I unbuttoned my jeans. I still couldn’t quite believe I was really doing this, but I was past the point of no return. I had committed, and now I was going for it. Far from letting the taboo or risk factor split my mind into two warring factions—pleasure and guilt—I had now surrendered completely to just accepting the overwhelming turn-on.
My fingertips pushed down past the hem of my panties and found their target. I was wetter than I realized. Maybe even wetter than I’d ever felt myself before. My fingers slipped right past my slick clit at first. I had to bring them back up to the top of my pussy and move them more slowly and deliberately in order to keep them right on my pleasure button.
My hand moved frantically in circles, and I slid my hips forward, angling them up to get better access. I tweaked my swollen nipples in time to the rhythm of the fingers between my legs, and soon I was seeing stars behind my closed lids.
Electricity zoomed through my body. I was out of my mind, vaguely worried that I might pass out. My breath sawed in and out so fast now it was almost like hyperventilating.
Nick’s face filled my imagination. I could feel his hands on my skin, hear his voice in my ear. Oh, fuck. As his imagined presence solidified in my mind, I zoomed faster and faster up the mountain of arousal. Soon I’d be cresting the peak. I could already feel it was going to be intense, something beyond my normal range of experience. I leaned my head back and surrendered myself to it entirely.
Chapter 17
Nick
WELL, FUCK. THAT was a disaster.
I turned my key in the door that led into the house, every part of me, body and soul, completely exhausted. I couldn’t go on another one of these blind date setups. I just couldn’t do it. I didn’t have the stamina for it.
Hell, I didn’t even have the stamina to finish this one. I’d made my excuses and cut it short by an hour. I just couldn’t take one more minute of the inane small talk.
I understood why B and my other friends kept setting me up. They were worried about me. They wanted to see me happy. Hell, of course I understood. It was the same reason I kept agreeing to go, just in reverse—I didn’t want to upset them. I wanted them to be happy. To stop worrying about me.
Since Jen had died, it seemed like all anyone ever did was worry about me. At first it had been necessary. Enveloped in grief, I’d been the sole surviving parent of the world’s most precious little girl, and I didn’t have the first damn clue what to do or how to handle it. I’d needed their worry and the support they’d given because of it.
But, now? I was doing fine. Not great. But fine. I had my baby girl, and as long as she was happy and safe, there was nothing else I wanted.
Well, there was one thing…Evelyn.
The thought burst into my brain uninvited, but once it was there, it consumed me completely. Just like thoughts of her did every time they intruded. I knew I couldn’t act on my attraction. I’d been through the argument so many times in my head since we’d met that night, and I just couldn’t see a way clear to us being together.
Exhibit one, she was Olive’s babysitter—the first woman she’d opened up to since Jen’s death. Olive loved her.
Also, I had come to depend on her more than I would’ve thought possible in the couple of months she’d been watching Olive. Trust was not something that came easily for me when it came to my baby, and I trusted Evelyn with…everything. I couldn’t put that at risk. Even if she was a walking, talking fantasy come to life.
I was so caught up in thoughts of Evelyn as I stepped through the door from the garage that I didn’t do the normal routine I usually engaged in when I came home—opening up the door, flipping on the lights, and calling out softly to let Evelyn know I was home. No, this time, I just stepped into the darkened hallway and kept walking.
That was when I noticed the light coming through underneath the guest bathroom door. It caught my eye in the dark hallway. I turned on the hall light and waited to hear the sound of the toilet flush, then the water in the sink that would let me know she was finishing up. My plan was to call out to her so I didn’t startle her when she walked out and saw me.
That didn’t happen, though. I stood there for a few long moments, then felt a flash of concern. What if she’d gotten sick, or passed out?
I stepped up to the door and was just about to knock when I heard a sound that stopped me.
It was my name, in a soft voice. She was whisper-moaning my name.
I wasn’t sure if I’d imagined it at first, but then she did it again, and the pieces fell into place.
