Kicking Eternity

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Kicking Eternity Page 23

by Ann Lee Miller


  She felt Drew tense. She gripped his arm trying to communicate she didn’t want him to do anything yet.

  “I read about what you’re going through.” She worked at keeping her tone conversational. “Up for days. No matter how much meth you took, you haven’t gotten the high you’re after.”

  “You don’t know what I’m going through,” Eddie said.

  “More meth isn’t going to do it for you.” She peered at him around Drew. “I don’t mean getting clean forever. You’ve got to come down all the way and start over to get the high you’re craving.”

  “I know what I need,” Eddie said through clenched teeth.

  “I’ll stay with you while you come down. Some people stay up for fifteen days. Do you want to feel frustrated that long?”

  “You think you know so much from books. You’ve never tried it.”

  Drew started to say something and she jabbed him hard in the ribs. This wasn’t the time to say anything about how Eddie tried to inject her.

  She had to keep Eddie talking. She knew tweakers were most dangerous when they stopped talking. “Since Drew’s going to be joining the family, why don’t you fill him in on stuff he needs to know about the Ziglers—family myths—like what ever happened to my Strawberry Shortcake blankie?”

  Eddie shifted his gaze from her to Drew.

  Drew held his hands out in front of him. “I gotta know this info—the sooner the better. Who wants to sign up for a family without full disclosure? So what happened to Rainey’s blankie?”

  “She swears I stole it and buried it in the back yard. Not so. I think Logan swiped it and put in the branches over the tree house. I remember seeing it flying like a flag around Christmas, but it was gone by spring.”

  “I was four. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you saw it.” Remember you love me. Remember life before meth. “Tell Drew about the lost city.”

  Eddie motioned with his head. “Let’s go.”

  There was no way she was letting Eddie get anywhere near camp. “The banks don’t open for hours.” She couldn’t believe how reasonable she sounded. “What’s one more story going to hurt?”

  “The lost city?” Drew prompted.

  “Rainey never played with dolls. Don’t think she’s great mom material. We were always under the house with five hundred match box cars building roads in the lost city, our version of Atlantis.” Eddie’s hand holding the gun trembled. “Enough of this.”

  Was that the silhouette of a policeman in a cap up in the dunes? It was gone now. Maybe she imagined it.

  “If you take this step, you’re becoming a criminal. Is that what you want—to have to hide the rest of your life or be in jail? Don’t you want to go to college, maybe become a real city planner—not just the lost city?”

  Drew inched closer to Eddie. She stuck to him trying to make it look like they hadn’t moved. What was Drew going to try?

  “I want you to come to my wedding. I want you to be an uncle to my kids.”

  Now she saw them—two policemen—crab-walking from the dunes across the sand. They were coming at Eddie from two directions.

  “Hand me the gun, Eddie. We’ll get through this together like we’ve gotten through everything else. I’ll put the gun back. I love you.” She stepped toward him, holding out her hand for the gun.

  Eddie’s arm shook. “I’ll shoot. I swear I’ll shoot.”

  She took another step and stopped. “Underneath it all, you love me. I don’t believe you’ll shoot me. Give me the gun.”

  All of a sudden she saw the flash of Drew’s dark T-shirt in front of her as he dove across the sand toward Eddie.

  The gun fired.

  Oh, God.

  Light from the distant streetlight glinted off the gun where it had been knocked several feet from Eddie.

  Eddie scrambled toward the gun.

  Two dark forms converged on Eddie in a flash of flesh hitting flesh, grunts.

  Was Drew shot?

  Drew crawled to his knees, spitting sand. Relief washed through her.

  Eddie lay belly-down on the sand. An officer kneed Eddie in the back and twisted his arm to a painful angle.

  The other policeman cuffed Eddie’s wrists together. “You’re lucky you didn’t get shot. You have your sister and her boyfriend to thank. Think about that when you’re in the lockup.” He hauled Eddie to his feet.

  Eddie thrashed away from the officer, fighting frantically to get away.

