She had the gall to shrug. ‘You have no idea what she did to us.’
‘I have every idea!’ Gian retorted.
‘Meaning?’
But Gian was not about to explain himself. ‘You know what, Ariana? I don’t need your drama.’
It felt like a kind of relief that he could finally walk away without the painful struggle with his demons he had faced earlier when considering how to draw a line under all that had happened between them.
Except Ariana Romano ran after him.
He didn’t want to hear her sobbing or begging for forgiveness, except Gian received neither. Instead he was tapped smartly on the shoulder and was somewhat surprised by the calm stare that met him when he turned around.
‘You should be thanking me, Gian.’
‘Thanking you?’
‘Absolutely,’ she responded. ‘You were about to give me my marching orders this morning, and you were fumbling for an excuse. I handed you this on a plate.’
‘You don’t know that.’
‘But I do.’ Ariana was certain, for she could clearly recall the heavy atmosphere and the absolute certainty that Gian had been about to end things. Well, she’d given him the perfect reason to now. ‘It isn’t a relationship you’re avoiding, Gian; it’s emotion.’
Ariana struck like a cobra, right to the heart of his soul. He looked at her and all he could see was the chaos she left in her wake. He thought of the knife edge he had grown up on, the eternal threat of disaster that had hung over his family, and the eternal calm he now sought.
‘Don’t worry, Gian,’ she said to his silence. ‘I’m out of here. You keep your cold black heart and I’ll carry right on.’
CHAPTER TWELVE
IT WOULD BE NICE, Ariana thought early the next morning, to pull the covers over her head as she nursed her first ever broken heart.
Officially broken.
She knew that since they had first made love she had been holding onto a dream. The fantasy that Gian would bend his rules for her and decide it was time to give love a chance...
Because it felt like love to Ariana.
Now she had to let go of that dream. Her mother called and then called again, but Ariana ignored it.
But then Stefano called and Ariana could never ignore a call from her twin...
‘There’s an extraordinary board meeting at nine,’ he told her.
‘Pass on my apologies,’ Ariana mumbled, but Stefano was having none of it. ‘We are to meet at the offices at eight,’ Stefano told her. ‘A driver has been ordered for you; he should be with you soon.’
‘Eight?’ Ariana checked.
‘Mamma wants to speak to the three of us before the board meeting.’
‘She’s coming to the offices?’ Ariana frowned. ‘But she hasn’t been there since...’
Since the news of her father and Mia’s affair had broken.
This was big, Ariana knew as she quickly showered, squeezing in eye drops to erase all evidence of tears. She selected a navy linen suit and ran the straightening iron through her hair, trying to look somewhat put-together while she pondered what was about to take place. Ariana arrived at Romano Holdings and took the elevator up to where her family were waiting for her.
Her mamma was as pale as she had ever seen her, and Stefano looked grey. She could barely bring herself to look at Dante, but when she did she saw the bruise beneath his eye and felt sick that it had come from her own hand.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said to Dante. ‘I just...’
‘I get it,’ Dante said, and gave her a hug. ‘Ariana, I know how confusing this has all been, but there’s something you need to hear, both you and Stefano...’ He turned to their mother. ‘It’s time, Mamma,’ he said.
This was big.
Gian knew that, because even as he tried to focus on his weekly planning meeting with Luna, little pings from his computer had him looking over. The press were gathered outside Romano Holdings, where an extraordinary meeting was being held, and in an unprecedented move Angela Romano was seen entering the building.
Gian watched as Ariana duly arrived in a silver car and he scanned the short piece of footage for a clue, a glimpse, as to what lay behind the mask she most certainly wore.
Her parting shot to him yesterday had seriously rattled him and he had spent most of the night simultaneously disregarding and dwelling on her words.
You keep your cold black heart and I’ll carry right on.
Yet he was struggling to carry on, knowing that Ariana must be suffering now. For the first time, Gian wanted more information on the details of a woman’s private life. He was fighting with himself not to call Ariana to see what was going on, how she was coping, what she knew...
Her brief appearance told him nothing. She was immaculate. Ariana really should be on the stage, for there was no hint of tension in her body language.
She wore a navy linen suit and her hair was smooth and tied back in a slick ponytail. She even paused and smiled her gorgeous red-lipped smile for the cameras.
‘This can wait,’ he told Luna, and wrapped up their morning meeting so he could focus on the news. ‘If you could just bring coffee.’
‘Of course.’
Throughout the morning, the little pings became more and more frequent for there was drama aplenty. Dante Romano and Mia were engaged to be married! Gian could not imagine that going down well with a certain hot-headed lady, but there Ariana was, still smiling for the cameras as she left the building and climbed into a car.
Ariana would come to him.
Of that Gian was certain.
Despite their exchange yesterday, Gian was quietly confident that Ariana would arrive in his office, because whenever there was drama in Ariana Romano’s life, inevitably Luna announced she was at his door and a mini-tornado would burst in.
‘Any messages from Ariana Romano?’ he checked with Luna.
‘None.’
‘If she arrives here,’ Gian said, ‘please send her straight through.’