Fuck! This hot, young, amazing girl was sitting two feet away from me separated by nothing but a thin door, completely unaware of my presence, and touching herself.
FUUUUUUCK!
Images sprang into my mind, ones I’d been trying to suppress for weeks. Evelyn, naked, running her hands over her body…in my mind, though, it was my hands that touched her skin, my lips that pressed against hers, and my tongue that tasted every inch of her.
My erection pressed painfully against my jeans. It was so fucking hot, listening to her give herself pleasure. Now she wasn’t just a walking, talking fantasy—she was a wet dream come to life. I had to stroke myself. I couldn’t hold back.
I quietly undid my fly and pulled out my cock, keeping my ear pressed to the door. I grasped my dick firmly. As soon as the sensitive skin came in contact with my hand, images flashed through my mind, bursting in explosions of white light before fading into the next image.
Evelyn on her knees in front of me, her lips wrapped tightly around my steel erection.
Me, licking her nipples as she looked down on me, watching the movement of my tongue on her breasts.
My head moving in between her wide open legs as she arched her back and screamed.
Evelyn on her hands and knees in bed as I plowed into her from behind, her hips in my firm grasp, her ass slapping my belly as I jerked her back against me again and again, driving my dick deeper into her with each thrust.
All this time, I had pushed down erotic thoughts of her every time they tried to bubble up. Now that I had allowed them to come in, the floodgates were open and pushing them away, even if I’d wanted to, would’ve been a losing proposition.
My fist moved faster and faster on my cock with each stroke. Fuck. I was about to come, and it would shoot all over the floor if I wasn’t careful. I reached back through the garage door and grabbed a dishtowel from the laundry basket that sat just inside.
Her moans were coming faster now, and just a little louder. I still had to strain to hear through the door, but not quite as hard. Still, with even the little I could hear, it was obvious that she was also getting close to coming.
“Nick…oh, God, Nick.” Her soft whisper shot straight to my hard cock. The decision of whether or not to come was ripped from me. Her inadvertent whispering of my name had only one explanation—she’d been imagining me as she touched herself.
FUCK!
What was she thinking about? Me eating her? Fucking her? The possibilities only got hotter and hotter, and I’d probably be exploring them in length—and great detail—later that night, in bed.
For the moment, though, I had to get out of there. I ducked quickly and quietly back through the garage door, taking the towel with me. In about ten minutes, I’d walk in through the front, calling out that I was home and flipping the entryway light on. That would give her enough time to get herself together.
In the meantime, though? That was ten full minutes to fantasize about Evelyn.
Chapter 18
Evelyn
“EVELYN! PAY ATTENTION!” Olive’s voice snapped me back to reality. She was telling me a story, using her Barbie dolls as props, and I had drifted away for a moment.
“Sorry, sweet girl. I’m back now. Your story’s really good! Can I hear the rest of it?”
Olive’s eyes narrowed in suspicion for a moment. Finally, she tilted her head to the side and cocked an eyebrow. “And then we can get an ice cream?�
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Damn. Girl knew how to hit me up when I was vulnerable. I nodded, and she grinned and went back to her story, satisfied with the outcome she’d engineered.
It felt supremely weird being at Nick’s after what I’d allowed myself to do the other night—something I still couldn’t quite believe I’d done, to be honest. It was so unlike me. I was about as far from being a “wild girl” as you could get. Sex in public places, kinky fetishes, masturbating in someone else’s house? These were all way outside of my normal range.
I would’ve said I didn’t know what had gotten into me, but that wouldn’t have been true. It was just being there, in his house, where he spent all his time every day—where he ate, slept, showered. Damn. It was just too much. I felt a flush rising on my neck even now and harshly tamped it down. I had a job to do at the moment, and it was keeping Olive occupied and happy. I needed to focus on that.
