by Angel Rose
“I’m sorry,” Michael said as he grabbed my hand affectionately.
“For what?” I replied staring into his green thwarted eyes.
“I don’t know, maybe we should stay in my apartment. I just didn’t want to start new life in a place where I’ve been with other women. What do you think?
He looked out of the window then faced me again.
I suddenly felt nauseous and made a face that said, “Ooh that’s tastes really bad.”
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Car sick, I need to get out of this cab right now, Michael,” I said anxiously.
Michael asked the cabby to stop at a diner at the corner. He paid the cab driver and I continued to become more nauseous so I walked into the diner and asked for a glass of water. Michael entered
and we sat down at a table. Michael ordered soup for me and he ordered steak and eggs. I felt as if I were coming down with the flu. My stomach was rumbling, twisting and turning.
“Do you feel better?”
“A little.”
“So, what are we going to do? Should we try the west side? Or stay in my apartment?” Michael asked broodingly.
I knew Dave could help us immediately. But Michael would shut me down in an instant. Dave new so many people including some top real estate agents in NYC.
“No. You’re right. I don’t want to start a new life in your apartment where you’ve slept with other women. You know Dave could help us Michael,” I said softly as I lowered my head.
“Why do you always have to mention his name? Why? Do you think I can’t find us a place to live?” he said, irritated as he squinted his eyes at me and shook his head.
“No, of course not, but, sometimes we need connections and Dave is just the person we need,” I said reassuringly as I touched his hand tenderly.
“Fine,” he said giving in to me, but not without a, ‘if looks could kill, I would be dead’ look.
As we waited for our food, I called Dave to ask him to find us an agent and let them know we were interested in renting an apartment on the west side. I stared at Michael as I made the phone call near the bar. I needed to stand and walk around. My stomach began twisting and turning again.
The same way it was for the last two weeks…every morning. Michael glared at me, making his eyebrows frown and his forehead crinkle up. He hated when I spoke to Dave or asked him for any
kind of favor. It was clear by the expression on his face that he was still not fond of him and I just wanted to know why. Why didn’t Michael like Dave? The waitress brought our food to the table,
and the smell of steak reached my nose, and it was as if the steak had been shoved down my throat with extra seasoning. I became even more nauseated.
“Dave, call me back when you find someone for us, thanks, bye,” I said then hung up quickly, placing a dry cracker in my mouth from the basket of bread on the table.
The amount of saliva in my mouth from feeling nauseated almost made me puke. I quickly swallowed and drank some water to wash down the saliva that nearly drowned me. I looked up at Michael, and he seemed to be in a better mood and really looked like he was enjoying his meal.
“Hungry today?”
“Yeah, I’m starving.”
He mixed his steak and eggs together and buttered his toast. I, on the other hand, played with my soup. Staring at his steak and egg mix almost made me gag at the table. I motioned for him to give me a piece of his toast.
“You know, I’m really not feeling well today. I think I have a bug. It’s been lingering for over a week now. I think I’m going to see the doctor this afternoon,” I said with urgency.
Michael looked up and glanced out of the window. He was drifting away from me, this meditative, out-in-space look, and it almost seemed as if he didn’t hear a word I said.
“Michael, did you hear me?” I repeated softly. He turned and looked at me.
“I’m finished, are you?” He asked. I nodded my head yes. “Let’s grab a cab to take you home,” he said.
We paid the waitress and he hailed a cab but the cab driver kept on going. God, I felt so sick. I just wanted to throw up, right there in the middle of the street. Michael stared down at me, reached out
and held both of my hands. I extended my neck to look up to him and he said, “Everything has been so perfect between us. This past month has meant so much to me.
Moving in together is just a stepping-stone to our happiness. I didn’t think it was possible. I don’t ever want it to change.”
Then he got down on one knee in the middle of the sidewalk and said,
“Jenesis, will you marry me?” He took a small box out of his jacket pocket and gave it to me.
I stared at him completely in shock and in awe. Déjà vu…sidewalk…bumping into passersby…He just asked me to move in with him and now…He’s proposing, right here, right now, in the middle
of New York City! I couldn’t believe it! My hands were trembling as I held the box with a tight grip. I looked around to see the people passing us by and smiling. One woman stopped waiting for
me to give him an answer. I looked at her and she smiled at me and motioned with her hand to answer him. Michael stood up.
“Jenesis, are you okay?” He asked as he looked around at the people embarrassed, waiting for me to give him an answer. Then he stared at me, his green eyes gleaming, his hand shaking in mine.
I thought to myself in that split second I had to answer him. This was the moment my father said that my knight and shining armor would never be faithful to me. What should I do? I loved Michael more than I loved myself.
“Yes, I’m fine, Michael, I love you so much. You’re the only person in the world I want to be with. Yes!”
We held each other tightly; he was squeezing me to the point where I almost couldn’t breathe. I stood on my tippy toes and he kissed me hard on the lips. The bystanders on the street began to clap and cheer. I was the happiest woman in the world. I loved him. I loved him the way I knew
no other woman could love him. I loved him the way my mother loved my father, unconditionally, and with every last breathe in her body, literally. I was so overcome with emotion that I didn’t
even feel nauseous anymore. Before we hailed a cab, he picked up some white orchids from the flower shop near the diner and gave them to me.
