by Julia Sykes
But I’d never earn her trust again if I wasn’t honest with her. I needed her trust; I craved it. The feel of her softening beneath me as she gave me everything was too addictive. I’d risk anything to have that back.
“I’m not a good man,” I murmured. “I’m not, but I wanted to be.”
I still wanted it, but now that I’d been dragged back to my violent life, I knew that was just a childish dream.
“That’s why I ran away to Cambridge,” I continued. “I wanted to start over, to have a simpler life. I thought I could have that with you, but instead, I pulled you into my world. And I’m sorry for that.”
She stared up at me, hopeful. “So, you are sorry for kidnapping me?”
“I’m sorry I put you in danger. But no, I’m not sorry Marco took you and brought you to me.” Raw honesty was the only way forward here. “I want you, Ashlyn. I need you with me. I was a fucking mess without you.”
“I wasn’t doing great without you, either,” she admitted. “I want to be with you, but not like this. Can’t we just go back to Cambridge? I’m scared, Joseph. Marco said you’re part of the mafia, and he said your enemies… He said they’d hurt me.” A small tremor ran through her body.
Damn Marco for scaring her. He’d been trying to talk some sense into her, but he’d been too blunt. I never would have told her the fucked-up things our enemies might do to her if they caught her. I wanted to shield her from that fear.
“We can’t go back,” I told her, the words acid on my tongue. I wished we could, but I wouldn’t be able to protect her there. Not by myself. The dream of sharing a normal life with her was shattered beyond repair, and all I could do was let it go. Marco was right; this was our reality. Ashlyn and I both had to face it.
“I am sorry for that, but I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe. Even if that means you hate me for keeping you here, I’ll do it.”
“I… I don’t hate you. I don’t think I’m capable of it.”
Relief surged through me.
She doesn’t hate me. It wasn’t the same as trusting me, but it was a start. I’d earn her trust back. It would just take time. She’d adjust and accept her place here with me. It might never be possible for her to return to her old life. Even if we dealt with my father’s enemies and the immediate danger passed, she was in my world now.
I might not like the world I lived in, but it would be bearable with Ashlyn in my arms.
“I’m everything Marco said I am,” I told her. “I’m all that and worse. Like I said, I’m not a good man. But I’ll be good to you. I’ll take care of you, just like I did in Cambridge. I might have hidden my past from you, but that part of me was never a lie. All I want is to take care of you. I know you don’t want to be here, but I’m still going to try to make you happy. Will you give me a chance to do that?”
Her eyes were tight with longing. She wanted everything I promised. She wanted to be sheltered and adored.
She just didn’t want to be my captive.
“I want to go back to school,” she begged. “Please, take me back. And stay there with me.”
Maybe Marco had been right to be so blunt with her. She still wasn’t fully grasping the danger she faced.
“I wish I could give you what you want, but I can’t. I can’t make any promises about taking you back. I can’t let you go. I won’t.”
Ashlyn was mine, and it was time she acknowledged it. She already belonged to me. I could feel it in the way she leaned into me for comfort even as she begged me to release her. This might not be the way she wanted to be with me, but at least we were together. My life had been hell without her, and I wasn’t sorry for keeping her.
I’d just have to remind her how good it could be between us.
I shifted my hand in her hair so I grasped her nape, and I pulled her toward me so I could finally capture her lips.
Fuck, I’d forgotten how good she tasted—pure sin from the mouth of an angel.
I’d licked at the salt of her tears this morning, but those were apologetic kisses, meant to soothe.
I didn’t want to soothe her now. I wanted to consume her.
As soon as her lips parted for me, my tongue surged into her mouth on a hungry growl. My other hand eased up her thigh, the reverent touch contrasting with the almost brutal way I claimed her lips. I nipped at them, kissing her hard enough to make them swollen.
Good. I wanted her to bear marks of my possession. I might not be able to mark her skin like I truly wanted, but I could allow myself this one dark pleasure. I knew my sweet, pure angel was far too innocent for all the kinky things I wanted to do to her, so I’d hold back.
