“You never hit her mother, did you?” I asked quietly.
“No,” said Jackson. “But there are other ways to hurt people.” I glanced away. “I wanted to be a success. I had tried being an actor and then a musician. Night and day, all I thought about was making it big. When my wife and I closed the little theater that I told you about, I went on the road. I was gone for months at a time.”
“You were working hard to make money,” I piped up.
He shook his head. “I didn’t write or even call much, Haley. I even forgot Brielle’s birthday.”
“My father never remembers my birthday,” I said.
He stroked my head. “There’s no excuse for that, not from anybody. I don’t know where my mind was,” he explained. “I had a great partner in my wife. I had a sweet little girl. They were the ones who left for California, but for Brielle, it was always as if I were the one who left.”
“But you didn’t leave them,” I insisted. “You were working.”
“It was more than that,” he said firmly. “Brielle and her mother needed me, and I just couldn’t be there. I didn’t love them enough, Haley.”
I gazed into his eyes. They were filled with tears.
“Your students like you a lot,” I reminded him.
He chuckled ironically. “I guess I’m not a bad teacher. But I’m older now. I’m more patient. And I never go out on the road,” he added, glancing around the yard. “So, maybe I’ve learned my lesson. But it’s a little too late for me with Brielle.”
“Maybe someday Brielle will forgive you.”
He smiled. “Thanks, Haley. What would I do without you?”
“You’re the perfect father for me,” I pronounced.
His eyes sparkled. “You’re perfect for me, too,” he said.
“Don’t get me wrong,” I said hastily. “I know you can’t be my dad. But you’ve done so much for me. I appreciate it, that’s all.”
“I’m your friend. That’s what friends are for.”
“I just wanted to say thanks, that’s all.” I glanced away shyly.
He patted my hand. “Okay, Friend, so now that we’ve had our cry, what shall we do?”
“Have a barbecue?”
“Not today,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m just not up for it.”
“I bought an awful lot of food,” I reminded him. “I hope it doesn’t go to waste.”
Jackson sat down on the hammock. “Maybe we can have it tomorrow.”
“Have what? The food or the barbecue?”
“Both,” he said.
“Who would we invite?” I asked.
“How about some of your friends?” he suggested.
“I would like to see my friend Nirvana again,” I said with excitement. “She could bring her boyfriend, Dill. He knows how to cook hamburgers. He works in a restaurant.”
“Let’s call them up,” Jackson agreed.
“I really think I should invite Yvonne and Maria, too,” I added. “They’d like the hammock.”
“Angela would probably want to come along with them,” Jackson suggested.
“Or Rayelle, if she’s working tomorrow afternoon. Terry must come, too.”
“We certainly have enough food,” Jackson assured me. He stood up and rested his elbow on one of the stone people. “We mustn’t forget Mrs. Brown.”
“She won’t come. Her legs are always hurting her. Or at least she says that they are.”
“Why don’t you invite her anyway?” said Jackson.
“Can we also invite your students Shari and Win?” I asked.
“Sure, why not? We’ll have a great big party.” He tapped my nose. “A great big party, just for you!”
“Why?” I asked in bewilderment. “It isn’t my birthday.”
“When is your birthday?” he asked, strolling through the yard.
“Actually, it was the day I came and sat on your steps and heard you playing the piano,” I said, thinking back. “It was the day that we met.”
“That recent?” he exclaimed. “Well, I think a belated party might be in order.”
“That’s okay,” I said. “I’ve had my birthday. Let’s just say it’s a barbecue.”
“All right,” said Jackson.
That very afternoon, we made some of our party calls. Mrs. Brown said that she probably couldn’t make it, but that she would tell Nirvana. Jackson’s students Shari and Win both said that they’d come. The party was set for the following evening. When I got back to the apartment, I asked Angela to come and bring Yvonne and Maria. Angela said she’d tell Rayelle and Terry. I was so excited that I could hardly sleep that night. It was difficult waiting all the next day, too.
I went to Jackson’s early so I could help set up. The heat wave had finally broken, so the weather was breezy and cool. I brought the barbecue food outside and put the junk food into bowls. Jackson had set up a folding table next to the shed. We had salad as well as hot dogs and burgers. The flowers I’d painted on the stone border had dried perfectly! We thought that the large stones in the back would be great for seats, along with the hammock and the two beat-up lawn chairs from the shed. Even though I knew it would get messed up right away, I got out the broom and swept the yard. Jackson carried out an ice chest filled with ice and cans of soda. Then he started a fire in the grill that I’d fixed, and the guests began to arrive.
