by Lisa Torquay
She sighed lengthy. “I am not complaining.” She breathed, wishing he suggested they go to his chamber. Now!
“You are the most passionate woman on the planet.” He nibbled the curve of her neck. “My good fortune!”
She held his shoulders for fear of flopping, damn it! Well, her good fortune the man she coveted was her husband, no doubt. Still…
Thoughts blurred.
“I believe we should retire.” He said on her skin as his mouth came to the top of her breast and his arm pulled her harder.
“I couldn’t agree more.” She muttered, in the end of her forces.
They walked with apparent calm to the manor and to his chamber.
In the middle of the night, a movement awoke her. She opened her eyes to see Conrad sitting by the fire, clad in his pyjamas.
“What happened?” She asked somnolently, stretching.
He turned his piercing eyes to her. His midnight wavy hair mussed, her fingers’ deed; his stubble darkened his jaw. He looked like a tall Celtic warrior. She wished he came back to bed to make her happy once more.
“I did not want to disturb you.” He raked his hair with his long tanned fingers. “Again.” He focused his steamy eyes on her, causing lightning sensation to flash through her.
Shameless, she let the counterpane fall a few inches from her shoulders and stared directly at him. “Come to bed.” She commanded.
“Aurelia.” His voice huskier, as his eyes perused her, tempted. “I need to let you rest!” Exasperation lay in the utterance.
The counterpane fell more inches, revealing the top of her breasts. “Stand up and come here.” She repeated.
Their eyes meshed in a long tacit dialogue, his trying for a desperate resistance and hers provoking.
In a daze, his legs moved, and he started to the bed, his comfortable trousers tented with his need.
“I rather find you becoming in these pyjamas.” She complimented him, teasing.
“You do?” He asked husky, eyes fixed on her.
“Yes. I especially like the way the under part… tents.” She lay down for his appreciation.
“You like… oh.” He reached the bed. “It is always in this condition in your presence.” He lay by her side.
“Good thing all I have to do is to untie it.” She said mimicking her words, revealing his hard craving for her.
He moaned at the same time as his mouth reached her sensitized breast.
The first lights found them cuddling, Aurelia on her side and Conrad behind her, holding her, his nose buried in her loose long rosewood hair. Her smell and her softness made him want to touch her incessantly. In the night, he awoke wanting her, guilty about it. She had to sleep to keep her energy. She used to be so active and diligent. But the want of her came strong and unavoidable. She responded so eagerly, her earthy willingness enthralling him, making him more attached to her.
She turned to him, her body skimming his, as he tried to skip the inferno of his desire. “Good morning.” He said when her rosewood eyes met his.
“Good morning.” She mumbled, her leg bridging over his
Oh dear!
“Slept well?” Distraction would get him through this.
“Splendidly. You?”
“Couldn’t be better.” He tightened his arms around her as she rested her head on his shoulder. They remained thus lengthy.
“Excuse me.” She said, getting up and dressing her new lacy negligée.
He glimpsed at her, observing she had acquired a rather ashen colour. Upright, she walked to her bedroom and closed the connecting door.
He had no qualms following her, worried with this change in her. In her dressing room, she sat with a chamber pot on her lap. She was sick and would not accept his help, damn her! He hurried to take a towel and moisten it. As the sickness subsided, he took the chamber-pot away and towelled her sweated brow; she breathed heavily. He did not care he was stark naked.
“Does this happen often?” He saw her sparsely during the day. Anything might befall her; it hit him, bringing him to a concerned state.
“Yes, at different times of day.” She answered candidly.
“Why don’t you tell me about it?” His pleated brow spoke of contrariety.
“I don’t want to worry you. It is normal in the first couple of months.” She held her negligee tight around her swollen, beautiful breasts.
“I have the right to know, Aurelia!” Knelt before her, he lifted his serious gaze to hers.
“I agree, but men overreact.” She shrugged.
“You cannot go on working as a yeoman!” He held her shoulders and made her face him.
“Of course I can. I am not sick!” Her expression stony.
“No, but you have to keep our child in mind.” He did not want to vent on the possibility of anything happening to her. A cold invisible hand squeezed his guts at this.
“The child is fine!” She stated firmly. “I eat well, sleep enough; the doctor says all is going as it should.”
He took her in his arms and placed her delicately back in his bed. Beside her, he saw her colour had gone normal anew.
“I will go about the estate’s affairs.” As he must have done since the news about their infant.
“No! You will not!” She said commandingly. “You agreed to let me manage it!”
He raked both his hands through his head, his bare chest flexing with the movement. “Yes, I did. Before your present condition.”
“It is not a ‘condition’!” Her angry voice came louder. “Women with child work until they are about to give birth!”
“Not you!” He devolved as angry. “I forbid you!” He regretted his words as soon as they left his mouth. Obedience not being one of her strengths.
“I will not receive orders from you!” She tried to put her feet on the carpet to leave the bed. He held her by her shoulders; she tried to break loose jerkily.
Forceful air escaping from his lungs, he held her gaze. “Look,” he tried to climb down. “I will go about the estate...”
