by Parker, Syd
Sarah laughed. “Tell me how you really feel.”
“Maybe I better not. I’d rather you not kick me out just yet. My room isn’t ready yet, and the hallway is a bit uncomfortable.”
“Okay, fine, you didn’t like Evan. What did I see in her?” Sarah tapped her lips with her forefinger. “Now, I’m not sure. At the time, I thought we had a lot in common. She was in the same field, liked a lot of the same things, I was attracted to her. Nothing amazing, but it was good, I guess.”
“Good’s okay, I suppose.” Remy said quietly. She hadn’t liked Evan. She knew her from her time chasing, and prior to Sarah, her reputation had preceded her. She played the field with no regard to any of the other players. And, she knew for a fact, if she was in a relationship, it hadn’t kept her from sleeping around. That was the one rule Remy had lived by, she didn’t cheat. “So, what happened with her?”
Sarah looked at her askance. “Like you don’t know?”
“I can speculate.” Remy smiled ruefully. “I’m sorry, Bonneville. You deserve better.”
“Thanks. I think so too. If she hadn’t have left me, I would have broken it off anyway. Especially when I found out she’d been sleeping around pretty much the entire time we were together. I’m a bit naïve, and I guess she figured she could get away with it and I would be none the wiser.”
“Naïve or not, you didn’t deserve that.” Remy’s voice was hard, the edge unmistakable. She didn’t agree with Evan cheating on anyone, but especially on Sarah. They had never dated, but she felt protective of her nonetheless. It may have been one night to Sarah, but to Remy, it was a night that set off a series of events that changed the course of her life. It was the point in her space—time continuum that had altered her intended course and set her off on a totally different path that had traveled in a parallel line with its mate.
Now, she only had the hard job of convincing Sarah that they had met for a reason and fate had kept them together for a reason. Easier said than done, she was finding out. “I guess the TV gig came at a pretty good time.”
“It did. Thankfully, I was able to replace Evan pretty quickly.”
“And, thankfully for C, you hired the future love of her life.”
Sarah laughed softly. “Crazy, isn’t it? How things work out? That they just happened to end up meeting through us.”
“Very.” Remy turned on her side and propped her head on her hand. “What about us?”
“What do you mean?” Sarah quirked an eyebrow. “What about us?”
“I just think that we keep running into each other for a reason. Someone is trying to tell us something.”
“Yeah, that someone is telling us all the tornadoes usually fall in the same place.” Sarah laughed. “It’s a coincidence, Remy.”
“Is it?” Remy voiced her disbelief. “You haven’t ever wondered why our lives are so intertwined? That maybe our lives keep overlapping because we are meant for more than just a fling.”
Sarah shook her head. She didn’t want to admit she had thought about that. There were lots of chasers and yet, Remy was always the one she ran into. It seemed too preordained to be merely chance, but she wouldn’t admit that to Remy or to herself. Admitting that, meant admitting that she had also thought, if only briefly, that theirs was a story not yet finished. Maybe one day she would allow herself to feel that, but not today. “We’re just lucky, I guess. That, and we are two of the best chasers around. It stands to reason that knowing the weather and following our gut would put us in the same place more often.”
“Hmph.” Remy snorted in disbelief. “Why is it so hard for you to let me in? I’m not that girl from eight years ago, Sarah.” She chose to say Sarah’s name, hoping that she would understand she was serious and not just trying to get back in her pants. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
Sarah paled. Wasn’t that what was really bothering her? Hadn’t that been the issue all along? Evan had used her, taken what she wanted and given nothing in return. And, when she was done, she walked away, not caring about the mess she left behind. It had nothing to do with misplaced pride and Sarah’s solemn vow not to repeat mistakes of yester years. “It’s not that easy, Remy. I know you think it should be, that I’m over complicating things. I won’t deny that I am attracted to you. Probably more so than I was eight years ago. I’ll admit I do feel something for you, how could I not? That night may have seemed like nothing, but it meant everything. But, I’ve grown since then and I’ll be damned if I’m going to repeat the same mistakes I did. I don’t know what you’re looking for, but it isn’t me. I’m not that woman.”
