“Edward,” she whispered frantically, “please.”
Her whispered plea cut through the haze of longing that surrounded him and Edward dragged his body back under control.
What the hell was he doing? He could not take her here, in a damned carriage. Much as he wanted to she deserved so much more.
Reluctantly, he dragged himself away from her and sat up then reached down to pull her back into a seated position. But he was still human so he settled her onto his lap once again. They were both panting and Edward leaned his forehead against hers while he caught his breath.
“I am sorry, sweetheart,” he murmured, “I do not know what I was thinking. I wasn’t thinking. You’d make a saint lose his mind. And I am no saint.”
“Well, I am sorry too,” she whispered, “sorry you stopped.”
His eyes snapped up at her bold statement and he was momentarily distracted from his raging lust by the annoyed look on her face.
He felt amusement as well as a pure masculine pride well up inside him.
“Believe me, it took more strength than I knew I possessed to stop. But I had to. You do not know what would have happened.”
“I am perfectly aware of what would have happened, thank you.” She paused then and conceded, “Well, I have a general idea.”
He chuckled softly and kissed her forehead, not daring to touch her lips again.
“Rebecca, my love, you deserve more, much, much more than having your innocence taken in the back of a filthy carriage.”
“It is a very nice carriage,” she argued mutinously.
“Yes, it is,” he agreed, “but it is still a carriage and your first time making love will not be in one.”
Rebecca stared at him a moment then moved to sit on the other side of the vehicle. He saw hurt and embarrassment flash across her face.
Oh no, he thought, bracing himself for a storm, what was she thinking now?
Rebecca’s head had finally cleared and she realised just what they’d been doing and what he must think of her. Dear God, she had thrown herself at him and then practically begged him to — to — oh, she could not even think it. And in a carriage? If anyone knew what a wanton she was, she would be disowned by the lot of them.
He would despise her now; think her even more unworthy. She went from the most exquisite happiness to torturous misery in seconds. And here came the damned headache again.
I should say something; apologise or explain or, or something. Clearing her throat she steeled herself to look into his eyes. Oh they were so beautiful in the moonlight, all silver and shining and—
No Rebecca! She scolded herself. Do not get distracted.
“Your grace,” she began only to be interrupted by his snort of incredulity.
“Your grace?” he questioned disbelievingly.
“Your grace,” she repeated firmly, “I must apologise for my behaviour just now. I do not know what came over me. I, I am not usually so w-wanton and…” she trailed off miserably, finishing with a whispered, “What must you think of me?”
Edward gazed at her in amazement. If he lived to be one hundred he would never understand the female mind.
“What must I think of you? I will tell you, shall I?” he grasped her arms again and this time deposited her on the seat beside him so he could grip her hands. “I think you are the most infuriating, stubborn, scandalous little minx I’ve ever come across.” Her eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth, no doubt to issue a tirade but he continued quickly, before she had the chance to speak.
“I also think you are the kindest, warmest, wittiest and brightest person I’ve ever met. And you are far, far too beautiful for my peace of mind. It seems that I have no thoughts left anymore, but thoughts of you. You are the first thing I think of when I wake in the morning and the only thing I dream of at night. I am completely under your spell.”
Rebecca’s mouth hung open by the end of his announcement.
“That is quite a speech,” she said a little breathlessly.
“Not even rehearsed,” he stated proudly.
At this she laughed. He really was terribly arrogant and she loved him so much it hurt.
“So do not worry about anything I think of you,” he continued, “and your wantonness, as long as it is reserved for me, is certainly nothing to apologise for,” he finished with a wicked wink and a grin.
“It is,” she confessed, “only for you. I’ve never even experienced this, this want before, until you.”
Rebecca wanted with all her heart to tell him that she loved him. But he had not said that he loved her and though his words warmed her heart, they were not words of love.
His eyes gleamed at her words and he kissed her again. But before either of them could get swept away again, the carriage rolled to a stop outside the dowager’s house.
Edward pulled away reluctantly. He would have the rest of their lives to kiss her once they were married. He should probably mention that to her, actually.
“Let me see you inside,” he said as he stepped out of the carriage and handed her down. He kept his hand on her lower back as she walked up the steps and into the house before him.
Once they entered the hallway, Edward dismissed Jeffries and led Rebecca to the drawing room. There was a fire burning merrily in the hearth and candles bathing the room in a soft, warm glow.
“My mother will return soon so I will take my leave lest she berate me for my impropriety,” Edward spoke quietly.
Rebecca merely nodded. If only his mother knew of her son’s impropriety!
“It would not do for her to see us alone together. Again.”
Rebecca nodded again but felt her heart sink. If the dowager saw them alone and acting in any way inappropriately, she would demand a marriage. This was obviously not something Edward wanted. And Rebecca did not want it either.
Oh, she would love nothing more than to be married to the man she loved. But to be married to Edward when he did not love her, when he’d been forced into it, and when he thought her wholly unsuitable? He may lust after her now. He may even care for her. But lust would fade and he would grow to resent her.
