Uschi Returns

  ‘Which branch?’

  ‘Cannon Street. City of London.’

  ‘And you were fitted in store?’

  ‘Yes I was. The bra fit me perfectly well. Which is why I can only conclude that there was a flaw in its design or construction, and I want my money back.’

  Sarah was jolly convincing in the role of a disgruntled customer, thought Roger. She should have taken up acting.

  Jemima was running out of conversation. ‘Well, can I ask you to post the item to us please, along with your proof of purchase.’

  ‘I, uh, can’t do that.’

  ‘You don’t have the receipt?’

  ‘Oh I have the receipt, it’s just the bra… it’s in a bit of a mess. White stains all over it. They won’t wash out. It’s rather embarrassing.’

  Roger and Uschi pricked up their ears. This, if anything, was the cue for Jemima to pry as to the source of these stains. Sarah had been drilled on planting clues as to the tittyfuck-related cause of the damage, and she was doing her best to steer Jemima onto the subject, but daft Jemima wasn’t going for it.

  ‘We can’t issue a refund if you don’t send us the bra,’ she said.

  ‘Aha, so you will issue a refund if I do?’

  Jemima cringed, put Sarah on hold, and stood again to talk to Roger. ‘I’m making a bit of a mess of this,’ she said.

  ‘Mess!’ said Roger, attempting to nudge her in the direction of discussing Sarah’s intermammary sex life. ‘Mess!’

  ‘I know, I know,’ frowned Jemima, misunderstanding, ‘No need to go on about it.’

  ‘Just give her the money back,’ sighed Roger.

  Jemima nodded, crestfallen, and sat back down to take Sarah off hold. ‘Ms O’Reilly? Are you still there?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Just post us the receipt and we’ll pay the money back onto your card. Is there any other way I can support you today?’

  ‘No. Thanks.’

  Jemima pulled off her telephone headset and slumped back in her chair until her firm breasts almost pointed vertically upwards beneath her low-cut red polka dot dress.

  Roger wandered around to her and leaned on her desk. ‘A quick word in the conference room?’ he said in a discreet voice. Uschi hovered nearby.

  Jemima rolled her eyes like a recalcitrant teenager, stood, and trudged into the empty conference room. Roger and Uschi followed her and closed the door behind them.

  ‘Yes, I know I fucked that up,’ said Jemima. ‘I guess I’m in trouble now?’

  ‘Not at all,’ smiled Roger. ‘Let’s sit down.’

  They sat at the big table.

  ‘The good news,’ Roger said, ‘Is that the call you just had was set up. It was a roleplay with… someone working with Uschi.’

  Realisation and relief spread over Jemima’s face. ‘So I won’t have to refund the bra, then?’

  ‘Nope,’ said Roger. ‘It was just a test.’

  Jemima’s face fell again. ‘And I failed it. What was it I was supposed to have done?’

  ‘She gave you an important clue,’ said Uschi. ‘Remember when she mentioned the stains on the bra?’

  Jemima thought, then nodded.

  ‘The white stains. What do you suppose could have caused them?’

  ‘Toothpaste?’ said Jemima with an uncertain grimace. ‘When I’m brushing my teeth in my underwear the toothpaste often dribbles down my chin and into my cleavage, and sometimes it gets on my bra.’

  ‘But,’ Uschi said, ‘You toothpaste comes out in the wash. Sarah told you that these stains wouldn’t launder out. What kinds of stains do you suppose those could have been?’

  Jemima shrugged, her pretty face blank.

  Uschi shuffled her chair a little closer to Jemima. ‘You’re sexually experienced, aren’t you?’

  Jemima nodded brightly. ‘Oh yes,’ she smiled.

  ‘Have you ever got semen stains on your clothes?’

  The penny dropped. Jemima threw a hand to her mouth. ‘She got semen all over her bra? But how? And isn’t this just a situation you made up? How was I supposed to guess that?’

  This naïveté where boob-sex was concerned was starting to turn Roger on immensely. ‘It was made up in this case,’ said Roger, ‘But we based it on a real one. That complaint with the rupturing Lacy Lady that Louise dealt with… remember I went to investigate the warranty claim in person?’

  ‘Yes. We never got told what happened.’

  ‘Well, that’s because it wasn’t something that’s easily discussed in the workplace,’ said Roger. ‘You see, the customer had used the bra for the purpose of titfucking.’

  Jemima’s eyes widened, and she unconsciously fingered her bra strap through her dress.

