“Keep it down, Danny,” he whispered, wincing as even his voiceless breath carried on the wind.
“Hah, that’s what she said!” Danny cried instead, doubling over with more laughter. Perhaps Danny was here because of the cognac. His company was certainly not because a lack of female companionship at home. In fact, Lizzie would have their heads when they came back, clothes clinging to their damp bodies, clearly engaging in amusements without her.
Jason took a step into the water, grateful that it was cold, grateful that the shivers pushed thoughts of Diana from his mind.
But then the water lapped at his thigh, sweetly, gently, and he remembered her mouth.
His feet went out from under him and it took only a moment to realize what Daniel had done, kicking him at the knees to buckle his legs and dunk him wholly in the water. It was the sort of sport his friend had done when they were schoolboys.
Jason went under, his arms flailing, and for a brief poetic moment he thought, How apt, this is exactly how she makes me feel.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Swimming naked?” Diana laughed. Jason was willing to tell her every story of his youthful indiscretions if it would keep her making that rippling sound that sent such sensations over his skin. It was almost as if she had caressed him.
They were taking tea in one of the parlors of the Air Street house. It was not a large room, but Jason thought it well furnished, especially since the sofa he sat on was only just wide enough to accommodate two people. From such a near distance he could catch the faint scent of the rose fragrance Diana favored.
“Daniel didn’t want to admit it,” Lizzie continued, “but really, when one’s husband comes back in the middle of the night, his hair plastered to his skull and stinking of cognac, a wife wonders where he’s been.”
“I swear, my love,” Daniel said, “we’ll take you next time. It was impromptu, and of course, my dear, you’d never want to see Blount’s scrawny self in his altogether. You’d finally have to admit that I am the finest specimen of manhood to walk this earth.”
“That would suggest before now I thought he was. No offense, Jas.”
“Am I not?” Jason directed his question to Diana. She laughed. That delightful, throaty sound that sent pleasurable shivers through his body.
“And how would I judge such a thing?” Her head was tilted down and forward and she looked at him sideways. “Perhaps you could take me swimming tonight?”
He heard his friends laughing even as he spoke. “I would but I’ve assured Mrs. Throckmorton that if I ever do anything remotely scandalous, she won’t hear of it.”
“I’ve a wager on it actually,” Lizzie agreed, “so please, make sure it is a full moon when you go.”
A while later, Jason saw Diana to her carriage, and after he’d assisted her up, she leaned out and took his hand, stroking his bare palm with her gloved fingers. Ridiculous that such a small touch could make him harden instantly.
“Jason,” she said, softly, “I don’t need a swimming assignation to know I very much look forward to seeing you…altogether.”
Then she released his hand and the footman closed the carriage door.
Jason stepped back, clenching his hand into fist. As he watched the carriage roll forward slowly, he wanted to fling open the door and join her inside. Privacy—an hour, an afternoon—alone with her was what he wanted. Not these teasing moments that left him aching and dreaming of her.
But he’d see Diana tonight at the assembly. They would think of something.
When he returned to the sitting room, Lizzie and Daniel were still where he had left them, lounging. Only, they’d broken out a bottle of brandy. Jason accepted a glass readily.
“You know, Jas,” Lizzie said, thoughtfully. “I rather like Lady Blount.”
“Do you?” He wondered what Lizzie would think if she knew everything about Diana. She’d probably be amused, he realized.
“Yes, I do,” Lizzie reaffirmed. “She has a bit of a reputation, for lovers and all, and it does seem as though she’s now chosen you.” Here she stared at Jason expectantly, as if he’d confirm or deny that, or reveal details of his sexual activities. He managed to keep his expression impassive. “Well, in any event, I think she’s exactly what you need. And for the record, I don’t think she’s nearly as fast as her reputation suggests.”
Jason almost choked on his wine. Really, if Lizzie only knew.
“She’s exceedingly polite, and kind. Doesn’t put on any airs…”
“She’s a veritable paragon,” Daniel broke in with a teasing grin. “Come now, love, and leave the poor man alone. He’ll think you’re trying to sell him a wife.”
“I’m not doing that,” Lizzie protested. “Anyway, you know what they say about love, Jas. In order to be right, it must be wrong.”
“Is that what they say, love?” Daniel teased, but Jason was still thinking about the last thing his friend had said.
A paragon? No. Yet as Lizzie had pointed out, despite Diana’s fast reputation, there was nothing exceptional about her at all. Nothing but all the delightful qualities that made her her.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Nothing was negligible, Diana decided later that evening as she entered the Castle Tavern’s assembly rooms for the evening’s dressed ball. She knew she looked as elegant as she ever did, her brown Italian crepe dress trimmed with gold thread and the circlet of gold and yellow topaz in her artfully arranged hair designed to catch the candlelight. The majority of male eyes were trained on her, observing her progress down into the ballroom with that very delicious sort of masculine approval. But for all those eyes, her own gaze swept the room for one pair of blue. Nothing was negligible—for the past two days, try as she might to snuff it, the insidious idea of marriage stuck.
She had hated being married. She had despised having to answer to any man, to do what he wished and please him. Or to please the men Roger had chosen for her, as it had turned out to be.
