“The guide who led the white-water rafting trip was exceptional,” Logan commented as he continued his discussion with the fundraising guru on Saturday evening.
Then Logan glanced at Gina, their gazes lingered and she felt anticipation building between them.
Last evening hadn’t gone as planned. After they’d landed in Houston in the late afternoon, Daniel had to be acclimated and settled in. Logan had reserved a suite for Daniel and Hannah and an adjoining room for Gina and himself…to enjoy more privacy. But last night Daniel hadn’t wanted to go to sleep, so they’d ended up playing with him and watching TV until it was time to turn in. Even then, however, he’d wanted his father. So Logan had wheeled the crib into his room and he and Gina had just snuggled while his son slept.
Now happy excitement danced in her stomach as she looked forward to her time with Logan tonight…dancing…and making love later.
Dr. Katz, the guru, targeted Gina now. “Have you ever been white-water rafting on the Colorado River?”
“I’ve never been white-water rafting,” she had to admit, considering the fact that being with Logan now was so different from when they were teenagers and she’d worried about fitting in with his crowd.
“Gina has skied in Vermont, though,” Logan interjected, giving her arm a squeeze.
“What part of Vermont?” Katz questioned her.
“Killington.”
“Did you enjoy it?”
He was in his fifties and his heavy brows almost came together in the middle of his forehead. She was beginning to realize his gruffness was just part of who he was and didn’t reflect on her. “I did enjoy it, but I like horseback riding more.”
The gentleman across from Gina, Dr. Silverstein, pushed his silver-rimmed glasses higher on his nose and addressed her. “Logan mentioned you worked with his son.”
Meetings all day had involved PowerPoint presentations on the effectiveness of certain treatments and the difficulty of treating a pregnant woman. Introductions had been made, but Gina had listened more than she’d interacted with anyone there. But Logan had been involved in several private conversations.
It pleased her that Logan had spoken about her time with Daniel. “I work with babies who have developmental issues,” she explained.
“You have a degree in child development?” Dr. Silverstein asked with interest.
“I have a master’s in pediatric physical therapy as well as a Ph.D. in infant and toddler development.”
“Who do you work for?” Silverstein wanted to know.
“I work for myself. I have a practice called Baby Grows in Lubbock.”
“That’s very interesting.” The doctor looked thoughtful. “There’s such a need for that kind of practice with all kinds of children—children with Downs, with epilepsy. Children who have been in accidents.”
“She’s published articles,” Logan said proudly. “If you search the Internet, you’ll find them.” He folded his napkin, laid it on the table and pushed his chair back. Standing, he said, “I think I’m going to ask my beautiful companion to dance with me before the band stops playing.”
Logan’s gaze lingered on her as if he’d been waiting for this dance all night. Whenever he looked at her like that, she felt so special…so pretty. She’d worn a black dress with a white bow on her left shoulder, no sleeve on the right. Sterling jewelry sparkled at her ears and around her neck. She’d never felt more self-confident…or appreciated.
Logan helped her with her chair and then swept her away to the dance floor. There he pulled her close.
“I’m not ready to sacrifice any more time for mingling and conversation. Last night should have been different. We should have had some time to ourselves.”
“Logan, when a child is involved every situation is in flux.”
His green eyes were gentle as he studied her face. “You can understand that with your head, but do you understand it with your heart?”
“I do,” she assured him, her lips almost touching his jaw. “I loved you holding me last night. That was enough.”
“Tonight will be different. Hannah took Daniel down to the kids’ area before supper. I looked in on him while you were getting dressed. His eyes were almost closing over his dinner.”
“We’re good as long as we don’t get any storms,” she teased.
“No storms tonight. I checked the weather report.”
The weather outside might be perfectly calm, but she could see the hunger building inside Logan. The simmering intensity in his eyes told her he wanted to give way to it. She wished he would. She wished he wouldn’t continue to hold back with her. But she sensed he wasn’t just holding back his passion, he was holding back part of his soul, too. Tonight she wanted to give herself to Logan completely. She wanted him to realize that he could depend on her and trust her, that she wouldn’t turn her back on him again.
The music was smooth and dreamy. They gazed into each other’s eyes, searching for answers that maybe they could find tonight.
Logan moved his hand to the small of her back. When he did, her breasts pressed into his chest. As she laid her face against the lapel of his suit jacket, she inhaled his cologne, anticipated what was to come and felt the excitement heat her whole body.
Logan’s lips were close to her ear. “Do you feel it, too?”
“The music?” she teased, looking up at him.
“Gina,” he murmured in part exasperation and part amusement.
She knew she had to be the one to say it because he wasn’t going to push her into feelings or into physical pleasure if she didn’t want to go there. “Yes, I feel it. I feel you. I’m ready to get naked if you are.”
He laughed.
She realized she could be provocative with him as well as share pleasure with him. She could be the girl she’d been at eighteen.
Bending to her, he kissed the shell of her ear and she felt his tongue on her earlobe. Shivers danced up and down her arms. She wanted to kiss him long and hard, but not in the middle of the dance floor, not with these people who respected and admired him and expected propriety.