And then, what if one day he fell in love? He would stay married to Rebecca because he was an honourable man. But he would not love her. His heart would belong to another. Would he take a mistress? The thought was unbearable.
Rebecca steeled her shoulders and smiled.
“No it would not do. She would have you wed to me without a moment’s pause. It would be a disaster.”
She was trying her best to be brave, but could feel tears burn the back of her throat and she wanted him to leave so she could cry and wail in peace.
Edward’s heart froze when Rebecca spoke of a marriage between them being a disaster. But he was coming to know his little tigress quite well and he could see in her eyes that there was something else going on in that infuriating head of hers.
“A disaster, sweetheart?”
He walked toward her so he stood mere inches from her. Clasping her shoulders, he smiled softly and said, “It would be a lot of interesting things, but far from a disaster.”
Rebecca’s breath caught in her throat. What was he saying? Was he saying he wanted to marry her? Or at the least that it would not be horrifying for him?
He could practically hear the wheels turning in her head. He was so very tempted to open his heart to her but he did not want to overwhelm her. She was young and innocent. And thought him ‘sensible and practical’. How could someone like him appeal to someone like her?
They both had quite enough to think about tonight. There would be time tomorrow to discuss the confusing emotions radiating from both of them.
“Goodnight Rebecca” he whispered, still clutching her shoulders.
“Goodnight Edward,” she responded shakily.
He pulled her forward and placed a tender kiss on her head, just like that afternoon on her father’s estate when she’d yelled at him for not kissing her properly.
T
he thought made him smile. It seemed a lifetime ago.
He turned to leave, thoughts of how to convince her that he was not the boring and sedate man she seemed to think him swirling around his head.
He glanced back before he left and ground to a halt. She was so heart-achingly beautiful. He would not rest, could not rest, until he made her his.
Swiftly crossing the room again, he gathered her in his arms and gave her an earth-shattering kiss.
“Tomorrow,” he whispered against her lips, “we will discuss our future tomorrow. Dream of me, my love.”
Rebecca raised her fingers to her lips, still tingling from his kiss. We will discuss our future tomorrow. What did that mean?
That night, for probably the first time in her life, Rebecca did as she was told. She dreamed of Edward.
****
Outside, it took all of George Simons’ willpower not to murder the duke as he left the Townhouse. He knew he would not get very far with the duke’s man watching the house. George had had to settle for watching from a further distance than he wanted.
He took another slug of whiskey, the burn in his throat unnoticeable above the burn of anger in the pit of his stomach.
She was his. The sooner that duke got that into his head, the better.
George wasn’t stupid. He knew his life would be forfeit if he put his hands on a peer. But things were progressing between the duke and Rebecca. Even a blind man would be able to see.
It was time to act.
Tomorrow. She would be his. Even if it killed him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Rebecca slept surprisingly well and awoke the next day filled with an excited anticipation.
She had thought about her conversation with Edward last night. She had thought a great deal more about everything else that had happened with Edward last night, but had given some consideration to what they’d said and realized that she had left a lot unsaid and thought that perhaps Edward had too.
And he’d spoken of their future.
Rebecca had decided in the night, while tossing and turning trying to make out Edward’s meaning, that she would be honest with him. After all, what did she have to lose? Only her pride. And pride was no substitute for having Edward by her side.
She was going to tell him that she loved him. She knew, of course, that she was still wholly unsuitable to being a duchess but she would try her hardest to change. She meant to ask Caroline, the dowager, her mother, anyone to help her become the type of lady deserving of the title.
Of course he could have meant that they had no future but Rebecca could not believe that. Not after his kisses. Not after the wonderful things he’d said to her. No, he must feel something for her and even if it was not love it could perhaps develop into love over time.
Rebecca joined the dowager and Caroline for breakfast and, try as she might, she could not keep the smile from her face.
“Why, Rebecca you are positively glowing this morning,” remarked the dowager.
Rebecca blushed and thanked the older lady.
“Is there a reason for such a happy countenance?” she asked.
“No, your grace,” answered Rebecca staidly. “None that I can think of.”
The door to the dining room opened and Edward swept in with Tom following behind. They could see Jeffries shaking his head in despair behind the two gentlemen.
“Do calm down, Jeffries,” Edward called behind him, “there is really no cause to announce me in my own mother’s house.”
He walked round the table to kiss the dowager on the cheek and take a seat to her right, beside Rebecca.
“Technically, it is your house darling,” said the dowager with a smile.
“Nonsense, I have a house. This is yours to leave to whomever you choose.”
The dowager looked surprised but extremely pleased.
“Why, Edward. I had no idea. That is very kind, my son. Though who would I leave it to, but my son? Or perhaps my adopted one who has yet to greet me?” she answered mischievously drawing the attention of Mr. Crawdon who was busy filling his plate.
Tom smiled widely and after dropping his plate on the table beside Caroline, he hurried around the table to plant a loud kiss on the dowager’s cheek.