  Uschi placed a friendly hand on Jemima’s knee. ‘As any girl who’s given a titfuck wearing a bra knows, those stains on the cups are a calculated risk.’

  ‘Yes. Of course.’ Jemima had gone even paler than she already was.

  ‘Jemima,’ said Uschi. ‘Have you ever given a titwank in your bra?’

  Jemima bit her lip and shook her head.

  ‘Have you ever given a titwank at all?’

  Blue eyes huge with worry, Jemima shook her head again and turned to Roger. ‘Is that a bad thing? Am I in trouble?’

  ‘Of course not,’ said Roger, erection straining in his trousers. ‘Of course not. But it’s a significant part of our customers’ sex lives. Their big bosoms are our business, and you girls need a thorough understanding of all facets of a busty woman’s life.’

  ‘B-but, no-one’s ever asked me to…’ said Jemima.

  ‘Men are usually too embarrassed to ask. Especially these days. We have to offer it. There’s nothing a man wants to do more to an ample, healthy young cleavage than to stick his dick in it. Am I right, Roger?’

  Roger gave a sheepish, non-committal shrug.

  ‘I’ll take that as a yes. But men assume we won’t want to do it. The more obsessed men are with big bosoms, the shyer they are about it. And the irony is that a lot of us enjoy a titwank almost as much as they do!’

  ‘I can learn!’ insisted Jemima. ‘If it’s not too late?’

  ‘You have a boyfriend?’

  ‘Sort of on-off. But I don’t think he’d appreciate being my test subject. He’s more into my bum and legs. What if I get it all wrong? Where should I start?’

  ‘Let me show you,’ said Uschi. ‘Roger, pants off.’

  Jemima looked rather shocked. ‘Oh, now, really, that isn’t necessary…’

  ‘I don’t mind if Roger doesn’t?’ Uschi peeled off her maroon sweater where she sat. Beneath it she was wearing a thin white vest that clung lightly to her bulging curves. Her thick black locks trailed through the neck of the sweater, and she shook them back down to rest on her shoulders, her large, upswept braless knockers wobbling heavily beneath sheer cotton. ‘Consider this part of the training,’ said Uschi. ‘But don’t tell the others. Or at least don’t tell Imogen.’

  Jemima giggled and shuffled her chair back to get a wider view of proceedings.

  Roger stood and opened his belt, then unzipped his trousers. As usual, the presence of busty women had got him erect already, and it was with customary difficulty that he extracted his rigid rod from his pants. Eventually, released, it twanged up, shuddering before his flapping tie.

  ‘Oh goodness,’ yelped Jemima in alarm.

  ‘The first step,’ said Uschi as though this were perfectly normal workplace behaviour, ‘Is to get your man hard. As you see, we can skip this step for now. But you might want to jiggle your breasts or talk about them at length to get him in the right frame of mind.’

  Uschi peeled off her camisole, and her liberated breasts swayed before her, high and jutting, as she arched her back.

  Roger nearly came at the glorious sight of them, bared for him at last after a long morning of braless tight-sweatered tease.

  ‘A titfuck,’ Uschi explained to the rapt Jemima, ‘Is just like an ordinary fuck, but you’r
e using your cleavage instead of your vagina. Go ahead, Roger, stick it in.’ She parted her legs to allow him to approach, her tight grey skirt riding up her thighs.

  Roger looked down at Uschi’s deep natural cleavage which quivered at a convenient height where she sat, took a couple of steps forward, and inserted his boner with slow, steady delight as far between the juicy German’s perfectly formed E-cups as it would go. The act sent electric feelings of pleasure racing to every nerve ending in his middle-aged body.

  ‘Now fuck them, Roger. Fuck my tits.’

  While Jemima looked on in unblinking fascination, Roger started shunting his erect penis back and forth while Uschi’s plump, tan breasts hung either side of it. Both his and Uschi’s hands were down by their sides.

  ‘When you have breasts as chunky and close-set as these,’ Uschi explained, ‘You can do the titfuck like this, completely without the use of hands. See how my breasts stroke and caress Roger’s shaft with each stroke he makes in and out of my soft cleavage. Does that feel good, Roger?’

  ‘Yes,’ gasped Roger. ‘It feels… oh Christ it feels f-fantastic…’

  Jemima smirked in naughty astonishment.

  ‘But the secret of a perfect titfuck is constant variation of speed and pressure. Let’s say I give my boobs a wiggle while Roger is doing that.’