Mostly.
My fingers dipped beneath the hem of the silk nightgown, and I found her lower lips were swollen, too. She was slick and ready for me. I brushed my thumb over her clit. It was hard, needy. She mewled into my mouth, and I devoured the sound.
I withdrew from her pussy and palmed her breasts, re-learning their weight and shape; memorizing the perfection of her peaked nipples.
It still wasn’t enough. I could feel her through the silk, but I needed to see her.
I tore my mouth from hers, and she made a little sound of protest. Her hands curled into my shoulders, and she tried to pull me closer.
She’d never been a match for my strength. I loved how delicate and fragile she felt in my hands. I might kiss her roughly, but I handled her with aching care.
I guided her down onto her back, stretching her out on the bed beneath me. I placed her arms above her head, squeezing her wrists gently to reinforce my control.
“Don’t move,” I ordered. I was already riding the intoxicating high I got off even this light domination. She was so fucking beautiful in her willing submission to me. She stared up at me with her big blue eyes, her breathing coming fast and shallow. I released her wrists, and her arms remained above her head.
Perfect.
I fisted the silky nightgown in both hands. With one jerk of my arms, the thin material ripped down the middle. The savage tearing sound mingled with my primal growl. I was getting lost in her, drunk on my power over her.
Her wide eyes told me she was shocked by my aggressive actions, but her body reacted beautifully. She gasped and arched her back, thrusting her exposed breasts up to silently beg for my touch.
I settled my weight over her hips, ensuring she was pinned beneath me. She moaned and arched again, struggling to get her nipples closer to my mouth.
I gave her what she wanted, licking the tight buds before gently sucking them. Her head thrashed against the pillow, but she didn’t move her hands in an effort to hold me against her.
I wedged my thigh between her legs, and she rotated her hips, grinding against me. Her wetness marked my jeans. She was eager, desperate.
And so was I.
I couldn’t take the time to get undressed, so I pushed aside the urge to feel her skin sliding against mine. I could indulge that desire that later. Right now, I needed to get inside her more than I needed my next breath.
I reached into Marco’s nightstand drawer and grabbed a condom. Ashlyn watched me, her eyes wild and needy. I bit back a curse and freed my cock from my jeans and boxers, sheathing myself before lining up with her slick opening.
I leaned over her, pressing her deeper into the mattress with my weight. She squirmed beneath me, rubbing herself against me like a needy kitten. But she still didn’t move her arms from above her head.
“Such a good girl,” I praised, brushing her hair back from her cheek. “Are you ready for me, angel?”
“Yes,” she panted. “Please, Joseph. I need you.”
I sank my fingers into her hair, tightening my grip around the lustrous strands as I tipped her head back for a ruthless kiss. She cried out into my mouth when I thrust into her at the same time.
Her inner walls contracted around me, struggling to take to my size after a month of emptiness. My lips firmed around hers as I struggled to control myself. I stilled within h
er, allowing her time to adjust. I should have kissed her more gently, coaxing her. But I couldn’t. Need drove me to the edge of sanity, and I couldn’t be as careful with her as I’d been in the past.
Her muscles finally began to relax around me. Shock tore through me when my little innocent angel wrapped her legs around my hips and dug her heels into my ass, pulling me deeper.
I groaned against her and pulled almost all the way out before driving back into her, hard enough to rock her body beneath mine. She moved with me, drawing me in to the hilt. Animal instinct took over, and I snarled into her mouth. She moaned and opened for me, her tongue dancing with mine.
She hadn’t tried to move her hands, but I curled my fingers around her wrists and pinned them against the pillow. I needed to feel her trapped beneath me, writhing and whimpering as I took her, hard and relentless. She screamed out her orgasm, the sound of her pleasure vibrating into my mouth.
I didn’t want to finish with her just yet, but too much time had passed without her in my life. Her ecstasy triggered mine, and I came undone on a shout, driving into her without finesse as I rode my release. Her pussy fluttered around me with the aftershocks of her own orgasm. She went limp beneath me, exhausted and sated.