Remy sighed loudly. “So, that’s it, end of discussion, just like that?”
“I’m afraid it has to be.” Sarah’s face was set in determination, but her eyes waivered. The eyes always gave her away. That was the one thing Remy could always count on to gauge her feelings.
Remy swallowed the lump in her throat. No matter what Sarah’s eyes were telling her, she still wasn’t going to get out of her own way long enough to realize they could have a great future together. She rolled herself off the bed and stretched her body out, yawning loudly.
Sarah’s eyes were glued to Remy. Her shirt had come untucked and her abs rippled with every move. Her gaze never left the smooth skin peeking out at her. Her eyes traveled further up, drinking in her small, round breasts, perfectly outlined by her tight tee—shirt. Sarah gulped and licked her lips unaware that Remy was transfixed by the look on her face. A look certainly reserved for a lover, but nakedly displayed on Sarah’s face for the world to see.
Remy glanced at her watch, toying with the idea of calling Sarah out. A person just couldn’t look at her like that and not expect to be ravaged. “I think I’m going to kick your cousin out. I’m beat.”
Sarah nodded quietly. “Probably a good idea.” She stood up, stopping next to Remy. “Listen, are you okay with this? I mean, you’re fine with us just being…”
Remy silenced her with a look. “No, I’m not, but you haven’t given me much choice.”
Sarah couldn’t move. Remy’s gaze rooted her to the floor. She was captivated and lost in Remy’s eyes. “Why?”
“Why what?” Remy stepped closer, her body brushing Sarah’s.
“Why can’t you just let me go?”
“Because of this.” Remy wrapped her hand around Sarah’s neck and pulled her face to hers. She brushed her lips over Sarah’s before she could pull away. She lingered in her softness, tasting the Reisling on her tongue.
Sarah closed the space between them, melding her body with Remy’s, their curves fitting together perfectly. Her body was no longer hers to command. In this second, she belonged to Remy. Her tongue tangled with Remy’s, eliciting currents of excitement that pooled in her center. All the nights of waking up aroused fueled her hunger. She pushed her doubts to the back of her mind and gave herself to Remy.
Remy groaned as waves of pleasure nipped at her subconscious. Her mouth fit perfectly over Sarah’s and kissing her was magical. Her tongue danced inside her mouth and her body ached to touch her. Pulling on every bit of strength she had, she broke the kiss and rested her forehead on Sarah’s.
Their breaths were ragged, their pulses hammering wildly. When she could finally breathe again, she rubbed her knuckles over Sarah’s cheek. “Why?”
“Why what?” Sarah whispered, trying to keep her knees from buckling.
“Why can’t I make you love me?” Remy’s voice was ragged with desperation and hunger. She pushed Sarah away gently and smiled. “Good night, Bonneville.”
It would be so easy to love you, if only I could let myself. Sarah watched Remy leave, wishing she could find the strength to beg her to stay. She pressed her fingers to her swollen lips and hoped fate knew what she was doing, because she sure as hell didn’t.
Chapter 15
Sarah rubbed her eyes tiredly. She hadn’t slept well last night. She had only managed to fall into fits of restless sleep, haunted by memories of Remy and
their kiss. She took the cup of coffee Parker handed her, ignoring her smirk.
Not letting it slide, Parker nudged her shoulder, almost tipping the cup out of her hand. “Oh shit, I’m sorry, Cuz. So, another sleepless night, huh?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to keep you up.” Her brow furrowed. “Wait a minute. No, I’m not sorry. It’s because of your little ass I can’t sleep.”
Parker took a step back, confused. “How’s it my fault?”
“If you weren’t off gallivanting around with Carmen all night, Remy would not be in my room, and she certainly wouldn’t have kissed me last night.” Sarah slapped her hand over her mouth. Just as soon as the words tumbled out of her mouth, she wished she could take them back. “I mean, well, can we rewind that?”
“Oh, hell no!” Parker yelled excitedly. “There are no take backs. So, my Cuz actually isn’t asexual. I knew something was going on with you two. Now dish.”
“First of all, nothing is going on. It was just a kiss. Second, of course, I’m not asexual, I’m related to you. How could that even be remotely possible?”