  The other officer clamped a meaty hand on Eddie’s scrawny arm. “Don’t go anywhere, you two, we’re going to need statements,” he said over his shoulder.

  The officers moved away toward the road, Eddie between them.

  Drew crushed her to him. “Thank God you’re okay. I’ve never been so scared in my life.”

  She pushed away a little so she could see his face. “Why did you dive for the gun? You could have gotten killed. He doesn’t trust you.”

  “I didn’t want Eddie to shoot you. I didn’t want the police to shoot Eddie—for you to have to deal with that.”

  “Sorry about the whole brother-in-law thing. I had to give Eddie a reason not to shoot you.”

  Drew gave her a crooked smile. “We’ll have to find a way to make an honest woman out of you.”

  “I’m ready to take your statements,” the officer who had cuffed Eddie said from the seawall.

  They pulled apart and the wind whistled between them.

  “It won’t take long. We’ll get your verbatim off the 911 call.”

  Drew grabbed his phone, still open, out of his pocket. “I forgot about it.”

  After answering questions, Raine walked over to the police car. Eddie brushed sand from his cheek with his shoulder of his old Fishin’ Cove Bait and Tackle T-shirt. She knew the slogan without reading it. We hook ‘em, you cook ‘em. She must have seen him wear that shirt a hundred times. She dragged her gaze to his. He looked at her through the partially open window. For a second she saw the gangly fourteen-year-old he used to be peering out of his eyes—afraid—before he smeared anger across his face.

  “I love you, Ed.”

  He looked away, his face hard.

  The officer leaned out the driver’s window. “Dispatch alerted the camp director, and he’s gotten an all-clear call, too.”

  The car drove away. Drew dropped an arm around her. She stood in the road watching the tail lights get smaller and smaller till the car turned a corner. Drew headed them toward camp.

  Eddie would be in a solitary holding cell tonight, the officer had told her. At least he’d be safe. She didn’t want to think any further than that. Her emotions seemed frozen. The only thing she knew was she was warm and safe tucked under Drew’s arm.

  When they stopped in front of her cabin, she turned into Drew’s chest. His arms went around her. “I don’t want to go inside.”

  “It’s okay. I’ll stay with you till you’re ready.”

  Exhaustion settled over her slowly. Her body relaxed. She wanted to sleep in Drew’s arms. She’d close her eyes for a minute and listen to Drew’s heart beat.

  “Hey.” Drew’s whisper startled her. “You’re falling asleep on your feet. Look, it’s almost sunrise.”

  The sky had lightened to rose. And at the end of the beach road, the horizon glowed pink.

  “Go inside.” Drew gently peeled her off him.

  She gripped his arm where the blond hairs curled. “Thanks. For protecting me. And Eddie.” I love you. She stood staring into his ocean blue eyes.

  “Go.” He turned her toward the cabin steps and gave her a push.

  Chapter 26

  Drew cracked his knuckles and stared at the cabin door a sleepy Rainey had walked through. Thinking about Rainey in bed was never a good idea—at least not when he was marginally interested in being “holy because God is holy.” He headed for his cabin. He needed to touch base with Jesse, fall on his knees and thank God Rainey was alive, then sleep.

  Rainey had clung to him for support.
She needed him—at least for a little while. He had been so hungry to hold her that he was almost grateful to Eddie.

  If he’d held Rainey in his arms thirty more seconds, he would have kissed her. Not good. Especially in her emotional state. At least he’d learned that lesson.

  Was God going to give him a clear answer about Sam? Maybe Sam’s ditching him was the answer. But it felt like there were still loose ends—like Cal, for one. Maybe Sam would find someone else. That would be plain enough. Please, God.

  #

  Raine scratched Antoine’s ears as she took a seat on the sofa across from Mom and Dad. Drew sat down next to her and held a hand toward Antoine. The dog backed his huge body under the end table to hide from Drew, then stuck his nose out for a gingerly sniff. They all laughed, in spite of Eddie’s invisible presence in the room.

  “I’m so glad you’re okay.” Dad’s face was pasty under a day’s worth of stubble.

  “You’ve told me six times today, Dad.”

