Grace mumbled an excuse of being exhausted and headed for her room. She shut the door before she allowed the hurt to penetrate her being. The tears flowed and she slid down to the floor, leaning against the door.
Grace started when she heard a soft knock on the door. “Grace.” Xander’s whisper brought tears at a faster pace.
She bit her knuckle and willed herself to stop crying.
“Grace…open the door.”
She stood and wiped the tears away. “What do you want, Xander? I’m tired and ready for bed.”
“I don’t know what I said to upset you, but I want to talk about it.” Grace could feel his presence penetrating through the door.
“Not now.”
“Gracie…it sounds like you’ve been crying. I’m coming in.”
Grace scrambled to her feet and moved away from the door. She wiped her eyes and prayed that the tears would stop. She stiffened when Xander’s arms came around her. She tried to pull away, yet felt her body relaxing as he pulled her back against his chest.
“Talk to me, Gracie,” Xander whispered into her ear.
“It’s nothing. You made it clear how you felt and you want this done with so you can move on with your life.” She pushed away from him and walked to the window, looking out over the property.
“What are you talking about?”
“You said we would do what we need to do to get through the next two years and then we can have our lives back. You want your life back, I get it.”
Xander chuckled. “God, woman, you totally took that wrong.”
Grace turned. “You’re going to stand there and laugh at me now? Please, Xander, just go.”
Xander stepped over in front of her. “No. Not until we talk about this.”
“There is nothing to talk about.” Grace shook her head.
“I said we can have our life back…our meaning you and me, hopefully together.”
Grace closed her eyes. It was just too much to take. It killed her to think Xander would walk out of her life for good, but it scared her just as much to think they could make a life together. “Let’s not do this tonight, please. I just can’t.”
Xander kissed her forehead gently. “I’ll see you in the morning, but we need to talk this through at some point.”
Grace stood there with her eyes closed until she heard the door shut quietly. Hope. Did she dare be hopeful of a future with Xander?
Chapter 22
Xander couldn’t sleep and paced his room until four in the morning. Needing to get out of the house, he grabbed his coat and headed for the barn. The stalls needed to be readied for the arrival of the horses.
As he took inventory, his mind wandered to Grace. He didn’t know how to convince her that things could work between them. Why didn’t she have any faith in herself or in them? He stopped suddenly when he realized that there was a trail of straw on the floor. None had been put down yet. It was all up in the loft.
He followed the trail to the stairs to the loft. He started up them slowly. Nothing really seemed out of order, except a few bales were knocked over to the side. He glanced around and saw nothing else out of the ordinary.
He didn’t give it another thought as he started to the house. A few hours had passed and he was in dire need of coffee. Xander let himself in the backdoor into the kitchen and proceeded to set up the coffee maker to start the magical brew that would kick his brain into gear.
“Why?” Grace’s voice broke through the silence.
“Why what?” Xander turned to face Grace standing in the doorway, eyes blazing.
“Did you have to remove all my pictures in the living room? I know you wanted me to change things, but what…I wasn’t quick enough for you?”
“What the hell are you talking about?” Xander leaned against the counter, waiting for the crazy to start flying. Lately Grace had been all over the place with her emotions.
“Don’t give me that look.” Grace turned and stormed from the room. Xander followed her into the living room. “Look around. What do you see?”
Xander’s eyes swept over the room. At first glance not a thing was out of place. He walked around the room and looked closer. Every picture of Grace and Abigail were gone from the room. There were random pictures placed about, but nothing personal. Had Xander saw this room first, he would have assumed Grace had changed it – had made it her own.
“You think I took the pictures down?” Xander sat down on the couch and watched Grace as she paced about.
“Didn’t you?”
“No. Why would I?”
Grace stopped and stared at him. “You wanted the pictures gone. You told me to make this room my own. Well, this isn’t making it my own. I never would have totally depersonalized my living room.”
Xander shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you. I didn’t do it, Gracie.”
“Stop calling me that!” Grace turned and fled up the stairs.
Xander sighed. The barn and the living room? Who would be moving things around if it was just him and Grace in the house? He knew it wasn’t him and lately Grace seemed to have lost her marbles the way she was all over the place. Could it be that all the changes had made her a bit unstable and she just wasn’t remembering things? Or was she doing it and just trying to scare Xander off?
The questions ran through his mind as he returned to the kitchen to get some coffee. It wasn’t even a possibility to think about it until he had some caffeine. Pouring a cup, he looked out the window to the barn. He sipped his coffee and contemplated the changes that had been made.
He pulled out his cell phone and dialed the number of the only one that might know what was going on. He made an appointment for later in the day with Bob the lawyer. Didn’t he say he had worked for her family for years? He would be the only one who could tell him if this was normal behavior for Grace under the stress of all the changes that had come to her life since the death of Abigail.
