by Komal Kant
As I turned back to face Hadie, my eyes fell on a guy standing a few feet away from us by a set of lockers. He was tall, well-built, had dark blonde hair and looked familiar. He also looked like he wanted to hit me.
It was Hadie’s ex-boyfriend.
Ignoring him, I placed a hand on Hadie’s shoulder. “You okay?” I asked, leaning down to study her face.
She closed her eyes and nodded, her face tense, like she was trying to bottle up all her feelings. I admired her for being so strong, but keeping your feelings caged up like that wasn’t healthy.
“You don’t have to lie to me, Hadie,” I said, my voice low and controlled.
Her bottom lip trembled and she opened up her glistening, brown eyes. “They’re just jerks, that’s all. I can’t waste my time thinking about them. I can’t let them get to me.”
“It’s okay to be upset,” I said, reaching out to stroke the side of her face.
Our eyes met, and her face flushed as she gently pushed my hand away. “Lincoln, I really don’t want to talk about this right now. I’d rather ignore it and not make a big deal about it.”
Sighing, I let my eyes wander around the hallway and they fell on Hadie’s ex again. He looked angry as he watched us, and slung his bag over his shoulder before walking past us.
“Hey, that’s your ex, right?” I asked Hadie, nodding in the direction of his retreating back.
Hadie turned her head and followed my gaze. She looked back at me, her eyes cold and dark. “Yep, that’s Bennett, my chaste ex-boyfriend.”
Her tone was sour and I’d never heard her speak about anyone in that tone before. He had obviously hurt her pretty bad. I didn’t get why he would cheat on someone like Hadie. She was the most amazing girl I’d ever met.
What was the point of having such a great thing and then losing it because you couldn’t keep it in your pants? Clearly this jerk-off didn’t know a great thing when he had it. Life was way too short for all this stupid high school drama and pointless sleeping around.
If a girl like Hadie ever became my girlfriend, I would give her the world. I would make her the happiest girl alive. I wasn’t good enough for her, though. But neither was that loser who’d broken her down.
That Bennett guy had just shot to the top of my shit list.
Chapter Fourteen
Hadie
On Friday afternoon I had a shift at Belle’s Diner, which was just about the nicest place to work in town. Mainly because Belle, the owner, was a super nice and laid-back boss who never got mad or yelled.
Then again, she’d known me since I’d been born and had babysat me through most of her teenage years, so we had nothing but love for each other.
I greeted Laura Dempsey, who was serving at the front counter. She was a peppy junior who was a little boy-crazy, but still good to talk to because she was an endless fountain of gossip. It was strange that she was always complaining about not having a boyfriend because she was very pretty with her porcelain skin, wide-set eyes and pale red hair. Her look was unique, so it baffled me that she was still single.
When I walked into the kitchen to grab my apron, I found Eddison Cavallari wiping down the bench. Eddie was a boy in my grade from school and was actually one of Luca Byron’s friends.
At first, when he’d started working here, I’d been a little wary of him. Sure, he was only a few inches taller than me and had interesting hazel eyes streaked with greens and browns, but he also had dyed black hair, a lip piercing—not to mention the numerous piercings on his ears—and a grungy-gothic style of dressing. Initially, I’d found him a little intimidating but it didn’t take me very long to overlook his physical appearance.
He was a nice guy, and sometimes we had good conversations. Mostly, he kept to himself at work and concentrated hard on cooking fries and making burgers.
“Hey, Eddie,” I said as I tied the apron strings around my waist. It was white and had Belle’s Diner written on it cursive, and was one of those short aprons that stopped around the thighs. “I didn’t know you were working today.”
Eddie fumbled with the cloth he’d been using to clean up and dropped it on the floor. Retrieving it quickly, he straightened up, his face growing red. “Uh…um, yeah. Belle wasn’t feeling well so she called me in to cook tonight and I needed the money so…” He trailed off.