Parker snickered. “Okay, okay. I know, you’re all Ms. Sexy Thang, shaking your sexy booty.”
Sarah pretended to smack Parker’s arm. “Okay, now you’re just mocking me.”
“Maybe a little.” Parker’s eyes twinkled mischievously. “Back to the business at hand. First of all, a kiss is never just a kiss. Believe me. And, second of all, you have got to tell me everything. Do not leave a sister in the dark.”
Sarah chuckled, obviously amused with Parker’s attempt to be funny. “Fine. We hung out, she kissed me. There’s nothing exciting to tell.”
“Ooooh, girl.” Parker drawled. “Why are you lying to me? Your ears are red, you lying sack of shit. We have a long damn drive today, and you, my dear Cuz, are going to tell me everything.”
Sarah sighed. Remy was right, she didn’t tell her personal life to anyone, Parker included. She just wasn’t one for sharing her feelings and getting all mushy. All her life, she’d been raised with the idea that you didn’t cry and you sure as hell didn’t talk about shit, except hunting and football. Even when her brother died, no one talked about it. No one grieved publicly. God, I really do have a fucked up family.
“I’m waiting.” Parker drummed her fingers on the console impatiently. She glanced at her watch and tapped it to make sure it was still working. When she spoke again, there was no mistaking the sarcasm. “Yep, still waiting.”
“God, do you ever quit?” Sarah asked with a laugh.
Parker smirked lasciviously. “Fortunately, for Carmen, I don’t. I’m like the Energizer bunny. I take a licking and keep on ticking.”
Sarah rolled her eyes and shook her head. “That is just like you to make a joke about a pink rabbit with vibrating ears.”
Parker snorted out loud. “Oh no, you didn’t just make a joke about a vibrator?”
“See, I know about toys.” Sarah said smugly. “I did go to college. You didn’t actually think the only thing I ever did was study, did you?”
“Mmm, mmm, mmm. I’ll be damned.” Parker slapped her knee. “Guess there is more to my little Cuz than I gave you credit for. I’m guessing that means there might be more to the Remy story than you are divulging.”
Sarah blushed and held up her thumb and forefinger. “Maybe a little bit.”
“Oh, I knew it!” Parker exclaimed. She turned in the seat and faced Sarah. “Out with it.”
“Okay, when you asked how Remy and I knew each other, I may not have been entirely forthcoming.”
“No shit, Sherlock. Didn’t take a genius to figure that one out.”
“We met about eight years ago, right after the Stockton tornado. I was working as a meteorologist, covering a line of storms in Kansas that Remy had followed. I fell in love…” Sarah glared at Parker. “Don’t oooh me. I didn’t fall in love with her, I fell in love with chasing after hearing her talk about it. I also fell for her lines that night. We ended up sleeping together.”
“Oh fuck. That is juicier than I thought. I figured you for a hot and heavy make out session, but you slept with her. No fucking way!”
“Yes, Sarah has had sex.” Sarah sounded like a robot, teasing Parker.
“So, was it good?”
Sarah’s face reddened and she felt her chest tighten. “This is very hard to admit to, but yes, it was fan—fucking—tastic. I haven’t been with anyone since then who has made me feel like Remy does.”
Parker grinned wickedly. “So, let me guess, Remy hasn’t forgotten either, and she’s spent the last eight years trying to rekindle the fire.”
“Yes.” Sarah admitted quietly. “And, she surprised me with the kiss last night.”
“So, what’s the big deal? You hooked up once, what’s stopping you now?”
Sarah shrugged. “I spent the last eight years replaying that night in my head with the hopes of reminding myself never to make the same mistake again.”
“Why is it a mistake? Remy’s a great girl. You could do a lot worse.”
“I know. I just can’t open myself up and…”
“Get hurt again.” Parker finished her sentence. “So what, you’re going to be a storm chasing nun for the rest of your life?”
“Funny.” Sarah looked at Parker askance. “No, I’m not going to take a vow of celibacy and be a nun, but I’m also not going to sleep with Remy again.”
“Why the hell not?” Parker asked incredulously. “Especially, if it’s the best fuck you ever had.”
“God, could you be any more crude?”