“I don’t accept it!” She interrupted him and tried to break loose with more insistence.
“Let me finish!” He waited until she stopped hurtling. “Coleman can report to you in the end of each day.”
She eyed him attentively. “But I have decisions…”
“You will continue to make the decisions, as we agreed.” He insisted. “And the book-keeping.” He added. “I don’t own the skills for them, anyway!” He conceded. “You proved much batter at those than I.”
She relaxed a little against the headboard. “I will assent to this only until I give birth.”
“Naturally.” He confirmed.
“I cannot sit home doing nothing the whole day, I would go crazy!” She did not need to say such a thing; it showed plainly. “I will undertake lighter tasks.”
He would make sure said tasks were extremely light.
“Fine.” He nodded, satisfied with her compromise. “Now, tell me what needs to be overseen today. I’ll go do it.”
He considered their conversation a quite good middle way, he thought as he walked to his dressing room. He would undertake the burdens of his entailed lands as he must have done when his father passed away. She displayed a good skill for supervising and for the financial aspect of the estate. She had done utterly well so far; he wanted it to continue as she wished.
His valet met him and he prepared for a day’s work.
Chapter Thirteen
She was leaving the vegetable garden, a few days later, with a basket full of the first vegetables of the season when she sighted her brother-in-law coming in her direction.
While cutting off the vegetables, her mind raced. Her husband’s decree she abstain from heavy work for the whole of her term shook her to her core. The fear she would not be able to oversee the progress of the affairs, coupled with the terrifying notion he would use the assets to go back to his old ways tensed her. And readied her to struggle for what they had sig
ned soon when he arrived. In the end, she got calmer with his assurance he would not overtake everything, and their agreement would remain intact.
Maybe, it would be good for her to slow down a bit and prioritize the child she carried. To oversee everything was burdensome, no doubt. She enjoyed doing it which had given her a sense of purpose for the past years.
At this point, though, the help from her husband did not come unwelcome. Who knew he would not get involved with his heritage and learn to love it as she did? He had never given a damn to the lands that justified his own title; he never stayed there enough for that. Since he arrived, he had given attention to the routines and helped when necessary. She hoped he would not let anyone down anymore. The people who depended on the lands counted on her. She would make sure everything ran accordingly.
“Let me take this.” Bennett said, taking the basked from her.
“Thank you.” She replied with a smile.
“Not out and about today?” He inquired politely.
“I need to take it easy for a while.”
“Do you?” He dressed elegantly but not extravagant.
“I don’t know if my husband told you, but you have a nephew or niece on the way.” She lifted her dress to walk over a muddy patch. She dressed one of her practical old attires today.
He turned his head to her, surprised. “Truly?” Enthusiastically. “That’s exceedingly good news!”
“It is.” She turned her head to him to see his expression become thoughtful.
“You understand, first-borns always suffer a lot of pressure during their growing years.”
“Undoubtedly.” She agreed.
“It was no different with Conrad.” He paused for a few seconds; then continued. “As it happened to my father and his father before him.”
She wondered if it might have been the cause for his indifference to his duties. “It is the usual in noble families, I reckon.” She had no siblings and her father’s estate would go to his nephew after him.
“Certainly.” He agreed. “But different children take it in their own way. I believe Conrad wanted to experiment a bit of freedom before he was ready to undertake his responsibilities.”
“Perhaps he took it too far.” She replied soberly. “Or too long, for that matter.” Her eyes ran away to the horizon.
“Absolutely.” Bennett completed. “The consequence being people will take time to trust him, I realise.”
She turned her eyes abruptly to him, amazed at his sharpness. “Or never trust him at all.” She vented.
“Precisely.” They fell silent as they walked in the late morning sun, around them the landscape took on a deep green shade in the last weeks. “People make mistakes all the time. As a lawyer, I can assure you of this.”
“Nobody’s perfect, me included.” She conceded.
He nodded pensively. “Sometimes they deserve a second chance.”
“You are bound to defend him. He’s is your brother.” She exhaled emotions tamped inside her. “His past doesn’t recommend him, I am afraid.”
“I cannot differ with you there.” He admitted. “A second chance to him means a possible better outcome for you as well.”
She understood. Her husband with another chance would open to her an avenue to be happy with him. “Or a worse outcome.” She countered. “A risk I am not sure I want to take.”
“Your future is at stake. Yours and the little one’s on the way.” They reached the kitchen. “Dwell of that.” He handed cook the basket. His arm held out, he said. “May I accompany you into the manor?”
She took his arm, head full of thoughts.
“Tonight, is our farewell dinner.” He informed her. “I take my leave first light in the morning.”
“That is sad news indeed.” She lamented. “Your visit was very pleasant.”
“I am glad to hear that.” In the hall, he bowed to her. “If you excuse me, I have to prepare to depart.”
“Of course.” She curtsied, and he walked away.
“I believe we should visit your parents.” Conrad said next day at their now usually early breakfast.
He saw his brother off while she slept a while longer. She joined him in the morning room when she had got ready.
