Sarah looked confused. “Huh?”
“My grandmother was creative like you,” Anna explained. “She was very good with her hands, and she liked making pretty things with beads and embellishments, like the native cape that’s hanging in the living room. Do you think that’s pretty?”
Sarah nodded.
“And I remember my grandmother telling me that we should imitate the birds and flowers.”
“What do you mean?”
“She knew that Jesus had said we should be like the birds and flowers in that we shouldn’t worry about clothes and food because God provides for us. But my grandmother took it a bit further. She used to say that we should imitate the birds and flowers by wearing colorful clothes, pretty like petals and feathers. She said that was like complimenting God on his fine workmanship. Because we were imitating God’s creativity.”
Sarah’s mouth twisted to one side as if she was mentally chewing on this. “So you don’t think it’s wicked to look pretty then?”
“Do you think birds and flowers are sinful?”
“No, of course not.”
“Yet they are pretty. So why should people be any different?”
“I don’t know . . .” Sarah looked down at her patchwork dress, fingering a section of floral fabric.
“And your dress is pretty,” Anna told her.
Sarah looked up with troubled eyes. “This dress caused a fight and Daniel said that it was because of vanity. And that vanity is wicked. And wickedness must be punished.”
Anna thought she didn’t care much for this Daniel fellow. “But you still wear this dress,” she said quietly. “Do you think that means you’re wicked?”
Sarah shrugged.
“I think I would define wickedness the same way I define sin. It’s doing something that hurts you or someone else or doing something that comes between you and God.”
“Like vanity,” Sarah said.
“Well, I guess I’d have to agree that vanity isn’t a good thing sometimes. Especially if people get too caught up in outward appearances.” Anna remembered how Lauren and Eunice used to be sometimes. She certainly didn’t wish that for Sarah. “I don’t think too much focus on one’s self and one’s appearance is healthy.”
“Do you think it’s wicked?”
“I suppose it could be if it hurt you or someone else,” Anna admitted. “Now I have a question for you, Sarah. Do you remember how you used to feel when you created a special piece of clothing?”
Sarah nodded slowly. “Yeah . . . I felt pretty good.”
“You enjoyed creating something pretty, didn’t you?”
She nodded again.
“Did that seem wicked or evil to you?”
“No . . . I guess not.”
Clark was slowing down the engine and easing the boat up to the dock. Anna wanted to say more, but at the same time, she wanted to be careful not to say too much. She knew that Sarah was processing a lot right now . . . and Anna didn’t want to interfere with it. All this talk of wickedness and vanity was very illuminating. The commune Sarah had left behind obviously had some strange religious roots.
Anna had heard stories of various communes where “spiritual” leaders would concoct their own brand of religion in order to keep the members under their control. Anna suspected that Daniel had been a leader like that. It sounded as if he’d used portions of religious teachings to shackle his followers, to ensure that he kept the upper hand. He’d probably kept a pretense of caring for them but had actually crippled them instead. Like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Anna was so thankful that Sarah had escaped from that place. Now if only she could escape the twisted thinking as well.
6
Anna had reason to feel hopeful during the next week. Sarah was not only good help around the busy inn; she seemed to be happier, too. But as the weekend rolled along, Anna realized that Hazel would be home on Monday.
“I thought you might like to move back into your old room,” she told Sarah on Sunday morning. They were cleaning up after breakfast.
Sarah frowned. “My room in the house?”
Anna gave the table a last swipe. “Yes, because Hazel will be back from her trip tomorrow.”
“And she’ll want the cabin back,” Sarah said glumly.
“You used to love your room in the house,” Anna reminded her. “I remember how you’d run to it with your bags and—”
“When I was a child.”
Anna wanted to point out that Sarah wasn’t much more than that now but knew she’d take that as an insult. “I wish we had an available cabin,” Anna told her. “But we’re full up clear into September.” She knew that Clark had been considering building more cabins back toward the woods, but she’d felt they had more than enough on their hands already. Now she wished he had time to build just one more. “There’s room at Babette’s house,” she said tentatively.