“Now, everything is complete,” he said smiling at me.
I stared at my ring finger as we drove in the cab on the way to my apartment. I had to share the news with Margaret right away, so I took a picture of the ring on my finger and sent it via text
message to Dave and Margaret. The ring was the most beautiful 2 carat round diamond nestled on a halo platinum setting. It was beautiful and so was he. I glanced over at him as he stared out of
the cab window, and then he turned to me and winked and held my hand tightly. I texted Margaret right away. My phone vibrated as a text message from Margaret appeared.
Today 11:15AM
Congratulations! Dave and I are so happy for you guys!
I hope you’re coming home soon so you can give me every detail about how he proposed! We love you! Margaret and Dave
We arrived at my apartment and walked into the building hand in hand. In love, and smiling and giggling for no reason except because…we were in love. We passed by Dave and Margaret’s apartment as we walked up the stairs.
“Shhh…I don’t want them to know we’re here or they’ll crash our private party,” I whispered as I giggled like a little girl walking up the stairs. I opened the door trying not to make too much noise.
Michael placed his hands around my waist shoving me in the apartment gently while tickling me from behind as he slammed the door shut with his foot.
“Shhh!” I laughed hysterically as he tickled me into the kitchen. “STOP!” I walked over to the fridge and took out a cold bottle of champagne. Michael jumped in front of me with two glasses clinking them together and laughing.
“Are you ready
to have the night of your life?” he said as he stood in front smiling with his ferocious, sexy stare.
“Where are we going?” I said playing it off. I knew exactly where we were going…straight into the bedroom.
“Nowhere, baby, here, right here.” He brushes his soft tongue against my lips. I grabbed his tongue with my mouth and suck on it gently. He cupped my face with his hands and said,
“We’re going to have a great life together…just you and me” Our eyes met and as he leaned in to kiss my lips, I felt sick to my stomach. I stepped back.
“What’s wrong?” He looked concerned.
“My stomach…this damn bug doesn’t want to go away.”
“Take some Pepto Bismol or something. That should take care of it.” I walked into the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet. The pink stuff…yuck. I swallowed a capful and then reached
over for my toothbrush to brush my teeth. I dabbed some toothpaste on it and raised the toothbrush to my mouth. I gagged immediately. Oh my God! Something’s wrong. My stomach was rumbling
and twisting. Jesus! Not now…I have so much to celebrate. I splashed cold water on my face. My fiancée was waiting for me in the bedroom…ready to revel and I was in the bathroom ready to
puke. I got myself together, rinsed my face, my mouth, and then gargled with mouthwash. I washed up and sprayed perfume everywhere. I needed to be with him tonight and I was going to, nauseous
or not. He was the best in bed, even though I would never know if anyone else was better. I didn’t care. I had him, and he was now mine, forever. It was time for him to take me heaven and he would
be the only one who could bring me down to Earth. Heaven on Earth, that’s how he makes me feel.
***
After a couple of days of searching for apartments after work, Michael and
I finally found a loft on the lower west side. It was perfect for us. I can’t believe how fast everything was going and how quickly I have trusted
Michael with all of my heart. It’s just never happened before.
I didn’t get to go to the doctor as I had planned that day Michael proposed to me and I still felt nauseous and was vomiting often throughout the day. I was beginning to worry and I thought that
I might be pregnant. I didn’t want to be pregnant. It wasn’t the right time. How could I even think of having an abortion with the man I love so much? I needed to get to the doctor ASAP.
I had to make an appointment with my family doctor right away. I hadn’t contacted Dr. Joe from Pennsylvania since I moved here to New York. I was hoping he was available and able to see me.
He worked at Mount Sinai hospital. Uncle Mike had given me a couple of numbers to some people he knew in New York and that included Lindsay’s daughter who studied at
NYU and Dr. Joe. I didn’t want to make an appointment with my gynecologist because it would have looked even more suspicious.
I called Mount Sinai and they transferred me to his office.
“I’d like to make an appointment with Dr. Joseph Leonard please” I asked nervously.
“Just a moment please.” I waited on the phone as I listened to the elevator music that was playing while I was on hold. “Ma’am.”
“Yes.”
“He has a cancellation. Can you come in today?”
“Yes.”
“Are you a new patient, because if you are you’ll have to wait until next week,” she said sternly.
“No, I’m not a new patient. They just haven’t transferred my files from
Pennsylvania yet.”
“No problem. Can you come in at four?”
“Yes.”
“Okay we’ll see you then. Bring your insurance cards.” She hung up the phone, and I felt relieved.
I waited patiently at the apartment to grab a cab and head out to Mount Sinai. I was so nervous I was pacing back and forth in the hallway. What was I going to tell Michael if I was pregnant? I had no idea what I was going to do. None.
I walked downstairs and hailed a cab. I was so anxious I wanted to throw up. My phone vibrated in my purse. It was a text message from Michael.
