by Andrew Grey
Chapter 4
RYAN woke to light peeking around the curtains and someone knocking on his hotel-room door. He got up and padded over. He was about to open it when he remembered what had happened the night before and that he wasn’t wearing anything. “Just a minute,” he said and hunted up a pair of jeans. He pulled them on and jumped a little to get the light denim on before fastening them and then opening the door.
“I’ve been waiting for you to call for hours,” Jacky said as he rushed into the room, then stopped to look at the bed. “Where is he?” Jacky turned toward the open bathroom door.
“He left in the middle of the night,” Ryan said.
“Was it a wham-bam?” Jacky snapped his hips and then burst into giggles, and Ryan rolled his eyes.
“No, it most certainly wasn’t,” Ryan said, trying not to sound offended. Regardless of whether he knew the men a long time or for just a few hours, Ryan was never a wham-bam kind of guy. He believed in taking his time and that the reward was more than worth it. It had been for him last night, and he hoped it was the same for Dante.
“So what happened?” Jacky asked excitedly as he sat on the end of the bed.
Ryan glanced at the clock and groaned. “It’s barely seven in the morning. I was sleeping until you decided to come pounding on my door.” Ryan wiped his eyes and picked up the phone, dialing room service. He asked for coffee, orange juice, and a croissant before hanging up again.
“You were with Dante Rivers last night, and I want all the dirt.” Jacky bounced on the mattress. “Did he fuck you? Did you fuck him?” Jacky shivered visibly.
“Look, I don’t kiss and tell and you know that. I’m not going to discuss what happened between Dante and me.” Ryan pushed open the top of his suitcase and pulled out a T-shirt. He tugged it on and pulled it down to cover his chest and stomach.
“But it’s Dante Rivers,” Jacky squealed, like a high school cheerleader who’d just been told another girl had been selected squad leader.
“No, Jacky,” Ryan said firmly and settled into the chair. “What about the cowboy you left with?” Deflection was the only recourse when Jacky got like this.
“He was okay. I mean, the guy was huge, but sometimes everything isn’t proportional. Not that I’m some big size queen or anything. It’s what you do with what you’ve got, and he could have been King Kong and he wouldn’t have known what to do with it.” Jacky shook his head. “I got him off and sent him on his way.” Jacky was obviously disappointed and some of the energy slipped out of him, momentarily. “So tell me about Dante.” He instantly began bouncing again. “Did you get an autograph? Did he sign your butt for you?” He burst into another fit of giggles, and Ryan was tempted to drop his pants just to demonstrate that his ass was indeed signature-free.
“No, I didn’t get his autograph,” Ryan said and waited for Jacky’s laughter to subside. Ryan didn’t need an autograph or any other keepsake to remember his night with Dante. For some reason, Ryan knew he’d remember last night for the rest of his life.
When Jacky’s laughter did subside, he looked like he kept expecting him to say something, but Ryan simply stared at Jacky. Slowly the other man’s expression became more serious, and eventually Jacky’s eyes widened and his mouth formed an “O.”
“Yeah, exactly,” Ryan said, turning to answer the door when he heard a soft knock. A waiter brought in a tray and set it on the desk. Ryan tipped him and said thanks, and the waiter left.
“But it was good, right?” Jacky asked, and Ryan nodded.
“Don’t ask for any details, because you aren’t going to get them,” Ryan said.
Jacky held up his hands in surrender. “The last thing I want to hear about is any of the kinky things you do,” he said.
Ryan knew he’d meant it as a joke, but it didn’t sound one bit funny to him. Ryan had picked up the coffeepot, but now he set it back on the tray with a bang. “Look, it wasn’t like that at all. And I’d appreciate it if you’d keep your ignorant opinions to yourself.” Ryan loomed over Jacky. “You know nothing, and acting flip isn’t helping. What happened was serious, and someone got hurt.”