“You mean where Lauren stays?”
Anna nodded as she dropped the washrag into the bucket of sudsy water. “There’s a nice spare room there and—”
“You want to shove me off onto Lauren now?” Sarah looked at Anna with wounded eyes.
“No, I wanted you to move back into your own room. But you don’t seem to want that.”
Sarah swept the last of the debris into the dustpan then dumped it in the trash. “Maybe I don’t belong here.” Anna went over to her, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Of course, you belong here, Sarah. This is your home.” She waved her hands. “Someday it will all be yours, for you and your children and grandchildren and—”
“I never want to have children,” Sarah said sharply.
Anna frowned. “Why?”
“Because this world is a horrible place to bring children into.”
Anna looked out the window toward the peaceful river. “I happen to love this world, Sarah. You used to love it, too.”
“That was before I knew how much evil there was in it.” With a grim expression, Sarah carried the broom and dustpan to the kitchen.
Anna followed her in, emptying the bucket of water into the sink. She rinsed it out then turned to look at Sarah, carefully planning her next words. “I don’t understand all that happened while you were living at the commune,” she said, “but I worry that some of the things you learned there may have been wrong.”
Sarah pressed her lips together. “I’ll admit that Daniel taught some things that sounded wrong, but not Aaron. Aaron was a good man. He was very close to God.”
Anna really didn’t want to argue about this. Mostly she wanted to resolve the question of where Sarah would stay once Hazel returned. “So . . . do you really have a problem with your old room?” she asked.
Sarah shrugged. “I’ll move back to my old room. Hazel can have the cabin.” But something in her tone still sounded hurt.
“I want to ask Clark about building some new cabins,” Anna told her. “Then you could have one of your very own. Just like Hazel.”
Sarah seemed to brighten at this. “How long would that take?”
“I’m not sure exactly. Probably a month or so. But you could ask Clark.” She turned off the light in the kitchen. “I can help you move your things into the house, if you want.”
“That’s okay. I don’t have much.”
“And I’ll ask Diane to give it a good cleaning before Hazel arrives. I think she’s not due until late in the afternoon. I thought we could have a little welcome home party for her. You know she’s retired from teaching so she’ll be living here full time from now on.”
Sarah just nodded.
“And I’ll ask Clark to get started with a cabin as soon as possible,” Anna told her.
“I told Janelle I’d help her in the kitchen this afternoon,” Sarah said. “I better go.”
Anna wanted to tell her one more thing, but she just couldn’t force the words out. Not yet. She wanted to gently warn Sarah that Lauren was due to return to work in a few days. Anna had tried to talk Lauren into taking a third week off, but
she’d insisted that she missed the inn and everyone . . . too much to stay away. “I’m already counting the days, Mom. I’m homesick,” she said sadly. “I’ve painted and cleaned and gardened, and I want to come back to work at the inn. Please, don’t banish me for another week.”
“You’re not banished, Lauren. Of course you can come back. It’s just that it’ll be a bit of a challenge. For Sarah, I mean.”
“I’ll try not to cross Sarah’s path,” Lauren promised. “I’ll probably be in the office most of the time anyway. I’m sure there’s plenty to catch up on in there.”
“Yes, and Sarah is doing better.” Anna told her about some of the clothes Sarah had created. Of course she didn’t mention Sarah’s anxiety about wearing jeans. And, really, what did it matter if she only wore dresses? “But you need to understand that she’s still not the same as before. I can tell she still needs time . . . to work things out . . . and to heal.”
“And I won’t force her to talk to me,” Lauren assured her. “I’ve thought this whole thing through, and I’m beginning to understand her feelings. Honestly, I don’t want to make things worse for her. I’ve messed up enough where she’s concerned. I realize this.”
“Good.” Anna sighed. “And somehow we’ll get through this, Lauren.”
With so much going on at the inn, caring for the multitude of guests, planning a little welcome home party for Hazel, Anna didn’t have time to be overly concerned about Sarah and Lauren’s upcoming reunion—and when worries assaulted, she simply prayed them away.
