“I agree. And what about Frank? Is Tom still talking about making him an officer?”
“No, not after I told him what you’d heard,” Lyle said. “He was mortified at the thought of Frank dating black women.”
“Did he want proof of it?”
“No. Said a rumor like that was just as bad as having it happen, and that having someone like him in such a high position could mean trouble. So I’m afraid good old Frank is going to be the director of training until he decides to leave the company.”
“Too bad,” Jim added.
“Where is it that they’re having Elizabeth’s good-bye party?”
“Ricardo’s. You know. Downtown.”
“Oh yeah,” Lyle remembered. “That new place.”
“I’m planning on leaving here in about a hour. What about you?”
“I’ll do the same and ride with you, if you don’t mind. I can pick my car up when we come back by here.”
“Not a problem.”
“Finally, everything is settling down around here the way it should, so maybe now we can start back concentrating on something more important.”
“That’s for sure. We never used to have to work this hard in the past to keep things the way we want them, but it was worth every man-hour we dedicated to it.”
“I told you it’s those damn laws,” Lyle reiterated.
“But what these lawmakers don’t know is that they haven’t stopped a thing here at Reed Meyers. And if I have anything to do with it, they never will,” Jim said.
Lyle agreed with him and they moved on to another order of business.
I couldn’t believe the salary grade for the manufacturing HR manager’s position was one grade lower than the one for corporate recruiting manager. Jim had given me an official offer letter this morning, but I hadn’t paid much attention to the grade level. They’d given me a twenty-six percent raise, and I’d signed the bottom of the letter almost immediately. I hadn’t expected them to throw me for a loop at the last minute, so I was completely caught off guard. I’d expressed my concerns about it to Jim, but he insisted it didn’t mean anything. I told him I was under the impression that the manufacturing position was equal to the corporate one, but he claimed they’d always been different. He didn’t seem to understand what difference it made, because I would have gotten the same pay increase either way. But what I tried to make him realize was that the corporate position topped out five thousand dollars more than the one in manufacturing, and that meant I would have had more room to grow with the corporate one. He told me that I shouldn’t worry, because by the time I topped out, I’d be promoted to something else. I knew that was a fat chance, but once again, I decided to grin and bear the situation.
I scanned the room at Ricardo’s where we were having Elizabeth’s going-away party. Everyone from each division of human resources was here to celebrate, along with quite a few other employees she was close to. The music was a bit louder than I preferred, and since I didn’t drink, I had to find other ways to entertain myself. If it hadn’t been for my relationship with Elizabeth, I probably wouldn’t have been here. But sometimes we do things we don’t want to because it’s right.
“I hear congratulations are in order,” Connie from public relations yelled over Mariah Carey’s voice, and then sat down at my table for two.
“Thank you,” I yelled just as loudly.
“I still haven’t heard anything about the corporate recruiting position, so I assume they’re not going to fill it. I heard through the grapevine, though, that a management position is going to open up in purchasing pretty soon, and if it does, I’m going to apply for it,” she said.
I almost cracked up in her face. What did Connie possibly know about purchasing? First, it was recruiting, then it was benefits and now she was dying to get into purchasing? I didn’t know how she thought she could simply leave public relations and go manage a department she knew nothing about. It just didn’t make any sense. She seemed so excited and confident about it, too. But she would soon find out that Jim and Lyle were never going to promote her into any of those positions.
“Go for it, girl,” I said, feeling guilty because I knew I wasn’t being honest about the way I felt.
“I am. I’m going to get out of public relations yet.”
“I hear you.”
“Well, I’d better get over there and have another daiquiri before Lyle and Jim stop buying.”
“I don’t blame you.”
“Hey, girl,” Lorna said, taking a seat.
Kelli Jacobson walked up at the same time as Lorna.
“Congratulations on the promotion, Anise,” Kelli said, smiling.
I couldn’t tell whether her well-wishes were genuine or synthetic.
“Thank you,” I acknowledged.
“Maybe I should have applied for that position, too, because it looks like the recruiting one is on hold indefinitely.”
“Maybe you should have,” I said, wondering why she’d come over here.
“It wouldn’t have mattered, though, because everyone knew you were the best person for the job. Jim is always talking about how well you fit in with the factory employees, and really, I wouldn’t know where to begin when it comes to those people.”
“What do you mean, ‘those people’?” I asked defensively.
“You know. The people who work out in the shop.”
“Well, first of all, Kelli, I believe I’m qualified to work with all people at Reed Meyers. Factory, clerical, corporate—”
“She’s even qualified to work with poor white trash like you,” Lorna interrupted.
Lorna and I turned and looked at each other, laughing hysterically. It wasn’t funny, but we knew our amusement would annoy our uninvited visitor.
“This is a conversation between Anise and me, Lorna, so I think you’d better mind your own business,” Kelli said.
“Anise is my business, and if you don’t step away from this table, you’re going to get your little ass kicked.”
“How unprofessional,” Kelli said, pursing her lips, and walked away.
“What a stupid, ignorant, whorish bitch,” Lorna said.