She lifted her eyes from the teacup. “Oh?” Surprised, it was all she could say.
“I have not seen them yet.” He folded the paper on the table. “And Doctor Morrison is in their manor. I would like to see if he made progress with your father.” He dressed informal clothes that would allow him more comfort during his day around the lands. He looked no less attractive for those, she mused as her eyes appreciated him.
She did not forecast how her parents would react to his presence. Her mother did not tire of pointing all Conrad’s flaws every time she visited them. “My mother sent news saying they work hard on it every day.”
“Yes.” His dark eyes found hers, sending a between-the-lines message which had nothing to do with their conversation. “Samuel has been keeping me informed.”
Awe overtook her. She did not count on him pursuing the state of his affairs with such attention. Mindfulness had never been his trait. “How considerate of him.” She commented simply.
“Perhaps we can visit this afternoon.” He insisted.
She would not be able to avoid their encounter even if she tried. He had been back for weeks. As many weeks she had not seen her parents, so busy she had been with her routine and him. Besides, she had yet to give them her latest news.
“I suppose so.” She agreed.
He left shortly after breakfast.
Her mind hammered what Bennett said before he departed. His piece of advice sounded definitely reasonable. Albeit her mind resisted his arguments and her heart outflanked it forceful. Fear stood in the forefront. Conrad never asked for a second chance, by the way. Which got her to conclude her frets useless at any rate.
The situation they lived in, however, proved to be an integrally grey zone. They accomplished his requirement to produce an heir. Still, they extended their… physical encounters, including the use of only one bed during the night. (She did not even want to think about what the servants’ gossip might be). He insisted he had changed his ways, but avoided talking about the future, if they envisioned one. He refused to go to London on the grounds he wanted to be present during her term. Would he leave for London after her confinement, she wondered? He would have no reason to stay, unless to “make” a spare, after the heir, counting on her child being a boy, that is. She did not conjecture what to expect. She tried to expect nothing, assured she would be disappointed.
At present, she undertook less to do and more time to muse. She did not regard it as positive since only one person exclusively lived in her mind. The realisation froze her. He monopolised her focus, whether they were positive or negative. He monopolised her… cravings, her expectations when night fell. And her delight in the morning cosiness. Goodness gracious! He would occupy every corner of her life if she did not take care. He never gave her attention during their marriage; she did not learn how to deal with it now. How could she stop it? She would not be able to avoid this situation until the end of her confinement. It lay months in the future!
The best to do was to take it as it came; or else she would go crazy! She left the morning room in search of her daily chores.
Conrad surveyed the landscape from his horse. He had never noticed the beauty of it. In full bloom, the shades of green mixed with the open sky. The work which had been filling his days made him acquire a feeling of accomplishment that the end-of-the-day tiredness endorsed. Meeting the people, working together, acknowledging their challenges and helping to overcome these gave him a sense of duty fulfilled he had never experienced in his life.
The work he did since he arrived made him feel good. At that moment, though, he kept track of everyday routines, what should be done, what started and finished. Contentment invaded him, with his labour, his lands, his inheritance. His life. Everything coloured b
y one person and one person only. His wife. Without her, life would taste like sand. She gave him purpose. Meaning. Soon she would give him their child, whom, he would make sure, loved their heritage.
He did not want the next generation to conjecture they had a dull obligation towards the title as his father had done. He wanted to transmit this… pleasure of the small daily blisses that made life whole.
“My lord.” Coleman awoke him from his reveries. “See there, the bull that went missing?”
“Yes, Coleman.” He looked at the direction the steward pointed.
“The lads are going to herd it back to our pastures.” He hesitated for a few seconds.
“What is it, Coleman?” Conrad encouraged.
“In cases like this, Lady Strafford likes to call in the veterinarian preventively.” He started. “The bull spent a week out of our sight. It could have taken a bug.”
Conrad nodded. Sensible Viscountess, he concluded proud. “Let’s do it, then.” He replied, seeing how important it was to protect the cattle from a plague.
Coleman bowed his head and rode to the ox.
As the carriage jolted through the country lane, Conrad and Aurelia sat in front of each other in silence. He returned to the manor to pick her up and the carriage to go to his in-laws. She looked more than beautiful today in a rosy day dress which illuminated her perfect skin. The design highlighted her full breasts, made fuller by her state. He turned his stare to the window for fear of having… ideas in the middle of a country lane. Which reminded him of the night they came back from the dance at the fair. Said night had ended very… deliciously.
The weather held since morning and a mild sun painted the green landscape with vivid colours.
He changed into black breeches, a white shirt and black riding coat to visit the in-laws he had met only a couple of times. He did not consider how they would receive him and, frankly, did not care much. What he cared most about was his wife’s opinion of him, of which he learned a great deal already. His attention drifted inside the carriage and encountered her eyes on him. She perused him with a certain… avidity he found difficult to ignore. He held her gaze, as they embarked on a surreptitious communication suffused with meaning, emotional and otherwise. If he continued staring at her, he might lose his sense of decency. So, he diverted his eyes.