Andrea regarded him with affection. He was such a good child, he deserved the best.
He deserved two parents.
Andrea glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall. It was almost nine-thirty. She wondered when Mark would call.
“Mummy,” Terrence began.
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“Can Mark come with us to the zoo?”
“Oh.” Andrea frowned. “I don’t know if he can, but I can ask him.”
“Yay!” Terrence exclaimed.
“I didn’t say he could, Terrence. He’s very busy. But I’ll find out if he can.”
“Tell him I reeeeeaaaaalllly want him to go, okay?”
From the first time Terrence met Mark, it had been obvious that he was smitten with him. “Okay, I’ll tell him,” Andrea assured her son.
“Is he gonna be my daddy?”
Andrea nearly choked on a piece of toast. She quickly drank some juice. “Sweetheart, why would you ask me that?”
“Because I want him to be my daddy. I like him.”
Oh my God, what do I say now? Andrea struggled to find the right response. She finally settled on, “He’s our friend. He can visit us as often as we like. And maybe we can visit him.”
“But I want him to be my daddy.”
Andrea was saved by the sound of footsteps. She looked up to see both her parents heading into the kitchen. “Mom, Dad. Good morning.”
“Good morning.” Her father kissed the top of her head. “How’s your arm today?”
“It’s my neck that’s bothering me, because it’s hard for me to find a good position to sleep in.”
“Andrea,” her mother said. “Can you come here for a minute?”
Andrea got out of her seat. “I’m sorry. I already boiled the eggs, so they’re a little cold. You just have to heat them up—”
“That’s not why I called you over,” her mother said in a hushed voice.
Andrea looked at her in confusion. “I don’t understand.”
“How long have you and Mark been seeing each other again?” Gretta asked in a sing-song voice.
“Oh, Mom,” Andrea said dismissively.
“You had to know I’d have questions. We show up and there he is at the hospital, the one who found you. Imagine our surprise.”
“You think because he’s the one who found me that means we’ve been secretly involved?”
“Have you?”
“No,” Andrea said in a tone that she hoped her mother would take to mean the conversation was over.
Gretta shot Andrea a curious look. “But he was in Buffalo. He found you and saved your life.”
“You know the whole story, Mom. It was a miracle.”
Andrea opened the microwave door and put the boiled eggs inside.
Gretta frowned playfully at her. “You won’t tell me anything?”
“The truth, Mom, is that there’s nothing to tell. You know everything.” Andrea shrugged. “Maybe it was fate. I did see him before the accident. He came into the restaurant and was seated at my table. Imagine my shock.”
“And…?”
“And nothing. The next thing I know, I’m hearing he saved my life.”
Gretta placed her hand on Andrea’s. “You still love him, don’t you?”
Andrea knew she did, but how did her mother know? “We’re getting to know each other again.”
“I saw the way he looked at you at the hospital. And then at the dinner. I also saw how you looked at him.”
Andrea couldn’t help smiling as she took the eggs from the microwave. “I can’t keep much from you, can I?”
“Do you think it bothers me now, the fact that you still care for each other?”
“Does it?” Andrea reached for the bread. “When we saw each other again, he asked if we could meet for coffee or something. I told him, no. I had no plans of pursuing anything with him again. But now, after the accident…”
“You realize that life is short.”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“I’m sorry I kept you both apart. Mark is a fine young man.”
“He’s the same person he was ten years ago. Is he good enough now because he has his own business?”
“No, that’s not it at all. Despite what you think, I want you to be happy. If Mark makes you happy, then you should be with him.”
“We’ll see,” Andrea said.
She buttered the toast and put it on a plate, thinking that was the end of it. But then her mother said, “I heard what Terrence was asking you, about Mark being his daddy.”
Andrea threw a glance in Terrence’s direction. He was engrossed in conversation with his grandfather, a smile on his face. “I know, Mom. I’m not sure what to tell him. He just likes Mark so much…”
“It’s natural. The boy does need a father.”
What was her mother saying? “And you think Mark can fit the bill?”
“Well…it’s something you need to consider. If you don’t think Mark would be a good father to him—”
“Actually, if things worked out between us, I do think he would be a good father.”
Gretta smiled. “So do I.”
“What exactly are you saying, Mom?”
“We leave tomorrow, but I didn’t want to go before I had this talk with you. It’s obvious you and Mark still care for each other. And I say go for it. Now that you’ve found him again, don’t ever let him go.”
Don’t ever let him go.
Gretta’s words sounded in Andrea’s mind as she walked with Terrence and Mark at the Buffalo zoo. He had graciously agreed to accompany them because he didn’t have to be on a plane until late afternoon.
“Wow, look at those zebras,” Mark said with excitement.
“I like all their stripes,” Terrence said.
“They’re beautiful creatures, aren’t they?”
“Uh-huh,” Terrence agreed, nodding his head vigorously.
The three of them headed past the zebras and strolled toward the elephants.
“Now that’s an animal I love,” Mark said. “The elephant. It’s so big, no one can mess with it. Yet, it’s a gentle creature.”