In many ways, it was far tougher to watch her when I knew Nick was going to be home in the next few minutes. It was just unbelievably difficult to keep my mind on Olive and her adorable antics when all my mind wanted to focus on was the fact that I was mere moments from being in the same room with him.
God, it was like every nerve ending in my body stood up and took notice of his impending presence, and ignoring them as they screamed at me at top volume was almost beyond my capability.
Olive’s head snapped up as the sound of the door opening echoed through the house. A grin lit her face at the realization that Nick was here.
A moment later, he popped his head around her bedroom doorway, smiling at Olive. “Hey, sweetie.”
She jumped up and pounced on him. “Hi, Daddy! Evelyn said I could have ice cream.”
He laughed. “She did, huh? Well, why don’t you go get that? I’ll be down in a minute. Daddy’s gonna talk to Evelyn real quick.”
My stomach dropped. Oh, shit. Did he know about the other night? Had my little erotic adventure left behind some unintentional evidence? My stomach started to swirl. Was there some kind of nanny cam set up?
Had he seen me do what I’d done? No. I was in the bathroom. He wouldn’t put a nanny cam in there.
But what if he had? Was he mad? Was he going to fire me?
Nick turned back around to face me, and his eyes widened. “Oh, God, Evelyn, are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
I was too shaky to speak, but I managed to nod.
“Are you sure?”
Another nod. He took my elbow, sending shockwaves rocketing up my arm, and guided me over to Olive’s bed.
“Here, hon. Sit down. Do you need a glass of water?”
I shook my head. Still no words, but this time it was because I’d been knocked back by hearing him call me “hon.”
Oh…mama.
The warmth that spread through me at those words would’ve been enough on their own to make me need to sit down, let alone my fear over getting chewed out about the highly embarrassing bathroom incident.
Nick knelt in front of me and studied my face. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I nodded, but he seemed far from convinced. I decided to put in the effort and up my acting game.
“I’m fine,” I said, with a blasé tone and dismissive wave of my hand. “I just need to stop skipping breakfast. It’s messing with my blood sugar.”
He studied me for a moment more before nodding, apparently deciding to take me at my word.
Am I reading too much into this? Or is he, like…actually…worried about me? Like…for real?
“All right… Well, I was going to ask you if you were free to come on a trip with us this weekend. My sister-in-law and her husband got a deal on a cabin and invited Olive and me. But I don’t want to put more pressure on you, with your schedule—”
“Yes!” The word burst from me in a flash. A little too quick, and a little too loud. So much for employing my acting skills. I should’ve told myself I was playing the role of “sane girl.” Then maybe I would’ve stood a chance.
Nick grinned. “Are you sure? I don’t want to interfere with school. I know you’re playing catch up since the show closed. I just thought…it would be fun for Olive, you know? And for you, too. Like a getaway.”
“Absolutely.”
Just then, Olive peeked around the door frame, her face smeared with chocolate ice cream. I couldn’t help but laugh, and Nick did the same. He pulled a bandana from his back pocket and stepped to her, rubbing her face with it.
“Did you get any of that ice cream in your mouth, Doodle Bug? Or did it all end up on your face?”
She giggled, and I melted. Wow, was that just the sweetest sound in the world?
Olive pushed Nick’s hand away from her face, still laughing. Then, in a loud stage-whisper, asked, “So, Daddy? Did she say yes?”
Nick looked at me, a conspiratorial glint in his eyes, and then looked back at Olive. Matching her whisper, he said, “Yep, baby girl. She sure did.”
The explosion of joy that occurred then was so huge I was amazed it was able to be contained by the body of just one tiny human. But it was.
She shrieked and threw herself at me, wrapping her arms and legs around me like an octopus. The shriek devolved into all-out laughter, and I couldn’t help but join in. Her pure, childlike happiness was infectious.
The only thing holding me back from surrendering myself to complete excitement about the trip was the realization that—holy fuck—I was going to need to get my emotions in check before spending a weekend in a remote cabin in the woods with this beautiful man.
