by Ann Herrick
Matt stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I only want what's best for the yearbook."
"Me, too." I gulped down a trace of guilt as I said it.
CHAPTER 8
Anna met me at school after the yearbook meeting. Her father had let her borrow his prized Volkswagen Bug in order to pick up Stuart. The train didn't stop in Kenilworth, so we had to drive to the New Haven Station to pick him up. He was due in at five-fifteen.
I wondered now why Anna had asked me to go with her. She and Stuart couldn't talk privately with me around. Surely he had something special to say to her to make a trip home before vacation.
I wondered, too, why I had agreed to go. I guess I wasn't thinking straight when I was temporarily blinded by love, or whatever it was I'd thought I'd felt for Matt. Now I was going to feel like a fifth wheel. Seeing Anna and Stuart together and happy would only make me feel depressed.
"So," Anna said. "How's it going with the yearbook these days?"
I hesitated, then said, "I guess it's going okay, except for Matt. With everyone else I've managed to stay calm and not act like a dictator, although that always seems to be my first instinct. But, somehow, with Matt I do get...high-handed. It seems to be the only way I can deal with him."
"Hmmm." Anna tapped the steering wheel. "Maybe that's because deep down you know he's right about the Who's Who."
"I've explained why I want to cut the Who's Who," I snapped. "It's childish, it labels..."
"Hold it," said Anna. "I've figured out why you're against it. You're afraid you'll be chosen as half of an 'Adorable Couple.' You think your parents are 'haunted' by it, and you don't want to follow in their footsteps."
I didn't say anything.
So Anna continued. "You pull rank on Matt because you know your arguments aren't valid. You know that you're the one who's being selfish, not him."
"It's my decision, if I want to make it. It's the principle of the..."
"Ha! You're just being stubborn."
"I'm not stubborn!" I shot back. "I'm...I'm resolute."
We'd reached the turnpike exit for New Haven. Anna pulled off, then headed south toward the railroad station. "Well, I think you should think about it. Consider your credibility."
"Humph." I turned and stared out the window. If anyone other than Anna had said those things to me I'd probably explode. Not that I wasn't pretty upset. But Anna and I had been friends for too long for me to not realize she had my best interests at heart--even if I didn't agree with her. I was glad we'd reached the city, and she let the subject drop. Maybe seeing Stuart would make her forget about the entire Who's Who business, and I would be spared any more lectures.
We arrived just as Stuart's train pulled into the station. Anna wrung her hands as we watched the passengers getting off and heading our way on the platform. She must have been excited at the prospect of seeing Stuart.
Within a couple of minutes everyone had gotten off and the train had pulled out of the station. But no Stuart. Then, at the same time, Anna and I noticed a guy with a red beard standing on the other side of the track, holding a green duffel bag.
"It's Stuart," Anna said in a voice choked with emotion.
I never would have recognized him with the beard, but, sure enough, he smiled and waved. Next thing I knew he was giving Anna a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. It seemed like a low-key greeting to me. But then I guess he wasn't going to demonstrate his passion for her with me standing right there.
Stuart didn't say much on the way home and when he did he sounded tired. The train ride probably did him in.
That night I conjured up all sorts of scenes depicting Stuart proposing to Anna. He would take her to a fancy restaurant and she'd find an engagement ring in her shrimp cocktail. Or he'd drive her to the Mill Pond and, with moonlight sparkling on the water, he'd slip a ring on her finger. Or maybe he'd be really old-fashioned and get down on one knee.
Such romantic thoughts distracted me from my own misery of my relationship, or lack thereof, with Matt. The next morning I could hardly wait to call Anna and find out exactly what happened. It was probably even better than anything I'd imagined.
Finally, at ten o'clock, I couldn't wait any longer. I called. "Hi, Anna. It's me."
"Oh Laurel. I'm so glad it's you. I need to talk. Can I come over?"
"Sure!" She wanted to see me in person. She wanted to show me her ring! Well, I wouldn't spoil the surprise by guessing ahead of time. "Come on over."
In a couple minutes Iris called up the stairs. "Anna's here."
I practiced one more surprised look in the mirror, then opened the door for Anna.
