Practicing Parenthood

by Cara Lockwood

  “I want to be on top,” she murmured, and he let her move. He lay down and she climbed on him, and in his mind’s eye, he saw a flash of another memory. This was what she did the last time. Now, she sat on top of him, hands on his chest, full breasts spilling out between them. He arched his neck and flicked a nipple with his tongue. Her nipples were darker than he remembered. The pregnancy, maybe? He loved the color, like milk chocolate.

  Then she moved atop him, raising her arms above her head, crossing them, and he reached up and cupped her full breasts, marveling at the weight of them in his hands. She was a beautiful woman. A work of art. She rocked her body faster, her hips grinding into his and then, suddenly, she reached her own climax, her nipples pointed and puckered, her head thrown back as the pure pleasure took her to another place. She fell off him, satiated, but he was far from done. He flipped her on her side and took her from behind, in strong deliberate strokes. Oh, he wanted this. He’d wanted this since their first night together, since far before that, since the moment he’d first laid eyes on her.

  You’re going to be my wife, he thought, determined to make it true. They did belong together, and he’d prove it to her. He wanted her in the most basic of ways. In every way. He could hold back the tide of his climax no longer. He came with a guttural grunt of pleasure, spilling himself deep inside her.

  He collapsed against her back, wrapping her in his embrace, feeling sated at last. Finally, he remembered the sex they’d had. Completely remembered it. Who would’ve known the disapproving defense attorney could be this...free? He would never forget the way she’d ridden him, the confident way she took herself to her own climax. What a truly incredible woman, he thought. Even hotter than he remembered. He’d lucked out in so many ways. This intelligent, compassionate, fantastic woman was carrying his child.

  For a full minute, he didn’t want to move. She didn’t, either, and he held her there, spooning against her back for what felt like half a lifetime. He didn’t want to let her go, didn’t want to break apart, for fear it would somehow break the spell between them. For once, they weren’t fighting. Correction—for once she wasn’t fighting him. Why she was so sure they’d make a terrible couple was beyond him. The sex was incredible, and wasn’t that a good start?

  “You’re just perfect, Maddie,” he murmured in her ear. “I mean that. You are. Truly. Exceptional.” He’d been with enough women to know exactly what he wanted, what he needed, and that was Maddie.

  “Are you going to give me a star rating?” she teased as she traced the outline of his chest with one fingernail.

  “Five out of five stars,” he declared. “Without a doubt.”

  She chuckled, and he felt her laugh against his chest. He loved making her laugh. He suddenly realized what he wanted more than anything was the chance to make her laugh for the rest of their lives. The possibility was comforting. He didn’t have to worry about finding a wife, about figuring out if she was Miss Right, because the baby had done that for him. Now, he’d just have to make her Mrs. Right.

  She grew silent, and he could almost hear the wheels of her mind turning. What was she thinking now? He hoped that her orgasm had knocked all the doubts out of her mind. Yet, if anyone could find fault with their amazing sex, it would be Madison Reddy.

  Her brain never shut off. It made her an imposing defense attorney, but—at times—an infuriating woman.

  “What are you thinking?” she asked him, then.

  “Wondering what you were thinking,” he admitted honestly.

  “I asked you first.” Somehow, this felt like a trap.

  “Well,” he began cautiously. He stroked her hair, loving its thickness. “I was wondering how you were going to somehow try to convince me that great sex means we’re destined for divorce.”

  She laughed again, a little giggle that shook her back.

  “I haven’t agreed to marry you yet,” she said.

  “Oh, you will.” He inhaled the sweet scent of her hair, admiring its softness as he laid his cheek against the back of her head. “You’ll be Mrs. Baptista.”

  This caused her to peel herself away from him. “Okay, say I do marry you—which is a looong shot. Since when am I going to give up my name?”

  “Because...” Well, because Collin had just assumed she would. He’d never thought of her not changing her name. Should he push it? Or not? Was this one of those arguments where she’d insist that this was more proof that they weren’t compatible?