“Oh no, what’s wrong with her?” I asked, hoping it wasn’t too serious. I knew Belle hated being away from her diner for too long. The woman was a workaholic.
“She didn’t say,” Eddie said with a shrug, his face returning to a normal color. “She just asked me to stay until close and told me to call her if I needed anything.”
“Oh, okay. Well, it’s good to see you. We haven’t had many shifts together in a while.” I patted down my apron which was starting to look wrinkly. I made a mental note to myself to take it home tonight and iron it.
“Uh…uhm…yeah, it’s great to see you too.” There was a clatter, and Eddie dropped a pair of tongs on the floor.
I heard the front door bell tinkle, letting me know that we had customers. Giving Eddie a small smile, I left the kitchen and grabbed a couple of menus off the front counter.
Laura’s eyes were wide as I passed her and I wondered what that look was for.
It took me a moment to find the lone customer sitting by himself in the corner, and then Laura’s expression suddenly made sense.
Bennett was sitting at a table, trying very hard not to look at me.
I dropped the menus on the floor and immediately wanted to kick myself for acting like a complete dork in front of Bennett. I would not continue to make a fool out of myself in front of him. I would be cold, distant, composed, confident, magnetic and…jeez, I sucked at pep talks.
Picking the menus up again, I took a deep breath and walked towards him.
Seriously, what the heck was he doing here? He knew I’d worked here since I’d turned sixteen, so why would he come in here? There were plenty of other places for him to go to. Well, technically there was one other place, Mal’s Eatery, and it smelled like hog wash. Still, there were some nicer places out of town where he could go. There was no reason for him to come in here on the only other day he knew I would be working.
What made even less sense was the fact that he was alone. Usually, he was accompanied by his jock friends, throwing testosterone around left, right and center. I never saw him go anywhere without his posse. In fact, he cared so much about them that he’d lost Ashton’s friendship over it.
He didn’t even have his hoe bag with him today which was a surprise since they’d seemed so lovey-dovey two days ago at Halley’s.
Trying my best to act like his presence didn’t affect me, I threw back my shoulders and approached him with an air of indifference.
“Good afternoon, Sir,” I said, handing him a menu. “I’ll be back in a few minutes to take your order.”
I turned to go, but the sound of his voice stopped me. “I already know what I want.”
He looked up at me with those bright blue eyes of his and for a second I forgot just how much I hated him, how much I was supposed to hate him. All I saw was the guy I had loved and cared for.
The guy who held my hand when I cried. The guy who would stay up late at night talking to me the phone. The guy who teased me and then kissed me so I wouldn’t feel bad.
The illusion was shattered when he cleared his throat, and I gave him a hard look. “What can I get you?”
I pulled out a notebook and pen from my back pocket, even though I could easily memorize orders. Mostly, I just wanted to give myself something to do so I wouldn’t have to look at him while he spoke.
“Can I get a cheeseburger and fries?”
“And hold the pickles,” I said absently, and then wanted to kick myself for finishing his order. I was supposed to be acting cold and detached, not show familiarity towards him. I was so freaking stupid!
Bennett smiled wryly and nodded. “Yeah, hold the pickles.”
&n
bsp; I pretended to write all this down, but really I was just stabbing holes into the page because I was so angry with myself. “And anything to drink?” I knew he was going to ask for a chocolate milkshake because that’s what he always got.
“Chocolate milkshake.” Well, duh.
“Sure, your order will be out soon,” I said and headed back to the kitchen, ignoring Laura’s gaping mouth as I passed her.
As soon as I entered the kitchen, my resolve shattered and I leaned against the counter, burying my head in my hands as I tried to gather my scattered thoughts.
Crap, crap, crap.
I’d totally embarrassed myself when I’d dropped the menus, but then I just had to go and acknowledge the fact that I knew how he liked his burger. Why was I such a complete idiot? I was supposed to be acting like I didn’t know him. I wasn’t supposed to get distracted by his eyes or his smile, or anything else. I really wanted to kick myself or stick my head in the freezer.