He drained his coffee and started upstairs. He turned at the top towards Grace’s room. He stopped outside the door and raised his hand to knock. He paused and listened. There was no sound coming from inside the room. He shook his head and turned towards his own room. If she wanted space, she was going to get it. He wanted answers and it was obvious he wasn’t going to get them from her.
* * *
Grace paced her room. Was she going insane? She knew she didn’t move the pictures, yet Xander didn’t seem to know anything about it. How could this be happening? Was she about to have a nervous breakdown? She flopped on her bed and stared at the ceiling. She missed her mother terribly through this – of course it was because of Abigail’s wishes that she was under such stress.
It was almost too much to bear. The memories of her last year of college came flooding back to her. She had been so stressed out over school, and setting up student teaching and worrying about not graduating with honors and if she didn’t, how upset her mother would be that she had almost lost her mind with a nervous breakdown. She had lost three months of school and had to postpone her student teaching. She had eventually graduated with honors and Mom had been proud of her. But the feelings were the same – feelings of inadequacy, failure and doubting herself at every turn.
She needed to find a way to reduce her stress and fast or she was going to end up in the crazy house. Just hearing that word coming from Xander almost sent her over the edge. Was she really that close to losing it all? Where were the pictures of her and Mom? Who took them? Did she?
Those months she took off from college had been filled with blackouts and blank memories. She worried now she was regressing back into the unknown. She needed to get a grip and find out how to control this stress. She couldn’t afford to lose her mind. She needed to get this business venture up and running with Xander, without him questioning her mindset and whether or not she was stable. Stable was not at all what she felt at the moment.
Grace turned towards the door and hesitated. She needed to figure out what happened to the pic
tures that had disappeared from the living room. If she could find them, she might be able to figure why Xander took them. She opened the door with renewed determination. As she started down the stairs, she heard the roar of Xander’s motorcycle leaving the driveway. Fine, let him leave for the day. It would give her the peace and quiet she needed.
Chapter 23
Xander pulled up in front of the lawyer’s office. Bob had been very vague on the phone, but Xander hoped with a face to face conversation, Bob would be more forthcoming with any information he needed. He sighed as he started for the door. He had a feeling this wasn’t going to be easy.
Xander sat in a chair in the waiting room. Bob’s secretary had been very clear it would be a little bit before he was available. Xander wondered if this was a ploy to avoid this whole conversation.
“Sebastian, what can I do for you?” Bob held out his hand in greeting.
Shaking the lawyer’s hand, Xander made a split second decision to play along with the coy comment. “Well, just some quick questions about some history that might help us with what is going on in the house?”
“What kind of history?” Bob moved around his desk and sat down, gesturing for Xander to take a seat.
“Well, any paranormal activity, any other issues with Grace, such as mental instability?” Xander smiled, keeping the mood light.
“What? No, of course not to either. Why would you ask that?”
Xander crossed his legs. “Well, there seems to be some things that have just up and moved themselves.”
“What kind of things?” Bob sat forward.
“Straw bales tripped over, some pictures taken from the living room, and the basement had been tossed.” Xander studied Bob’s face carefully. No expression, too neutral. “What would you know about that?”
“Not a thing. Sounds like a practical joke.” Bob leaned back in his chair and kept eye contact with Xander.
“Come on, really? A practical joke? Grace doesn’t seem like the type to do pranks, and she was too upset with the pictures gone this morning.”
“I don’t know. Was there something specific you thought I could tell you?”
Xander sighed in frustration. “What is going on with Grace? I know she showed up here to talk to you about Abigail’s letters and now things are just weird.”
“Look, there is nothing that is being hidden from you, if that is what you are thinking. She did ask about the letters and I’m sure she told you it was your father who wrote them. Other than that, Grace has had a pretty much normal life with the typical issues between mom and daughter that most girls have.” He paused and cleared his throat. “She had a bit of a tough time in college, but it was nothing but stress and she’s none the worse for it.”
“What kind of tough time?”
“That’s something that you would have to ask her.” Bob stood to indicate their meeting was over. “How are things going between you two, anyway?”
Xander stood and shook Bob’s hand. “Fine.” The lie unsettled Xander. He didn’t want to admit it, but this was going to be a huge obstacle to overcome.
He left the room more frustrated than when he arrived. Something was going on and he wanted to know what it was. Once on his motorcycle, he turned towards the coast – the ride he had taken Grace on the first time she rode his bike with him. He lost himself to the hum of the motor. As he became one with the bike, his mind drifted to the time since he had reconnected with Grace. How he longed for the time when they first met and were getting to know each other – before she realized he was a Stevens. He would do anything to change where he came from.
He pulled off the road and stared down at the ocean. The waves mesmerized him and he let each wave mentally wash over him and take away the stress. He smiled at the memory of Grace’s eyes lighting up at the sight here. Her features had softened and she had immediately let down her guard, as brief as that had been.
