by Sam McCarthy
“I didn’t realise I had.” I told him. “I was just so aroused by what I was watching and when he invited me to join him; I didn’t think you would care.”
“Oh Elise, sweetheart.” He put down the sponge. “You have no idea how much it hurts to see you in pain caused by others. Nobody else should be marking you like this.” He lifted me gently onto his lap and held me in his arms. I cried, the salty tears dripping onto his shirt and he comforted me like you would a small child. He continued to hold me after the tears stopped falling and as I drifted off to sleep in his arms I heard him whisper.
“I need you to be mine and only mine Elise. You are my weakness.”
Chapter 24
When I woke the next morning he was laying by my side watching me. I opened my eyes slowly and frowned at him.
“Why are you staring at me?” I asked and grimaced as I moved to pull myself into a sitting position.
“Let me help you.” He placed his arms around me and lifted me gingerly, propping pillows behind me in an effort to ensure I was comfortable. “Okay?” He had a look of concern still and I wanted to reassure him.
“I’m okay.” I told him. “Better for seeing your face this morning.” I gave a wry smile.
He slipped off of the bed.
“I brought you some clothes. Can you manage?” He asked me as he moved towards the door.
“I think so.” I replied.
“Good. I will bring you some coffee and then I’m taking you home.” He smiled and exited the room.
I carefully got out of bed and pulled on the cotton maxi dress he had brought me. He was ever so considerate. Anything with a waist band would have been agony. These were not the actions of someone who didn’t care and I had to keep reminding myself of that. Even after hearing his words as I drifted off the previous night I was still unsure of where our relationship was headed. I sat on the edge of the bed pondering and was still there when he came in and handed me a steaming black coffee. I took it and sipped at it, and although it was hot, it was just what I needed for my champagne hangover.
“We need to talk don’t we?” He asked, not moving from his position in front of me just out of arms reach. This was disappointing. I needed him to be as near to me this morning as he was last night. I needed that comfort from him still. Although I was dreading the talk he needed to have with me I simply nodded in reply and sipped more of my coffee. I couldn’t help but wonder whether this was it for him. Still, it wasn’t a conversation we were having right now. That was clear.
A little while later he led me out of the building in the broad daylight and opened the car door for me. It was only as I buckled myself in with the seat belt that I realised he hadn’t blindfolded me, and I was looking out over a large barren piece of land in the middle of an industrial site. There were no signs on the building at all, and it looked pretty much just like an abandoned warehouse from the outside. I smiled to myself as he climbed into the driver’s seat. Surely he wouldn’t let me see the clubs location if it were over between us.
When we arrived back at the apartment, Dominic made himself scarce. He said he had some calls to take care of, that we would talk soon. I kept myself busy by cleaning the already pristine worktops in the surgical like kitchen and dusting the imaginary dust from the grand piano. I had come to realise that I didn’t really like having a housekeeper. At times like this I had nothing to do and I needed to keep myself busy to stop my mind from wandering. I was just thinking that I would go and clean my own flat, I had no doubt that Ellie had left a mess behind her, when he strode into the room and stood arms folded, legs slightly apart in the doorway.
“Going somewhere?” He asked. He wasn’t really asking. His words were merely a cover up. What he was really doing was telling me I wasn’t going anywhere.
“Not now that you are here, no.” I told him. “I was bored. So while you were busy, I was just going to nip out and clean my flat.” I looked down at my feet and fiddled with my own hands, wringing them backwards and forth. He had the ability to make me feel like a child and right now I wasn’t sure I could handle it.
“You mean Ellie’s flat?” He glared at me, daring me to respond.
“Yes Dominic. I mean Ellie’s flat.” I spoke quietly. I really didn’t want to argue with him. I only wanted things to be right between us. If they couldn’t be then I wanted it to be over as quickly as possible.
He moved towards me, like a leopard stalking his prey. Never before had I seen a man move with such grace, such poise. My breath caught in my throat as I watched him approach. He gestured to the sofa...
“Sit.”
I sat down and he joined me, though he kept a little distance between us. Minutes passed before he spoke again, and the silence was uncomfortable to say the least.
“I want us to be exclusive.” He said without even a glance in my direction. “I don’t want anyone else touching you.”
I could feel the rage bubbling inside of me. How dare he? How could he sit there and tell me he wanted us to be exclusive when he had been screwing the club whore the previous night without a second thought for me.
“I know what you are thinking...” he continued.
“Oh do you?” I interrupted him. “So tell me DOM... what exactly am I thinking?” I stared at him and when he didn’t speak I carried on... “Maybe I’m thinking that I would love to be exclusively yours, but I don’t think that you will keep your dick in your pants for more than two minutes.” There was still no response from him, his head hung slightly and his shoulders rising and falling with each breath he took. “Or maybe.... Maybe I’m thinking that you are only saying this because the thought of another man touching what belongs to you makes you feel out of control.” I was shouting now, the fury finally taking over and my hands shaking with fear. I didn’t really want this to end but I was gone too far now to not say what was really on my mind.