  Madison stared at him, eyebrows arched, looking as sexy as any model. Suddenly, he didn’t care whether she took his name or not, as long as he could take her body every night.

  He pulled her down and kissed her, and she returned his kisses as she rolled onto her back, weaving her hands through his hair. Saved! Thank goodness. He broke the kiss, and she glanced at him, breathless. Her eyes seemed dazed, and very, very beautiful, framed by the thickest, fullest black lashes he’d ever seen. He could gaze at them all day.

  “Maybe when we argue, I should just kiss you,” he suggested.

  Madison gave a frantic nod. “Yes, yes, let’s do that.”

  He bent down and kissed her once more.

  Then, his phone, lying on the bedside table, rang, the screen lighting up with an incoming call. Reluctantly, he ended the kiss to see who might be trying to reach him. That was when he saw it was his old friend, Jenny, from the prosecutor’s office, his former boss.

  “Hello,” he said, thinking, finally. He’d left her a dozen voice-mail messages about Jimmy Reese. “Did you catch him? Tell me you caught him.”

  Beside him, Madison tensed. Pulling the top sheet over her bare chest and sitting up, she eyed him, concern on her face.

  “No, we haven’t. Yet.”

  The muscles in Collin’s shoulders stiffened. “What’s the latest?” He glanced at Madison, who was still studying him. Who is it? she mouthed. But he shook his head, holding up a finger.

  “Well, we tracked down his brother, and with a little persuasion his brother admitted Reese was hell-bent on finding you. Finding you and Madison Reddy. Said he knew he didn’t have much time before he was caught, but if he’s going away for twenty years, might as well kill the people responsible for putting him behind bars first.”

  Collin felt like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water on him. This wasn’t the first time he’d ever been threatened by a con, and while he already knew Jimmy Reese was determined to get revenge, the fact that he was broadcasting it to his next of kin made it all the more real. He reached out and sought Madison’s hand.

  “Well, you sure know how to ruin a man’s vacation,” Collin joked, but inside he seethed.

  “All available officers are on the manhunt, but maybe we could round up a few to give you some protection?” Collin knew she didn’t make the offer lightly. She wouldn’t assign anyone unless she thought Jimmy Reese posed a real threat, but right now, Collin felt the best thing to do would be to use all on staff to apprehend Reese, before he found out where they were.

  “No. What are the odds he’d find Rashad’s house? Use them to track down Reese. Maybe station one officer at the ferry stop, since that’s the only way onto this island.”

  “He could get around the ferry stop. If he had his own boat. I’d feel better if I sent a couple out. Just to be sure.”

  “I can handle myself.” Collin had taken self-defense, and he carried a conceal-and-carry permit for a handgun, which he had stowed in his bag at the rental house. Hell, he was a better shot than some of the cops were, at least those he saw at the range on weekends.

  “I want you to catch him before he figures out where we are. You’ll need all the manpower there. Not babysitting us. We’ll be fine.” Collin felt certain that sending cops here would be a waste of time, and he needed them all working to track down Reese.

  “Okay. Watch your back, Baptista.” With that, Jenny hung
up.

  Collin stared at his phone, then turned to Madison. “I’ve got some bad news. Jimmy Reese...” He paused, wondering what would be the point of telling her what she already knew. “They haven’t caught him yet,” he finished. “They found his brother, but then the trail went cold.”

  “What else?” Madison blinked fast.

  “He’s been talking about you. And me. To his brother.”

  Madison nodded, as if resigned. “I figured.”

  Collin regretted saying anything. Tears glistened in her eyes. He sat down and pulled Madison into his arms.

  “He’s not going to hurt you. I won’t let him.”

  Madison allowed him to hold her, and he squeezed her tighter.

  “I want you to know that. We’re not enemies anymore, okay?”

  She nodded into his chest and swiped at her eyes. He pulled away and wiped a tear from her cheek. “You okay?” he asked.