She leaned back and warned with mock sternness, “If you don’t want me to undress you right here, you’d better stop teasing.”
“No, what I’d better do is take you up to our room.” With that he stopped the pretense of dancing, wrapped his arm around her and guided her back to their table. Fortunately everyone was mingling, talking or dancing, so they didn’t have to make excuses. They just slipped out of the room and headed for the elevator.
The sounds of the hotel lobby were background noise as they stood at the bank of elevators glancing at each other. Gina’s heart was racing and she wondered if Logan’s was, too. But it was impossible to read him. He was so good now at hiding what he was feeling.
She just wished he’d talk to her about what was ahead of them…about the future. They hadn’t had much time together this past week. Both had had full schedules. Logan had called her mid-week before bed, but it had been a short call and she’d wondered if he wanted to avoid talking about the future.
When the elevator doors opened, they stepped inside. Alone now, Logan enfolded her into his arms. She forgot about the future, caught up in right now. Logan kissed her. His mouth was more demanding, more possessive than it had been before. He broke off the kiss to look at her, checking if she was okay.
“Don’t treat me as if I’m going to break,” she pleaded. “I want you, Logan. I want us.”
His expression was tender as he said, “I’m afraid I’ll trigger something.”
She knew what he meant and she didn’t know how to reassure him except to say, “You are not that man. My mind, my heart, my body and my soul know that. Please, don’t hold back with me tonight.” She hoped he understood she wanted to give herself to him completely, and she wanted him to do the same in return.
At their floor he curled his arm around her as if he didn’t want to let her go. After he opened the room door with his key card, he
brushed his hand down her cheek and said, “I’ll be right back. I’m going to check on Daniel.”
Gina had barely had enough time to undress when he returned from the adjoining suite. “He’s sound asleep.”
Logan shed his suit jacket and tie and began unbuttoning the buttons on his shirt, his gaze focused on her.
She’d donned a satiny nightgown in swirls of pink and yellow. As she moved toward the bed, she could feel the spaghetti straps slipping slightly, the material molding to her.
His hands stilled on the placket of his shirt and he watched her as if she were a mirage which might disappear in the blink of the eye. “You’re beautiful,” he said hoarsely. “I want you so much my hands are shaking.”
Crossing to him, she took his hands in hers, opened one and kissed his palm.
When her lips touched his skin, tension rippled from him to her. Their gazes locked. Not hesitating, she pulled his shirt from his trousers. Logan tugged her close for a impetuously erotic kiss that told her exactly how much he wanted her. Excited, thrilled to be with him again, she kissed him back, needing him to know how much she wanted him, how much she loved him.
The feelings welling up in her heart were no surprise. Logan had been there all these years. He was the man she’d always envisioned spending her life with. He was the man who could put the past truly in the past.
When he broke off the kiss, he ran lighter kisses down her neck to the pulse at her throat. His hands caressed her back and he began to lift her nightgown in handfuls. After he slid it over her head and tossed it aside, a ruddy flush darkened his cheekbones.
He mumbled, “I’ve got to get out of these clothes.”
Moments later they were lying in bed. Logan stroked her face, gently kissed her lips and lingered on her breasts. His tongue teased her nipples until she was pulling at his shoulders, almost begging him to enter her. But he didn’t. His hand gently reached between her thighs, his fingers sliding in and out of her, doing wonderful fluttery things that made her feel as if she were going to fly apart.
“Do you want to be on top?” he asked when she was practically senseless with desire.
“No. I want you on top, all over me, inside me.” She closed her eyes.
But his deep voice coaxed them open again. “Look at me, Gina. Look at me and know I only want to give you pleasure.”
Tears came to her eyes—because she was so sure of that, so absolutely sure Logan would never hurt her.
He rose above her, his gaze locked to hers. When he entered her, all the pleasure in the world seemed to be theirs. It filled her heart. It filled her body. And it filled the room. Logan and the sensual sensations rippling through her burned away the past and healed any part of her that still held pain. She felt whole again. She let go of herself and flew to the stars with Logan.
His release came as the tremors of her orgasm still washed through her, as she held on to him and murmured his name.
Stretched out on top of her, he dropped his head to her shoulder. When he rolled them onto their sides, still joined, she snuggled into his chest as he kissed her temple. They fell asleep holding on to each other.
A few hours later, still tucked into Logan’s arms, Gina awakened. She relived making love with Logan—every detail, every wonderful sensation. Suddenly, however, her breath caught. She realized something she hadn’t given any consideration to a few hours before. They hadn’t used birth control! They’d been so caught up in each other and the moment that it hadn’t even entered their minds.
The hush of night was veiled by the hum of the air conditioner. Logan’s chest hair brushed her cheek, his scent surrounded her and she felt as if she’d been born to be held in his arms. What if they’d made a baby last night?
What if she was carrying his child?
Gina closed her eyes again, embracing the idea, perhaps even hoping for it.
But would Logan feel the same?