"Hi," I said, trying not to sound too excited. "What'd you and Stuart do last night?"
Anna slumped onto my bed, her head bowed. She covered her face with her hands.
For a second I thought she was joking around. Then I heard her muffled sob. I put my arms around her. "Anna, what's wrong? What happened?"
"Oh, Laurel!" Anna looked up at me with reddened eyes. "Stuart broke up with me."
First thing, I checked for his fraternity pin. It was gone. I'd always thought Anna and Stuart were indestructible, like bricks and mortar. I felt helpless. I hardly knew what to say. "I-I'm so sorry."
"I couldn't believe it. At first...at first I thought he'd at least suggest that we date other people, but still see each other." Anna wiped a tear from her cheek. "But he broke it off completely. He-he's been dating another girl."
"Stuart's been seeing someone else?" My illusions were seriously shattered.
Anna nodded. "You know what's funny?" She sniffled. "Here my heart is breaking, but all I can think is, 'how could he do this to me just before the Homecoming Dance?' All I can picture is me, senior class president, going alone to a stupid dance that won't even matter in the long run! I'm a fool for worrying about something so unimportant."
"It's not unimportant." I pounded the mattress. "Not if it matters to you. If Stuart's been seeing someone else, he should have told you before now. It wasn't fair. You could have been dating all this time too. Guys!" I was thinking of Matt now. I pounded the pillow. "They're…they're impossible!" That didn't seem like an awful enough word, but it was all I could think of on short notice.
Anna let out a half-laugh, half-sniffle. "I've never seen you so worked up."
"Well, I can't stand to see you hurt."
"You know," Anna said, giving me a little hug. "With a friend like you to help me through it, maybe it won't hurt so much."
"Look," I said, patting her hand. "As of now we both needs dates for the Homecoming Dance. I don't want to go alone either, especially since my parents are going. What we need to do is round up a couple of guys. They don't have to be the loves of our lives."
Anna thought for a minute. "You're right. There must be a couple of guys who are just as anxious as we are to have dates for the dance without making a permanent commitment out of it."
"Definitely." I didn't want to discourage Anna by saying how hard it might be with the dance only a couple weeks away, since I'd brought up the idea in the first place.
"It'll be kind of weird after not worrying about dates for the past two years." The corners of Anna's mouth twitched. "But it might be fun. Remember the 'manhunts' we used to go on in junior high?"
"Oh, yeah..." I rolled my eyes. "Lurking around the boys' locker room, hanging around during baseball practice, walking back and forth in front of Jimmy Nelson's house fifteen times a day! What were we thinking?"
"I don't know." Anna stifled a giggle. "I don't think I'll resort to those tactics."
"We can be more subtle than that." I couldn't keep from laughing. It was good to see Anna acting silly.
"Oh." Anna sighed. "I'm glad I came over to see you. I feel better already."
"Good," I said. "Hey, let's get out and do something today. We can think about guys tomorrow."
"It's a nice day to be outside," said Anna. "Let's go for a walk."
"Good idea."
We bumped into Iris in the hall. A feeling of female camaraderie swept through me. "Iris, we're going for a walk. We'll probably head downtown. Want to come?"
"Me?" Iris blinked. "Sure!"
Though there was a definite chill in the air, the sun was bright and the walk was invigorating. Soon our cheeks were glowing pink. We didn't say much. We just enjoyed the lift we got from fresh air and sunshine.
We did go downtown and poked around in the drug store and Mario's Department Store. Then we were about to cross Main Street, when Iris started to step out in front of an oncoming car.
I grabbed her and pulled her back to the curb. "Iris!" My heart pounded. "That was close. Why did you step out in traffic like that?"
Iris was shaking. "The-the sign said 'Walk,' didn't it?"
"No," said Anna. "It said 'Don't Walk.'"
"That's right," I said. "Couldn't you see--" Suddenly it hit me. The spilled milk. The dropped forks. Bumping into things and misreading her math homework. "That's it, isn't it? You're having trouble seeing."
"No. Not really. Well...sort of." Iris stared down at the sidewalk.