“I know. But it wasn’t your fault,” Jacky said softly, all hints of mirth vanishing. “I was just teasing.”
“Well, it wasn’t funny,” Ryan said. He turned away and walked over to the curtains, pulling them open with a snap to let some sun into the room. “I honestly thought I’d left all that behind. That I’d learned my lesson.”
“There was no lesson to learn,” Jacky said.
“Yes, there was. Because of me… well, you know what happened, and we don’t need to go over it again.” Ryan pressed his eyes closed to block out the memories. To his surprise, what he saw instead was Dante laid out on the bed, squirming and writhing as Ryan slowly took the bull rider’s long, sweet cock down his throat. He’d wanted so badly to reach down and press his cock to Dante’s lips, but last night hadn’t been about him; it had been about Dante. That it had been one of the most erotic experiences of his life for Ryan as well had been a bonus.
“Have something to eat; you’ll feel better,” Jacky said, and Ryan slowly turned away from the window. He accepted the filled mug from Jacky and ate half the croissant before setting the rest aside. “I’m going to clean up and get packed. I’ll meet you in the lobby in forty-five minutes, and we’ll head for home.”
“I was…. Okay,” Jacky said, and Ryan went into the bathroom. He shaved, brushed his teeth, and took a quick shower. By the time he emerged from the bathroom, Jacky was gone. Ryan dressed and packed everything up. He checked the room for anything he’d left behind but found nothing. The bedding was strewn all over the floor, and Ryan picked it up, throwing it on the bed. Something chinked on the floor. As he walked around the bed, he caught a glint of silver. He reached down and pulled up a belt buckle with what had to be Dante’s belt still attached.
Ryan ran his thumb over the inscribed design of a bull’s head before curling the belt into a tight circle and tucking it into his bag. Then he gathered the last of his things and pulled open the door. He threw his carry bag over his arm and wheeled his suitcase into the hall. The hotel room door closed behind him, and he walked toward the elevator.
“Are you ready?” Jacky asked as he approached, just before the elevator door slid open. Ryan nodded. He was more than ready to go home.
THE ride home took a few hours. Jacky dropped him off, and Ryan said good-bye before carrying his stuff into the lobby of his condo building. He rode the elevator to the top floor, and once inside, collapsed in one of his leather living room chairs, looking out the window toward downtown Houston rising in the distance.
He didn’t move for the longest time. He was tired, and his mind kept running over the night before. He knew he needed to get Dante out of his mind, but he just couldn’t. His phone ringing finally broke Ryan out of his thoughts.
“Hey, how did your trip to the rodeo go?” Marie asked when he answered. They’d been friends and colleagues since he started at the brokerage house six years earlier.
“It was fine. Jacky and I had a good time. He, of course, was nuts most of the time, but I have to thank you for your help getting the tickets. They were the perfect birthday present for him.”
“You’re welcome, as always,” she said. She paused before saying, “Are you just tired, or has something got you down?” Marie could usually read him pretty well. “Look, if you’re just tired, go to bed, because your calendar is full tomorrow, like it is every Monday. But if it’s something else….” Marie paused again, and Ryan knew she was waiting for him to say something, but he wasn’t in the mood to talk. “Okay. But if you feel like talking, you know where I am. So how was the rodeo itself?”
“Really exciting,” Ryan said, brightening. “The whole thing came down to the very last ride, and the spread between first and second was two one-hundredths of a point. Dante had the ride of his life and he came up just shy. It was almost heartbreaking.” Ryan remembered the te
nsion in Dante’s body. He hadn’t realized exactly who Dante was until Jacky had introduced himself.
“Dante?” Marie was a huge rodeo fan. She’d been planning to go, but a family commitment had come up, so she’d sold him the tickets. “Do you mean Dante Rivers? Wow. He must have had one hell of a ride to come up that far in the standings.” He could hear papers rustling behind Marie.
