Louisa had slept a little but woke very early on Friday morning and immediately worried about what the day would bring. She tried to push the fear back, but beneath the surface her thoughts jammed up, keeping her trapped in gut-wrenching anxiety. As Leo lay asleep beside her she listened to his breathing and wished they could always be together. But not like this, not with this horrible dread gnawing at her. When he opened his eyes he smiled at her.
“It’s going to be all right,” he said. “We must believe that.”
As she shook her head, it sank home just how much Conor meant to her. “I have this sick feeling in my stomach.”
“That’s the nerves. It’s natural. I feel pretty sick myself.”
They dressed quickly and went out for a walk along the ramparts where she gazed out at the sea, so gray and still and full of secret wrecks. She glanced up at the heavy sky. Rain was on its way again. The wind got up and everything seemed so fragile, as if one large wave could sweep her world away.
She turned toward him and he held her against his chest. There were no words for this, just animal fear and animal comfort. He brushed the hair from her eyes and she nodded in answer to his silent question. But she wasn’t coping and he knew it. He took her hand and they walked back home.
By ten o’clock she was so tense she could hardly draw breath. She felt tears pricking her eyelids but forced herself not to cry. They waited in the sitting room, circling the furniture, sitting for a while and then pacing again, every few minutes checking their watches. She held on to Leo’s hand from time to time, squeezing tightly.
Roberts had said plainclothesmen would be watching all the likely areas but still Louisa worried it might all go wrong. As the minutes ticked by, her heart slammed against her ribs and she could see Leo growing more tense. Jonathan arrived with the other half of the money, and by half past eleven Leo was preparing to set off with the package.
Once he’d gone, Louisa was beside herself as she waited, thinking about Conor and now Leo too. Memories of the child flashed in her head and she recalled the day she had first seen him, and how horrified she’d been by his resemblance to Elliot. Gradually a delicate bond had developed between them, although she knew how achingly vulnerable he was, and that he was still suffering at the terrible loss of both his parents. Would go on doing so. Would go on remembering. Hurting. He had been through too much, and it would be unthinkable if anything awful happened to him now.
Now that he was out of her reach, out of the reach of any of them, she went up to his bedroom and picked up Albert the bear, then breathed in the smell of Conor’s tousled hair still lingering on his pillow. She held the old bear to her nose and, as pain ripped through her, she cradled it like a baby. Please God. Keep him safe. Please. She stood in silence for a little longer, yearning to bring him back at any cost, and then she began tidying up his things. He’d like a tidy room, wouldn’t he? Be pleased that she’d made it nice for him when he came home? A sharp intake of breath. When, not if. When, not if.
She bent down to look under his bed and came across some drawings he’d hidden there. She gazed at the childish images of the people in his life. There was Zinnia, with her long red hair, and a man with green eyes and dark curly hair, clearly Elliot. There was a picture of Conor himself in a fishing boat with a red-headed man who was obviously Leo. But he’d also drawn a picture of the new puppy, Oliver, and finally one of Louisa herself riding her bicycle beside Conor riding his. It meant a lot to her, and tears moistened her eyes as she saw she had been included in his world.
She opened his half-full laundry basket, fished out a few items, then carried them down to the laundry room. It wasn’t her job to wash their clothing but she had to keep busy or the anxiety would swallow her up. She dropped a pair of pajamas, some shorts and two shirts into their new Wringer Washer, their first electric-powered washer. She still sent their larger items to the dhobi, but nowadays more and more people were having these new machines installed and theirs was particularly useful with Conor around. Once the machine was running she left the laundry room and went out to the garden, where Jonathan was sitting on a bench staring into the distance.
“Mind if I join you?” she said.
He patted the bench beside him.
“Oh God. I don’t think I can bear this.”
“I know.”
Oliver lay on his back at her feet and she bent down to tickle his tummy. “Conor loves Oliver,” she said with a catch in her voice.
“Keep strong,” her father said.
She watched her father and saw his brows knit closely together, the worry clearly visible. Then she bent down and, picking the puppy up for comfort, began fondling his soft ears. The waiting had become unbearable, her mind taking her into dark corners where she cowered in fear. She felt as if her life had unraveled and was now as loosely woven as a piece of worn household linen. She gazed at her watch every few minutes and, when an hour had passed, took a deep breath before speaking. “Surely we’d have heard by now?”
“Not necessarily.”
“I should have gone myself. Do you think Leo is safe?”
“He’s a man who can handle himself. Don’t worry.”
“I can’t help it.”
They shared a long silence as Louisa closed her eyes to pray. Jonathan took hold of her hand and squeezed it, and she knew he was as worried as she was, but doing his best to hide it.