Terrence looked up at Mark, and Andrea could see a question in his eyes. He asked, “Are you gonna be my daddy? Is that why you saved my mummy?”
Mark’s eyes widened in shock. He looked at Andrea, who shrugged helplessly at him.
“Terrence,” Andrea said. “Remember we talked about this.”
“I know…”
Lowering himself to Terrence’s level, Mark looked him dead in the eye. “Is that what you want?”
“I think so.” He pouted. “I have a daddy, but he never comes to see me. So I wanna new one, and you’re really nice.”
Mark didn’t quite know what to say. He rubbed his hand over the top of Terrence’s head. “I know I couldn’t ask for a better son than you.”
Terrence’s grin melted Mark’s heart. He meant what he said. Terrence was a special little boy, the kind any man would be proud to call his son. Mark wrapped him in a hug.
“Oh, look,” Mark suddenly said. “There are the giraffes.”
Terrence whipped his head in the direction where Mark pointed. His eyes lit up with excitement, he sprinted off in that direction.
“Terrence,” Andrea called. “Don’t go too far ahead of us.” As Terrence slowed to a walk, Andrea looked at Mark and said, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know he would ask you that.”
“It’s all right.”
“I hope you don’t feel too awkward. He’s at the age now when he’s realizing that he doesn’t have a father. I…I’m sorry.”
“There’s no need to apologize, really.”
“Come on!” Terrence called.
“Okay, okay. We’re coming.” Mark took Andrea’s hand.
“Wait,” Andrea said.
Mark looked at her. “Hmm?”
“I…I love you.” There, she said it. And the world didn’t end. “You don’t have to say it back.
I just want you to know how I feel, that I’m glad we found each other again, and I hope we make things work this time.”
“Mummy!” Terrence called.
“All right, sweetheart. We’re coming.”
Before Mark could say anything, Andrea, still holding his hand, hustled toward Terrence. Terrence immediately pushed himself between them and reached for their joined hands. With Mark and Andrea’s hands secured in his, Terrence looked up at them both and smiled.
It was the kind of smile Andrea had seen before—on other kids. Kids with two parents, walking together in the mall or the park.
Or the zoo.
Lord, Andrea hoped Terrence would get his wish. That things worked out with Mark, and he became her son’s new father.
Chapter 11
A week later, Andrea could hardly concentrate on her paper for thinking about Mark and the fact that he was arriving later that day. Somehow, she got her assignment done and she could only pray that it was decent.
“Earth to Andrea.” Allison snapped her fingers in front of Andrea’s face.
“Oh, sorry. What did you say?”
“Girl, never mind. You’re way up in the clouds.”
Allison was at Andrea’s place to pick up her assignment and take it to class for her. “I appreciate this,” Andrea told her. “Make sure it gets there in one piece,” she added with a smile.
“Have I ever let you down?” Allison asked.
“No.” Andrea hugged her. “Never. That’s why I love you, girl.”
As they pulled apart, a smile danced on Allison’s lips. “What time is Mark getting in?”
Andrea glanced at the clock in her foyer. “His flight arrives a little after four.” A week ago, it seemed this day would never come. Yet here it was. “I can’t believe I get him for the whole weekend.”
Allison’s eyes lit up. “Woo hoo. It’s about time you got lucky!”
“Allison!” Andrea bopped her on the arm. “He’s staying at a hotel.”
“Hey, if you need me to watch Terrence for the night—”
“Okay, enough. Don’t you have to turn our papers in?”
“All right, I’m gonna head out. But make sure you give me every detail on Monday.”
Andrea chuckled. “You know I will.”
“And I was serious about watching Terrence—”
Andrea started to push her friend out the door.
“All right, all right,” Allison protested. “Enjoy yourself, whatever you do.”
“Thank you,” Andrea said in a sing-song voice.
When Allison left, Andrea walked into her living room, looking around for any loose ends she’d missed. The place was neat and tidy, and vanilla-scented candles gave the room an enticing smell. Everything was in order—so why did she still feel on edge?
Andrea knew why. She had told Mark that she loved him, and since that time, he hadn’t said a word about it.
Yes, she’d made sure to tell him that he didn’t have to say the same thing to her. But now she couldn’t help feeling doubt about what he felt for her. Their talks had been nice, and Mark obviously still wanted to see her. But Andrea couldn’t help feeling like she had put herself out there and didn’t know if she was going to get her heart broken.
The way you broke Mark’s heart…
The thought made Andrea uneasy. Mark wouldn’t string her along, just to hurt her the way she had hurt him. Would he?
“Good grief, you’re being paranoid,” she said as she marched into her kitchen for some juice.
She had waited ten years to be reunited with her soul mate. She could certainly wait a bit longer.
Much later, Andrea didn’t feel much better.
Terrence was with his sitter, and she and Mark were once again at Amoré.
They’d had another wonderful dinner, and to look at them, one would think they were a happy couple. Even their waitress had gushed over them, treating them like they were newlyweds or a young couple in love. Mark had been nothing but pleasant to her, and polite as always, but something seemed off to Andrea.