I finally broke our kiss and gasped out a curse as the last of my orgasm faded. I rolled off her, but I pulled her with me so she was draped over my chest.
“I missed you so much,” she murmured against my neck.
I didn’t have words heavy enough to express how empty I’d been without her, how happy I was to have her back in my arms.
I captured her lips again, kissing her slow and deep this time. If I couldn’t tell her how I felt, I’d show her.
Chapter Eight
Ashlyn
Joseph collapsed beside me, breathing hard. I rolled with him, keeping him inside me. He’d just given me yet another explosive orgasm, but I wasn’t ready to be parted from him. When we’d had sex last night, he hadn’t taken off his clothes. I’d needed him too desperately to care about it then, but now, I definitely appreciated his naked body. He was even harder and bulkier than I remembered. I wasn’t certain what he did with his days—I had no clue what it meant to be a mobster—but whatever he did, it required more physical exertion than bartending. I’d thought he was massive and muscular when I’d first met him, but now he was impossibly more ripped. His abs flexed against me as I trailed my fingernails over them, memorizing the way his muscles rippled and danced beneath my light touch.
I explored further, running my palm over his hard chest and down his corded arm, feeling his strength. His masculine perfection was enough to make my mouth water and my pussy clench. He grunted as my inner walls contracted around his cock.
“You shouldn’t do that, angel,” he warned.
“Why not?” I squeezed again, and he groaned. He began to stiffen inside me, even though we’d just finished a few minutes ago. Knowing I had this effect on him made a sense of feminine power course through me.
He chuckled, low and dark. He shifted, withdrawing from me so he could manhandle me into position. He grasped my ankles and guided them up to rest against his shoulders before he moved over me. His weight forced my thighs close to my chest, spreading me wide for him. He gripped my wrists and pinned them at either side of my head. We’d played a few games like this back in Cambridge, but he was different now. More demanding. Less restrained.
My pussy wept for him, swelling and growing slick in response to the way he handled my body.
A sharp knock on the door made me yelp, shattering the moment. Joseph wasn’t in any particular rush to roll off me, and I barely managed to get my legs down and jerk the sheet over my body before the door opened.
I gaped at Marco where he stood at the threshold.
“Close the door!” I demanded, pulling the sheet up to my chin.
His heavy brows rose. “It’s my bedroom.”
“Joseph,” I said sharply, looking over at him. I expected him to come to my defense and throw his overbearing friend out.
He didn’t appear upset in the slightest. He’d almost beaten a guy for grabbing my arm once, but he’d allow his friend to walk in on us when we were about to have sex?
“What?” he asked his friend, but he still didn’t sound aggressive or even annoyed.
“I made breakfast,” Marco told him. “Finish up and come down, or it’ll get cold.”
A little noise of disbelief huffed from my chest when he sauntered off, not bothering to close the door behind him.
“What the hell?” I asked, looking back to Joseph. “You almost ripped Stu apart for touching me at the bar in Cambridge, but you let your best friend ogle me?”
“He wasn’t ogling you. He came to tell us he made breakfast.”
“I’m naked,” I reminded him, wondering what had happened to my fierce, possessive protector.
He gave me a lopsided smile. “And you pulled the covers up high enough that he could barely see your face. Marco won’t touch you, Ashlyn. You don’t need to be afraid of him.”
I scoffed. Of course I was afraid of him. Marco was even more heavily muscled than Joseph, and he lacked any kindness in his hard black eyes. The only times I’d ever seen him look remotely amused, it had been at my expense.
“Hey,” Joseph said, more gently. He took my hand in his. “I know he scared you yesterday, but Marco was just trying to help. He was trying to make you understand that he brought you here for your own good. We just want to protect you. Both of us.”
