am the dessert. I feel my body react and I wrap one of my legs around him as he pushes against me. We both hear the footsteps upstairs and pull apart. He brushes a strand of loose hair back from my face. “To be continued, Princess,” he says.
“Daddy!” Maddie calls out. “You’re home late!”
“Sorry!” Kane opens the fridge and grabs a beer. “But you know I wouldn’t miss my own party!” He yells back.
“I’ll be right down,” Maddie says. “I’ve got the best gift ever!!!”
I know for a fact Maddie got her father a new toolbox for his birthday since I helped her pick it out, but I have a sinking suspicion that she isn’t referring to that.
“I think Maddie might be up to something….”
He looks at me and arches his eyebrows. “Definitely up to something,” he agrees.
I have a gift for Kane too, and framed photo of the three of us taken at the wedding. I feel a little unsure if I should give it to him, but then he looks at me and smiles as he sips his beer and I feel, well, like the picture isn’t a lie. Like he’d like seeing us all together on that fateful day as much as I do.
We hear Maddie plodding down the stairs. She sneaks a peek around the corner. “Let’s sing the song, now, okay?” She winks at me. I light the candles on the cake and we sing Happy Birthday while Maddie comes in with a large box. It isn’t wrapped and it’s got holes in the top. When she places it on the counter as Kane blows out his candles, I hear the box yap.
“Shh,” Maddie whispers to the box.
“Maddie!” I say.
“Hmm,” Kane says as he gently lifts the top. “What could this be?”
As he opens the box, the puppy pops its head out and yaps again.
“Ta-da!” Maddie says. She scoops the puppy out. “Isn’t he cute.”
“It’s not what you think,” I say. “I told her we needed to take it to a shelter, not give it to you as a gift!”
Kane picks up the dog. He looks a little silly, like a man holding a live grenade, but the puppy yaps and rubs his head against Kane’s large rough hands.
Maddie nods. “Candy Kane likes you.”
Kane coughs. “We are not calling him that,” he says.
“But we’re calling him something, right?” Maddie says. “Because we’re keeping him? Please, please, please!!!” She jumps up and down, clapping her hands.
“I thought this was a present for me, not you,” Kane says.
“I’ll do all the work,” Maddie says.
Kane sighs. “And he gets a tougher name.”
Maddie nods. “Not a problem. We’ll name him Thor or Nails or...I know ...Monster!”
The doorbell rings and Kane looks up with surprise. He looks at Maddie and then at me.
“Don’t look at me. I don’t have any other animals being delivered,” I say.
Kane looks at Maddie. “There better not be a pony named Kane Junior waiting at the other side of the door,” he says. He goes to open it and Maddie and I are giggling behind him when we see who it is. Trixie Marino is standing in the doorway wearing a red halter top and tight black leather pants. She holds out a bottle of wine.
“Hey, Trixie!” Maddie calls out enthusiastically. “What are you doing here? We got a dog!”
“You did?” The puppy yaps at Trixie’s feet and she carefully steps over him in spiky black boots. “Kane you keep surprising me,” she smiles at Kane and then turns to me. “I guess thanks to you our wild boy is a changed man now. A real standup citizen.”
“Trixie,” Kane’s voice is tempered, but the edge is there.
Trixie smiles too sweetly at Maddie. “I came to wish your dad a happy birthday.”
I step forward and scoop the puppy up. “Hi,” I say. I can’t help but notice again that Trixie is gorgeous. Thick black hair and a perfect hourglass figure.
She walks past Kane and hands me the wine bottle. “Be a dear and open this for us would you?”
“Um, sure,” I say dumbly, taking the wine.
“I can do it,” Kane says. But Trixie grabs his arm as he starts to walk by and she tugs him back. “Sit here with me and Maddie,” she says. They sit down and Trixie puts her arm around Kane, even leans in and fixes his collar. “Summer you don’t mind. You’re so good at being helpful.”
“Sure,” I say.
Back in the kitchen I open the wine bottle and cut the cake. Before I head back in I take the present for Kane, the framed photograph, and shove it under the sink. Giving it to him in front of Trixie feels like a bad idea.
Trixie stays most of the evening. Maddie falls asleep on Kane’s lap and he carries her up to her room with the puppy at his heels. While he’s gone, Trixie smiles the kind of smile at me that makes me want to run for cover. She comes over and sits next to me.
“So, Summer,” she says. “What’s your secret?”
“My ...secret?” I ask, taking a sip of water and really, really hoping Kane hurries back down.
“Yeah! Until a few weeks ago, he was coming over to my house most nights. But lately…” she smiles at my obvious look of surprise. “He’s been elusive.”
“He was staying with you? But we're ...married.”
Trixie laughs. “You say that like you believe it! Of course, he asked Julie to marry him when we found out about Maddie, but that’s only because he was being honorable. He’ll never do it for real. He’s always been adamant about that. And he’s also one to enjoy a variety of women, you know, sometimes at the same time.”
“You know about the contract?” I ask. Nobody was supposed to know except Maddie.
Trixie sips her wine. “Of course! At first, I was really upset about the whole thing. But then he explained about the little act. So I wanted to come out here and see for myself,” she sighs.
“See what?” I ask.
“How you two are getting on,” she sips her wine. “And I feel much better now.”
“You do?” I ask.
“Yes. Because there’s no way you can keep a man like Kane. He’ll get bored of you fast. And he hates the clingy type,” she says this with a smug attitude. “He’s never really been yours, sweetie.”
“Everything okay?” Kane comes down the steps.
“Peachy!” Trixie says. “Now get your coat.”
“Why?” Kane asks.
“I got some of the gang meeting us down at the Black Diamond.”
“Trixie,” Kane looks exasperated.
“Come on,” she says. “Danny’s got the crew together. It’ll be fun.”
He comes over and stands next to me. “We don’t have a sitter.”
“Sure you do,” she says. “Isn’t that Summer’s job!”
“Trixie,” Kane growls. I can’t believe it. At some point, Kane told Trixie the truth, even though I couldn’t tell Uncle Rudy. I feel so deflated I nearly cry right then and there. Instead, I keep my hands busy by starting to clear the plates from the coffee table. “It’s fine. You should go. I have to get up early anyway. You two go have fun.”
“The early bird gets the worm! Come on, Kane. You heard her,” she wraps her arm around his. “Let’s have some fun.”
She hooks her arm around him and leans in to whisper something in his ear. He shrugs on his coat, chuckles, and just like that, they are gone. I head ba
ck into the kitchen and stuff the picture deep in the trash along with my pregnancy test.
When I finally cry myself to sleep later that night, Kane is still out partying with Trixie.
Chapter 20
Kane
The bar is brimming with the usual crew, including Danny and a few of the boys from Vinnie’s team and even Harry. I try to ignore the proprietary way Trixie takes my arm and leads me around. She’s been going too far all night, but tonight is not the night to confront her.
“Not drinking?” Trixie says as she sidles up to the stool next to mine.
I hold up my beer. “Is this not a drink?”
“The Kane I know drinks whiskey on his birthday,” she says. She hands me a small glass of whiskey.
“This Kane wants to go home. I have a puppy to deal with, and Maddie,” I say.
“And a wife,” Trixie says. “You sound like a boring old man.”
“Birthdays make you older, Trixie,” I shrug. Truth is, I want to get home to Summer.
Trixie frowns and puts her arm around me. She’s drunk. “Danny, get over here,” she says.