  “Damn pregnancy hormones. I usually don’t cry this easily.” She angrily rubbed her eyes.

  “Good, because I hate crybabies,” he teased, and then she laughed as he stroked another tear from her cheek.

  * * *

  DURING THE REST of the week, worry about Reese began to fade into the background, since neither of them could do anything from the island to help catch the escaped convict. They notified Yvana and her staff, as well as everybody on ferry duty, to be on the lookout for the man and gave them all pictures. If he set foot anywhere near the clubhouse, Yvana and her crew would recognize him. They both began to feel a little safer. Things returned to normal, or as normal as they could be with a pregnant woman suffering from near-constant morning sickness and a puppy with little to no training yet.

  Every day, Collin chipped further away at Madison’s reluctance to get married, even as they fell into a kind of routine. They’d wake up, walk the dog, feed him with pet food they’d borrowed from Dr. Ruben and then plan the day’s meals. Collin made himself useful around her uncle’s house—fixing a leaky pipe and mowing the lawn. Could they be domesticated together? Living in tandem once the baby came?

  As they sat on the back porch, watching the sun set on Friday, the sky in front of them was a blaze of colors from bright pink and lavender to a darkened orange. Collin drank beer from a bottle and Madison had yet another can of fizzy water. Teddy lay on the wooden boards, head between his paws as he napped. They’d had no luck finding his owner in spite of Madison’s efforts. But trying to do that was much better than worrying about what Jimmy Reese might or might not be doing. No one had called the front office in search of a missing dog; a call to Yvana turned up no renters who’d brought pets they’d registered. Of course, Yvana had pointed out that plenty of people snuck them onto the island, and if the family had planned to ditch the poor dog, they wouldn’t have announced that they’d brought him in the first place.

  Madison studied Teddy, such a cute yellow fluff ball, and wondered who could be so cold-hearted as to leave the dog to fend for himself.

  Collin reached out from his nearby deck chair and clasped her free hand. His touch comforted her despite all her reservations about him.

  She glanced at his profile, wondering what it would be like to see him every day, to live with him as they were doing here. They’d slept together the last few nights, their bodies fitting as if they belonged. The sex made her hit heights she’d never thought possible, and even she had to admit they had a spark unlike any she’d ever experienced before. Maybe opposites did attract. Maybe she liked his law-and-order stiff persona, his overconfidence that went straight into the bedroom. Maybe she could somehow soften him, help him see that the world wasn’t black and white. Maybe he could change, and she was wrong to doubt him. Maybe they could make a marriage work.

  But then again, they were in vacation mode, not day-to-day living, and she knew it couldn’t last. What would happen when the real world crept in? When she tried to go back to work after the baby was born? When they found themselves on opposite sides of a case once again?

  The ocean breeze rustled the treetops around them, their deck porch, adjacent to her bedroom, a full two stories above the ground. She loved sitting here in the evenings, watching the sun paint colors across the sky as it dipped below the horizon, hidden in the distance by palm trees.

  “You can’t have much vacation time left,” Madison said, bringing up the subject she’d been avoiding for the last few days. She hadn’t wanted to know when he planned to leave, she realized. She was growing accustomed to his presence, his help if she needed it, his touch every day.

  “I’ve got a few months off,” he said. “And as long as Jimmy’s out there, I’m not going anywhere.”

  Madison felt reassured by that as she stretched out her legs on the wooden chair and gazed up at the stars in the sky above them. “Months? How did you manage that?” she asked, surprised, as she took another sip of her carbonated lime-flavored water. “I didn’t think the state attorney’s office gave that kind of vacation. Especially to their stars.”

  Collin took a deep swig of beer. He studied the moon that had just begun to rise over the treetops. It loomed, big and yellow, above the dark outline of palm trees in the distance. The ocean was too far to see, just a dark blot on the horizon. “Actually, I’m leaving the state attorney’s office.”

  Madison sat up in her Adirondack chair and stared at him. “Private practice?” She couldn’t imagine the hard-charging attorney giving up the high ground. “You joining us defense attorneys on the dark side?”

