Just as I finished and helped her up, Romeo came barreling through the door.
Harmony smiled from ear to ear as she pulled the straps of her dress back up and told him what a good boy he was. Then she asked him if he wanted chicken, to which he barked happily.
Her brows waggled as she asked me, “Are you hungry now?”
“Starving.”
Her smile grew wider as she explained all the sides she’d brought and where she wanted to set up the picnic. I tried to tell myself that nothing had changed, that this wasn’t real. It wasn’t forever. But as we sat, looking over the pond, talking and laughing, I was having a really hard time believing that was true.
Chapter 24
Harmony
“No matter where ya ride to, that’s where you are.”
~ Loretta Reed
“Are you going to talk to him?” Cara asked as she sipped on her root beer float.
I took a healthy drink of my second vodka and cranberry of the night. “Why should I?”
“Because you both look miserable and it’s even depressing Romeo.”
I glanced down and saw that Romeo did look like he needed to be put on suicide watch. But, I was pretty sure that it had more to do with the fact that he was at a party filled with food, and no one was feeding him.
Against my better judgment, I glanced over to where Hud was holding up the wall on the opposite side of the hall. He hadn’t moved from that spot in over half an hour. He did look pretty miserable.
Part of me wanted to go make sure he was okay, but then my self-respect smothered that part with a pillow. Even if I threw my self-esteem to the wind, it’s not like he wanted to talk to me. After I’d left the ranch on Wednesday, I was sure that I’d made it past the thirty foot security gates that he kept around his emotions. But, boy howdy, had I been wrong with a capital W.
Not only had he not returned my texts—again—for three days, I’d been at his parents’ anniversary party for two hours and he hadn’t said one word to me. I was done. As much as I wanted to believe that there was actually a heart beneath that badge, I knew now there wasn’t.
I still wasn’t sure what the night at my house had been about, but at this point I just had to chalk it up to a midlife crisis or something. That is, if midlife crises cause people to go all Shakespeare and talk about how a smile is the only thing that gets them through the darkness.
Damn. Just thinking about him saying those things made me go all weepy.
Lifting my drink to my lips, I tilted my head back and downed the fruity beverage. “I’m going to get another one. Do you want round three?”
Cara shook her head as a yawn claimed her. “No. Two root beers is my limit. I think I might actually grab Trace and head out. I get so tired so quick now.”
“That’s ’cause you’re growing a human in there.” I said, reaching over and rubbing her still-flat stomach.
“I know…it’s so crazy. I almost can’t believe it.” She looked down as a smile spread on her face. Then, looking up, she snapped her fingers like she’d just remembered something. “Oh! Do you know if your mom was able to find the linens?”
Cara and Trace’d decided to get married at my parents’ renovated barn and, thankfully, since my mom threw several parties a year, we had a lot of the necessities most people had to order from a party supply shop.
“She did. We found everything.”
My mom and I had spent the entire afternoon rummaging through the storage unit, trying to locate the tablecloths, runners, and chair coverings. She’d grilled me mercilessly about my desperate need for her chicken, but I’d just told her it was a thank you to Hud for making sure I didn’t end up on the side of the highway in an orange vest.
She wasn’t buying it, but there wasn’t a lot she could do about it. Or that I could do about it.
All my life, my brothers had talked about girls being so complicated, but in my experience, guys were the ones who earned that title. Hud gave me more mixed signals than a broken traffic light.
“Call me tomorrow. We can go visit Lilah together.” Cara hugged me before heading over to Trace.
I nodded. Destiny, JJ, and the baby had stayed home tonight because JJ didn’t want to expose Lilah to this many people or germs. He also thought it was too much, too soon for Destiny. He’d threatened to sit on her if she didn’t rest more.
It was sweet to see my brother step up and take care of his family. I’d been proud of him when he’d gotten drafted by the Waves. I’d been proud of him when he’d become the starting pitcher. I’d been proud of him when he’d won the World Championship and been named MVP, but none of those combined came close to the amount of pride I had for him as a dad and husband.
Now, as I watched Trace pull Cara into his arms the second she stepped next to him, that same pride washed over me. I couldn’t hear what she said to him, but he kissed her on the forehead and quickly ushered her out through the crowd, ignoring everyone who tried to slow them down with goodbyes. He was following in JJ’s footsteps and I couldn’t be happier for my brothers and for my friends.
That’s what I wanted. Someone who insisted that I stay home and rest and who was overprotective of our baby. Someone who kissed my forehead and took me home when I was tired. Who cared more about my wellbeing than a room full of friends and family.
“That’s the look.” Hud’s deep voice sounded beside me and I jumped in my chair.
I spun around and saw him casually standing next to Romeo. “What?”
“The look that proves you’re a romantic,” he said, just as casually as if we were nothing more than old friends shooting the shit.
“Are you serious right now?” I stood, suddenly wishing I’d worn my heels. If I had, I would’ve at least come to his shoulder. As it was, in my boots, the top of my head barely reached his chest. Not to mention, these boots had memories attached to them thanks to a certain roll in the hay…or, I guess, lay on the hay.
