Shock flooded Belle’s heart and mind. She knew Nic enjoyed coming home to a nice house, but she’d never put her reasons in such emotional terms. It hadn’t occurred to her that Nic wanted to keep her worlds separate to preserve a safe place for herself. Nic carried scars from her upbringing—never having anything of her own, never able to hold onto something beautiful, always fearing what the next minute might bring. Belle immediately felt guilty for pushing her as if asking for a holiday abroad or some petty extravagance.
Her eyes brimmed with tears, and Nic must have misinterpreted them because she apologized all over herself. “I’m sorry, Belle. I didn’t mean to upset you. You can come with me. We’ll figure out a way to—”
“No, baby. You’re right.”
“No, I’m silly. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t, really. I’m not upset.” Belle wiped at her tears, her heart achingly full. “I wonder how I got so blessed to have such an amazing, caring, insightful partner.”
“You deserve so much more. You deserve the whole world.”
Belle took Nic’s face in her hands. “Nic McCoy, you are the whole world to me. Don’t you know that by now?”
Nic’s pupils dilated with that unmistakable mix of love and attraction Belle had also seen a lot more lately, and she smiled a slow smile of acknowledgment, then kissed her quickly before sitting back in her chair. The storm had passed, but judging by the way her body responded under Nic’s gaze, a new kind of electricity was stirring between them, one that wouldn’t be settled with a quick kiss on the patio.
*
Davis’s call went straight to voice mail like every other call she’d made over the weekend. She found it odd Nic got such terrible service outside Atlanta. Athens wasn’t a huge city but more than big enough to warrant adequate cell coverage. Then again maybe the service wasn’t the problem. Nic had a habit of forgetting to check her phone. She’d noticed a lot of times when they were together Nic left her phone in the car overnight or turned it off, only checking in before going to work in the morning, though on those occasions Davis loved the habit. Having Nic’s undivided attention made her feel important, and she found the complete disconnect from the outside world romantically old fashioned. When apart she wished Nic were a little easier to connect with.
She glanced across her apartment and could still feel Nic there. The vase of tiger lilies she’d had delivered yesterday adorned her windowsill. No one had ever sent her flowers, and the fact that Nic had remembered her favorite variety and had chosen them instead of the more generic roses made the gesture all the more special. In the kitchen was a new picture magneted to the refrigerator. It was a self-portrait, taken at the Braves’ home opener. They both wore jerseys with matching ball caps and looked totally smitten with each other. Nic had pulled Davis close, then held the camera at arm’s length in front of them before snapping the shot.
The phone in her hand vibrated, startling her so much she dropped it. She chased it across her hardwood floor, stubbing her bare toe on the couch as she went. “Shit, shit, shit.” She doubled over, grabbing her foot with one hand and the phone with the other. “Ouch, ouch, ouch. Hello, hey, I’m here.”
“You okay?”
“Oh, hi, Cass.” She sat down on the floor and rubbed her toe.
“Wow, don’t sound so thrilled.”
“No, sorry. I just stubbed my toe.”
“Stubbed your toe diving for the phone because you thought it was Nic calling?”
“What? No. Maybe.”
“Is she in town this weekend?”
“No, but she usually calls to chat.” Maybe chat wasn’t the right word. Nic checked in at least every other day, but the calls were usually short and focused on making plans for the next time they’d see each other. Sometimes she felt like Nic called more out of duty than desire. They never had the in-depth conversations or the passionate dialogue they shared in person. Sometimes she thought the woman on the phone was someone other than the woman who shared her bed. Maybe Nic just didn’t care to talk on the phone. Some people were like that, but Davis continued to try.
“You sit around all day waiting for her to call and chat?”
“No. Geeze, you make me sound pathetic. I work, I go for bike rides, I went to see a movie with you last week.”
“That was two weeks ago.”
“What’s your point?”
“Nothing.” Cass’s annoyance gave way to sincerity. “I miss you. Let’s go out.”
“I’m not really in the mood for a night out.”
“Come on. You can take your cell with you in case Nic calls.”
“No, it’s not about that. I’m just not into the bar scene. Why don’t you come over here and we’ll order Chinese and veg out.”
“How about we go out for Chinese and then go dancing?”
Davis sighed. “I just want a night at home.”
“All you get anymore are nights at home.”
“Not true. Nic and I went out three nights in a row this week. Dancing, the theater, Roller Derby, it’s nonstop. I think she tries to cram a whole week’s worth of fun into our few days together.”
“I think she’s trying to cram something else into you,” Cass muttered
“God, you’re smutty,” Davis said disgustedly, then added, “but yes, she does plenty of that, too.”
“At least she has that going for her.”
“She has a lot going for her, Cass. She’s smart and ambitious and passionate. I’ve never met anyone who makes love with the intensity she does.”
“Sure.” Cynicism crept back into Cass’s tone. “She’s got everything except a house in Atlanta, so while the cat’s away, let’s go play.”