I was so happy to see Nirvana!
“Look at this incredible house,” she whispered behind her hand, trying to control her excitement. She squealed softly. “Look at these weird stone things!”
“They’re sculptures,” I said.
“Interesting,” said Dill. “Very interesting.”
Jackson seemed to like Dill and Nirvana right away. Dill instantly offered to cook the burgers.
“My turn to cook,” Jackson said, declining Dill’s offer. “Your turn to relax and have a good time.”
Jackson’s students Shari and Win arrived together.
Shari gave me a tape. “It’s Mahalia Jackson,” she said.
I felt a warm glow inside. “Thanks,” I said, putting the tape in my pocket. “I can’t wait to hear it.”
Win hardly said a thing. But Nirvana certainly noticed him. “What a hunk!” she joked. “And he also sings?”
“He has a great voice,” I told her.
Dill grabbed Nirvana’s hand and cleared his throat. “Ever heard me sing, baby?”
Yvonne and Maria were among the last to arrive. They came with Rayelle and Terry. At the last minute, Angela hadn’t been able to make it. Yvonne discovered Brielle’s tutu in the shed, and Jackson said that she could have it. Maria sat down in the hammock right away and ordered Rayelle to swing her.
It was the perfect party! Everyone seemed to be having fun, even Jackson. He hummed a little tune while he cooked the burgers and hot dogs at the grill. The yard was filled with the smell of sizzling barbecue. My mouth watered as I ambled over for a hot dog on a bun and slathered it with spicy mustard. People wandered around, munching and chatting, or they swung in the hammock, or listened to the hip-hop tape that Dill had brought. It was light for a really long time. The sun was fading just a little and the evening star was rising, when the doorbell rang.
“Who could that be?” Jackson sang out, hurrying inside.
My heart began beating faster.
Ma!
I ran to her arms and buried my head in the curve of her neck. She hugged me tight. She was wearing the beautiful soft blue outfit that she wore in my picture! “Surprise!” she whispered. “I went to fetch you at the boarding home, and Angela told me where you were! I even brought a present for Mr. Jackson!”
“What is it?” I asked breathlessly.
A big smile spread across her face. Everything about her was sparkling.
“Flower bulbs! You can plant them in the autumn. They’ll grow come springtime, you’ll see!”
I dashed over to Jackson and waved Ma’s small brown bag of bulbs in his face. “Look, Ma b
rought flower bulbs! It’s never too late for flowers!”
“We have stone flowers, too!” Jackson announced happily. “Exquisite stone flowers!”
“Exquisite,” I agreed with a grin, “even though they’re make-believe!” I laughed.
Suddenly, Jackson and Ma were shaking hands. “That daughter of yours is very special,” Jackson told her.
“I know that,” Ma said proudly.
“Come and see what’s she’s done with the yard,” Jackson said, leading her away. “Hurry, before the sun goes down.”
I caught Ma’s hand as she slipped past me. “I thought you’d be gone forever,” I whispered.
She beamed at me. Her eyes were full of joy. “Sometimes three weeks can seem like forever.”
But that’s not what happened.
Jackson came back with Mrs. Brown. She’d come, after all. “Surprise!” she called out. “I took a taxi!” I waved. She’d brought a box and a big plate of cookies.
I stood at the edge of the yard, watching the parts of my life come together. Only a few weeks before, I hadn’t known Jackson, or Yvonne and Maria, or Rayelle and Terry, or Win and Shari. Now, here we all were, with Nirvana and Dill and Mrs. Brown, having a party in Jackson’s yard. Of course, three of the main parts of my life were missing—Ma, Otis, and Dad. Like three big holes in the sky, the hole for Dad much smaller and farther away than the holes for Ma and Otis, near and gaping. It was as if a swift tornado had come and picked my world up and dropped it back down.
And I was still there.
“Haley! Haley!” Jackson was calling. A chocolate cake with candles had been in Mrs. Brown’s box! He perched it on top of a stone while everyone gathered around.
“Look at this!” he cried.
A beautiful feeling floated up inside of me.
“Is that for me?”
Jackson smiled and lit the candles.
I hurried across the yard to blow them out.
For more than forty years, Yearling has been the leading name in classic and award-winning literature for young readers.
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Text copyright © 2001 by Sharon Dennis Wyeth
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June 2002
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