Sarah got settled in her old room, and although she didn’t seem very happy about it, she didn’t complain either. Then, while Clark took the boat downriver to fetch Hazel, they set up an old-fashioned tea party upstairs, complete with the good china, silver, and fresh flowers. Anna even made Hazel’s favorite lemon bars. But Hazel’s best surprise when she came into the room was discovering that their long-lost Sarah had been returned to them. With tear-filled eyes, Hazel hugged the girl for several minutes. “I’ve dreamed of this day,” she told her. “I knew you’d come back.”
“I stayed in your cabin while you were gone,” Sarah told her. “I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all.” Hazel patted Sarah’s cheek happily. “It’s a good place to come home to.”
“And I read some of the stories you wrote . . . the ones from my great-great-grandmother.” She smiled shyly. “I like them.”
“I like them, too,” Hazel sighed loudly. “Oh, it’s so good to be home.” She glanced around the room. “Where’s Lauren?”
Anna couldn’t help but notice Sarah’s countenance darken at the mention of her mother. “Lauren is enjoying a much-needed vacation,” Anna said quickly. “But she’ll be back on Thursday. Or perhaps you’ll want to go visit her at Babette’s house.”
Clark jumped in, changing the subject by asking Hazel about her travels, and, as a result, she began foraging through her bags. Pulling out interesting and varied artifacts and souvenirs, she enthusiastically explained where she’d found them and what they were used for.
“Oh, yes, I have something for you, Sarah. I didn’t know at the time I got it that it would be for you.” She dug down into a bag, finally pulling something wrapped in white paper. She peeled off the paper to reveal something silky and red. “But I know it’s meant for you now.” She handed it to Sarah. “It’s a kimono. Go ahead, try it on.”
They all oohed and ahhed over the elegant golden bird embroidered on the back of the beautiful garment as Sarah modeled the kimono for them. “Thank you, Hazel. I will treasure it always.”
At the end of the day, Anna felt hopeful. With Hazel back in their midst, it seemed that Sarah might actually be turning a corner in her recovery. Sarah and Hazel had always hit it off, and after dinnertime Sarah sat and drank coffee with Hazel on the upper deck, enjoying the older woman’s tales of adventure in the mysterious Orient. Not only that, but Anna thought Hazel’s presence might help distract Sarah when Lauren returned. In fact, while she was getting the coffee things set out for tomorrow morning, Anna decided to completely disclose the touchy situation to Hazel and enlist her help if needed.
“Did Mother look all right to you?” Clark asked, as they were getting ready for bed.
Anna stopped brushing her hair and peered at him. “What do you mean?”
“Well, she was animated and happy to be home, but she seemed a little gray to me.”
“Gray?”
“Her complexion seemed a little ashen.” He frowned. “Unless I imagined it.”
Anna thought about it. “She did look a bit weary. And, certainly, traveling at her age must be tiring.”
“She was awfully happy to get home. You should’ve seen her eyes light up when she saw the dock and the inn.”
“I’m so glad she’s home, Clark. I didn’t realize how much I’d missed her.”
“It was wonderful seeing her and Sarah together.”
Anna nodded, setting her hairbrush down. “It really gave me hope.” But as they got into bed, Anna knew that she’d be watching Hazel more closely tomorrow. Perhaps she was unwell. But Anna knew that the river air could change that . . . as well as some herbal teas and good wholesome food. If Hazel was ailing, it wouldn’t be long until they’d get her well again. Like Anna’s mother used to say, she’d be “right as rain.”
Anna woke early in the morning. Feeling happy and energized, she turned on the coffee, set out some things, then decided to take her canoe out. The river was misty and quiet, and other than a few fishermen, she had it to herself. Paddling upriver, she felt strong and hopeful. Life was good and getting better.