Parker waggled her eyebrows. “Don’t tempt me. I just don’t get it. I mean you say she’s the best relations you ever had. She obviously wants you, and I’ve seen the way she looks at you when she thinks no one is looking. She’s halfway in love with you already.”
“Don’t say that. That only makes it worse.”
“How?”
“Don’t you see, it’s always worse when emotions get involved. Look at us, eight years later, and neither one of us has been able to let go. Giving in to our attraction will only lead to heartache.”
“I’m confused.” Parker furrowed her brow. “I don’t understand why you think you’re going to get hurt.”
“I know Remy, and I know her reputation. I ignored Evan’s past and look where it got me.”
“Fuck Evan.” Parker spat out. “I never saw her look at you the way Remy does.”
“Can we just let it go?” Sarah pleaded softly. “This is why I don’t talk about stuff with you, or anyone else for that matter. I hate talking about my feelings.”
“Fine, whatever.” Parker shook her head. “I guess if you want to let your shit grow back together from non—use, that’s your prerogative.”
“There is seriously something wrong with you.” Sarah rolled her eyes at her cousin. Her comments shouldn’t surprise her. Parker could be incredibly inappropriate and had spent a lot of time in detention growing up. It wasn’t any different twenty years later.
“You have no idea.” Parker smirked. “You should have heard me last night…”
“La, la, la.” Sarah took her hands off the wheel and put her fingers in her ears. “I can’t hear you.”
Parker busted out laughing. “Oh yeah, better not tell you anything to tempt you out of your life of celibacy.”
Sarah smacked her arm. “Shut up. I am not celibate.” Or am I? Now that she thought about it, she kind of was. She hadn’t been with anyone since Evan, and that hadn’t been very often.
“Mmm—hmmm. You just keep telling yourself that.” Parker pretended to study the radar on her phone all the while humming “Celibacy Blues” by Rascal Flatts.
“I know what you’re doing.”
“What?” Parker shrugged innocently, but her eyes twinkled mischievously. “Is it working?”
“No.” Sarah tried to stop the corners of her mouth from creeping up. “Maybe.”
“I’ll settle for a maybe.” She flas
hed the phone at Sarah. “So, where we headed to boss?”
“Really?” Sarah tried to be stern, but she couldn’t help laughing at Parker. “Alabama. There’s something brewing down there. Could get crazy.”
“Nothing on the radar right now.” Parker countered.
“Yeah, but there is an upper—level trough moving across the Southern Plains and a mid—level jet stream moving in from the north. If that jet stream gets in behind the trough, we may be in for what us meteorologists like to call the perfect storm. For us, it’s a once in a lifetime thing.”
Parker’s face turned several shades paler. “Worse than Oklahoma?”
Sarah could hear the concern in her voice and her heart went out to her. “I’m sorry Parker. I should never have asked you to do this.”
“No, no. It’s okay. Beats ‘What can the brown do for you?’” Parker said sarcastically, referring to her job driving for UPS. “Although, I did get a lot of pussy doing that job.”
Sarah groaned loudly. “Is that all you think about?”
“Pretty much.” Parker smiled smugly. “Now, if they had a job doing that, I would be so money.”
“Seriously, do you listen to yourself?”
“Well, no, I never thought about taping myself having sex.” Parker waggled her eyebrows. “Just kidding. I can’t help. It is all I think about. It’s sooo good. I pretty much worship women. I am probably a guy trapped in a lesbian’s body.”
“You’re probably a lesbian trapped in a man’s mind stuck in a lesbian’s body.”
“Yeah, that’s probably closer to the truth.” Parker chuckled. “Admitting I have a problem is the first step towards recovery.”
“Uh—uh, I don’t think there’s any hope for you. You’re a functioning sex—aholic. I’ve just got to accept it.”
Parker snorted. “I’m trying. At least, I’m limiting it to one woman lately. And, I’m kind of thinking I might actually be becoming a one—woman lesbian. I’m letting the brown do for me.”
“That’s so mature of you, Parker.” Sarah teased sarcastically. “There might actually be hope for you yet. Although, I’m pretty sure it’s politically incorrect to call Carmen the brown girl.”