This was where they needed to come to talk. The sound of the waves, the sight of the blue-green lapping at the sand below, was the perfect spot for both of them to relax and let their guards down and really talk to each other. With renewed determination, Xander turned the bike towards home – funny he was thinking of it as home – and the excitement to see Grace once again overtook him.
Chapter 24
Grace wandered around the living room, opening every drawer and cabinet. Still not finding the pictures, she moved on to the foyer and the closet. She searched through the jackets, the boxes on the shelf—nothing. She shut the door with a bit more force than she intended and groaned. Where could they be? Where would Xander have put them?
She paced around the foyer and stopped in front of the stairs before continuing to pace. She stopped two more times in between pacing at the stairs. Would he have put them in his room? She started up the stairs and stopped halfway. Could she go through his room before he got back? Did she really want to?
She had wanted to believe that Xander was different from other guys. He had seemed pretended to be so open and honest. She shook her head. There was no other explanation. Xander had to be the one who moved the pictures. Squaring her shoulders, she took the stairs two at a time and ran down the hallway to Xander’s door. It was shut and she hesitated before turning the knob.
She glanced around. It was a lot cleaner than she expected. Not a thing out of place, clothes hung up neatly in the closet. The closet door was open, but everything was neat and orderly. She stepped inside and listened. Still no sound of the motorcycle coming back. She gave a little prayer that she would hear it. She definitely didn’t want to Xander catching her in his room. She tiptoed to the end of his bed. She giggled at herself, trying to be so quiet when no one was there to hear her.
She laid a hand on the blanket folded at the foot of the bed and closed her eyes. She had fallen for Xander, fallen harder for him than she had ever done before. She shook her head and backed out of the room. She couldn’t do it. She wanted to believe in him, to trust him and this would only cause problems, even if he never found out. She turned towards her room as she heard the motorcycle coming up the driveway. Whew! She finally made a good decision.
“Grace!” Xander’s voice broke through her thoughts as the front door slammed shut.
She moved to the top of the stairs. “I’m right here.”
She looked down as he approached the bottom of the stairs and looked up at her. His hair was messed up from his helmet. His cheeks were flushed and her heart skipped a beat.
“Let’s pack a picnic and take a ride up the coast. We can enjoy the sunset over the ocean.”
“Seriously? Just yesterday you were calling me insane and now you want me to go out with you?”
Xander ran his fingers through his hair. “Look, we need to talk and I think we could do a lot better if we were out of this house.” He turned away and then turned back. “Please, Gracie…”
She stared down the stairs at him. He looked like a lost soul just standing there, his eyes pleading with her to say yes. “Fine.”
Her heart beat faster as a smile lit up his face. “Great. I’ll pack up something for us. Bring a sweatshirt. It will be cold on the way back.”
She nodded, but realized he had already turned towards the kitchen. She shook her head as she turned towards her room to change.
She tugged on a pair of jeans and t-shirt. Yanking open her closet door, she reached up to the shelf to grab a sweatshirt. Her fingers brushed something hard. What is that? Grabbing her small step stool, she stood upon it to see the shelf. Pushed back, under her sweatshirt, was a stack of framed pictures. As she pulled out the top one, she gasped realizing they were the pictures from the living room that had disappeared. Had she put them here? No, she couldn’t be having blackouts again.
She pushed the frame back onto the shelf. Grabbing her sweatshirt, she closed her closet door. She frantically tried to figure out how she would have taken the pictures and had no recollection. Even when she was having the black outs, she hadn’t taken thin
gs. Mostly just showed up at places that she had no memory of. Berating herself for allowing the stress to get to her, she vowed to make a doctor’s appointment and get to the bottom of this. But tonight, she was going to just enjoy Xander’s company – away from the house and the inheritance and any ill feelings she might have at the moment. She wanted to just let go and enjoy the night for what it was.
Neither spoke while Xander filled his saddle bags with the food he had packed. The silence continued while Grace put on a helmet and settled behind him. Once the motorcycle was running, Xander patted her leg and ran his hand slowly down her calf before starting down the driveway. Grace knew it was his way of reassuring her, knowing the motorcycle made her a bit nervous and she was grateful for his kindness. Every time she wanted to think negative of him, he would do something like this – something generous and sincere that made her question her own doubts of him.
Grace found herself relaxing as she leaned against Xander’s back and held on loosely. She closed her eyes and just enjoyed the hum of the bike and the feel of his hard muscles moving as he controlled the bike. She sighed softly and allowed herself to give into the “what if’s” running through her mind. What if Xander chose to stay after the two year period? What if Xander fell in love with her like she was starting to do?
She opened her eyes and took in the scenery. Xander had turned onto a side road that Grace had never gone down before. It curved around the coast and out onto a peninsula where a lighthouse came into view.
As Xander shut off the bike and the sound quieted, the waves crashing on the rocks surrounding them washed over Grace. Her lips turned up in a soft smile as she closed her eyes and just listened.
“Ready?” Xander’s soft voice broke her daydreaming.
A Fine Line Page 11