  Dad shook his head. “When I think I could have lost you. I feel like I’ve been losing you for years.” His face looked sadder than she’d ever seen him.

  “It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I figured it out recently—why we never seem to get along. I used to share everything with you, but when I started keeping Eddie’s secrets, I had to close myself off from you.” She looked at Mom. “From both of you. I’m sorry.”

  Mom reached across the coffee table and squeezed her hand. “It’s okay, honey.”

  Dad sighed. “You thought you were protecting Eddie. I wish we’d known. We could have shared the burden.”

  “Drew told me I was enabling Eddie by not telling you about his addiction and by giving him money. But I didn’t see it till last night.”

  Mom gripped Dad’s arm. “We’ve suspected Eddie’s drug use for a long time. We’ve barely seen him the past few years. In a way, it’s almost a relief to find out he’s an addict. There’s a reason for the stealing, the callousness.”

  Dad looked at Drew. “Thank you for diving for that gun. If you hadn’t, the police might have killed him. At least now, we have hope he can beat the drug.”

  “Meth is one of the hardest drugs to get off,” Drew said. “It’s going to be a long haul.”

  “He may be in jail for an extended stay,” Dad said.

  Drew clasped his hands together. “Do you mind if I pray for Eddie?”

  Dad nodded. “I think I’m still in shock. We’d be grateful.”

  “Lord, nothing is too difficult for you. We pray that You will rescue Eddie from meth addiction. Please use however long he has in jail to heal him. Take away the psychological need that has developed. Give him a heart to know You as his God.”

  “Amen,” Mom said like a seal on Drew’s words.

  “I’m not going to see him for a week so he’ll have a chance to come down. I’ve seen all the drugged Eddie I care to see.” Raine yawned. “Haven’t caught up on my sleep yet.” She stood. “And I’ve been a brat about Africa. I’m staying home. For now. In my heart, I still feel God’s call to Africa. Someday, I’m going.”

  Dad came over to where she stood and wrapped her in a bear hug like he used to when she was a little girl. “I’m proud of you, honey. I stand by my decision because I love you.”

  Five minutes later Drew killed his truck engine in the camp parking lot. He yawned in the dark cab. “It’s catching.”

  Love and gratitude for Drew washed over her. She unbuckled her seatbelt and leaned toward him. She pressed her lips against the fine stubble on his cheek. “Thanks, Drew, for everything.”

  His expression was unreadable in the dim parking lot light. She slipped out of the truck and walked between the hedge and the Canteen toward her cabin.

  She wished it was only Sam she was up against. But God? Is it okay, Lord, for tonight, if I think about Drew’s kiss while I fall asleep?

  #

  Drew rubbed the pads of his fingers over the place Rainey kissed on his cheek. He slumped over the steering wheel.

  God, I am so sunk on this girl. Please, please can I have her?

  His patience had worn paper thin. He was an idiot for thinking God would answer. God gave him a brain, didn’t He? His brain said go after the girl you love. But what if….

  #

  Raine walked toward the beach in the still morning air. Dew clung to the grass, sparkling in fresh sun. Her feet moved quickly. She was eager to see Drew. After Eddie went to jail, she’d given up on avoiding Drew. She didn’t have it in her to stay away from him.

  Everything seemed normal—almost how it was before Sam showed up. Drew held her hands when they prayed for campfire, but he didn’t touch her otherwise. He’d hardly teased her in a week. Instead, his pensive eyes followed her. He looked away when she caught him. Maybe he was more shook up about Eddie almost killing them than he let on.

  She’d been strangely at peace about Eddie. This morning her easy banter with Eddie had come back to her mind suddenly in that place between sleep and wakefulness. She knew it was time to visit him at the jail.

  #

  Raine looked at Eddie through the computer monitor of the Volusia County Correctional Facility visitor’s carrel. Eddie stared with hooded eyes at something below the line where Formica met the monitor. But he was here. She hadn’t known whether he would agree to see her.