At a sound in the street, Oliver jumped down and rushed to the garden gate. Louisa stood to see what was happening and watched as the gate swung open. Her mouth went dry as Conor ran into the garden followed by Leo. Everything went still as Conor froze, even the wind seemed to drop, but with her heart in her throat, Louisa held her nerve and reached out her trembling hands to the child. They gazed at each other momentarily, and she wasn’t sure what he would do. She wanted to hold him, protect him from harm, never let him go, but the first move had to come from him. The wait seemed to go on, but then he took a step forward and within moments he was running to her with tears in his eyes and then flinging himself into her arms. Her heart somersaulted with relief as she carried him to the bench where she sat, hugging him to her, wrapping him in all the love she could summon. Jonathan stood and went across to Leo to shake his hand.
“Well done, young man,” he said.
Meanwhile Louisa was whispering in Conor’s ear. “You’re safe now, sweetheart. Nothing bad is going to happen again.”
She wiped away his tears with her fingers. “It’s all over. And look, here’s Oliver come to kiss you all better.”
The dog jumped up on to the bench and licked Conor’s face.
“There, you see, Oliver will look after you.”
“And Leo,” he said, glancing up at her, his green eyes still swimming with tears.
“And Leo,” she said.
“And you?”
“Of course.”
The rains were now completely over and on a gorgeous early December day Louisa and Conor were walking deep in the cinnamon plantation. Conor was excited to be taking her to one of his special places and, when they reached a small clearing surrounded by rhododendron bushes, he spread his arms and twirled around.
“This is my place,” he said.
Louisa listened to birds ruffling their feathers and shifting in the trees, then sniffed the cinnamon and could almost taste the salty ocean.
“Do you like my place?” he said.
“I love it. Thank you for showing me.”
“Now we have to throw a pebble as far as we can and then walk around in a circle. I’ll show you.”
He selected a pebble and, with a furrowed brow, concentrated, then threw it to see how far it would go. After that he walked around the enclosed clearing, scuffing his sandals in the twigs and leaves crackling beneath his feet.
“Your turn now.”
Louisa copied Conor a
nd they both laughed at how seriously she did it. She reached out her hand to him and he took it. “Ready for your birthday tea?”
He nodded and grinned at her.
They made their way through the trees along paths that had now become familiar to Louisa. While she still maintained her household in Galle, and Sapphire was about to start trading, after a longer delay than she’d expected, she had spent much of the last two months with Conor and Leo at the plantation.
Leo had explained that after he’d left the money for the kidnappers at the warehouse, the police had trailed them in the green car, and had managed to apprehend De Vos and Cooper at an empty house near the beach a few miles outside Galle, where they had held Conor.
The only dark cloud on the horizon now was the custody battle that lay ahead. As the date for the hearing drew closer, Leo’s brow had become more furrowed.
It was too early to predict what would happen, but they were both worried about the outcome. In the meantime, Leo had given Louisa more than enough proof that he loved her, and she envisaged spending the rest of her life with him. They’d discussed marriage as a way of strengthening his case for adopting Conor, but had decided that rushing ahead wasn’t the right way to start married life. It should be special and not tied to anything else. He had, however, given her a diamond engagement ring that had once been his grandmother’s.
They reached the top of the hill and Conor clapped his hands when he saw a table set out in front of the house, laid with plates and glasses. And with eight balloons, two tied to each corner.
“Where’s the jelly?” he said, as Leo came out to join them.
“We can’t bring out the food until everyone’s here.”
“When are they coming? When?”
Louisa gazed at Leo. He’d tidied himself up: the stubble was gone and he wore a crisp white shirt that showed off his glorious tan. She felt a prickle of pleasure.
They listened to the sound of a car coming up the track.
“They’re here. They’re here!” shouted Conor.
The car pulled up and Jonathan, Margo and Irene climbed out. Louisa and Leo exchanged looks, both clearly surprised to see Irene.
Margo walked to the back of the car and opened the trunk, then brought out an armload of presents.
“Presents first, I think, and then birthday cake,” Leo said.
“Yes. Yes.” Conor clapped his hands again.
“Happy birthday,” Jonathan said and handed him a big square box.
Conor tore at the wrapping paper. “It’s a train,” he yelled. “A real train!”
“It’s the Lionel Blue Comet train set,” Jonathan said. “It’s a copy of a real American train called the Blue Comet that ran in New Jersey. It was painted blue to match the Jersey seashore. Take the roof off and look inside.”
Conor took the roof off and they all peered in, exclaiming at the intricacy of the detail. Everything from the seats to the electric lights looked so real.
“That must have cost a fortune, Pa,” Louisa said quietly.
“It did, but look at the child’s face! And, after all, we got our money back.”
After that there were more presents, of jigsaws, books and a painting set. Finally, Irene held out a small parcel and he unwrapped a beautiful, leather-bound sketchbook. “For you to draw all your insects,” she said, all smiles. “And I have more presents for later.”
Louisa was worried about why Irene had come, but after they’d had their fill of jelly and cake, while Margo and Jonathan helped Conor set up the train set, Irene asked for a quiet word with Leo and Louisa. They went upstairs to the sitting room, and once they were seated, she began.
“It’s only fair to tell you I have been thinking things over.”