“I can’t believe she even had the audacity to bring her butt over here.”
“She’s an idiot!” Lorna exclaimed. “And this is the type of thing I would expect from someone like her.”
“Well, I don’t care what she is, but I know she had better make that her last time approaching me with those crazy comments.”
“They’re giving her that job. I could tell by the smug look on her face, and even though I didn’t think Jim would stoop low enough to screw trash like her, I’m starting to think I was wrong. Just look,” she said, gazing in the direction Kelli had gone in. “Just look how giggly and close up on him she is. And look at the way Jim keeps smiling at her. It’s almost like they’ve forgotten who and where they are. Liquor will bring out the darkest of secrets if you listen and watch close enough. I know about this type of thing all too well, because I spill my own guts to anyone who will listen every time I get drunk myself.”
“If they give her that job, she’ll be at a higher level than me, because I found out today that the corporate management position is one level higher than the manufacturing one.”
“I thought you knew that.”
“I didn’t, because they conveniently left it off the job posting. Usually they always list the grade of pay, and I didn’t even think to ask because I assumed both jobs were the same in terms of grade.”
“We’ll see what happens, but if they give Kelli that job, I don’t see how you can just sit back and be happy.”
“Oh, don’t think I will for one minute.”
“Damn, Anise. When I first came over here, I was planning to ask you how it feels to be promoted, but stupid Kelli ruined the whole vibe.”
“I really don’t know how it feels. I’m happy on the one hand and discontented on another. Maybe I’ll feel fine once I’ve actually started the
job. And when I’ve seen that first paycheck.”
“That’s the best part of all. And, hey, I know I gave you a hard time about applying for this, but I want you to know that I really am happy for you. I still don’t trust those bastards, but I’m glad you finally moved into management. That’s a major accomplishment, and I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks.”
“I hate Kelli for coming over here.” Lorna frowned. “I was feeling like I could dance the whole night away, but not anymore.”
“Yeah, you looked like you were having a pretty good time out there.”
“I was. But there still aren’t any decent men in here.”
“Is there ever a time when you’re not looking for a man,” I said, sipping on my virgin raspberry margarita.
“No. Not really,” she said, sipping from a beer mug and smiling. “You know, this music is a little loud even for me.”
“I was thinking the same thing earlier.”
“Elizabeth looks so happy, doesn’t she?”
“Yes, she does. She really wants to be with her parents, and I have the utmost respect for what she is doing.”
“So do I, but I would never do it,” Lorna said. “My parents treated my brother and me like shit. We always felt like we were in their way, and I think they regretted having both of us. So when it comes time for them to be taken care of, I hope they die instantly, because otherwise I don’t know who’s going to do it.”
“That’s a terrible thing to say,” I said.
“Maybe it is, but if you knew what I went through as a child, you wouldn’t question me.”
“I guess.”
We sat and listened to the music for a few minutes, but I soon became tired of competing with it.
“I’m going to say good-bye to Elizabeth and head home,” I said.
“Not me. I’m here until everyone else leaves.”
“Figures,” I said, smiling and hugging Lorna.
“You take care, and congratulations again on the promotion.”
“Thanks.”
I walked over to the crowd standing around Elizabeth. Half my coworkers needed designated drivers, which I thought was unfortunate on a weeknight. But who was I to say one way or the other. These were grown people.
“Anise!” Elizabeth beamed. She’d fallen into the drunken category as well. “You’re not getting ready to go, are you?”
“Yeah, unfortunately I am. But I wanted to come tell you how much I’ve enjoyed working for you, and that I wish you all the best in Wisconsin.”
“Thank you and congrats again on getting that promotion. Nobody deserves it more than you. I mean that.”
“Thanks. Well, I guess I’m out of here.”
“Okay,” she said, and we embraced.
I really was going to miss her, and we were both experiencing a sentimental moment.
“You take care of yourself,” she said, releasing me.
“I will, and you do the same,” I said, and saw Frank staring at me from across the room.
I was congratulated five additional times on my way out the door. The night air felt exhilarating, and the stars shone for miles. I walked slowly, because I was tired, but partly because I was sure Frank would follow behind me. It probably wasn’t such a good idea to be seen with him with so many Reed Meyers employees on the premises, but Frank usually didn’t care about that. I took a few more steps and turned around, but he was still nowhere in sight. I even sat inside my SUV longer than necessary before starting the engine. But he never showed. I waited a while longer and drove off in disappointment. I’d resisted him for the longest time, and maybe he’d decided that it wasn’t worth all the begging he was doing and that he wasn’t going to bother me any longer. I hoped I was wrong about all of this. Because deep down, I had to admit to myself that I needed the attention he was giving me.
I drove into Greenwood Estates, circled around to the cul-de-sac and pulled into my driveway. Multiple lights beamed from each of the twelve houses in our subdivision, but the area was still darker than I liked.