Of course a marriage to someone like Jason would not be that way. There was something between them, in their relationship, that she valued very much: respect. And that was the truly insidious idea.
Jason was there already, catching her searching gaze immediately from his position near the wall not ten feet from the entrance. He looked splendid, from the top of his golden hair to his impeccable white waistcoat, the gold buttons on his neat dark blue coat to his nankin breeches and blue dancing slippers.
Diana didn’t bother to dissemble, to make any sort of circuit of the room before seeking him out. Clearly, he had the same idea, because he met her halfway, or what should have been halfway, as his long strides ate up far more of the ten feet than her own.
“You like to arrive late,” he murmured, tucking her arm into his.
“I’m not even fashionably late,” Diana countered. “I was far too eager for this night to come.” She shot him a sidelong glance. And was met with his own, with the wintry gray-blue of his eyes. Her breath hitched and she wet her lips quickly. She found it difficult to remember there was an orchestra playing and a ballroom full of people around them.
“I confess to the same,” Jason admitted. “Lizzie and Throckmorton refused to come as early as I wished.”
Diana laughed. It wasn’t her usual throaty sound, it was far more giddy. How embarrassing, she thought, just before she caught his expression, staring at her as if he liked the novelty.
“You’re blushing,” he observed, as if it were some sort of wondrous, rare thing. Perhaps it was.
They danced together, and when they didn’t dance, they strolled about the room, or lingered by a window. When Earnestina came by to say that she, Ash and Tiptain were leaving, Jason offered to take Diana home in his carriage.
“Now, I’ll finally have you to myself,” Jason whispered, leaning close to her when Earnestina had departed.
“What, are you planning to kidnap me?” she returned, half hoping he’d give her some enticing reason why she shouldn’t simpl
y return to the Ashburtons’ house.
But when they finally climbed into his carriage, a two-seat open phaeton, there was no privacy and Diana shot Jason a mocking look.
“So much for alone.”
“Poor planning, I admit,” he said with chagrin. “But tomorrow, tomorrow you’re mine, all day. I’ll show you just how well I can plan.”
“I think I can arrange that,” she agreed.
They weren’t going very far; if they had walked they could have traversed the distance in far less time, but the east sea frontage road didn’t connect to the west and they had to take a longer, more circuitous route.
“Do you know,” Jason said abruptly, “I never would have imagined, two years ago, standing in the solicitor’s office, that we would be here together like this. I may have wished it, but I never would have imagined.”
Diana laughed at that, because she knew exactly what he meant. Only, it was his disapproval that had kept them apart so long after his wife’s death. She sighed then, remembering: his disapproval stemmed from her own stupid pride.
“Do you know, Jason,” Diana said, wanting him to know everything, to absolve her of anything ugly, to help her start anew, “that I kept Harridan House because of you?”
“You’re blaming me for that?” he stared at her disbelieving.
“Jason, please, I’m not trying to blame you, I’m trying to confide, to explain…Not because of you, that isn’t really fair, but because of my own stupid pride. Finally, I was independent, able to make my own choices, and then you and Mr. Jarvis were there, trying to make them for me.”
“You would have sold the place?” Jason stared at her.
“Yes, I believe I would have, but we’ll never really know.”
“And now?”
“I’m, I’m rather tired of the life, Jas. I’m still young, I could still have a family, be a mother…Maybe there is something more to all of this than just sex?”
“Why are you telling me this?”
She looked away, uncertain, embarrassed, she had made an assumption. Oh, not that they would marry, hardly that, but that…but that this affair might be a longer one, might eventually hold some more emotion than simply the scalding brand of desire.
He kissed her, softly, tenderly, sweetly, ignoring that they were exposed to the view of anyone they might pass by. It was completely unlike the hard passion they’d shared in the past. As if he cherished her.
Which was a laughable thought, so she thrust it away to concentrate on the taste of him, on the light touch of his lips on hers.
Then it deepened. The fire came coursing through her veins and blanketing her skin, everything in her rising to meet him.
The kiss was everything all at once, the desperate and the tender, the sweet and the relentless. Every experience in her life up until that moment bound itself into that kiss until she felt that he knew her, he knew her from every little corner of her being.
When he finally pulled away, he looked as unsteady as she felt.
“Perhaps,” he began, “perhaps we both misjudged each other. Perhaps, we’ve been given another chance here, for a different life, for new choices.”
“That’s what I want,” Diana said, intently. “I’m ready for a new beginning.”
Diana allowed Jason to assist her down from the carriage. The feel of his hands on her body was the slightest pressure and then it was gone and the earth stood solid beneath her feet. In silence he escorted her the few short steps to the already open door where the butler stood, illuminated by candlelight. Her pulse still ran like a thoroughbred making for the finish line; her mouth still tingled from the pressure of his lips. And then he lifted her gloved hand and brushed it with the barest kiss. Then, that too was over. She took a step toward the house, then paused on the threshold. She couldn’t stop herself from looking back, from wanting one more glimpse of him.
From the darkness of the night she could make out the white of his eyes, meeting hers. There was a promise there, a promise for tomorrow. Feeling like the young girl she hadn’t been for years, she yearned for what tomorrow would bring.
