“All better.” I gently pat his bandaged cheeks.
He gives a dry laugh and pulls me between his legs, head leaned against the top of my stomach. “Thank you,” he says after a little while of silence. I am so busy running my fingers through his hair that I almost don’t hear him.
“No problem. Just duck next time someone comes at you with a chair,” I say, and he laughs, making me vibrate with glee. I tug at his hair, receiving a lovely groan of pleasure from him. “Promise to stay intact. One piece, not pieces.”
He makes a low, ghosty laughter, meeting my eyes with a dark promise of anything but what I wished. “I promise.”
“Not good enough.” I hold up my pinky and hunch over so I am square in his face.
He laughs, and I breathe in his minty breath. No traces of liquor. He smells decent, like himself, minus the liquor…Maybe he didn’t drink cause he knew he had to drive back. Smart. He knows how much I hate him drinking and driving, in general, even.
Instead of latching his own pinky around mine like a human being, he clamps his teeth around it and mumbles darkly, “Promise…”
Cheeks flushed and panties soaked, I shake my head at my crazy man. “You are a sex fiend.”
“Are you complaining?” His raspy voice makes me shudder. Literally. I blush at his smug smile.
“Shut up and come to bed with me.” I tug at his hand. I don’t have time for his sexual agenda. I have a headache, I have to be up in a few hours for the program, and I am tired.
“If you say so,” he whispers as he tucks a hair behind my ear, then smacks my butt.
I gasp. “Grey!”
“There we go, scream my name, princesa,” he says in my ear before picking me up and dropping me on the bed.
I laugh his sexual advances away and wedge myself between his strong arms, letting his large frame dwarf my smaller one. A small tingle in the pit of my stomach connected to his mysterious appearance makes me frown for a few moments. But then his soft kisses and coaxing, raspy voice lulls me to sleep. Eating that tingle away with his presence.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Thankfully my headache fades away by the time I’ve woken up. I drink one and a half cups of coffee just to get rid of any bits that were left behind. I am up earlier than Grey, as usual, drinking coffee before Matthew comes to pick me up. I would have Grey take me, but I don’t want to wake him. He must be exhausted from training and then having his head bashed in by a drunk at two in the morning. Though I kind of remember seeing his gym bag in the corner of the room…but that could easily just be a result of my fuzzy mind so early in the morning.
I scroll through car lots for a car of my own, so I can stop asking Matthew and Grey for rides. They say they don’t mind, but I do. I don’t want to use a good friend and my boyfriend constantly. I’d rather be independent instead of waiting on someone else, and drive on my own.
My father has offered me one of his many cars multiple times, but I don’t want something of his. I want my own car, bought using my own money. And I don’t mean a trust fund. That is going toward my college tuition and books. It’s such a large amount, I planned on using the rest of it for my future child. But seeing how that may not happen…I’ll just save it for a rainy day or go nuts and go book shopping.
I find a car lot about twenty minutes from here, call, and book an appointment to come by and check out the cars Monday after classes. High on my determination to be an independent adult, I text Matthew and tell him I don’t need him to pick me up anymore. He tries his hardest to argue and assure I am not putting him out of his way, but I tell him it’s fine, that I have a few things to do before leaving, which is a lie, but it was the only thing that would stop his insistent kindness. The boy’s kinder than a grandma with sweets on a Sunday afternoon, but geez!
I smile and shake my head as I ride down the elevator. I have to learn the bus routes and the works of downtown anyway. I’ll most likely be living here for a long time, not New York. It breaks my soul a little bit, but I have Grey, and I like what I’ve seen of the state so far. There aren’t any red flags or anything, so why feel bad?
It takes a bit of confusion and a lot of embarrassing conversations with Siri, but I finally end up at my destination. I step off the bus and head straight for the coffee shop. I know it’s been a while since my last cup, but I am an actual addict. One and a half cups just won’t get me through the day, especially when it’s such a gloomy one. Sunlight can barely peek through the gigantic gray clouds that threaten to unleash all hell on the day.