“That is better.” She grinned.
“So what brings you two here this morning?” the dowager asked.
Edward had moved to the sideboard to fill his plate and Rebecca tried to keep her eyes away from him but she was struggling not to watch his every move. He had not spoken save to give a general greeting to her and Caroline but as he was passing her chair she’d felt the brush of his hand on her shoulders.
“No idea,” answered Tom who had resumed his seat and started to demolish his breakfast. “I was woken with the birds and told to come!”
Edward resumed his seat and looked a little flustered.
“Was there a reason you needed to come so early, dear?” asked the dowager innocently, though there was a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
Edward glanced quickly at Rebecca before answering.
“Do I need a reason to want to break my fast with my own mother? Really, mother one would think you did not want us here.”
“My dear, you know you are always sure of the warmest of welcomes from me. It is just a little unusual, that is all.”
Before Edward could answer, Jeffries entered with a silver tray bearing a small card.
“For you, my lady,” he bowed, presenting the card to Rebecca.
Rebecca was a little taken aback. Though they had received plenty of invitations since their arrival, they usually came to the dowager or even Caroline, being the eldest. And their morning calls would not begin for a couple of hours yet.
“There is a footman awaiting your reply,” Jeffries explained.
Rebecca took the envelope and studied the direction. The penmanship was unfamiliar to her though it certainly belonged to a lady. Intrigued, she opened the missive and her jaw dropped in surprise.
“What is it?” asked Caroline curiously.
“An invitation to the Vauxhall Gardens” —Rebecca’s confused look remained on her face— “for tonight, for you and I, Caroline.”
“How nice,” answered Caroline, “though it is a little rude to issue an invitation at such short notice. Who is it from?”
Rebecca gave Edward a loaded look before answering, “Lady Sarah.”
Now everyone looked confused.
“Lady Sarah?” asked the dowager, “Are you acquainted with that lady?”
“As much as I want to be,” answered Rebecca bluntly.
Caroline laughed a little nervously.
“Rebecca and Lady Sarah seemed to have a little, um — clash of personalities, your grace,” she explained.
“She is vile,” said Rebecca, which was another way of putting it, Caroline supposed.
“Good heavens,” said the dowager, clearly amused, “I cannot say I feel anything more than the merest tolerance for the lady but I do not think I’ve ever heard her described as ‘vile’.”
“Oh that is not all Lady Rebecca had to say on the subject of Lady Sarah, Aunt,” Mr. Crawdon piped up with a wide grin. “She also called her old and ugly.”
“I did not,” said Rebecca hotly, “I said her dress was ugly. And she started it.”
The dowager burst into gales of laughter.
“Oh, my dear you never fail to amuse me.”
“Yes, well as amusing as this all may be,” began Edward, who had been silently studying the invitation, “it makes it abundantly clear that Rebecca and Lady Sarah are hardly friends. Why then, the sudden invitation?”
“You suspect something?” asked Rebecca.
“I am not sure. Lady Sarah is mostly harmless, though she does not like to be bested. And you, my dear, put her very firmly in her place.”
“Well, it does not signify anyway, since we will not be going,” said Caroline.
“What? Why not?” asked Rebecca.
Caro
line stared at her.
“You cannot want to go?”
“Well, if I were to choose a companion it certainly would not be that haggard old b—”
“Ahem,” the dowager’s well-timed cough cut into Rebecca’s tirade.
“But,” Rebecca continued more demurely, “I have always desperately wanted to go the gardens. The dancing, the performers, the fireworks! It sounds so magical.”
“It is also highly improper for a group of ladies to attend unaccompanied. The place itself is barely proper as it is. Besides, she has left it far too late to ask us. I am sure the dowager has plans for us.”
Rebecca frowned. Much as she disliked Lady Sarah, she was intrigued by what the woman was up to. And she did so want to visit the gardens.
But Caroline was right, it would be unspeakably rude to accept the invitation at such short notice when the dowager was bound to have plans for them already.
“Oh do not worry on that score, my dears,” the dowager spoke up, “I had planned a quiet night at home anyway. You should take the opportunity to go and enjoy yourselves. I am sure Lady Sarah would not mind the addition of Edward and Tom who will be happy to escort you, will you not?”
“Yes, of course,” answered Edward quickly. He turned to Rebecca. “If you are going to insist on going, and I realise the futility of arguing the matter with you, then I want to be there to see what she is up to.”
“So we’re going?” Her eyes shone with excitement and Edward wondered how in the world anyone was supposed to refuse her anything. He doubted they ever had. And he was certain that he would never be able to.
“If you want to go, then we’ll go.”
Rebecca turned to Caroline with a questioning look.
Caroline sighed and finally relented.
“Fine. We shall go but I warn you, Rebecca, you are to behave.”
“I will! Oh I am so excited. I shall write our acceptance immediately.”
She jumped from her chair and ran from the room.
An Unlikely Duchess Page 23