Oh, the inn was a bit demanding this time of year . . . and sometimes, like before Sarah returned to them, she sometimes felt a little overwhelmed by the work that went into keeping it running smoothly. But on days like today, silently slicing through the water, watching the sun beginning to break through the mist, observing a blue heron standing majestically in the reeds by the river, spotting an osprey diving into the smooth surface of the water and emerging with a silvery fish . . . all of this was why she loved it here.
Remembering how lonely Lauren had sounded yesterday, she decided to paddle a bit further up and pay her a visit. Hopefully she’d have coffee on. After tying the canoe next to Lauren’s boat on the dock, Anna reached her arms skyward, stretching her spine, and taking in a deep breath.
“Hello,” Lauren called from the house up above. Still wearing her bathrobe, she waved down to Anna. “Come on up!”
Anna hurried up the path to the house, admiring the gardens as she went. It was obvious that Lauren really had been busy. “The place looks great,” Anna told her.
“Come inside and see the kitchen!” Lauren exclaimed.
Anna always felt Babette’s presence in this house, and as she saw Lauren’s improvements—fresh shell pink paint, the white cabinets freshly scrubbed, and—even new white lace-trimmed curtains on the window above the sink, Anna knew Babette would approve.
“The old curtains fell apart when I washed them,” Lauren explained. “But I made these myself. They’re actually old pillowcases that I just opened up. Do you think they look okay?”
“They’re perfect,” Anna said. As they sat outside drinking coffee, Anna told her about Hazel’s arrival. “And I think she’ll come over to visit you.”
“Oh, I hope so. It’s been so lonely.”
“And Sarah really came to life when she was talking to Hazel.” She told Lauren about the red kimono.
“I’d love to see it.”
“You will,” Anna assured her. “In time.” She finished her coffee. “Speaking of time, I better get back. As you know, we’re full up, and I noticed quite a number of guests had signed up for breakfast this morning.”
Lauren frowned. “Sometimes I wonder if the time will come when we’ll have to stop offering meals.”
Anna sighed. “I know what you mean, but the family dining appeals to so many. I hate to think of quitt
ing.”
“I know, Mom, but it’s so much work. And most of the cabins have kitchenettes. Plus there’s the barbecue area Clark built. Not to mention the public kitchen in the dining room. As we get older, we might want to consider making it easier.”
Anna laughed. “Who has time to get older, darling?”
Lauren chuckled. “Well, you never seem to get older, but some of us might.”
Anna kissed her on the cheek. “We’re as young as we feel, right? And today I feel so happy that I must still be in my twenties.”
Lauren let out a little groan as she stood and rubbed her back. “Well, I spent yesterday afternoon weeding an old flowerbed out back, and I feel like I’m about a hundred years old today.”
“Don’t forget you’re on vacation,” Anna reminded her.
“And don’t forget you promised to take a vacation, too,” Lauren called as Anna started back down the hill.
“Don’t worry. Clark is already looking into it.” She waved. “Have a good day. And don’t forget to take it easy.”
“You too, Mom!”
As Anna let the river current help her downriver, she thought about Lauren’s suggestion about the dining situation at the inn. On some levels, it made sense. Certainly, they didn’t make much money off serving food. And it was a lot of work. Plus, like Lauren had pointed out, they had made enough improvements that guests could easily fix their own food if they were so inclined. However, it was a bit of a trip into town, and not all the guests felt comfortable operating boats without help. In all fairness, it wasn’t exactly easy for guests to bring in or go out for provisions. How could they fix meals without access to food? Unless . . . Anna stopped paddling as the idea materialized in her head—unless they put in a store.
A store! Suddenly Anna flashed back to her childhood, back to a time when her parents had run the only store on the river. Situated in the lower part of the house, their little store had served so many people, from locals to tourists. She remembered how fun it had been to have customers coming and going from their dock, sharing the latest news, purchasing what they needed, and sometimes even trading for items. Especially during hard times. Anna couldn’t believe she hadn’t considered this before. Of course, it made perfect sense—the inn needed a store! She paddled harder now. She couldn’t wait to tell Clark this idea.
River's End (9781426761140) Page 5