“I’m done with that kind of playing.”
“Damn, I knew it. You’re not going out with me because you’re doing the chaste-woman-waiting-for-her-man-to-return-from-war bit.”
“I’m not doing a bit,” Davis explained. “I’m not interested in fending off horny fakes and posers when I’ve got the real deal.”
“You don’t have the real deal tonight. Do you really believe she’s holding herself to the same code of conduct up there in her college town full of hot, young coeds?”
“Yes,” Davis said, then faltered. “I think so.”
“Just so you know, I’m rolling my eyes,” Cass said. “Are you still pretending to go with the flow after all this time, even though you’re clearly already designing your wedding dress in your mind?”
“No, we’re definitely a couple now. She’s my girlfriend.” Davis liked saying that aloud. She’d lost a lot of her fear of being needy or moving too quickly. Nic had been more open in the months since their Roller Derby date. “We’re not U-Hauling it, but I’m pretty sure we’re way past the casual-sex stage.”
“Pretty sure? You haven’t talked about it?”
“We don’t have to talk about it. She’s not like that.” She wasn’t sure if she needed to defend her judgment or Nic’s. “She’s respectful and attentive and considerate. The way she talks about her dreams and her fantasies when she’s with me tells me all I need to know about her commitment level.”
“Well, if she’s so perfect, why isn’t she with you tonight?”
“She works in Athens.”
“On Saturday night?”
“She’s got a lot of odd hours. Even when she’s in the city she has to stay late and take conference calls with people in different time zones, and she can’t just live on the interstate all the time.”
“Why not go to her?”
“I, just, well…” Davis didn’t want to say she hadn’t been invited.
Cass seemed to grow more suspicious with each question. “Do you know where she lives?”
“You make it sound so shady. It’s not like she’s hiding from me. I’ve just never asked.” Cass clearly didn’t understand how much she and Nic had grown together over the last few months. Nic didn’t withhold anything from her anymore. She loved to be challe
nged, and she never balked at Davis’s sarcastic side. She was completely open. Well, maybe not completely. She didn’t like to talk about her life in Athens or her childhood, but those were the only off-limit topics, and Davis respected her boundaries. She didn’t like to talk about her upbringing either, so they fit together perfectly in that area, too.
“I’m sorry. I’m probably just jealous.”
“Aw, don’t be jealous. You could have a relationship too if you’d just open up. Women would line up around the block for you.”
“No, you cheeseball. I’m not jealous you have Nic. I’m jealous she stole my wingman, and while you’re recovering from all the hot sex, I don’t have anyone to go out with.”
“Oh. Well, yes, there’s that.” Davis laughed. “But if you miss me so much, come hang out at my place.”
“Thanks, but no thanks.” Cass feigned depression. “I’ll just go out all by myself, with no one to make snarky comments to or judge women inappropriately with.”
“Oh, I’m sure you won’t be alone for long.”
“Well, that’s true. I am insanely good-looking. I’ll probably have you replaced within the hour, but if you change your mind, give me a call, okay?”
“Okay, have fun,” Davis said, knowing Cass always found someone to have fun with, but that brand of fun wasn’t enough for Davis anymore. In fact, she wasn’t sure anything other than Nic would ever be enough for her again.
*
Nic flopped onto her plush couch and flipped on her big flat-screen TV to check the Braves’ score. “Shit.”
“What’s the matter?” Belle called from the kitchen.
“We’re losing to the flipping Marlins.”
“I’m sorry, honey.”
Nic smiled. Belle didn’t care about baseball, but she cared about her, so she always managed to summon up some sympathy for her sports-related woes, which was the next best thing. “Why don’t you come watch with me, or we can watch something else if you want.”
“No, baseball is fine. I’ll be in as soon as I finish packing your briefcase for tomorrow.”
“Don’t bother with work stuff. I’ll pack in the morning.”
“It’s no bother.”
Nic shrugged and turned up the sound on the game. She didn’t understand what Belle got out of jobs like that, but she swore she enjoyed it, so after thirteen years Nic had learned to let her go. Besides, who complained about having amazing meals, an immaculate house, and never having to do her own laundry? If only the Braves would pull it together, she’d have it made.
“Honey, you have some missed calls on your cell phone,” Annabelle called.
“It’s after eight on my one night at home this week. I’m off the clock, and you should be, too.”
Belle came and sat next to Nic. “Okay. I like having you all to myself. I just noticed someone named Davis called three times. I thought it might be important if he’s trying to get ahold of you so bad.”
Nic’s breath caught in her chest, and she tried to sound casual. “I’m sure everything will be fine. I’m not going to let it interrupt our evening.”
“I don’t think I’ve met Davis.”
“No, you haven’t.” Nic tried to sound casual, but her heart hammered in her throat. At least Belle assumed Davis was a man, which made things easier.
“Is he one of the new sales reps?”