She entered the house when the stamping of the impatient horses and the cough of the impatient butler were too insistent.
Inside, the sickly sweet smell assaulted her almost immediately, wafting down the staircase. So they were smoking opium again.
When she reached the first floor, she paused at the open doorway of the sitting room. Inside, as usual, her friends lounged, with hardly a care for elegant positioning of limbs, the proper way to sit in a chair, or that the floor was not a fashionable place to lie down. She wondered briefly what the staff thought of their little group, of the dissipated evenings.
Tiptain spied her and lifted a hand in greeting. “Finally the lady has returned. Let the festivities begin.”
“You must be in great pain, Colonel,” Diana murmured ironically.
“I may have started it for the pain, Lady Blount, but I continue for the visions. Such a lovely life it is.” Tiptain’s glazed eyes didn’t focus on her, but he leaned heavily toward Earnestina, passing her the pipe. Tina took it, sucking deeply.
“Join us, Di,” Ash pleaded, half rising from the sofa to reach for her.
“Another time,” she murmured, backing up into the cold marble hall.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Despite the long day, despite the hours of dancing, sleep eluded Diana. She lay in bed, her eyes open, studying the furniture that loomed in the dark as large shapes, just barely differentiated from the other shadows.
She was too wound up with thoughts of Jason. Maybe, maybe if she just spent some of this excess energy…
Diana pulled off her nightgown and tossed it away. She lay back on the bed, closed her eyes and ran her hands down over her body. What had Jason said? He’d place his hand over her breast, enjoy the weight of it? Diana cupped herself in her hands, kneading the flesh, imagining it was him.
She circled her nipples with her index finger slowly, letting the sensations awaken and then she tugged on the hard peaks till she could feel the touch in the growing heat of her pussy.
She ran her right hand down to her hip, the palm firm on her flesh, grasping at the curves of her body.
How would he feel inside her? She’d know soon. Perhaps tomorrow or the day after; when the time was right, she would know.
She moved her hand between her thighs, skimming over the tight curls, holding herself, enjoying the pressure of her hand. Then she slipped her third finger between the plump lips, into the slick moisture within.
She gasped at the feel of it, at the sharp sympathetic pang in her nipples. She wanted to be filled, but this wasn’t Harridan House, she didn’t have any of her usual toys, she couldn’t simulate the feeling of a man.
So she settled for a release of the tight knot of tension. She caught her clit between her fingers, massaging the little muscular nub, imagining it was Jason licking her, Jason’s hand still kneading her breast.
She played, keeping herself from orgasm, the speed of her fingers slowing every time she neared the peak.
What was he doing in the bathing machine when this one was just for women? What was he doing naked and his cock jutting out so hard, so appealing she just wanted to take it in her mouth? Diana could hear the gasp of all the other women as she fell to her knees and hungrily sucked on him.
He was so delicious, so firm in her mouth, she couldn’t get enough. But he pushed her away, down to her back, lifting up her skirts. Yes, she wanted this too. She wanted him to fuck her, finally. Finally.
His cock slid into her and she pushed back against him, wanting him to come in deep, but she couldn’t get what she wanted, she could hardly feel his body in her hands. It kept moving, almost as if he were just his cock, pumping into her.
But then he sucked on her ear and it brought her so close that she moaned and wrapped her legs around his hips.
It was so good. Too good. Finally.
She’d known it wo
uld be this way with Jason. She’d known from the first moment she’d seen him.
He kissed her, his mouth over hers, and there was a faint scent in the air that she couldn’t identify as they lay outside in the field, the red flowers everywhere pulling at her memory, tugging at her.
She clawed her way awake.
It wasn’t a dream. There was a man, here, laboring above her, his breath hot against her ear, his cock thrusting hard and rhythmically between her legs, into her. God it felt good to have a man again.
But this wasn’t Jason. It was Ash.
She moved to push him away but her body was too far gone, she was reaching the crest, the sensations peaking, and she cried out with the pleasure of it.
“I knew it would be this way with you, Di,” he moaned against her, pushing, thrusting until he stiffened and she felt the flood of his seed within her, the softening of his cock, the easing of his breath.
“Ash?” she whispered, disgust and fear growing in her belly, rising up toward her throat.
He kissed her neck, moving his hips against her.
“Ash,” she said again. “Please get off of me.”
But he was hard inside her again, grunting, and as his lips moved to her chin she could smell the opium on his breath.
She might have expected this sort of thing in her life at Harridan House, but not as Lady Blount. Not under the man’s own roof.
She pushed harder.
“That’s it, Di,” he said, thickly, “move with me.”
“Stop it, Ash!” When pushing at his shoulders and kicking the heels of her feet against his shin achieved nothing, she raked her nails across his skin.
“My tigress,” he murmured.
It was useless. In this position, sprawled beneath him, he was immovable.
And why should she bother? It wasn’t as if she had never had sex, was some sort of missish girl. He’d be over soon enough.
Soon enough wasn’t good enough, not with him pushing into her again and again as if she were just her cunt, just there for his cock, taking away any control she had ever had over her body, over her life.
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