Ariana did not arrive, though, for she refused to run to him.
The car was mercifully cool and, rather than stare ahead, Ariana looked out of the window and smiled at the cameras as if the drama surrounding Dante and Mia hadn’t affected her in the slightest. In fact, their engagement was the merest tip of an iceberg that had just been exposed to her in all its blinding glory. Ariana was having trouble taking it all in.
‘Home?’ the driver checked.
‘No...’ She hesitated, not quite ready for the emptiness of her apartment and the noise of her own thoughts. ‘Just drive, please.’
She took a gulp of water from a chilled bottle the driver handed to her and tried to come to terms with the fact that her life, her childhood—in fact, all she had ever known—had been built on a lie. Her parents’ marriage, of which she’d been so proud, had been a sham. They’d both had other partners and the marriage had been in name only, so much so that she and Stefano had been IVF babies.
It felt as if she was the very last to know.
They drove for ages. It was rush hour in Rome, all the workers spilling out, some rushing for transport, others taking their time for a coffee, or to sit in a bar.
She felt like an alien.
A stranger in her own body.
As they passed La Fiordelise she had never been more tempted to ask the driver to pull in, to push through the brass doors and escape to the cool calmness of Gian’s office and unburden herself, as she would usually do. Except, thanks to their argument yesterday, that refuge was denied her now.
Instead, Ariana asked to be dropped off where they had walked that lonely night. She wandered there, too shocked and stunned for tears. It was a sticky late spring day and she drifted a while, ignoring the buzz of her phone.
Finally she glanced at the endless missed calls.
/>
He came first and last.
Gian.
Mamma.
Gian.
Gian.
Mamma.
Gian.
Stefano.
Gian.
She had nothing to say to any of them, at least not until she had gathered her thoughts. Eventually, drained from walking and with a headache creating a pulse of its own, she wandered listlessly home.
‘Hey,’ she said to the doorman, who was dozing behind his cap. She took the elevator up, jolting when she saw a very familiar face. Gian was leaning against the wall, but came to his full height as she approached.
Her heart did not lurch in hope or relief. In fact, it sank, for right now Gian felt like another problem to deal with, another person to hide her true self from.
For her true self was hurting and dreadfully so—and her emotions were clearly too much for him.
‘What are you doing here, Gian?’
‘You didn’t respond to my calls...’
‘No.’ She didn’t even look at him. ‘Because I was not in the mood to speak to anyone. How did you get up here?’ She let out a mirthless laugh as she answered her own question. ‘I really am going to fire that doorman.’
‘I told him we were friends.’
‘Friends.’ She let out a mirthless laugh at his description of them. ‘Well, however you described yourself, the doorman shouldn’t have let you up.’ She opened her door and her words dripped sarcasm as she invited him in. ‘Come through, friend.’
She did not rush around making him welcome or offering a drink. Instead, she dropped her bag and headed straight to the kitchen, where she went to a drawer and took out two headache tablets and poured a glass of water.
For herself.
Gian watched as she downed the tablets and wondered how she still managed to look so put-together, even though he was sure her world had just been turned upside down. ‘I saw you leaving Romano Holdings...’ He tried to open the conversation, but Ariana didn’t respond.
She was in no mood for conversation, and for once she didn’t fill the silent gaps, offer drinks, or make him welcome. In fact, it was Gian who finally broke the tense silence.
‘What happened?’
‘We’ve been having a family catch-up and filling each other in on a few things.’ She had been holding it in all day, sitting through revelation after revelation, and then a formal board meeting, always having to find a way to smile. ‘Dante and Mia are expecting. That’s for family’s ears only,’ Ariana needlessly warned, for she knew, because of his damned discretion, she might as well be telling it to the wall. ‘There is to be a marriage in May, so that makes two Romano weddings.’ Her voice rose and she almost let out an incredulous laugh, that both her brothers, who had always been indifferent to marriage, would soon both have all she had ever craved for herself.
But there was far more on her mind than her brothers. ‘Gian, there’s a reason I didn’t take your calls. I have nothing to say to you. Nothing polite anyway.’ Her confusion at the unfolding events was starting to morph into anger and she turned accusing eyes on him. ‘Did you know?’ she asked, her eyes narrowing into two dangerous slits.
‘I told you—’
‘I’m not talking about Dante and Mia.’ She put down the glass with such a bang that he thought it might shatter, but Gian didn’t even blink. ‘Did you know that my father was gay?’
‘Yes.’
‘For how long?’
‘Since I took over the hotel, I guess.’
‘You guess?’ she sneered.
‘I wasn’t taking notes, Ariana.’
‘And what about my mother’s affair?’
‘I knew about that too. Look, your parents didn’t sit me down and tell me, but given the nature of my work, they rightfully expected discretion. I would never gossip or break a confidence. I didn’t even tell Dante and he is my best friend...’
‘We were lovers!’ Finally she shouted. Finally a sliver of her anger slipped out. ‘I had every right to know.’
