by Rebel Adams
Damn it.
Rubbing my tired eyes with the back of my hand, I let out a loud yawn. The sun is just about to set as I pull into the parking lot of the sheriff’s station. It seems as though it was just starting to come up when I got here this morning. My days begin and end at this place.
Fitting the cruiser into my designated spot, I get out of the car and head into the building. I’m immediately greeted by Barb, the Senior Department Specialist, standing behind the front desk. Her cheery disposition is overbearing at this time of the day, and I’m in no mood to deal with her small chitchat. Rather than getting caught up in conversation, I wave my hand as I walk past and try my damnedest not to make eye contact.
Today has been one of the longest shifts of my life. All I want to do is go home, sit in my chair and chug down a six-pack. The thought of the cool, amber liquid passing through my mouth sends my taste buds into overdrive. I lick my lips and scrunch my brows. A vivid imagination I may have, but the real taste of a cold beer is what I really want.
Walking into my office, I see a stack of manila folders sitting on the shelf next to the desk. My shoulders slouch and my head begins to pound a disturbing rhythm as I walk toward my desk.
Fuck me!
Grabbing onto my desk chair, I pull it out from beneath the desk and take a seat. If I don’t get started on this shit now, I’ll never get out of here.
I place my hat on the side of the desk and reach for the first file placing it in front of me. My eyes start getting heavy, and for a brief moment, I let them close. Thoughts begin to fly through my mind and I let myself sit back in my chair and think.
I’ve just been re-elected for my second term as Sherriff for the City of Philadelphia. I enjoy my job, but the long hours are beginning to weigh on me.
Being a cop, or rather a member of the police department, was always a career goal of mine. My grandfather was a narcotics detective, my father an undercover cop and now it’s my turn to carry out the family name as the Sherriff for my city. It’s in my bloodline to serve and protect, and so I shall.
Right after high school, I went straight into the Marine Corps and served my country for six years. Once my time was up, I moved back to Philly and started applying to local law enforcement agencies.
With my experience in the military, I was lucky enough to be accepted into the police academy within a few short months.
This is my life; it’s all I know.
After a rough patch of political bullshit during my time in as an officer, I found my calling when the position of sheriff was up for election. I wasn’t about to let people pull me down just because I was the son and grandson of two men with a legacy. I busted my ass every day and deserved everything I got… nothing was handed down to me.
I put in a lot of time, dedication and sweat, but it was well worth it. The title means nothing to me; it’s more about the job and the ways in which I can impact the large community that surrounds me.
I’m not usually a fucker when it comes to work, but lately, I feel like all I do is live and breathe the job. There is no time for a social life in my line of work; the days tend to drag out to no end.
Being a divorced man, I never really cared about working the long shifts. I’ve become a loner, a coldhearted shell of a man thanks to my ex-wife, who put me through hell.
Tessa and I were high school sweethearts; we were inseparable through school. Even when I left for boot camp, she was sure to send me letters every other day.
She was the love of my life, or so I thought.
I thought we would be together forever, raise a family and retire to a small house on the beach. The thoughts of her leaving and hurting me the way she did, never crossed my mind.
She sucked the life out of me, and now all I do is work, work and work some more. I thought keeping my mind busy would help ease the pain, but all it’s done is turn me into a thick block of ice. I have no heart; it was broken three years ago when Tessa left.
The door to my office swings open and slams against the wall. My eyes pop open and I see Lance, my deputy sheriff standing in the doorway.
“Hey, Ty, how long you plan on staying here tonight? A few of the guys are heading over to The Tavern and wanted to know if you were going to tag along.”
I look at the pile of documents sitting on the shelf and then back to Lance. “Not gonna happen tonight. I’ll be here for at least another hour,” I reply with a smirk.
“Suit yourself. If you get done early, come on over.”
I nod my head in his direction and turn back toward my desk. As much as I know going out will probably get me out of my funk for a few hours, I know I need to get this shit done. If not, I’ll be swamped come Monday morning.
I slide the mouse along the pad and wait for the computer system to come to life. Opening the first file, I dive into my work in hopes that I’m able to get it all done within an hour.
Saige
I slam the door to our apartment and storm down the stairs to my car. My arms are filled with bags of stuff I grabbed as fast as I could, before running out the door.
Today is the three year anniversary of the first time we met. It was supposed to be special; I planned everything so it would be perfect for tonight. I was going to make Ted his favorite meal, followed by a nice long soak in the tub and a seductive night of me in a brand new piece of lingerie.
It’s ruined; he’s destroyed me.
Coming home from the grocery store, I saw something that I know I’ll never be able to scrub from my memory.
What I just witnessed has broken me. My heart and soul are carved into a million pieces as confusion runs through my mind. My entire body is quivering and I can barely see where I’m walking. My eyes are filled with tears, hurt and regret.
That’s the last time I’ll ever trust another human being again. I can’t believe he did that… that she did that to me. After all we’ve been through together; he threw it away for a quick fuck.
Hell, for all I know, she could have been with him for a lot longer. I’ll never know the whole truth, nor do I want to at this point.