"Why didn't you say something?" I exclaimed. "You probably just need glasses."
Iris didn't say anything.
"Oh. You don't want to wear glasses."
"It'd be terrible," Iris wailed. "With glasses I wouldn't be...I wouldn't look..."
"You'd still be your same adorable self," Anna tried to assure her.
"Oh. Right. Sure." Iris wrinkled her nose. "How many models wear glasses? How many actresses?"
I could see talking wasn't going to convince Iris of anything. "Look," I said. "We're only a couple blocks from Bright Eyewear. Let's go in and you can try on frames. Just for fun. Just to see how you'd look."
"Come on," said Anna. "We can all try on frames. There are tons of styles. It'd be like trying on sunglasses."
"Let's do it," I said. "After all, some of the most popular girls at school wear glasses."
"Well..." Iris hesitated. "If you both promise to try them on too."
"Promise," said Anna.
"Cross my heart."
"Oh, all right," said Iris. She didn't look too enthusiastic.
We ended up half dragging her into Bright Eyewear and nudging her over toward the frames.
"May I help you?" the receptionist asked.
"We're just looking," Anna said.
The receptionist nodded and left us alone.
Iris fingered a couple of frames, but wouldn't try any on. So Anna and I started trying some. I slipped on a pair of large, round purple frames and modeled them for Iris.
"How about these?" Anna asked. She had on a small rectangle tortoiseshell frame. "Think they'd impress them in admissions at Brown University?"
"I'd accept you," I said.
Eventually our fooling around enticed Iris to start trying on some frames. After a couple minutes she really got into it. "What about these?" she asked. "Do you like these?"
Then she tried on a pair of electric-blue frames that just seemed to suit her.
"Those look great," I said.
"Mmmm. I don't know." Iris wrinkled her nose.
"You look scholarly," said Anna, no doubt thinking that was a sure-fire compliment.
"Hi, Iris." The voice took me by surprise. It was Matt. "Those glasses look great on you."
"They-they do?" Iris stammered.
"Yes." Matt came over for a better look. "They give your face a certain...mystery."
"Really?" Iris checked herself in the mirror. She tilted her head to one side.
"They give you a 'woman-of-the-world' look," said Matt.
Iris gave the mirror a sultry glance. "You know," she said, "if I really need glasses, I think I would like a pair like this."
"They are nice," I said.
"I like them too," Anna said. "But just for fun, let's look at those over there with all the rhinestones." She took Iris by the arm and practically dragged her across the room.
Anna probably meant well by giving me a moment alone with Matt. But I didn't know what to say to him. After a bit, I finally said, "Um. Thanks. I think you told Iris just what she needed to hear."
"Don't give me too much credit for originality." Matt grinned. "It's what my father told my sister when she needed glasses. Funny thing is, though, it's true. Glasses do seem to give Iris a mysterious look."
I nodded. I wondered why Matt was being nice. There'd been no reason for him to convince Iris the glasses looked good on her. Unless, of course, it was just another subtle way of trying to get on my good side so he could change my mind about the Who's Who. I was tongue-tied and confused. If only I could read Matt's mind.
"Well..." Matt ran his finger along the edge of the mirror. "Guess this time next week we'll be in the middle of our Senior Class Day downtown."
"I can't wait," I said, a bit too eagerly. What was wrong with me? My resolve to be cool toward Matt was weakening.
"Same here," said Matt.
"Excuse me." The receptionist seemed to be addressing Matt. "Are you here to pick up the glasses that Mr. Stannard left to be repaired?"
"Yes." Matt excused himself with a nod and walked over to the receptionist's desk. As he was writing out a check, Anna and Iris came back.
"I have to be home soon," said Iris. "I'm supposed to baby-sit for Mrs. Wagner in a while."
"All right," I said reluctantly. Matt was still busy at the desk. I'd half hoped if we hung around he might offer us a ride home. I would have been tempted to accept. Maybe ignoring Matt wasn't the best policy. How could I figure him out if I didn't spend any time with him? But then, so often he was with Janie. It probably didn't matter now how he'd really felt about me. Any change of heart on my part would probably be too late.