Hey baby, where’s my favorite girl? I called you at the apartment. Michael
I’m heading to the salon. I wanted to get a pedicure. I was thinking of cutting my hair.
J
Are you crazy? Don’t touch those beautiful black locks!
Michael
Ok…you twisted my arm. Where are you?
J
I’m in court. I got Tina Danielson’s alleged murderer out on bail. Damn! I’m good.
Michael
You’re the best! But, Jesus Michael, are you crazy? He’s dangerous!
J
Not to you he isn’t. I’ll see you at the apartment tonight. By the way they are sending the movers with your boxes to the apartment. I gave Margaret the keys. She’ll meet us there. I love you. See you later.
Michael
I love you too.
J
I arrived at Mount Sinai and paid the cab driver. I looked around making sure I didn’t see anyone I knew. I walked to the security desk and asked for Dr. Joe’s office. They directed me to the third
floor. I pressed for the elevator and waited patiently for it to arrive. My stomach was in knots not to mention I was so nauseous I could throw up in my mouth. The elevator finally opened and I
stepped in, holding my stomach and praying that the restroom was nearby when I got out. I walked to the reception area and wrote my name down on the clipboard. I found the restroom and went in.
I stood at the sink and gagged a little, but nothing came out. I placed a paper towel under the cold water and placed it on my forehead. I looked in the mirror and said to myself “you’re definitely
pregnant” and walked out. “Jenesis Heart.” I heard them call my name and I walked over to the receptionist.
“Insurance cards, please.” I opened my purse and pulled out my wallet. “Jenesis? Jenesis Heart?” I heard a man’s voice. I turned around to face him.
“Dr. Joe,” I said as Dr. Joe stood in front of me.
“Jenesis, what are you doing here?” he said, surprised, hugging me tightly and kissing me on the cheek.
“I live here.” I was so relieved to see him.
“Come on in.” He guided me through the double doors and into his office in the back. “I can’t believe you’re here. How are your parents?” he asked happily.
“They’re dead,” I whispered softly. He turned around and looked at me. His smile disappeared from his face as he shook his head.
“What do you mean?” he asked stunned.
“They were killed a couple of months ago in a car accident on route 209,” I said as my stomach winced.
“Oh my God, Jenesis, I’m so sorry.” He reached out to hug me, and I turned around and threw up on the floor.
“Are you okay?” he asked as he rubbed my back. I sat up and he gave me a tissue to wipe my mouth. He walked over to his desk and picked up the phone. “Cynthia, can you call John, I need
something cleaned up in my office.” He hung up the phone and walked me in to an examining room.
“Jen, what’s going on?” he asked.
“I don’t feel well. I’ve been throwing up, and I have a lot of pain in my stomach.”
“Any chance you’re pregnant?”
“Maybe, I have so much pain…here.” I placed my hand on the lower part of my belly.
“Here, lay down.” Dr. Joe pressed on my belly, and it was sore. “I’m going to take a urine sample and I’m going to call my colleague Dr. Kate to check you internally. She’s here at the hospital today,” he said as he took his cell phone out of his pocket and sent a text to the doctor. “She’ll be
here in a few minutes. Let’s see your urine test. Take this, wipe and pee. You know the routine.” He smiled.
I went to the bathroom, wiped, and peed in the cup just like he said. I glanced over at the mirror, heartbroken. I shou
ld have been more careful. I’ve been so careless when it came to sex and so has
Michael. We both lose our minds and now I’m paying the price. I hope I’m not pregnant. I handed Dr. Joe the urine sample and he placed the strip inside.
“Jenesis…you’re pregnant.” My worst fear…I was pregnant. My heart hit the floor and my stomach did somersaults. I remember that night I only had one or two condoms and we did it more
than once, plus, he used the pull out method when he didn’t feel like wearing one. What have I done? What was I going to do? A baby now will ultimately ruin this relationship and I just got
engaged. If he had commitment issues before, a baby would send him over the edge. We haven’t built that foundation yet to create a family. I was so upset that I was pregnant and I felt tormented
inside as to what I should do. I knew I could talk to Joe. He was always real and upfront with me, and with my mother, he told her a millions times to leave my father, and almost got into a fight
with him when he saw my mother with a black eye once. I needed to put my trust in someone right now and I needed his advice.
“Joe, I’m not ready to have a baby. I feel so terrible. What should I do?” I asked him crying uncontrollably, the tears flowing like a river down my face into my mouth. He held my hand and said,
“Let’s do a blood test and sonogram. Jen, it’s not the end of the world. Give your relationship a chance to be strong and grow. You can have children later in your marriage. I’ll make an
appointment with GYN for Friday. It will be over and done with in no time. Cut yourself some slack, you’re a smart young woman, there’s a time and a place for everything, get married. Enjoy your life with your husband first.”
I looked up at him whimpering. He wiped the tears off of my cheeks with the back of his hand and leaned his forehead against mine and whispered,
“You’re the catch of the century, Jenesis, look at you. You made a mistake, but you’re probably early in your pregnancy. We’ll draw some blood now, and I’ll make sure you get the result