“It was one wild ride,” Ryan said, and he’d never been so happy to be alone in his life, because right at the second, he wasn’t picturing Dante on the bull, but Dante on the bed, butt in the air, getting ridden for all he was worth.
“I didn’t think you were into rodeo much,” Marie said suspiciously.
Ryan swallowed. “Let’s just say that his technique caught my attention.”
Marie paused, and Ryan knew he’d gone too far. There was no way she was going to let that one go. “Just what type of technique are we talking about? Because I somehow doubt you’d know good bull-riding technique from bad.” Marie laughed. “So spill it.”
Ryan sighed. “Jacky took me to a bar after the rodeo, and I met Dante. We played pool, and he was flirty.” Ryan sighed softly. “You are to tell no one about this.”
“What, didn’t things go well? There have been rumors that he was gay for a while, so I doubt you’re going to out him or anything,” Marie said, and Ryan heard her sip from a glass.
“Things went well. Better than well. They were….” Ryan sighed again. “The thing is, when we were together, it….”
“Hot?” Marie asked.
“Yes, but more than that. I think I was able to really see what he needed and give it to him.” Ryan got up from his chair and wandered through the apartment before opening the liquor cabinet and pulling out a bottle of whiskey. Ryan got a glass and some ice and then poured some of the amber liquid into it. “Let’s just say we had an amazing time, but in the middle of the night he tried to sneak out.”
“Men!” Marie swore.
“I resent that,” Ryan said.
“I didn’t mean you, honey. What did you do?”
“Nothing. What could I do? He was scared,” Ryan explained.
Marie paused, and Ryan heard nothing for a long time. “I think you’re going to have to explain that to me,” Marie said.
Ryan’s breath caught in his throat. “I don’t know if I can, not over the phone.”
“Fine. I’ll see you in ten minutes. Should I bring a bottle of wine? Something stronger?” Marie asked.
“I have everything here,” Ryan said.
“All right. See you in a few.” She disconnected, and Ryan set the phone on the table beside the chair. Damn it, that woman had missed her calling. She should have been with the CIA instead of in investments. He hadn’t wanted to talk to anyone about what had happened between him and Dante, but Marie had wheedled just enough out of him that he was committed now. Granted, he knew Marie could keep a secret.
Ryan picked up his bags and carried them to his bedroom. He threw the dirty clothes in the laundry and put the few clean things back in their places in the drawers or on their hangers in his meticulously organized closet. Then he put the suitcase and carry bag away and closed the walk-in closet door. He was just leaving the bedroom when his bell sounded. He buzzed her in and went to open a bottle of wine. A soft knock sounded on his door as he placed a tray with glasses, wine, and a few crackers on the coffee table.
He opened the door, and Marie surged in like a force of nature, hugging him within an inch of his life before breezing past on her way toward the wine.
“So, you have me curious as hell,” Marie began as she poured two glasses of wine, then handed one to Ryan as he followed behind.
“I know, but this is hard and… are you sure you want to hear this?”
“Right. The last thing I want to hear about is two gorgeous men in bed together. Please.” She exaggerated her expression. “I haven’t had a date in six months that wasn’t some kind of cross between the Hunchback of Notre Dame and Hannibal Lecter. Every loser in town seems to have beaten a path to my door. So, please explain to me why after a night of mind-blowing sex, you think Dante Rivers, a man who rides bulls for a living, got scared.” She sounded dubious. “How could you scare him? You’re a pussycat.”
“Because of the way I made him feel,” Ryan said and took a sip from his glass before setting it back on the table. Marie seemed skeptical, but she kept quiet, holding her glass in her hands and waiting. “I don’t have to tell you this is private.” Ryan shifted in his chair. “When I met Dante in the bar, we flirted back and forth and it was nice. But….” Ryan reached for his glass again, figuring he might as well keep it close. “There was this feeling in the pit of my stomach, an excitement and flutter I haven’t felt in years. It’s hard to explain, but it was definitely there.”
“I don’t understand what that means,” Marie said.