On the way to the shop, I feel eyes on me. I am not having a hallucination or going crazy. I just feel like I’m being watched. I take a few glances around, on the look for anyone suspicious watching me, but end up finding everyone minding their own business, briskly walking to their workplace. I try to blame it on my trouble sleeping this morning, but I just can’t shake the strangely vivid feeling. My mind tries to convince me that it’s a gang member or Dean himself, but I quickly shut down those ideas. I get an icy shiver and reassure myself otherwise. But then my creepy nightmare from last night pops into my mind, and my heart races out of control.
You are fine, Liv, I tell myself as I lean against a shoe shop, holding my chest over my erratic heartbeat. I take a few deep, controlled breaths to calm myself. I perk up and flush as people side-glance at me, wondering if I’ve lost my mind. I am honestly wondering the same thing…
I walk the rest of the way to the coffee shop with my chin raised high, as if to blatantly defy the phantom watching me. That melts away as I stand in front of the span of windows that morphs your face and body slightly, like you’re in a funhouse at a carnival. Right behind me is a tall man in a black hoodie. I can’t see his face, but he gives off a dark, menacing aura. I gasp and wheel around on my heels, only to come up with nothing. I stumble back into the windows and shake my head.
“It isn’t real. Dean isn’t coming for you. You are fine…” I murmur to myself, words tripping over myself.
“Liv,” a raspy male voice says, and a hand wraps around my wrist.
I scream in fear and remove my hands, smacking the person calling my name. Matthew.
“Oh, fudge! Geez, Liv!” he curses and rubs his left cheek while gawking at me like I’ve grown ten heads on my body. “What was that for?”
“I am so, so sorry! I didn’t see you, and I just—I—I—” I scramble for words. I rush over to him and pull his hand away, examining his red cheek, my fingers printed in his olive-colored skin. “I didn’t mean to do that. I’m sorry.”
He chuckles. “It’s okay.”
“Really?” I squeak, not believing I just hit him. But how was I supposed to know he’d sneak up on me?
“Yes.” He laughs even harder, and I breathe in relief. “As long as you buy me a coffee.”
“Of course.” I nod.
“And throw in a cookie.” He winks at me.
“No way, buddy. Now you’re pushing it.” I walk in as he holds the door open. Sweltering heat and the sweet scent of coffee brews hit my face.
“Am I? Tell that to my cheek.”
I flush as I join the rather long line. “Oh, fine.”
“Yes!” He fist pumps the air. I laugh at his silliness.
My mind wanders back to the illusion I witnessed before entering the coffee shop. What was that about? Lack of sleep? Stress, maybe? I hope it’s one of those possible factors, because I refuse to believe that my sanity has rusted off, leaving me with men in black following me and paranoia wired in my veins. I do not want to take “special” medication. I’m just seeing things; I have been for months. It will take a while before I get back to normal, years even. What I saw was nothing. Just a little illusion. Completely normal.
I’m so in my thoughts I almost collide into Matthew’s back. I bring my coffee to the side of me and stand next to him.
“Why’d you suddenly stop walking? I almost spilled my coffee.” I frown. He’s just staring ahead at nothing. I snap my fing
ers in front of his face. Nothing. Is he stuck in some trance? “What are you looking at…? Oh. Oh.” I look at where his baby-blue eyes are trained on and find Delilah talking to a girl with soft brown skin and a high ponytail. They’re smiling and laughing as they have an in-depth conversation.
“I just…nothing. Just saw a—a bird,” Matthew stutters, and I flick my eyes up. Barely any birds are flying above head, probably nestled in preparation for the big storm coming our way.
“You sure it wasn’t because of Delilah? The girl you have a huge crush on but are too afraid to ask out?” I tease, and his cheeks change a deep color of crimson red. I pinch one of his cheeks and laugh as he swats my hand away.
“No, I swear, I saw a bird.” He points to the sky, at a very large cloud.
“Unless the bird wants to be electrocuted by lightning, I don’t think you saw it.” I shake my head at him.
He begins to quip a comeback but proceeds to freak out, arms flailing and hushed words as the girl waves at Delilah before walking away. He turns to me, light blue eyes wide as saucers and cheeks red like he’s just been slapped out of the womb.