‘Oh, so in your perfect world the fact we were sleeping together meant we should have started holding hands and gazing into each other’s eyes and sharing?’ He spat the last word with disdain. ‘Tell me, Ariana, when was I supposed to tell you? The first time we made love? The second...?’
‘If we were ever to have a relationship—’ She stopped herself then, her nose tightening as she fought to suppress the tears building in her eyes, because a relationship, a real one, a close one, was the very thing he didn’t want. ‘You could have at least told me as a friend.’
‘I wanted to,’ he admitted. ‘But it was not my place. They were not my secrets to tell. I tried to get you to speak to your father, that day of the interview—’
‘You didn’t try hard enough then.’ Her anger, however misplaced, she aimed directly at him. ‘For two years I felt pushed away by Papà. Now I find out that he just wanted to live out his days in peace with Roberto. My God! I was led to blame Mia. I was goaded and encouraged to hate her by my mother, just because she didn’t want the truth getting out.’
‘Ariana...’ He tried to calm her down. ‘Your mother came from a time—’
‘I don’t care!’ She swore viciously in Italian and told him what rubbish he spoke. ‘I’m his daughter. I deserved to know...’ He crossed over as she swallowed down a scream that felt as if it had been building since her father died. ‘If I’d known the truth, I could have spent quality time with him. Had you told me...’
She was almost hysterical and for once he was not trying to keep a lid on the drama or stop a commotion. It was not for that reason that he pulled her into his arms, but to comfort her. But she thumped at his chest and then scrunched his perfect shirt in her fist, knowing it wasn’t his fault, knowing that the truth could only have come from her father.
‘It was all just a farce...’ She was starting to cry now in a way she never had before. Angry, bitter tears, and Gian held her as she drowned in his arms. ‘I was so proud of their marriage, but it was just a sham. Even Stefano and I were conceived by IVF to keep up the charade...’ All she had just learned poured out in an unchecked torrent he allowed to flow. ‘They didn’t really want us...’ It was then Gian intervened.
‘No.’
‘Yes!’ she insisted. ‘It was all just a sham.’
‘You were wanted,’ he insisted, but Ariana would not be mollified.
‘You don’t know that...’
‘But I do.’ He was holding her arms and almost shaking her in an effort to loosen her dark thoughts before they took hold. ‘I know for a fact you were wanted and loved.’
‘Oh, what would you know?’ Ariana responded. ‘What would a man like you know about love?’
‘Nothing!’
She stilled in his arms at the harsh anguish in his voice.
‘I know nothing about love!’ He hated to tell her, for Gian was loath to share, but he would expose his soul if it saved her from the dark hole she was sinking into. ‘I wasn’t wanted, Ariana. I was a regretful mistake and they never let me forget that fact. When Eduardo caved to their lifestyle, I brought myself up. I could see my mother’s loathing on the rare occasions she actually looked me in the eye. You know how your mother called me a beggar? Well, I was one. I walked the streets at night, just for conversation, for contact...’
Her stomach clenched in fear at the thought of a child out there alone.
‘They didn’t even notice or care that I was gone. You want the truth, Ariana? I wanted to disappear...’
She couldn’t breathe. So passionate was his revelation that there was not even the space to take in the air her lungs craved.
‘No!’ she refuted. It wasn’t that she thought he lied, more that she could not bear his truth.
‘Yes,’ he said, ‘so while I have never known love, I
know what it looks like, and I know how much you were wanted and loved...’
They were the words she was desperate to hear, but she wanted to hear them from him. She was so desperate that she managed to twist her mind to pretend that Gian was saying he wanted her, that he loved her.
‘Gian...’ His name was a sob, a plea that she could hold onto the dream that those words were for her. Ariana honestly did not know who initiated their kiss but it was as if he read her cry in his name. For a man who knew nothing of love, he knew a lot about numbing pain. The room went dark then as their mouths melded, hot angry kisses to douse the pain. As his mouth bruised hers, as their teeth clashed, Ariana reacted with an urgency she had never known.
She kissed him as if it were vital.
And Gian kissed her to a place where only they remained. His hands were deft, shedding her jacket and lifting her top, pushing his hands up and caressing her breasts through her flimsy bra, his palms making her skin burn, then leaving her smouldering as he tackled her skirt.
He scalded her with desire, his hands hitching up her skirt so impatiently that she heard the lining rip. And Ariana, who had thought desire moved more slowly, could not begin to comprehend that she might simply seize what she craved.
He offered oblivion in the salty taste of his skin as she undid his shirt and buried her face in him. He offered escape as she unbuckled his belt and trousers.
‘Ariana,’ he warned, for he had not come for this. He had come to offer more, yet it was a poor attempt at a protest for he was lifting her onto the bench and tearing at her knickers as their mouths found each other again.
She had not known that the world could feel empty and soulless one moment and then find herself wrapped in his arms and drowning in the succour he gave.
He spread her thighs and she let out a shout as he pushed inside her. It was not a cry of pain but of relief, for here she could simply escape and be.
The Italian's Forbidden Virgin (Mills & Boon Modern) (Those Notorious Romanos, Book 2) Page 13