  Collin chuckled, and glanced her way, the baseball cap he wore partially obscuring his face.

  “No. I’m going to work for the prosecutor’s office in Miami. I’m taking some time off before I start the new job. The man I’m replacing isn’t leaving for four months.”

  Madison sat there, stunned. Miami was two and a half hours away from Fort Myers, and that was when traffic was good.

  “When did this happen?”

  Collin looked up at the sky and then at her. He seemed a little...uncomfortable. “I took the job a month ago. Put in my notice right away, and had my last day at the state attorney’s office just before I drove out to see you.”

  “So...you proposed to me and you didn’t think you ought to mention that you planned to live in Miami?” Madison felt indignation tickle the back of her throat. This was textbook Collin. He assumed that whatever he planned was right, and everybody else should follow along.

  “Look, I know. It’s a shock.”

  “You weren’t going to tell me before you proposed?”

  Collin rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, I was sort of hoping to break the news after you said yes. You know, when you were supposed to be delirious with happiness.” He gave a weak laugh as she glared. “Okay, fine. Bad joke. But think about it. There are plenty of jobs in Miami. Good defense firms, better salaries.”

  “I don’t want to work at another firm. I like my uncle’s firm.” Truth be told, she yearned for a larger family, and her work provided that. The people were great, and the fact that her uncle ran the place just made it seem cozy. Safe. A feeling lost to her these days. Or since Jimmy Reese had become her client, anyway.

  “Come on, Maddie. You can’t work for your uncle forever.” Collin finished the last of his beer and set the empty bottle down on the deck, by the leg of his chair.

  “Why can’t I? He’s a great boss. And he’s like a father to me. I wouldn’t be the attorney I am today without him.”

  “I’m not saying Reddy isn’t great. He is well-respected and a very smart businessman, but at some point, don’t you want a challenge? Get a job on your own merits?”

  Madison ground her back molars together in frustration. Suddenly, the beautiful night sky above them didn’t seem so peaceful anymore. “I did get this job on my own merits.”

  “Yeah, but he’s your uncle...” Collin straightened in his
chair and pushed his baseball cap back. Now, she could see his eyes—mildly annoyed, a little patronizing.

  “And he wouldn’t have hired me if he didn’t think I was qualified. If anything, he pushed me harder than his other junior attorneys.” Madison didn’t like the fact that Collin thought her uncle had handed her the position. It wasn’t like that. Not at all. Affection aside, he wouldn’t have brought her on if he hadn’t thought her one hundred percent capable of doing the job.

  “Well, you could always extend your leave of absence. Be a stay-at-home mom for a while.”

  “No. I’m not giving up my career.” Madison felt certain of this. She wanted more to offer her child—a different kind of example, one that focused on believing in oneself, and making the most of one’s talents.

  “Huh.” Collin seemed stumped. “Well, we’ll need to figure it out. Because we’re going to live in Miami.”

  “Says who? You don’t get to dictate where we live.” A sea breeze tousled Madison’s hair and blew a strand in her eyes. She angrily swiped it away. “I’m not a dog you can just tell to go pee outside.”

  “Well, it’s not like that worked with Teddy, anyway,” Collin grumbled. “I would’ve loved to ask your input before I took the job. But it’s not like you gave me any warning that I might need to stay in Fort Myers.”

  Madison felt all kinds of emotions at once. First, she felt a twinge of guilt. That much was true; she hadn’t told him. If she had, when she’d found out about the pregnancy, maybe he would’ve made a different choice.

  But she was also shocked that he’d been planning to move away all this time, never to see her again. If she hadn’t become pregnant, Collin would’ve been out of her life for good. That realization stunned her—and hurt her.

  “You’re saying if I told you about the baby a month ago, you would’ve reconsidered taking this new job?”

  “Maybe. We could’ve at least talked about it. You never gave me the chance.” Collin stared at her a long time.