“I’ve gotta go. See you inside, yeah?” He speaks rapidly, and his hand moves everywhere, through his golden blond hair, to his glasses, to his khaki slacks. “Watch out for those nutty birds,” he snorts before wheeling around on his brown loafers, headed around the corner to the building.
I begin to laugh, but then I realize I’m still holding the bag with his cookie. “Matthew, wait! You forgot your cookie!” I shout after him. I round the corner but end up hitting a hard chest. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t…didn’t…” I trail off as I bring my head up. I expect to find an irritated business man, but I come face to face with the last person I want to see. “Dean?”
His lips quirk into a rueful smile, sending multiple jolts of ice slithering down my spine. “Miss me?” His voice sends me flying back. I stumble over my feet and scream as my foot slams on the concrete in an unnatural way. I cower and scream for help, shaking.
What is he doing here? How did he find me? Is that a gun in his hand? I am too frozen in shock, screaming my throat out until it is raw to look. But I see a flash of silver as he points his hand at me. My heart clambers up my throat as I try to breathe. This is a hallucination. He isn’t real. He isn’t here. I try to convince myself, but he isn’t going away. The barrel of the gun is cold against my palm.
“Help me!” I scream in finality, going cold all over as I realize what’s about to happen.
“Liv!” Matthew’s voice breaks through the bubble surrounding my indescribable fear.
I slowly move my hands from my face and hiccup in relief. Gentle blue eyes like the ocean. Square glasses fogged up from panic. Clean, good Matthew that always smells like bar soap and detergent.
“Matthew!” I spring from the floor and into his chest. A crowd that had gathered around without my notice begins to disperse, whispering and casting long looks toward me. Cheeks pink and body still buzzing from my mental breakdown, I pull away from his arms. “I’m sorry.”
“Never mind that. What the hell happened? I turned back to get my cookie, and the next thing I know you’re on the floor screaming bloody murder, like I was going to kill you.” He stumbles over his words and readjusts his glasses.
“I just…” I pause, wondering if I should lie or not. “I thought you were someone else.”
“Who? Freddy Kruger?” he half-jokes.
I bite my lip. “N-no one.” I walk around him, content with acting like that didn’t just happen. I thought I was getting better, minus the tiny episode I had last night. Besides that, I thought I was doing well. Guess not.
“Don’t lie.” He grabs my hand and tugs, forcing me to turn and face him. “Who did you think I was?” he asks. He already knows. He’s just being his normal sweet self and letting me come to the conclusion myself.
Hot tears build up in my eyes and, without thinking, I break down crying. “I—I thought you were him. I am so sorry.”
He pulls me into his chest, arms wrapped tightly around me, fingers lacing through my loose curly hair. “Shhh, there’s nothing for you to be sorry for.” He rubs my back soothingly, and I melt into his friendly touch.
“But I…I think I’m going crazy,” I croak into his neck.
“Don’t say that.” He pulls back and cups my face with his cold hands. “You are not crazy. You went through some pretty traumatizing things, and you’re still recovering. It may take a lot of you, but it will not take you as a whole. You’re still the brilliant, funny Olivia I know and love.”
“You love me?” I latch onto that one part.
He playfully rolls his eyes. “As a friend.” He taps my nose, and I scrunch it up, causing him to burst into a fit of laughter. “Someone else already has my eye.”
“Gosh darn it.” I snap my fingers and frowning.
He laughs some more and, this time, I join in. His good mood and humor help cool me down. My heart climbs back down to my chest where it belongs, and I’m not shaking anymore. I thank him profusely for being there to me and for his cookie, which he insists will cheer me up, both spiritually and physically.
“Such a dork,” I mutter to myself, now in my office.
“Now, I wouldn’t call myself a dork…” a deep male voice hums.
I jump and look up to find Garrett leaning against my door. When did he get in here, and how did I not hear him enter?
“Soft floors are best for ninja movements.” He winks at me jokingly.
I chuckle and sit up in my chair. “Hello, Garrett. I wasn’t expecting you.”