I continued into the garage and then into the house, but like every other time I didn’t come straight home from work, I forgot about the mail. I took off my blazer and laid it at the bottom of the staircase. Then I opened the front door, preparing to walk out to the mailbox, but stopped when I saw a huge bouquet of red roses right by the door.
I didn’t bother going to get the mail, but brought the flowers inside. I opened the tiny envelope and pulled out the card, which said: “Congratulations on your promotion. We’re all so proud of you. The training department at Reed Meyers.”
What a nice gesture, I thought to myself, smiling.
But I was a bit confused, because I still didn’t know who’d sent them. Lorna would have signed her own name and probably would have sent them during the day so I could enjoy them at work. No, without a doubt, this was something a man would do. Which meant it had to be Frank. Although, it didn’t make a whole lot of sense for him to send me flowers and then keep his distance at the club. However, if it was him, I was glad he hadn’t signed his name on the card. I couldn’t help but wonder what David would have said had he been here to receive these. I mean, what if he’d casually dropped by for some reason? I knew that wasn’t the case, but I had always been a what-if kind of person. I always worried about what might or could be, because it was better to be too cautious rather than terribly sorry.
I took the flowers into the kitchen, removed the wrapping, put them in a vase and set them on the island. They were absolutely beautiful, and I was glad the heat hadn’t wilted them. Maybe they hadn’t been delivered until late, because I didn’t see how they could look so bright and alive when they’d been left outside.
I walked through the bedroom and into the master bath and filled the double Jacuzzi with bubbles and hot water. When it was ready, I undressed, stepped in, turned the jets on medium, closed my eyes and sighed with relief. This almost felt better than sex. Almost. Well, maybe not almost, but it would suffice for tonight, because there was nothing else. With the exception of the last time David and I had made love, which was now weeks ago, I couldn’t remember how long it had been or when I’d actually wanted to. We’d never been all that compatible, and he wasn’t the most attentive lover. I’d tried to have an orgasm while we had intercourse, but it never worked. Fifty percent of the problem had to do with him coming too quickly and the other fifty percent had to do with the same reason. He wasn’t fond of foreplay, and when I suggested the idea of oral sex, he’d told me to forget it. He’d said it was filthy and unnatural, and that as much as he loved me, he would never be able to do it. I’d been disappointed, because I still remembered how good it felt with my boyfriend from college. Lorna had told me that every white man she’d been with had taken care of her without any instructions, and I’d heard the same thing before from another white girlfriend of mine. Black men were funny about things like that, though. Not all of them, because some of them knew how to sex you up so well that you thought you were floating on Mars. But there were those few who basically got what they wanted and rolled over in a coma.
I leaned back in the tub and thought about Frank. I wondered if he was still at the club and why he hadn’t tried to communicate with me. Maybe I wondered about these things because I felt so alone. The house was too quiet, and even though David and I hadn’t been all that happy, it still felt good knowing someone else lived here. I tried not to think about Frank—I even tried not to want to think about him. But I just couldn’t help it. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to be with him. I wanted to know what it was like to be held by him. I wanted to know what it was like to be with someone who seemed to really care for me. I didn’t know if his obsession was a good thing or not, because sometimes he came on a bit too strong, but I loved the way he gazed at me. I loved the attention he showered on me. I was beginning to realize how much I wanted him to drop by my office. I even looked forward to seeing him in the break room, and almost enjoyed hearing
him beg me out to dinner. But the way he’d acted at the party was so unlike him, almost as if he’d given up, and now I was feeling anxious.
I tried to relax my muscles, nerves and mind for a half hour longer, and then I drained the Jacuzzi, dried myself off and did all the other things I did after taking a nice long bath. I removed one of my short silk gowns from the dresser, pulled it over my head, folded back the comforter on the bed and fluffed two pillows, one after the other. I turned on the television and satellite and did my usual scanning, but when I didn’t see anything, I searched for the continuous jazz channel and left it there. I lay in bed staring at the ceiling, and as much as I tried not to, I thought about Frank. I knew he’d been the one to send me those flowers, and I had a mind to call him. I didn’t know if he was listed, but I knew directory assistance could tell me one way or the other. Which they did.
“Hello, Frank? It’s Anise.”
“I know.”
“I hope it’s okay that I’m calling.”
“It’s fine. Did you get the flowers?”
“Yes. And that’s why I’m calling, to thank you.”
“You’re quite welcome. And I hope you don’t mind that I sent them to your home.”
“No, not at all.”
“I figured you might get too many questions if I’d sent them to you at work.”
“I’m sure I would have.”
I waited for him to say something else, but he didn’t.
“Well, I guess I’ll let you go, but thanks again for the roses” was all I could say, because he sounded so distant. I was starting to feel nervous.
“You took the time to find my number, and now you’re already going to hang up?”
“Well, yeah. Because you don’t sound like you’re in the mood for talking.”
“It’s not that, but I began wondering today if I was bothering you so much that you were getting irritated with me. So when I saw you at the club, I figured I would leave you alone.”
“It’s not that you’re bothering me, it’s just that this whole thing is awkward considering the circumstances.”
A Taste of Reality Page 14