Louisa glanced at Leo, wondering what this might mean.
“After a long talk with Harold…by the way, he sends his apologies for not being here, pressure of work, you know. He’s due to retire any day now but they keep him at it. Anyway, I talked with Margo too, and came to a realization.”
“Oh?” Louisa said.
“I now see that by fighting for custody of Conor I was trying to bring Elliot back. Margo made me realize it was unfair to the child to expect him to take Elliot’s place.”
Louisa nodded.
“Margo also made it clear that because of Conor’s illegitimacy none of my friends would be able to accept him, and that would be hard to bear.”
“Go on,” Louisa said.
“I can’t bring back my dead son and using the child to try to do so would be a terrible burden for him. I can’t bring back either of my dead sons, just as you, Louisa, can’t bring back your stillborn baby girl.”
“No,” Louisa said.
“It wasn’t an easy decision. I had my heart set on rearing the child. It was hard to let him go. I felt as if I was letting Elliot go all over again and it hurt. But Conor isn’t Elliot—and he belongs with you, Leo. I’m too old to take on a child now.”
“It’s a brave decision,” Leo said. “And I’m truly grateful.”
“Well, since I have withdrawn my application, I suspect you will be granted full legal custody, and you will soon after that be able to adopt him.”
Louisa felt overjoyed. Nothing had prepared them for this turnaround.
“My only condition is that you will bring him to see me from time to time.”
“Goes without saying,” Leo said in a gruff voice. “We will make sure he sees his grandmother regularly. You have my word: you will be important in his life. Thank you, Irene.”
Irene dabbed her eyes with a hanky. “I made many mistakes with Elliot. I realize that now. And although I may live to regret it, I see this as the only way ahead. We have to do what’s right for the child, don’t we?”
Louisa glanced at Leo, who was smiling broadly. He stood and came across to Irene. Then he held out his hand to her. “Thank you. Thank you so much.”
* * *
—
A little later Louisa and Margo were discussing what had happened.
“I’m glad it worked,” Margo said. “It was terribly hard for Mum to climb down. You know what she’s like. But in the end, she saw the truth.”
“Thank you so much for bringing her around.”
“Now, tell me what’s happening with De Vos and that awful man, Cooper.”
“They’re still in police custody and their trial comes up soon. There’s little doubt they’ll be going away for a very long time. Abducting a child is a very serious charge.”
“Thank God for Leo. I’m so glad you and he are now together properly, after everything you’ve been through. I really like him.”
“What happened brought us closer. The agony we felt knowing we might lose Conor made us realize we had no time to waste.”
“I have news too. The divorce won’t come through for quite a while yet, but William is arriving back here next month.”
“Have you told Irene?”
“No. While I was working on her to change her mind about Conor, I didn’t want anything else to get in the way.”
“I suppose that means you’ll be going back to England?”
Margo nodded. “His work is there and I’ll easily get a job nursing again.”
“But you’ll marry here?”
Margo grinned. “Only if the divorce comes through in time.”
* * *
—
That evening, after everyone had gone, and Conor was tucked up in bed, Louisa and Leo were sitting side by side, covered in mosquito repellent, out on the veranda.
“Happy?” he said.
“More than I ever thought was possible.”
They gazed up at the indigo sky. The night was clear and warm, the heavens were lit by stars, and the air smelled of damp earth and woodsmoke.
“L
isten to the ocean,” she said, wishing she could see its silvery surface in the darkness. “It’s endless, isn’t it?”
“But we are not.”
“No.
He leaned over and though he gave her the lightest of kisses on the lips, she felt it throughout her entire body.
“We have to make the most of every moment,” she whispered as he touched the hollow of her neck.
“No more looking back,” he said. “But you never need to pretend with me. And I will understand if it isn’t always easy.”
She glanced up at the stars. A picture of Elliot entered her mind, but she shook her head and the image faded. She would no longer fear his silent haunting.
“No more Elliot,” she said. “No more anguish. No more dreams. Just here. Just now. Just you and me.”
“And Conor.”
“And Conor.”
Then they held hands and looked out over the sultry plantation night, with fireflies sparking among the bushes and the insistent sound of cicadas.
“This is so beautiful,” she said.
“As are you.”
Louisa knew there might be bumpy times ahead as they adjusted to their new life as a family, but she was happy, happier than she’d thought she would ever be, and together they would find their way through. The emporium would take up much of her time but she was strong now, stronger than she’d ever been before.
* * *
—
The sun was shining two days later as Louisa surveyed the emporium. The central area sparkled with sapphires in their glass cabinets, and the ebony counters shone: a wonderful contrast to the brilliance of the white walls, just as she had imagined it would be. Upstairs, in the gallery, Savi Ravasinghe’s paintings were hanging in pride of place, and in the first of the ground-floor rooms gorgeous silks shone with light reflected from the chandelier. The merchants were ready, just putting the final touches to their displays, and a table had been heaped with bottles of champagne and plates of canapés.
The Sapphire Widow Page 34