“I know, and it’s hard to explain, but it meant that there was something Dante needed from me, something I could give him. I should have simply walked away, but the pull was too strong.”
“You’ve lost me,” Marie said, clearly intrigued, because her gaze never left Ryan for a second.
“It’s hard to describe to someone who doesn’t feel it, but in the bedroom, I’m the one in control, and what I felt from Dante was that he needed someone to be in control for a while.” Ryan gulped from his glass, waiting for Marie’s reaction. He expected surprise, horror, or maybe a snort of derision, but what he got were chuckles.
“I do understand.” Marie leaned closer. “You and I have more in common than we thought.” She took another sip from her glass, and it was Ryan’s turned to be surprised. “So were you able to give him what he needed?”
“Yes, and the thing is, I don’t think I’ve ever been as in tune with another human being like I was with him. I knew, deep down, what he needed.” Excitement filled Ryan that he could talk to someone he trusted.
“Were you able to push his limits?” Marie asked.
Ryan shook his head. “It wasn’t like that.” Ryan paused and thought how he was going to explain without going farther than he wanted to. “He didn’t need me to push his limits. What he needed was someone else to be in control. So I deprived him of some of his senses and allowed him to just feel with the others. It was sensual, hot, and incredibly erotic.” Ryan moved to the edge of his chair. “You know that moment when your partner becomes transcendent?”
Marie nodded and sipped from her glass. “It’s what we always want.”
“I know I had him there more than once. And how many times does that happen the first time you’re with someone?” Ryan asked, and Marie thought for a minute and then shrugged. “It’s rare, right?”
“Very,” Marie answered. “In books it comes off perfect the first time; in real life, almost never.”
“It was perfect, and I think that scared him.”
“If you didn’t hurt him and he had an experience to remember, why would it scare him? If anything, it should build trust.” Marie finished her wine and half filled her glass again.
“Because he’s a bull-riding cowboy who should always be strong and in control of everything,” Ryan said with a touch of sarcasm. “And his ego couldn’t stand having someone else in charge. Oh, he could take it and love it while I was driving him out of his mind, but once the lust, passion, and everything else that flew him to the moon were gone, he started to think, and fear took over.”
“They love it while you’re with them, and then they’re ashamed of you and themselves once it’s over,” Marie said as she nodded.
Ryan set his glass on the table and took the one from her hands as well, setting it next to his. Then he gently held her hands. “When he came, I could swear there were tears on his cheeks.” Ryan swallowed around the lump in his throat as he remembered wiping the wetness from Dante’s cheek with his thumb. “And I can’t stop thinking about him.”
Marie held his hand in her dainty ones. “If you want my opinion, y
ou need to sleep on it and get some distance. I mean, it isn’t likely that Dante is going to be calling or suddenly show up at your door, so you need to move on.”
“I know, and thanks,” Ryan said before kissing her cheek. Then he handed her back her glass and sat back in his chair. “So I have to know, should I be picturing you in leather with a whip?” Ryan grinned, and Marie leaned forward in her chair.
“Only if you want me to use it on you,” she said seriously. Ryan swallowed, and she burst into laughter. “I’m hardly so cliché.” Ryan laughed as well, and they sat together and finished their wine, shifting the conversation to other topics. Marie switched to juice because she was driving, and they talked for much of the evening. Once she left, Ryan cleaned up and then got ready for bed, hoping like hell he could put Dante Rivers out of his mind.
No such luck.
A COUPLE weeks later, Marie strode into Ryan’s office and closed the door. “Where were you?” she asked as she sank into one of his chairs. Instead of going it alone in a tough business, he and Marie had formed a team years earlier, and that team worked together to bring in new clients, manage their existing clients’ accounts, and provide portfolio and risk-management services. Ryan and Marie were the senior members of the team. “For the past two weeks, whenever we’re in a meeting and it slows down, you seem to take a trip somewhere.”