He was up on his feet before I spoke again.
“Yes!” He cried out. “Yes you are right! The thought of another man touching you, marking you, giving you pain or pleasure cuts me to the core.” He ran his hand through his hair, the frown lines on his forehead visible and his eyes dark and brooding. “I have to be in control Elise. Can you understand that?”
Finally! I thought. Halle-fucking-lulah. At last he speaks some truth. I stayed sitting and watched him fighting his own torment. Why was he like this?
“What happened to you Dominic?” I asked in a quiet voice. “Why are you so intent on destroying everything?” He glared at me as I spoke. “Did someone hurt you?” I needed some answers. I had to try and understand why he was the man he was. What made him tick.
“Not everyone is damaged Elise. Some of us just like to keep control, to own pretty things. Some of us just have an appreciation of pain running through our veins.” He held eye contact with me as he spoke.
“But you aren’t hurting yourself.” I tried to explain to him. “You are hurting others.”
“And I appreciate them letting me do so.” He continued to stare me down, as if goading me to disagree with him. “Don’t you like it when I turn your skin pink? Don’t you like it when I sink my teeth into the delicate softness of your neck?” He moved closer to me and leaned in to where I was sitting, He lifted his hand and grazed his thumb across my breast pausing as he touched the nub of my nipple, which was hardening as he spoke. “Don’t you like it when I squeeze you so hard that you whimper before coming harder than you have ever come before?” Right on cue he gripped my nipple between his thumb and forefinger and rolled it tightly between the two. I gasped and nodded.
He was right, I did enjoy it. I was happy for him to cause pain because I knew he would follow it up with more pleasure than I had ever been given in any other relationship. But there was the issue. This wasn’t a relationship. He owned me. He had everything, and I had...well I had nothing.
“But you hurt me much deeper than that.” I whispered. “I invited you to break me, but I didn’t think you would b
reak my heart.” I dropped my eyes to the floor and he stepped back as if he had been burned, his hand leaving my breast and his face contorted with confusion.
I stood up and moved to him.
“I’m sorry Dominic. I can’t go on like this.” I felt my voice catch in my throat. I hadn’t intended for things to go this way and my heart was screaming at me to shut up and just agree to what he was offering, where as my head was telling me not to be such a fool.
“Elise.” He spoke my name softly. “What is it that you want?”
I sighed.
“I want to know you. The real you. I want to be able to discuss your work with you like normal couples. I don’t even know what you do for a living? Do you have any idea how ridiculous that is?”
I took a moment to compose myself. I was angrier with him that I could have imagined. He shifted from foot to foot indicating that he was growing more and more uncomfortable with this conversation.
“I buy companies which are struggling, break them down, strip them of their assets and then move on to the next one.” He offered in explanation.
“Just like you do your women?” I scoffed at him.
“That’s unfair Elise. You asked me and I told you. What more can I do?”
He looked tired now, his face drawn and fine lines appearing that I hadn’t noticed previously.
“I’m sorry Dominic. You are right. I wasn’t being fair. But I want to understand what’s going on inside your head.”
“You don’t want to know what goes on inside my head Elise. I have enough trouble of my own battling the demons in there.” He turned his back on me and moved to stand by the window. “I don’t understand why you have to map everything out. You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see where life takes you.” He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets.
“In trust is the word ‘us’ Dominic.” I moved toward him until I could reach out and place my hand on his back. “It has to be a two way street. How can I put my trust in you if you aren’t willing to offer me the same courtesy?”
I stepped back and moved away. This was going nowhere.
He reached out and gripped my wrist lightly.
“I told you I wanted us to be exclusive. I meant BOTH of us. There was no real pleasure in what I did last night.” He admitted. “I’d had a tough day and I need some release. I thought I could get it elsewhere.” He looked down at the floor and stroked his thumb over the inside of my wrist before letting go of my hand. “I am sorry Elise. I didn’t set out to hurt you, and believe me when I tell you that it won’t happen again.”
I watched him carefully; there was more feeling, more emotion in his voice than ever before. He was clearly hurting as much as I was. I had no idea what we had with each other but I did know that it was stupid to throw it away. Everyone is allowed one mistake right? God knows Adam made enough of them in the early days and I always forgave him.
I moved towards him and knelt on the floor next to his feet. I looked up at him and as I opened my mouth to speak, I realised that there would be no going back from this. This was my commitment to him.
“You have given me a new lease of life. You have taught me how to love myself. You have taught me to open my mind...and my body to new experiences. I’m not ashamed to say that I love you.” I paused... He dropped to his knees too and took my face in his hands tenderly as I continued. “I meant it when I said that I was yours. I only ask that you talk to me.”
I waited for him to respond, and he just held my face, staring deep into my eyes before finally, he spoke...
“I will do anything to keep you in my life. You mean everything to me.”
I smiled. A smile that showed on the outside but spread much much deeper within. The elation of him finally admitting that he cared was more than I could have expected and at that moment in time, I couldn’t ever imagine a day in my life when he wasn’t there.