  Roger braced himself for erotic overload as Uschi shook her shoulders causing her succulent boobs to tumble about his dick, squeezing and battering it from side to side as he continued to slowly buck his hips in and out. ‘T-too much…!’ he stammered as he felt an orgasm approach with worrying suddenness.

  ‘Then grab them and stop them,’ said Uschi with a wry smile.

  Weighing up the relative stimulating merits of being jigglefucked to painful premature ejaculation and being potentially pushed over the edge by the feeling if those squishy, heavy boobs in his hands, Roger went for the latter. He lifted his hands from his sides and placed them firmly on Uschi’s wobbling udders, stopping them dead and holding them loosely in place around his ever-fucking boner. He bounced them up and down a little, feeling their weight and unique jellying consistency, before thinking better of it. Again: too much too soon. He simply held Uschi’s tits as still as was possible, avoiding creating too tight a cleavage, maintaining the delicate equilibrium of his delicious, tingling, pre-orgasmic state of arousal.

  ‘I’d be sucking his cock by now,’ said Jemima, her shock giving way to keen excitement. ‘Not yours, Roger. Sorry. You know what I mean.’ She gave a nervous giggle.

  ‘It’s tempting, I know,’ said Uschi. ‘Especially when it’s as long a cock as this and it gets so close to your lips.’

  Roger playfully nudged Uschi’s chin with his engorged, twitching cock helmet on an upstroke.

  ‘Cheeky!’ exclaimed Uschi. ‘That’s the end of the titwank for you, naughty man.’

  With a wicked grin, Uschi seized Roger’s wrists and pulled his hands away, letting her big breasts sway with heavy aimlessness around his thrusting dick, then she slid her chair back to release him from her cleavage entirely and stood up, rubbing her hands. ‘You get the idea,’ she said to Jemima.

  ‘I do,’ said Jemima, eyes darting back and forth between Roger’s flailing erection and Uschi’s proud tits.

  Orgasm denied so horribly, Roger wondered if he might cum hands-free anyway, but instead the climax teetered just out of reach. He stumbled back, held the table for balance, and sat down, boner towering unsteadily from his lap.

  ‘Don’t worry, Roger, I won’t leave you like that,’ laughed Uschi. ‘I’m not a sadist. Not much of one, at any rate. No, we need to show Jemima how a titfuck works with a bra on. I’d call the store room and ask for another, but I’m running out of excuses. Jemima, you’re an erotic E-cup, would you mind if I borrow yours?’

  Jemima fingered her bra strap again and pouted. ‘Won’t you both get cum all over it? I thought you said it was impossible to wash out?’

  ‘I’ll keep things from going that far,’ said Uschi. ‘And if Roger can’t contain himself, then I promise to buy you a new one.’

  ‘Okay,’ shrugged Jemima with a smile. ‘It will be useful for me to see what all the fuss is about.’ She looked down at her polka dot dress and hesitated.

  ‘What’s the matter, dear?’ said Uschi.

  Jemima cringed a little. ‘This dress is all one piece with no zip or buttons. I can’t really get the bra off without taking the whole dress off over my head.’

  ‘That’s okay,’ said Uschi. ‘We don’t mind.’

  ‘It’s just,’ Jemima gulped and lowered her posh voice to a whisper. ‘I’m not wearing any knickers.’

  Uschi just smiled patiently.

  ‘Okay.’ Jemima grabbed the hem of the form-fitting dress from around her thighs, and peeled the whole thing upwards.

  Uschi winked at Roger. Roger just stared in amazement. How did Uschi get away with these ploys, let alone think them up in the first place?

  Jemima’s on-off boyfriend was right to like her legs. As befitted a once potential model, they were long and elegantly curved. A presumably once clean-shaven intimacy had now grown a soft, discreet patch of dark blonde curls. Her hips had softened and rounded since the catwalk diet had been abandoned in favour of burgers and ice cream. She dropped the dress over the back of a chair. ‘Sorry about this,’ she said. ‘I’ll just get this bra off. Would you help me with the hooks? I’m not used to wearing them.’

  ‘Certainly,’ said Uschi, and stood to walk over to Jemima.

  Jemima turned her back, letting Roger and Uschi lay eyes on the luscious and delectably shaped bare bottom that perched atop those tasty thighs.

  Uschi shot Roger a wide-eyed expression and mouthed the word “Wow” at him, then busied herself with the young woman’s bra fastener. The undergarment came off, and Jemima turned to face her manager and the topless female consultant, now fully nude save for sandals and a necklace.