On the way home the wind picked up. Iris complained about being cold. Then, "Look!" she shouted. "Snow!"
"It's only flurries," said Anna.
"But so early in November," said Iris. "Maybe it'll snow all weekend and we won't have school on Monday! What do you think, Laurel?"
"Hmmm?"
"The snow," said Iris. "Do you think we'll get much snow?"
I looked up at the fluffy flakes drifting down toward me. Until then, I'd hardly noticed the cold. My thoughts had been focused on private memories of Matt. "I don't know. Probably not."
"Well, I hope we do get lots of snow." Iris caught a flake on her tongue. "It would be fun!"
Snow. No snow. It didn't matter much to me. Right then I felt empty.
In front of my house, Anna drew me over and whispered, "Guys. Monday."
I hoped my enthusiasm would return by then.
That evening I made sure Iris talked to Mom and Dad about possibly needing glasses. At least something positive had happened that day.
By lunch time Monday Anna greeted me with what appeared to be a smile of success. Could she possibly have gotten a date for the Homecoming Dance already? I'd been too distracted thinking about Matt, wondering if I'd been too hasty in my judgment of him, to even contemplate the effort.
Anna set her lunch tray on the table and sat down. She wasn't one to hesitate about anything "Guess who asked me to the Homecoming Dance?"
I thought for a couple of seconds. "I give up. Who?"
"Jimmy Nelson! Can you believe it?"
"Good job. You work fast."
"I didn't do anything," Anna said. "We'd just sat down at the lab bench to start working on our titrations in chemistry, and he noticed right away that I wasn't wearing Stuart's fraternity pin."
"Sounds as if he's been waiting for this!"
"I can hardly believe it." Anna lowered her voice. "He told me he used to see me walking in front of his house all the time when we were in junior high. But he was too shy then to know what to say or do. By the time he got enough confidence to ask girls out I was already going with Stuart."
"He told you all this?"
"Yes." Anna's dark eyes brimmed with tenderness. "He said he'd better catch me before I got
another steady boyfriend. That's when he asked me to the dance."
"I take it you said yes."
"He was so sweet. How could I say no?" Anna lowered her thick black lashes. "I really want to go out with him. I know I'll need time to get over Stuart, but I think seeing Jimmy will help. A lot."
"I'm happy for you."
"What about you?" Anna grinned mischievously. "What's the progress report on your front?"
I thought about telling Anna the truth, that I couldn't concentrate on anyone but Matt, that he invaded my thoughts in spite of the fact that I did try to not think about him. But I didn't want Anna worrying about me. "Oh," I said. "I think I have a couple of promising prospects."
"Good! We'll have a great time at the dance."
"Um...yes." I tried to swallow my doubt. "I guess so."
CHAPTER 9
The rest of that week I made a couple feeble attempts to find a date for the Homecoming Dance, but my heart wasn't in it. Even my parents' exuberance didn't pique my interest.
"Semi-formal," Dad was saying one night. "Rose, what exactly is semi-formal?"
"Your blue suit will do nicely, Bud," said Mom. She held up the knee-length dusty- rose chiffon dress she planned to wear, and swirled around the room. She spotted me watching her. "Laurel." She smiled tentatively. "Have you decided what to wear yet?"
She hadn't asked me if I was going. I wasn't sure if she assumed I was or merely hoped I was. I still had a little over a week to get a date--if I ever got around to really trying. So I went along with her tiptoe-around-the-subject approach. "I don't know, Mom. I've got that yellow dress, but I might want to look at new ones. I've got time to think about it."
"Of course," Mom said, tactfully dropping the subject. "Tell me, do you think my thighs look slimmer? I've been doing leg lifts for weeks." She stuck out her jean-clad leg.
"Mom, your legs look terrific," I assured her. "Besides, who's going to see them unless you trade in that dress for a bathing suit?"
"You're right." Mom laughed. "I don't know what I'm worrying about. This is just a friendly reunion, not a contest."
"Right!" Maybe she and Dad were coming to their senses. I knew I should do the same and forget about Matt and find some nice guy to go to the dance with me. Well, I still had time. I could worry about it another day.