“Yep, that’s the look.”
“I don’t mean about the look!” I hadn’t meant to yell, but he was just so damn frustrating.
Hud’s eyes closed and he rubbed the bridge of his nose. I looked around and saw that my outburst had garnered the attention of the entire room.
I smiled and waved at our audience as I spoke through my teeth, not moving my lips, “We need to talk.”
“Follow me,” he snapped before turning and heading out the back door.
Romeo got up and started trailing behind his alpha leader.
Traitor.
Hud was holding the door for me, and as I stepped through it, my bare shoulder brushed against his chest. A shiver danced down my spine and I cursed under my breath. How could I expect loyalty from my dog when my own body turned on me with just a single touch?
I made it two steps into the back parking lot before spinning around, ready to give Hud a piece of my mind. My mind, however, short-circuited when I found myself face-to-face with his broad chest. On instinct, I lifted my hands and they landed on the muscled planes of his pecs as his arm wrapped around me.
We both stilled. Not moving. I didn’t know the reason for his mannequin impersonation, but mine was born out of the overwhelming need to be close to him. No matter how big of a game I talked, how many times I told myself I was done, how many times I determined not to put myself out there, I still wanted, still needed him.
It sucked. Big time.
I closed my eyes, luxuriating in the impression of his hand on my lower back as it burned into my mind. I inhaled, letting the smell of leather and soap fill my senses. I leaned into the sensation of his heart beating beneath my palm, memorizing the pounding rhythm.
We stood there, motionless, for so long that when he stepped back, I opened my eyes and it felt like I was coming out of a haze.
“You wanted to talk.”
Damn. Where was all that anger I’d been feeling just moments ago? It had all drained out of me the second I was in Hud’s arms.
“What i
s going on between us?”
I figured starting there couldn’t hurt. Best case, he answers me and we have a meaningful dialogue that sheds light on the situation. Worst case, he gives me some asinine answer that would cause me to muster up that good ole’ righteous indignation that escaped me now.
“Nothing,” he answered flatly.
Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner.
“Bullshit!” I yelled.
His left brow lifted slightly, but he remained quiet.
“That’s a lie and you know it.” I poked my finger into his chest and it felt like I hit steel. Maybe he really was Superman. Maybe that’s why he didn’t want us to be together, because he was leading a double life.
He stepped back and my hand fell to my side. “Is that it? Because I need to get back to my parents’ party?”
“Is that it?” Had he lost his mind? “No. That’s not it. There is something going on between us. Just because you can turn it off and on like a faucet doesn’t meant that it’s not there.”
He scrubbed his hands over his face, and as sad as it was, I was happy to see even that much emotion from him.
“Do you love me?” I hadn’t meant to ask that question, but for some reason it felt like this was a now or never moment.
He lowered his arms and stared at me. I could see that something was going on behind his honey gaze, but I had no idea what it was.
“Do. You. Love. Me?” I repeated as tears filled my eyes. “It’s a simple question, Hud.”
I knew there was a really good chance his answer was about to take a weed whacker to my heart, but at this point I would rather pick up the pieces of my shattered emotions than stay on this roller coaster ride to hell.
His hands flexed at his sides. “It’s not that simple.”
Normally, a ridiculous response like that would have my arms flying up in the air as I yelled that it was that simple. But, for some reason, I felt an eerie calm. Maybe it was because, for the first time in a long time, I knew exactly what I wanted in my life… and he was standing in front of me. I wanted to marry Hud. I wanted to have his babies. I wanted to spend every day for the rest of my life with the man who could frustrate me faster than anyone, and who made me happier than anyone.
As tears started falling down my face, I smiled as I repeated the question. “Do you love me?”
He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.”
He turned to leave, but I rushed around him and blocked the door. He stopped up short, like he was scared to even touch me.
“Yes it does. It does matter.”
“Harmony, move.”
“I told you that only works for sex stuff,” I sniffed.
The corners of his lips turned up, but then the tortured look was back in his eyes and he lifted his arms, running his fingers through his hair. Without saying another word he started out towards the back parking lot.
“Hud!” I called after him.
When he didn’t even slow down, I went after him and grabbed his arm. He stopped but didn’t turn around.
Not knowing what else to say, I asked, “Why doesn’t it matter if you love me or not?”
“Because…” His voice was raw, tortured, and even after he’d been a colossal asshole, I still wanted to reach out and comfort him. But I didn’t. Because he was a colossal asshole.
“Because?” I prompted.
He turned and his expression was unreadable. “Because you’re not a forever girl.”
I had never been punched in the gut. Until now. That’s what his words did to me. They socked me right in the solar plexus.
I was stuck between shock and horror. Anger and devastation. Grief and self-pity. But I didn’t let him see any of that. There was no way I would ever let him see that he affected me again.
Pasting a smile on my face, I held my head high. “What is ‘Things you never say to a woman’ for a thousand, Alex?”
After my Jeopardy-inspired comeback, I turned on my heel and walked as fast as my boots would take me. Romeo fell in line beside me and as I looked down at him with tears streaming down my face, he licked my hand.