I searched his face, studying him. He seemed completely sincere, but I wasn’t certain that he had an accurate view of his friend’s true nature. There was something dark about Marco, something deep in his soul. Joseph might hate his life of violence—he’d made that much clear—but Marco didn’t seem at all bothered by it. He probably thrived on it.
“I want you to come back to Cambridge with me,” I announced. “After, I mean,” I said before he could start lecturing me about his enemies again. “After the danger has passed, I want to go back to school, and I want you to come with me.”
Something shifted in his eyes, but the shadow was gone so fast, I was sure I must have imagined it.
He brushed a kiss against my forehead. “I’d like that, angel.”
“Good. Then I’ll stay here with you. I can take a little time off school, as long as I try to keep up with my coursework. I don’t suppose Marco grabbed my books when he abducted me?” I asked, although I knew that was highly unlikely.
“He didn’t, but I’ll buy new editions for you. Can you access your syllabi online?”
“Yes. I just need the textbooks so I can follow along with the assignments. If I can send another email to my professors, I’ll ask if someone will volunteer to upload their class notes for me. Would that be okay?” I didn’t like asking for permission, but I doubted I’d be granted access to the internet. Joseph might be pleased that I’d agreed to stay, but I didn’t believe for a second that Marco would trust me near a computer.
“Of course,” Joseph agreed easily. “Just write out the message, and Marco will send the email. I’ll order your books online today. We can go over what you need after breakfast.” He gave me a crooked smile that made my heart melt. “We really should go downstairs. Marco gets cranky if his food goes cold.”
“Why doesn’t he just eat without us?”
I followed Joseph out of bed and went through the shopping bags he’d brought me last night, looking for something to wear.
“He probably won’t wait for us, but he doesn’t like when his culinary creations aren’t enjoyed properly.”
I shot him an incredulous glance. “Marco doesn’t strike me as the type who would care about something like that.”
“I think you have the wrong impression of him. Marco likes cooking for people. It’s one of his hobbies.”
“If you say so,” I allowed. I couldn’t imagine Marco caring enough about anyone to worry what they thought of his cooking.
&
nbsp; I kept searching through the bags, but I couldn’t find what I was looking for.
“Where are the bras and underwear?” I asked.
Joseph’s smile turned wolfish. “There aren’t any.”
“I can’t go around without a bra,” I said, aghast at the thought of my nipples poking through the thin camisoles he’d gotten for me.
“Yes, you can. There’s no one here to see.” He stepped toward me, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me close so he could whisper in my ear. “I want access to your body at all times. Does it bother you that I want to be able to fuck you without panties getting in the way? If I’d gotten them for you, I’d just end up ripping them off. That would be a waste, don’t you think?”
“But… Marco’s here,” I spluttered.
“He’ll be fine.”
“I don’t want him looking at me.” Marco made me uncomfortable. He liked to get in my personal space. He liked intimidating me. I could see it in the way emotion sparked in his eyes when he got close to me. At all other times, he appeared almost bored, detached. But when he made me squirm, I saw pleasure stir in his dark gaze. It was beyond unnerving.
“Then I’ll tell him not to look,” Joseph promised, as though that settled it. “Now, get dressed. I don’t want Marco getting pissy.”
“But I…”
“Now, Ashlyn.” He fixed me with a stern stare he’d never turned on me before.
I was pulling on the camisole and yoga pants before I fully processed my actions. I wasn’t scared of Joseph, but that deeper note in his voice warned me not to defy him. I wasn’t sure what would happen if I did, but I didn’t even think about testing him.
When I was dressed, the stern expression melted, replaced by a dazzling smile that knocked the air from my chest. He planted a swift kiss on my lips and took my hand in his, leading me out of the bedroom.
I finally had a chance to look around the house a little as we made our way to the kitchen; I’d been too emotional last night to really take it in. Well, house wasn’t an accurate word. From the little bit I’d seen, Marco lived in a mansion, with enough white marble and gold gilding to make it look like an Italian palace. The effect was ostentatious, and that didn’t fit with the no-nonsense vibe I’d gotten from Marco.