“Uh…Hadie, are you okay?”
I jumped at the sound of the voice and then realized that Eddie was standing a few feet away watching me with concern. I’d been so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I’d completely forgotten that he was in here. Ya know, because where else would the cook be but in the kitchen?
“Yeah, um…I’m fine.” I gave him a weak smile. “We have an order for one cheeseburger with no pickles. And a serving of fries and a chocolate milkshake too.”
Eddie nodded, still looking worried as he put some fries into the deep fryer and then fired up the grill so he could start cooking the beef patty for the burger.
As I watched him, I decided to make the milkshake while I waited. When I didn’t have to take orders, I helped out in the kitchen so the cook didn’t have to do as much.
I measured out the milk, chocolate powder and ice cream, and put it all into the blender. Eddie gave me a nod, as if to say “thanks”, as he grabbed a plate and a tray to put the food on for when he was done.
When I turned off the blender, Eddie used that opportunity to speak. “So, what’s really wrong, Hadie?”
Sighing, I poured the milkshake into a glass and watched as Eddie flipped the patty over. “My ex-boyfriend is the customer that just came in.”
Eddie’s head shot in my direction and he frowned. “Your ex-boyfriend? The one who was friends with Ashton, right? Bennett something-or-rather.”
“Yeah, that’s the one.” I slumped against the counter again and fiddled with the edge of my apron. “I mean, I’m over him, but I’m not.”
Eddie was quiet for a moment and all I could hear was the sizzling of the fries as they cooked. Finally, he spoke. “It’s normal for you to still think about your ex and even have feelings for him. That doesn’t make you weak, it just makes you human.”
I met his hazel eyes for a second; they were kind and gentle, and I felt all my feelings rushing out. “But after what he did to me it makes me so angry that I feel something for him, you know? I don’t want to feel anything for him. I just want to see him the way I would see a stranger. I want to shut off all these emotions that he makes me feel. It’s so frustrating!”
I suddenly felt embarrassed that I had just vented all my frustration to Eddie. He was just so easy to talk to though, and he listened. Like, really listened.
Don’t get me wrong. Mariah, Lana and Estella were there for me too and always gave me great advice, but there was something therapeutic about confiding in someone who had a different perspective on the situation.
Eddie gave me a sad smile as he began plating up the food. “There’s nothing wrong with what you’re feeling. It just shows that you care, and that’s a good thing. It’s better than being cold and unfeeling or treating others badly because you don’t give a damn. Stay just the way you are and I promise you, one day you’ll wake up and Bennett won’t mean a thing to you.”
I held my breath as Eddie’s words sunk in. He was right. It wasn’t wrong of me to still think about Bennett, because I really had cared about him and it was natural to miss that. As for Bennett, it was so easy for him to move on with someone else because he obviously hadn’t cared about me. But I wasn’t like him, and I was glad that I never would be.
“You seriously give the best advice ever. You’re like Dr. Phil, but better looking.” I walked over to him and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you, Eddie. You’re the best.”
Eddie’s face flamed up and he mumbled something incoherent and busied himself with wiping down the already-clean counter. Grabbing the tray, I placed the milkshake on it and walked back out to where Bennett was sitting.
Now that I really paid attention, his posture was rigid, like he was thinking about bolting out the door at any second. As long as he bolted after he paid, I didn’t really care.
“Here you go,” I said, picking up the plate of food, and then the milkshake, and putting it down in front of him. I hugged the tray to my chest as I took a step back. “Can I get you anything else?”
Bennett looked up at me with those sky blue eyes of his, and for a second he looked conflicted. Finally, he shook his head and popped a fry in his mouth. “Nah, I’m good.”
With a nod, I headed back to the counter where Laura was watching us in earnest. It was obvious that she thought Bennett was hot. Everyone thought he was hot. Even me.
Before she could barrage me with numerous questions about him, the bell chimed again and I gratefully turned towards the entrance to see who had walked in.