When I woke up in his arms this morning, in our bed, in our apartment, this was the last thing I thought would have happened to me today. I don’t know how I was so stupid, so naïve. How did I not see this coming?
Setting the bags down next to my car, I stick the key into the trunk of my old, beat-to-shit ‘72 Chevy Malibu. Tears stream down the side of my face and I blink a few times to clear my vision. I reach down and pick up the bags, tossing them into the trunk and standing on my tips toes to shut it. I round the left side of the car and unlock the door. My head is starting to pound from crying and I can barely see.
As I sit in the driver’s seat, I stare down at the steering wheel. Honestly, I don’t know what I’m going to do.
Where do I go?
Ted and I have been living together for the past year. I gave up everything I had to move in with him. I lost my apartment… my job… my friends… my life.
I have nowhere to go?
With the back of my trembling hand, I wipe away the tears while turning the key in the ignition with my other hand. I don’t know where I’m going to go, but I can’t stay here.
He didn’t even run after me. No one followed me to make sure I was okay. It just goes to show that I really meant nothing to them. Ted was the guy I thought was the love of my life and Jenn was the girl who I thought was my best friend.
Punching my fist into the steering wheel, I scream, “Stupid, Saige!”
I have to go. I can’t dwell on the past. The last half hour of my life has forever destroyed me.
As I pull out of the apartment parking lot, I notice the sun is just about to set. I may not know where the hell I’m going to go, but I better find a place to stay the night before it gets too late.
I pull onto the highway hoping of find a cheap motel. Money is not something that I have much of; in fact, I know I only have a few bucks left to my name. It won’t get me
far.
Not only do I need a place to stay, I need a job. There’s no way I’ll be able to get by for long without an income of some sort.
My stomach starts to rumble and I realize that I haven’t eaten anything since this morning.
Fuck!
Could anything else go wrong? I can’t eat; I don’t have the money to waste on food right now.
A thumping sound alerts my train of thought back to the road. The car starts to drift to the right and the steering wheel begins to shake.
What the hell?
I pull the Malibu off to the shoulder of the highway and turn on my four-way lights. Praying a chant over and over in my head, I hope that there isn’t something seriously wrong with my car.
I look out the side mirror to make sure no cars are coming toward me before I swing the car door open. Stepping along the side of the road I see that I not only have one flat tire, but two. “Jesus Christ!” I shout.
This is the worst day of my life and now I’m stranded on the highway with no one to come to my rescue.
Tears begin to fall down the side of my face and my chest begins to ache. I stand and stare at the car for what feels like an eternity. A cool wind blows my hair into my face and I snap out of my trance. It’s completely black outside, other than the lights of the passing cars. I get back into the car and rest my head against the seat.
Wiping away the tears, I try to think a way out of this. Thoughts run through my mind, but I still have no clue what the hell I’m going to do. I’ve never changed a flat tire; I don’t even know the first thing to do. Not to mention that I have two flats and only one spare tire in the trunk.
I’m screwed.
Letting out a heavy sigh, I rest my head back against the seat and close my eyes. Why is this all happening to me? What the hell did I ever do to deserve such punishment?
I open my eyes to see flashing through the rearview mirror. Shit, it’s a cop… wait, that could be a good thing.
Think positive thoughts, Saige.
Oh, thank God, a police officer has come to my rescue. Now if he has two full tires hidden in his trunk, I’ll be all set.
Tyler
Letting out a heavy sigh of relief, I shove the last folder into the filing cabinet. With two tired hands, I rub my eyes and run my fingers through my hair. As I turn back toward my desk, I glance to the clock on the wall. Thankfully, I’ve been able to conquer the pile of folders in less than an hour. Now, it’s time to get the hell out of here before someone finds me in my office. The last thing I want to do is sit back and shoot the shit with someone from the station.
Breathing out a heavy sigh, I determine my next move for the night. I have a choice to make: meet up with the guys from the station or head home. Lance mentioned that the guys from the department were heading over to The Tavern for a few drinks. I just don’t know if tonight is the night I’m ready to break free from my vicious cycle.
Hell, no night is ever the right night.
I’ve become a loner, a waste of space. The last thing the guys need is for me to sit at the bar and look miserable. I just want to strip myself of the badge and relax in my chair at home.
I know I’ll hear shit about it from them on Monday, but to be honest, I don’t feel like hanging out with a bunch of guys. All I ever wind up hearing is the story of their latest bang session with the local tramps from The Tavern.
Being lonely is one thing, but I can’t deal with the women that those guys take to their beds every weekend.
Fuck!
I shake my head at myself in disbelief. What the hell am I even thinking?
I have some serious issues.
It’s sad but true, I’d rather be home alone than sleep with some random chick. The thought that I don’t know or care what her name may be, makes me feel like a cold-hearted bastard. It’s been far too long since I felt the need for an intimate connection with another human being. I’ve been ruined, destroyed and have no interest in the possibility of a random hook up.
I haven’t felt connected to another person since… well, that one-night stand I had a few years back.