  She gripped the desk so tightly her fingers ached. Silence swam back and forth between them—and snapshots from the past: Laughter swirled the table while orange sun burned against the kitchen wall; Eddie scooped the carrots from her plate onto his when no one was looking. Around Eddie’s fifteenth birthday, his eyes slipped shut in a darkened auditorium—his hands and voice raised, reaching for God.

  The jail ‘scrubs’ hung on Eddie’s frame. Had he lost more weight in jail? She couldn’t tell.

  His eyes darted up and away—wounded, afraid. His jaw was hard.

  Drew had prayed this morning for the words she needed to say to Eddie, and now they ran through her head like a text message from God.

  She cleared her throat. “This is not who you are.” She flung her hand around. “It’s only what you’ve done. You’re a child of God. You’re forgiven. You’re loved by God. By me.”

  “I hate myself.”

  “Your name means ‘guardian.’ I remember you grabbing my hand to cross the street to the playground. We must have been six and seven. That’s who you are inside.”

  “I’m a screw-up. I’m going to be in the pen for a long time to prove it.” His voice was lifeless, void of hope.

  She didn’t want to think about that now. “Eddie, listen to me.”

  He looked up.

  “Your sins have been paid for. Someday, you’re going to get a second chance at life. You’ve lost your way, but you’ll find it again—and drag others out of the chasm with you.”

  Two tears plopped from the corners of his eyes, and he put his palm up to the camera.

  She matched her left to his right on the screen. “You’re a man worth loving.”

  His eyes bore into hers. “I’m sorry, sis. For everything.”

  “I forgive you.”

  #

  The rain eased off to a drizzle while Aly squinted at the three cars parked haphazardly along the road beside the beach. She’d taken her lunch break late, hoping to catch Cal at the beach while the surf was up.

  She hadn’t heard from him in the week since she told him she loved him. He needed to know she understood he was still in love with Raine. She was fine with friendship. Maybe later, something more. Yes, Cal’s car was the one parked closest to her.

  She looked toward the beach. Cal walked up the path through the saw-grass toward the road. He was bare-chested and dripping wet with his board tucked under one arm. His other arm draped over Evie, the girl who did the piercing at Stoney’s Tattoo. The polka dots on her string bikini showed through the sodden white T-shirt she wore. Aly imagined she could see the daisy tattooed to Evie’s left breast. Than
ks to Evie’s low-cut tops, she’d seen the tattoo every time she’d ever stopped by Stoney’s Tattoo.

  She recognized Cal’s look that kept straying below Evie’s chin, but she’d never seen it on him before. Her stomach went queasy.

  Cal stopped on the path and bent to kiss Evie. Aly didn’t want to watch Cal’s hand press the polka dots against his body, the major lip-lock; but she froze on the edge of the road.

  As the kiss ended, Cal looked up and caught her watching him. Evie’s eyes stayed down as she picked her way through the sandy pass.

  His lips flattened into a straight line, his eyes unreadable, as he stared at her.

  She used all her strength to lift her chin and spin away. She clutched her rain jacket hard against her stomach and walked away.

  #

  Drew lay back against the slope of the dune and watched purple clouds lumber across the sky. He’d accepted the Africa Cries job weeks ago, and now he felt like crap. He’d been noble, then—obeying God when it hurt. But this morning all he could think about was putting continents and oceans between him and Rainey. Ironic, Rainey was staying and he was going.

  He flung a stick into the wind and it flew back at him. Sam had stepped out of Facebook—and back again—leaving him with the closure he needed.

  There was no ring on Rainey’s finger. He had no qualms about going up against Cal. He’d tell Rainey how he felt and take a number. He still had nearly three weeks to win her. He could do it; he felt it in his bones.

  And he would. Except for God’s iron hand blocking him.

  He stood. “This sucks!”

  In the distance, wind whipped the waves into froth. Sand blew off the chin-high dunes around him. He could feel the grit in his teeth.

  He was Abraham with Rainey on the altar. And at this moment, he hated God.

  Wind pelted his face with intermittent rain. He glowered at God in the billowing clouds.

  He dropped his chin to his chest. “No matter what, You are God. My God.”

 

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