He shrugs. “I was just making my rounds, checking on you interns.” I nod and look around uncertainly. “Nice office.” His long neck cranes back as he takes in the tall ceiling.
“The furnishing came with it.” I shrug with a small smile, watching as his bluish-steel eyes find their way to me. He smiles broadly and strides over to my desk. I stand, but he waves a hand, telling me to stay seated.
“Please, I only came to inform you that you got in,” he says vaguely, a smile playing on his thin pink lips.
“Got in?” I tilt my head.
“Into NYU.” His eyes widen, and my heart drops.
“B-but I never a-applied…” What is he talking about?
“Oh, but you did.” He shrugs, slipping his hands into his expensive slacks. “I put in a good word for all of you interested for the big move to New York.”
He what?
“G-garrett, that is so amazing!” I break out into a shocked but wide grin. That means I can practically pack my things and move right now, get paid for a really great internship—all of which should be a dream for someone my age.
My eyes land on the framed photo of Grey and me.
My heart plummets, and I shake my head. “I can’t accept it.”
“Excuse me?” He sounds shocked.
I thought you were trying to be more independent. Don’t be stupid, Liv, a reasonable part of me speaks up.
“I mean…” I lick my lips and internally groan as a battle breaks out in my head. “H-how long do I have to accept this offer?” My voice is low, expecting him to pull it away now that I’ve openly and ungratefully turned it down without even thinking.
“December,” he says firmly, his usual easy-going tone gone. I look up into his hard eyes. “Don’t be a fool and let this go by. It took a lot of convincing to get you guys spots. I didn’t have to do that, but I believe in you…all of you. So take some time, but not too much.” I look down at my shaking hands and link them together to still them. “Be smart, Olivia.”
“I will.” I nod and hold my breath, waiting for him to leave. He finally does, and I breathe heavily and cover my face with my palms. My chest tightens, and I feel tears gather in my eyes. I basically had my planned dream life dangling in front of my hands, and I would grab at it. But the only thing holding me back is the one thing I didn’t plan or foresee in my dreams—Grey.
Do I
follow my heart and stay with him or go after the chance of a lifetime?
Chapter Thirty-Four
The battle of the organs keep me distracted most of the day. A fight between heart and brain, thoughts and feelings, clashing together like sharp swords. Dramatic, but it surely felt that way. The moment Garrett stepped out of my office, they picked up their weaponry and began dueling, great Vikings fighting over a piece of land, a land I like to call “Do I take the job or stay with the love of my life?” All I want is for there to be peace, to have a resolution so I don’t have to deal with the bloody aftermath.
A headache forms behind my eyes, and I make a detour. I can’t be around Grey with the hefty opportunity weighing heavily on my shoulders. I feel like my bones will snap in two like wish-bones if I spend even a second longer on the thought. So instead of going home, I decide to go to a friend’s to clear my mind for a bit. Jaimie and Julia’s. They moved out of the dormitories and into one of the apartments near the campus. I haven’t been there, and they moved last month.
I stop at a supermarket close to the apartments and pick up a buttercream cake so I don’t show up for the first time empty handed. However mental my mother may be, she did teach me to always be polite and well-mannered. Though I feel I’ve had a bit more push of compassion from Father. But I’d never tell her that unless I wanted my head bitten off.
I want to surprise them, but I have no idea what number their apartment is. I end up asking Jaimie what letter or number—or both?—their apartment is.
“Four-C, four-C,” I mumble to myself as I scan doors, clutching my fingers around the round cake in my hands. I stop at the one I’m looking for and use my head to lightly knock, holding the cake tightly so it doesn’t fall. I’d rather bake the cake, but I would have had to go home for that, and I’m here because I am escaping Grey. For the time being, not forever. I’ll go back, just after I decide what I’m going to do.
The bright red door swings open, and Jaimie gasps. “Bambi? Oh-em-gee!” she squeals, doing a little peppy dance, which is really just her jumping up and down on her tiptoes. She pulls me into a tight hug that sucks all my breath away in one go.
Grey: New Beginnings (Spectrum Series Book 5) Page 22