Looking for a way to release the anger, the pent up frustration of my divorce, I did something I’ve never done before. I didn’t see it coming, but after a night at The Tavern and a few shots too many, I found myself curled against her warm body, in her bed, the next morning.
I can’t say that I don’t remember what happened, because it’s a night that has played through my mind for the past three years. It’s the only thought I can secure that helps take away the pain of my failed marriage.
My body begins to feel tense as the pressure in my pants begins to build. She gave me exactly what I needed and more. Our connection was animalistic as we devoured one another all night long. There was something between us, but I can’t explain the way she made me feel.
When I left her the next morning, before she had woken, I felt a ping of guilt. I knew it was just one night, but for the short time we spent together, it felt like we were tied as one for an eternity. Not knowing how to react, I chalked it up to my vulnerability from the loss of Tessa in my life and went on like nothing happened. It didn’t work out so well for me. No matter how hard I try to push the memories to the back of my mind, that woman still sticks with me. Her smell, the touch of her skin against mine and the way her lips caressed every inch of my body.
She was my saving grace that night, and ever since, I’ve found it better to sleep alone than to have my heart broken again.
Now, the only thing that keeps my sane is this God forsaken job. At times, I don’t even know if it’s worth my energy to drag my ass in here each day.
Moving toward my desk, I break free of my trance and rub at my eyes. I’m exhausted. Reaching for the keys and my hat, I walk to the door and flip the light switch.
Peace out.
Finding my way out of the station, I keep my eyes to the ground and focus on my direction as I follow the stained tiles along the floor to the front of the building. I’m a coldhearted man. I have no interest in socializing with the men and women at the station; I’d rather spend my nights alone in my home.
What’s the point in any of it… there’s none.
My head continues to throb as I make my way to the cruiser. Opening the door, I toss my hat onto the passenger side seat and slide in behind the wheel. The sun has set and the darkness of the sky has my eyes willing to close. Before passing out from exhaustion, I put the car in reverse, make my way out of the parking lot and head down the highway.
My house isn’t more than ten miles from the station, but with typical highway traffic, it can take an eternity. Hopefully at this time of night, no backups will slow down my ride home.
I crank up the radio and focus on the street ahead of me. As I hit the halfway mark to the house, I see a car parked off onto the shoulder. The lights are still turned on and I can’t seem to see anyone outside of the vehicle. The last thing I want to do is pull over to check it out, but as sheriff, it’s my job to serve and protect. I pull the cruiser behind the piece of tin and reach for my hat.
My eyes roll to the back of my head and my conscience blares through my ears that I’m doing the right thing. I get out of the car and make my way to the driver’s side window to see a female slouched back in her seat.
Saige
I’m in a trance watching the lights of the car now parked behind me. A tapping sound on my window startles me and draws my attention to the side of my car. My chest is now heaving from crying so hard and my head is now starting to ache from the tears falling down my face.
It’s pitch black outside and I can’t make out the officer’s face, but knowing it’s a cop, I decide it’s okay to roll down the window.
Tears fall from my eyes as I try to control my sobs. “Hello, Officer,” I say in a trembling tone.
He clears his throat and bends down to the window. “Is there a problem that you’re pulled off to the side of the road?”
Letting out a hea
vy sigh, I try to compose myself the best I can. “Yeah, you could say that,” I reply between sniffles. “Today has been the day from hell, and to top it off, I have two flat tires.”
“Aren’t you able to change a flat?” he snipes.
What the fuck!
Didn’t he hear that I have two flat tires?
“Miss, did you hear my question?” he asks with a stern voice.
“No, officer, I don’t know how to change a tire, let alone two flat tires,” I spit back out at him.
The anger coursing through me is heightened when he starts to laugh under his breath. I don’t need his attitude or his help.
“Why don’t you step out of your vehicle and open the trunk. I’ll replace the tire with your spare and we can call AAA to see if they’ll come with another?”
Doesn’t he think that I would have already called AAA to come help me? If only I hadn’t forgotten my Goddamn cell phone at the apartment. I don’t want his help. He’s an arrogant police officer who just wants to gloat that he’s helped a fucked-up woman on the side of the road.
My eyes catch his arm as he moves to reach for the door handle. Without a thought, my hand moves to push down the lock.
“Lady, what are you doing?” he asks.
“Look, I don’t need your help, Officer. I’ll figure this out on my own.”
He lets out a breath of air and moves a step away from the door. “No you won’t. You have no clue how to change a flat and you have two if you haven’t noticed.”
Oh, my God, I want to bitch slap this guy. Does he think that I don’t already know what kind of a situation I’ve found myself in? God, please just get me out of here.
He reaches his arm in through the window and pulls up at the lock. I hear it click and watch as the door of my car begins to open. Extending his arm into the car, my body begins to shake. I don’t want his help, yet it may be the only way I can get off the side of the road.
I reach out for his hand with mine. As soon as our fingers touch, a bolt of electricity runs up my arm. Pulling my hand away from his, a feeling of desire surges through my body straight down to my core. I haven’t felt anything like that since that night three years ago.