Chapter 25
*****
As time passed, Dominic and I slipped into a more ‘normal’ relationship. There were no more secrets. He didn’t tell me everything I was certain, but I usually knew what he was working on, and he came home and talked to me if he had a rough day. We attended the club together, in a purely professional capacity. I was helping out with the accounts and the day to day issues. We only ever used the private rooms when wanting to play. His ‘not wanting to share’ issue had now gone beyond nobody touching...it extended to only him even seeing me. I didn’t mind, in fact I quite liked it. I would still wake regularly with new welts and bruises, but he always took care of me afterwards, and made me feel like the Princess Max had always told me I was. I felt younger around him and he brought out the best in me. We had no safe word, he could read me perfectly. He knew exactly when I needed him to stop, and he always did.
It was comfortable. We seemed to have found each other and neither of us was willing to do anything to fuck it up.
When Ellie had finished her exams we had taken a week to fly off together for a holiday in the Caribbean. Dominic stayed home to catch up on some work though he did call every day. When I arrived home we had spent almost 48 hours in the bedroom ‘getting to know each other’ all over again.
Ellie had gone back to university in the September and was busy studying again. I had heard nothing from Daniel; though Ellie told me he was working with Adam now, trying desperately to bring the business back to where it was previously before Adam let it go to the pits.
Max had ended his relationship with his married man. He said he was too proud to be a ‘part time play thing’ and I understood completely. He was far too special to feel anything less than adored. He was dating a nice man now who worshipped the ground he walked upon. He was spending more and more time away from the restaurant, and there were plans for the two of them to spend Christmas with us.
Christmas!
Our first together.
To say I was excited would be an understatement.
*****
I woke to the feeling of Dominic slipping into bed beside me. He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me back to be perfectly spooned by him. He was dressed already and I groaned in disappointment.
“Good morning beautiful.” He murmured softly in my ear, planting a delicate kiss just under my lobe.
“Hmmmm” I shifted against him, feeling him harden as I did so.
“Ah ah ah.” He said shifting himself backwards. “I have to go to the office.”
I groaned again.
“Why didn’t you wake me earlier then?” I asked, my mouth forming a sulky pout.
“You looked so peaceful; I thought I would leave you sleeping.” He kissed me again and slipped back out of the bed, taking a moment to straighten his tie and smooth the creases out of his trousers. His erection was clearly visible and I laughed as he re adjusted himself.
He tutted and laughed with me.
“You are incorrigible.” He told me as he moved out of the room. “Enjoy your shopping.” He called back over his shoulder.”
I snuggled down in the duvet again and smiled.
I will just have ten more minutes I thought to myself. I had to drag myself out of bed soon as I had been ordered to shop for a dress for dinner. Dominic was taking out two business owners. It was a company he had been keeping an eye on for quite some time, and the owners were failing miserably to rescue it. Dominic wanted to rebuild it as an investment for our future. He was certain he could win them over tonight and he wanted me there on his arm to soften the blow I think. Not that they wouldn’t benefit from it, he was prepared to offer a lot of money for this particular company which had in its early days been hugely successful.
I kicked back the covers and slid out of the soft comfy bed. I grabbed a quick shower and threw some jeans and a vest top on. I quickly poured myself a coffee from the jug Dominic had left on the side and grabbed my jacket and scarf. Slipping my feet into my boots I grabbed the keys and took the lift down to the basement car pa
rk.
I parked in town and headed into the department store. There was a personal shopper here and it made it much easier. I simply sat on a comfy sofa while the young girl brought me stacks of dresses to choose from. When we narrowed it down to half a dozen or so she went off to find shoes and accessories to match while I moved into the changing room.
I opted for a simple satin dress in a deep purple, with slim straps which knotted at my lower back leaving my skin exposed. It cut under my bust and flowed from there to the floor, the fabric cascading like a waterfall. I would need to lift it while I walked or I would trip over it. It was simple yet elegant. A pair of silver strappy heels and a small clutch finished it off perfectly.
Satisfied with my choice, and equally satisfied that Dominic would love it too, I set off for the hairdressers.
A quick trim and a splash of colour later I was home again and preparing for our evening out. I knew Dominic would be back in a little while and I wanted to be ready when he got here. The table was booked for 7pm and I wanted to get dinner over with so we could head to the club and play.
I heard the door open just as I slipped into my shoes. I smiled as he moved behind me.
“You look amazing.” He told me as he gripped my hips in his hands and kissed my back. “As always.”
“Why thank you Sir.” I replied as I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck. His arousal was evident immediately as he pressed against me. “Pleased to see me?” I laughed.
“Constantly.” He gave me a quick squeeze before letting me go and turning to the rail where I had hung his suit. It was a pale silvery grey and went well next to my dress. His tie was the same deep purple as the satin that dressed my skin.
Within minutes he was ready to go and looking just perfect. It never ceased to amaze me just how much he turned me on. He needed to do nothing to ignite the fire inside of me. It was there smouldering constantly.
“Ready?” He asked.
I nodded and took his hand allowing him to lead me to the door. He picked up his keys on the way out.