  Roger tore his eyes from Uschi’s bosom to Jemima’s. He barely knew where to look. It wasn’t the first time he had seen Jemima topless of course, but to see them in the context of the full anatomical package was nothing short of awe-inspiring. Jemima’s breasts were almost too perfect. Round and impossibly firm for their size, which wasn’t much smaller than Uschi’s.

  ‘I can’t believe I’m standing here stark naked in front of you, Roger,’ laughed Jemima. ‘And you with that… that… that cock of yours out too! So awkward!’

  ‘It’s just part of the training,’ said Roger, doing his best not to shoot his load on the spot. ‘Nothing to worry about.’

  ‘I was about to scold you for staring at my tits,’ said Jemima. ‘But under the circumstances, I don’t think I can blame you!’

  They all laughed weakly. A bead of perspiration ran down Roger’s temple.

  ‘Now, Roger,’ said Uschi, sitting down again. ‘Come here and put your penis back between my breasts, then I’ll put Jemima’s bra on to hold it in place.’

  Roger rose with difficulty from the chair, a tense smile in the Jemima’s direction, and took up his position again between Uschi’s parted knees, boner aimed roughly between her dense, jutting breasts, anxious to return to the pleasurable depths of that perfect soft cleavage. As he plunged his stiffness within, relief washed over him, as though every second not spent fucking Uschi’s bosom was a second spent in painful withdrawal. He resisted the strong urge to jerk his way to an already very overdue climax so that Uschi could continue her demonstration.

  ‘Excellent, Roger. Now, Jemima, watch closely.’

  Jemima scampered across to stand next to the lewdly interlocked twosome, her own bust almost obscuring Roger’s view of Uschi’s face entirely as she leaned in between them to watch and learn.

  Uschi passed the bra cups over the protruding extremities of her softly rounded globes and slipped her hands through the straps, then reached behind her back and pulled the garment tight. The effect was to squeeze her breasts together with a sudden tightness
that was, thankfully for Roger, tempered by their yielding squidginess. Roger wondered what the same experience might be like with Jemima. Her solid tits would purge his cock of cum in a flash. It would be like standing on a tube of toothpaste.

  The bra clasps snapped together and Uschi let go. If anything, the slight release of pressure this incurred made Roger want to cum more, not less. The ejaculatory sweet spot seemed to be somewhere between full boob pressure and no pressure at all, and Uschi, in the contracting and opening of her cleavage, was veering ever closer to nailing it.

  Now trapped, Roger’s cock had nowhere to go but up and down, in and out of Uschi’s harnessed bosom, lubricated by its own steady flow of pre-cum. ‘Oh Jesus,’ Roger managed to say. ‘Oh… oh…’ there were no words.

  ‘See?’ said Uschi. ‘Now both our hands are free. And the fact that this bra is slightly too small for me is actually an advantage. I’ve fastened it on the last set of hooks, which means my tits have some room to push the cups away from my body, giving Roger’s big, fat dick the room it needs to slip up underneath.’

  ‘I see,’ nodded Jemima earnestly.

  ‘So, for example, I could cup Roger’s balls, like this.’ Uschi slid her hands up Roger’s inner thighs.

  ‘No, Uschi,’ Roger began, but it was too late. Uschi, as though cupping a bowl of hot soup, cradled her palms around either of Roger’s simmering testicles. Her hands were surprisingly and excitingly cool, and the sensation tipped the balance.

  Roger came.

  The first beneficiary of Roger’s tribute to Uschi’s magnificent breasts was not Uschi herself but Jemima, whose inquisitive face was hovering above at the time and found itself pelted with three forceful cockfuls of backlogged semen in the space of as many seconds.

  ‘Oh!’ was all Jemima could bring herself to utter, then she choked a little on the jizz up her nose.

  Roger, meanwhile, was babbling wordlessly in unbridled relief as he fucked and came, fucked and came, bucking his hips and sliding his throbbing manhood up and down Uschi’s bra-tight cleavage with reckless abandon. Just when he thought the orgasm might be starting to subside, Uschi announced that she could feel the upheaval threaten to dislodge her nipples from the bra’s cups. Eager to assist in this process, Roger began wriggling his hips from side to side as he fucked, causing the exposed portions of Uschi’s bust to quiver and careen until, as expected, a wave of ample German tit surged forward, now jiggling in haphazard, horny glee. Where Roger’s cock had initially been steering Uschi’s bust, Uschi’s bust now steered it, as shoving it this way and that and forcing ropes of cum not just upwards but in all directions. ‘Yes!’ Uschi boomed in sexual triumph. ‘Yes, Roger, cum between my big erotic titties!’