The sun was just peeking through the draperies when Gina opened her eyes the following morning. Logan had moved away from her during the night. She reached out a hand before she turned and felt his muscled arm. Then she shifted to her side to look at him.
He was lying on his back, one arm tucked under his head as he stared at the ceiling. Something was different and she suspected what it was. After all, Logan was as pragmatic as he was passionate.
“Good morning,” she said lightly, hoping he’d come to the same conclusion she had about a pregnancy.
“I’m not sure about that,” he said, sitting up, pushing pillows behind him and hiking himself up against the headboard.
He was out of reach now and she felt the distance emotionally as well as physically.
“My condoms are still in the suitcase,” he said wryly.
“I know.”
“You mean you thought of them and you didn’t say anything?”
Now she quickly sat up, too. “No, of course not. I woke up in the middle of the night and that’s when I realized it. Logan, why would you think I wouldn’t say anything?”
“I shouldn’t have said that,” he muttered. “Of course you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t want to be pregnant any more than I’d want you to be pregnant. You’ve got a career, a practice.”
“Yes, I do. But I wouldn’t look on a baby as an awful thing happening. I mean, a child would be something wonderful, wouldn’t it?”
His silence wasn’t the answer she wanted, and she realized that last night might have been something different to her than to him.
Finally he said, “You really sound as if you might want a baby.”
Not any baby. Your baby. But she decided to keep that comment to herself.
Looking troubled, he assured her, “If you were to get pregnant, you don’t have to worry. I’ll support you.”
He would support her. She was afraid to ask what that meant. Did he mean monetarily? Did he mean emotionally?
She simply said, “I appreciate that,” and slid out of the bed. Without another glance at him, she hurried into the bathroom. She needed to take a few deep breaths before she said something she couldn’t take back…before she said something she’d regret almost as much as she regretted leaving him when she was eighteen.
She was brushing her teeth when Logan rapped on the door. “I’m going to check on Daniel.”
“Okay,” she murmured around her toothbrush.
“Will you be ready to go down to breakfast in about half an hour?”
She took the toothbrush out of her mouth and swallowed. Wiping her mouth with a towel, she said clearly, “I think I’m going to skip breakfast and pack. I’ll order something from room service, then we’ll meet back here in time to leave for the airport.”
He opened the door, then stepped inside.
She’d put on the white, fluffy robe the hotel provided, and right now she was grateful for it.
“Gina, about the birth control—the possibility of you being pregnant just threw me for a loop.”
His green eyes were turbulent with emotions she didn’t understand or know anything about. “Why?”
He seemed to debate with himself then said, “When Amy told me she was pregnant, I thought it was the happiest moment of my life. But then a few months later everything went to hell. Just thinking about the idea brought it all back.”
“I can see how it would,” she said softly, grateful he was sharing this with her, thankful he wasn’t closing himself off to her.
Logan had pulled on jeans and a snap-button shirt. His tall, hard body seemed to fill the bathroom. She remembered how his body had covered hers, how he’d kissed her, how he’d touched her. And she wanted last night back. She hated this tension between them. She wished he’d hold her.
But he didn’t. He just asked again, “Are you sure you don’t want breakfast?”
“Positive,” she said with a smile she didn’t feel.
“All right. I’ll meet you back here in a little while.”
She stood perfectly still, unable to go to him.
He seemed unable to move toward her.
He left the bathroom and closed the door behind him.
Gina gripped the sink, took a couple of deep breaths, then shed the robe and stepped into the shower. The hot water was soothing and she let it wash over her, trying not to think…trying to deny the fact that Logan might not be ready for a new relationship. He might not be ready for her to be an integral part of his life.
Fifteen minutes later, she’d toweled off and dressed when the phone in her room rang. She picked it up, thinking it might be Logan.
“Dr. Rigoletti?” a male voice asked.
“Yes, this is she.”
“Good morning. It’s Dr. Silverstein. We spoke briefly at dinner last night.”
She remembered the man. He had kind eyes and silver wire-rimmed spectacles. “Yes, Dr. Silverstein, I remember. Do you want to speak to Logan?”
“No, actually I’d like to meet with you for a few minutes. Is this a good time?”
She checked her watch. “I have a few minutes.”
“My room is down the hall from yours. There’s a sitting area at the end of the hall. Shall we meet there?”
Gina’s radar had told her she’d have nothing to fear from Dr. Silverstein, so she didn’t hesitate to say, “Sure. I’ll meet you there in five minutes.”
Gina had dressed in white jeans and a navy knit top. Now she quickly slipped into sandals and stopped long enough to dab some gloss on her lips. After picking up her purse, she let the hotel-room door close behind her and went down the hall.
Dr. Silverstein was standing at the windows that looked out over the city. “I’m grateful that you could give me a few minutes.”
“What’s this about?” she asked, puzzled, as they both took a seat.
“I searched your credentials and work history on the Internet last night. They’re very impressive.”
“I feel as if I’m interviewing for something,” she said, joking.
“Not interviewing exactly, but I did wonder if you do any consultation work…if you do any outside training.”
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