My heart leapt in my chest when I found Lincoln standing there, looking at me in confusion. And he wasn’t alone either. He was with an older guy who looked so much like him that it was easy to guess that this was his dad.
As I turned back to the counter to grab two menus, I saw that Laura’s mouth was hanging open once more. “Holy smokes! Who is that?”
“Lincoln Bracks,” I said, smiling at the look on her face.
Bennett was quickly forgotten as she took in the sight of Lincoln. “Oh. My. Gosh. He is, like, one of the hottest guy I’ve ever seen.” Her eyes darted back to Bennett as if to compare him to Lincoln, and she nodded. “Yep, definitely the hottest. I mean, there’s this guy in my year, Hunter Hammond, and he’s still the hottest, but he’s a total man whore so…”
“Laura, I better go and seat these customers,” I cut in. Once Laura started talking about boys, she didn’t stop until she had analyzed every single guy she thought was hot. I was definitely not sticking around to find out which one had the nicest feet.
As I approached Lincoln, my insides began to warm up just by being close to him. He gave me this giddy feeling that no one else ever had. I certainly couldn’t blame Laura for checking him out. The boy was fine.
“Hi, Lincoln!” I said cheerfully. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
Lincoln frowned and glanced around the diner. “I didn’t know you worked here.”
The cold tone of his voice threw me off, and my upbeat mood faltered. “Um, I told you I worked here when I was showing you around town.”
His frown deepened and he looked at his dad. “Dad, do you wanna go somewhere else?”
My brow furrowed and I pressed my lips together, trying not to show how hurt I was. Why was Lincoln acting so weird? He’d been perfectly fine today at school. I mean, he’d threatened everyone away from me for God’s sake! He obviously cared about me, so why was he acting like this?
“Why? What’s wrong with eating here?” his dad asked, looking between me and his son.
Lincoln sighed and refused to meet my eye. “Nothing, Dad. Let’s just eat and get the hell out of here.”
His words stung me and tears actually pricked at my eyes. Lincoln was never like this. I mean, sure, when he’d first come to town he’d been a bit withdrawn, but he’d quickly changed his tune and warmed to me. Or so I’d thought.
Either way, his attitude towards me hurt me in a way I couldn’t explain. I’d been so closed off to boys before he’d gotten here. I’d been determined never to get close to
a boy the way I had with Bennett, but Lincoln had broken through. We had shared some great moments together, yet here he was acting like I was a complete stranger. Like he didn’t want to know me.
I followed the both of them to a booth by the window and handed them their menus. Lincoln didn’t acknowledge me at all, and I swallowed down the lump that had formed in my throat.
“Uh…I’ll be back soon,” I said, before fleeing to the sanctuary of the kitchen.
Chapter Fifteen
Lincoln
“Do you know that girl?” Dad asked as he flipped through the menu.
I didn’t look up at him as I pretended to read the menu when really my mind was elsewhere. On Hadie.
I really had forgotten that Hadie worked here, and it pissed me off that I had forgotten something so simple. I was losing my damn mind.
“She goes to my school.”
“She looked upset.” Dad gave me a probing look with those eyes that were so like mine.
I shrugged. “She’s probably going through some girly stuff. You know what women are like.”
“I can’t argue with that, son,” he said and went back to looking through his menu.
Once his attention was off me, my mind shot back to the fact that Hadie worked here. I really didn’t remember her telling me, but it was too late now. I was already here. Why did she have to run into me on a bad day? On a day that I felt like shunning the world and not talking to anyone? On days like these, I really came across as an ass.
The last thing I wanted to do to Hadie was hurt her, but the closer I got to her the more inevitable it was that she would end up getting hurt. I’d already warned her that I was no good for her, but that hadn’t worked. She was stubborn as hell when she wanted to be and didn’t like being told what to do. We’d become closer and I was scared. Scared of hurting her. Scared of losing her.