I may not have the man, but at least I had the dog.
Chapter 25
Hudson
“You can’t unsay a cruel thing.”
~ Loretta Reed
The second the words were out of my mouth, I knew I’d fucked up. But did I do anything about it? No. I stood there, watching the woman I loved—the only woman I’d ever loved—walk away. I was paralyzed by what had just taken place. It took me a good ten minutes to pull my head from my ass and go after her.
And now I couldn’t find her.
She hadn’t gone back into the party. She wasn’t at her house. Her phone was going straight to voicemail. I stopped by her parents’, they must’ve been still at the party. I checked the wishing well that sat in the center of town, no sign of her. I stopped down by the river, but the only people there were kids partying. I even took my life into my own hands and went to Cara’s and Destiny’s, but they said they hadn’t seen her. They also threatened me and told me that they didn’t care if I was the law—if I hurt their friend, they would hurt me. Badly.
My hands flexed on the wheel as I drove through the small downtown area scanning for any signs of her. I was so desperate, I was ready to put an APB on her. Panic raced through me. There was a small voice in my brain that told me she was okay, she’d probably just gone for a walk, and she had Romeo with her for protection. But the madly-in-love, totally overreacting part was overriding any shred of sanity I had left.
As I turned on her street for my third drive-by, I was still trying to process what had happened. She wanted to know if I loved her. It was a simple question and the answer was yes. Hell, yes. I loved her. But, what good would come from me admitting that?
My intentions had been good. I didn’t want to lie to her. I couldn’t lie to her. There was no way I could look her in the eye and deny what I felt for her. So I’d told the truth, in the most cruel and insensitive way I possibly could have.
I knew what I was talking about when I’d said she wasn’t a forever girl. She wasn’t the girl that wanted to get married, have two-point-five kids and settle down. But, the moment I saw my statement register on her face, I realized that wasn’t how she took it. She thought she wasn’t the kind of girl I would want forever. The real bitch of it was that, she was the only girl I wanted. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.
Harmony was right. I am really bad at talking.
From the start, I’d handled things with Harmony ass backwards. Instead of being upfront and honest, I’d tried to keep my feelings bottled up, buried. I’d tried to distance myself from her. When that hadn’t worked, I’d gone all Jekyll and Hyde on her. One second I was telling her the reason I hadn’t had sex with anyone in a year and a half was because they weren’t her and the next I was ignoring her texts.
This ended tonight. I knew that she probably never wanted to speak to me again, and that was fair. But, somehow, I had to find a way to get her to hear me out. She had to know the truth, the whole truth.
As I pulled up in front of her house and got out of the truck, I noticed a man sitting on porch steps.
Adrenaline raced through me as I strode purposefully up the walkway.
“Can I help you with something?” My tone was in full job-mode.
He barely looked up from his phone. “No.”
I took a step closer. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s none of your business,” he said dismissively.
“Yes. It is. If you’re not going to tell me what you’re doing here, you need to leave.”
“Or what?” He puffed his chest out.
This guy could not be for real.
I took out my badge. “Or I can take you down to the station to have a little talk about trespassing.”
That changed his tune real quick. “I’m not trespassing. I’m waiting for my dog.”
No way.
“You’re T
im. The doctor?”
Harmony had dated this guy? He was such a prick. Of course, I probably wasn’t really in any place to pass judgment on who was or wasn’t a prick.
“Yes. I’m the doctor.” He said the word as if he was some kind of superstar.
Fuck. Losing Romeo would devastate Harmony. She loved that dog. I loved that dog. But, if it was Tim’s dog, there really wasn’t anything I could do. Unless…
Crossing my arms, I glared down at him. “Do you plan on leaving the country again?”
“It’s none of your business.”
This guy was such a tool.
“Actually it is, since you trust his care to incompetent dog-watchers. Do you know that there were six complaints from neighbors filed against Romeo due to his excessive barking? When officers followed up, several neighbors reported that he was left alone for days at a time; in the backyard with no shade, food, or water.”
“My buddy works a lot. He’s a doctor, too. And he had to go to Vegas and New Orleans for bachelor parties. Romeo was fine.”
“He was not fine. The morning that Miss Briggs took possession of him, he’d escaped and was picked up by animal control.”
“That was because he’s a little pussy when it comes to thunder. Harmony always babied him.”
That settled it. There was no way in hell I was going to let this asshole take Romeo back.
“Do you have papers to prove ownership of the canine?”
“Papers? No…I don’t. A patient gave him to me. I don’t have papers.”
“Well, possession is nine tenths of the law. Miss Briggs is in possession of the animal, therefore the burden is on you to prove ownership.”
“What?” Tim’s face scrunched up. “Fuck that. I want my dog back. It’s my dog.”
“Tim?” I heard Harmony’s voice behind me and I turned to see her standing with Romeo at her side.
As relieved as I was to see her, to see that she was okay, her timing couldn’t have been worse. I wanted to get rid of this douchebag before she had to deal with him.
Discovering Harmony (Wishing Well, Texas #3) Page 18