Chapter 19
Evelyn
“WHAT ARE THESE doing in here?”
I gave Sandy a suspicious side-eye as I reached into my suitcase and pulled out a tiny scrap of lace, barely big enough to be called a handkerchief, let alone—
“Are these underwear?”
The wicked smirk that appeared on her lips was accompanied by a wink. “My gift to you. To help make the weekend memorable.”
“But…but…” I sputtered. “The tags are bigger than the underwear!”
She sighed, the picture of longsuffering. “First of all, my naïve girl, the preferred nomenclature is panties. Keep it classy, babe. And secondly…there’s a matching bra in there, too.”
I shook my head. “Sandy, you do realize this is a work trip, right? Like… I’m the nanny. I’m there to babysit. This isn’t a vacation, let alone some kind of romantic getaway.”
Sandy laughed and adopted an exaggerated faux-shocked tone. “Right. Because ‘Daddy Boffing the Babysitter’ is, like, something that’s never happened, right? No! I’ve never heard of an affair with the nanny. I think this one will be the first in the history of ever.”
I rolled my eyes. “I swear. You come back from spring break boo’d up, and all of a sudden you’re an expert on all things relationship. Trust me, Nick is not interested.”
“Hmmm…I notice you didn’t say it wasn’t like that between you or something.”
“What are you talking about? That’s exactly what I just said.”
“Um, no. You just said he doesn’t like you like that. You conveniently left out how you feel about him.”
My cheeks were so hot that I knew they must be fire-engine red. I stayed carefully facing the other direction, making a show of being fascinated with what was in my suitcase. “You’re nitpicking. That’s just semantics.”
Sandy groaned. “No. Trust me. I can’t let such a gross misuse of a word stand. You say something is ‘just semantics’ when the difference in words doesn’t change the meaning of what’s being said. In this case, it changes the entire meaning of what’s being said! It’s the opposite of ‘just semantics,’ in fact.”
“Says you.”
She snorted. “Nice comeback. Wow. You’re super defensive. You must actually be really nervous about this weekend.”
“For the last time—”
“I wish Bran, Cat, and Michelle were around to back me up. They’d be Team Dad Boffing
The Babysitter, just like I am.”
“You can’t just decide what other people would think about something and use that as additional evidence for your point. I mean, how do you even know they’d agree with you?”
She pulled out her phone. “Well, let’s give them a call and find out.”
“Never mind.” I put my hand out to stop her. “I don’t want to get into it.”
She grinned and dropped her phone back into her bag. “Aaaand that’s how I know I’m right.”
I couldn’t help smiling against my will. “You’re a real smartass, you know that?”
“Yes. I do. And, like so many other things in life, it’s funny because it’s true.”
Oh, damn. I didn’t want to admit it to myself, but I really couldn’t hold out any more. Sandy really did have my number.
Chapter 20
Evelyn
SO THIS IS what heaven is like.
I looked out the window of the car, pretending to check out the scenery. In reality, though, I was using the opportunity to hide the dreamy smile that kept popping up on my face against my will.
As it turned out, Olive had stayed with her aunt and uncle the night before and was going to be riding up to the cabin with them.
That meant it was Nick and me, alone in the car.
For four solid hours. Alone. In a small, confined space. Where the manly smell of his cologne filled my nostrils, and the heat of his arm, just inches from mine, caused my skin to burn. Where, three times now, his hand had brushed mine when they’d been lying next to each other on the center console. Where I could feel the rumbling of his gravelly voice in my belly every time he spoke.
It was the best day of my life. Pathetic, really. The absolute best day of my life was a car ride with the object of my unrequited love. If I didn’t get things under control soon, I might bust into “On My Own” from Les Mis.
But, I’d decided to embrace the pathetic and just roll with it. For the moment, at any rate, it was making me deliriously happy.
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