“So, it’s been a crazy few weeks,” Mark was saying. “But I’ll get a bit of a break, which I’m definitely looking forward to.”
When he finished speaking, Andrea lowered her cup of coffee and looked him dead in the eye. “Mark, is something wrong?”
“At work?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s work. Maybe it’s something else. But I get the feeling something is up.”
He glanced down at the dessert menu. “Like I said, it’s been a crazy few weeks. But other than that, everything’s fine.”
Why wouldn’t he look at her when he answered the question? Andrea’s stomach knotted with worry. “Are you sure?” she asked again.
“Mmm hmm. Yeah, I’m sure.” After a beat, he asked, “Do you know what you’re going to have?”
Andrea glanced at her menu. “I was thinking of the pineapple sorbet. There’s a place in Chicago where they serve it, and it’s to die for.”
“Maybe I’ll try that, too.”
When Mark put his menu to the side of the table, Andrea reached for his hand. “Christmas is six days away, Mark. Do you know yet if you’ll spend it with us?”
He sighed, a weary sound, and still wouldn’t look directly at her. “I don’t know.”
Pain wrapped its fingers around Andrea’s heart and squeezed hard. “Mark, please. If something is wrong, tell me. If I did something, said something—”
“All right.” He finally met her gaze head-on. “I have had a lot on my mind.”
“About?”
“About…about us.”
Andrea swallowed. “What about us?”
Mark shook his head. “I don’t know. I’m not sure if this is…right.”
Exactly what was he saying? “Don’t know if what is right?”
“Andrea…”
“No, tell me,” she insisted. “What isn’t right?”
“Fine.” He looked away uncomfortably before meeting her gaze again. “You and me.”
Andrea’s stomach lurched painfully as she stared at Mark in shock. She didn’t quite know what to say.
“Maybe our time has passed,” he continued. “Maybe we’re not supposed to be doing this again.”
He couldn’t mean what he was saying. She had seen how he looked at her. Her mother had seen it, too. There was still something between them.
She couldn’t be so wrong.
“Mark, where is this coming from?”
“Am I really the only one who’s questioning anything?” he asked her. “Doesn’t this feel forced to you?”
“No,” she told him, fighting sudden tears. “It doesn’t.”
“We met again by chance. You didn’t even want to get together with me for coffee, and suddenly…” Mark’s voice trailed off.
Andrea leaned across the table. “And suddenly I got knocked over the head, right? Well, yeah, I did. And maybe that’s what I needed because I finally see the light.”
Mark’s expression said he wasn’t convinced. “This is all so fast.”
“Wait,” Andrea said, a horrible thought coming to her. “Is this because I told you I loved you? My God, please don’t tell me you’re like every other guy out there who freaks out at the mention of commitment.”
“You’ve got a son. He’s growing attached to me. He wants a father. He deserves one. But I don’t want to hurt him by continuing things if this is just…”
“Just what?”
Mark hesitated. “Just two people who used to be in love, trying to recapture something they once had.”
His words left Andrea cold. “How can you say that?”
“What if we hadn’t met again? Would you be feeling anything for me?”
“Don’t you think we met again for a reason?” Andrea asked him pointedly. “Call it fate, call it destiny—”
“Did you ever think of me?” Mark asked, cutting her off. “Think of me and wish that we had been together?
Did you ever consider me the love of your life?”
“And if I didn’t think of you every day, that changes how I feel now?”
“I guess that answers my question.”
“No, it doesn’t.” Andrea stared at him, wondering exactly what he was afraid of. “Because I did think of you. A lot. Maybe not every day, but I certainly never forgot you. You think I never wondered what could have been if I hadn’t been swayed by my parents?”
“What about Terrence’s father? You wanted to marry him.”
Andrea drew in a deep breath and released it slowly. “Life goes on, even if we don’t want it to. When I was involved with him, I never thought I’d see you again.”
“Or maybe you never thought I’d have enough money for you.”
Andrea gaped at him. “You know I never cared about your family background, how much money you did or didn’t have.”
“No, but your family did. It just feels wrong, them accepting me all of a sudden. Like it’s not real. I’m the same person I was ten years ago.”
“My parents have learned some hard lessons in life. They’ve been humbled. They like you for you. How can you not know that after the dinner?”
Mark didn’t answer.
“Fine—question them all you want. I guess I can’t blame you. But there’s no need to question me. You were the first man I ever loved.”
“You were the only woman I ever loved.”
His statement hung in the air between them. Andrea wasn’t sure what she was supposed to say. He seemed to be saying that because she had loved someone else, that had ruined what could be between them. Whatever she said now, she knew it would be wrong.
Mark looked around impatiently. “I’m not in the mood for dessert anymore.”
“We don’t have to have dessert. We can call it a night and talk tomorrow. I think a good night’s sleep will do us both some good.”
“Actually…I think I should head home in the morning.”
Panic filled Andrea. “You’re leaving?”
Mark didn’t answer.
“Are you going to come back?”
Mark didn’t look at her. “Maybe I shouldn’t.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“I’ve got all kinds of thoughts going through my head. I don’t know. I just need some time,” Mark told her.
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