“He’s an intern. He probably wants the itinerary for our proposal meeting tomorrow.” The lie rolled off Nic’s tongue so quickly it shocked her. She’d never thought of herself as deceptive. Even in her relationship with Davis, she’d only lied by omission.
“Maybe you should call him back. It’s not nice to torment the interns,” Belle said playfully.
Eager to end this conversation, Nic took the offered opportunity. “Sure. Let me go in the office and pull up the paperwork.”
“Go ahead. I’ll be right here when you’re done.”
She grabbed her phone and walked into her home office. What kind of a person was she becoming? The last two months had been amazing. Every part of her life was better than it had ever been. At home she relished the comforts of Annabelle and their life together, and in Atlanta she thrived on the passion and adventure Davis provided. Hell, even at work she’d experienced an added boost of confidence, but she couldn’t get careless. She didn’t want to lose any of her newfound balance, and that meant keeping her worlds separate. This was her time with Belle, time to relax, recharge, and enjoy the woman who’d been her world for thirteen years. Whatever Davis needed had to be dealt with quickly.
She hit the redial button on her phone.
“Hey, babe,” Davis answered. “You been hiding from me this weekend?”
“I could never stay away from you,” Nic said truthfully.
“Good, because I miss you.”
Nic was both flattered and frustrated that Davis risked blowing her cover just because she missed her. “Is that why you called?”
“Pretty much.”
“Then I tell you what. You hold that thought just long enough for me to get my presentation done tomorrow, and I’ll be all yours.”
“That’s a very smooth way of saying you’re too busy for me right now.”
Nic smiled. Davis always called her on her bullshit. “Smooth, but true. Why don’t I pick you up at six and we’ll go blow off some steam before we go home and…well blow off some more steam.”
“I like the sound of that, but I’m sure there’s a way I could help you blow off some steam right now over the phone.”
Nic’s face flamed. Was Davis offering what she thought she was offering? “Oh yeah?”
“Sure, baby. Just unzip your fly and think about my fingers slipping beneath the waistband of your jockey shorts.”
The blood that had colored Nic’s cheeks rushed to some place decidedly lower in her body. She had to stop this quickly before she lost every rational brain function. “Hey now, that’s not fair. You know my imagination can’t hold a candle to the real deal. Let’s save that energy for a time when you can really use it.”
“Oh, you’re no fun, you old prude.”
Nic gritted her teeth against the competitiveness rising within her. “You’ll get your fun, but you’ll have to wait for it. When I get to you tomorrow, I’ll have you ready to beg.”
“You’re mighty sure of yourself.”
“With good reason.”
“Pick me up at six o’clock and we’ll see who begs first.”
“Deal.”
“Good night, dear.”
“Good night, Davis.”
Nic sat back in her black leather desk chair, the cool surface doing little to soothe the residual heat from their conversation. God, who was she? She’d lied effortlessly to both Belle and Davis within the span of five minutes. If Belle had answered the phone when Davis had called, she could’ve lost both of them. She cared about Davis, and she cared about Belle. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she shattered them. The best way to avoid a disaster was to stop putting herself in these positions, but she wouldn’t give either of them up. Few thrills compared to having two beautiful women adore her, even if at times like this she didn’t like herself very much. She had the good sense to feel bad about considering phone sex with Davis while Annabelle did her laundry down the hall, but these instances were rare.
She wouldn’t give in to some crisis of confidence over one phone call. Moments when her two worlds collided disoriented her, but she simply had to remember where she was. She stared out her windows. Even in the fading light of dusk she saw the magnolia tree in full bloom, sprinkling white petals across her patio and perfectly maintained yard. Taking in deep breaths, she could still detect the scent of the fried okra Belle had cooked for dinner, and she barely made out the sounds from the ball game she’d left on the TV. She wasn’t in Atlanta with Davis. She was at home, surrounded by the things that anchored her, kept her safe, and soothed her.
She strolled back to the living room and sa
t down, wrapping an arm around Belle’s shoulder and pulling her close. Belle rested her head on Nic’s chest, filling her senses with the scent of her shampoo and the feel of her body melding with her own. Everything was once again exactly how it should be. Everyone was happy, especially Nic. She intended to keep it that way.
Chapter Six
“Where’s Nic working this week?” Liz asked over her filet of salmon in a balsamic reduction sauce. Their country club had long been known for its haute cuisine, and clearly their new chef upheld the tradition.
Annabelle didn’t even try to temper her pride. “She’s in Atlanta. The big suits are keeping her close these days. She’s had lots of meetings with the corporate brass that she didn’t used to get invited to, and they’re introducing lower reps to her accounts in other cities. We suspect the promotion is imminent.” She didn’t like to brag about her perfect partner when Liz spent her time chasing a deadbeat dad, but they’d shared a bedroom for years and their DNA for life, so she couldn’t keep anything from her sister.
“I can’t believe how fast she’s climbed the ladder. Did you ever think you’d be married to a vice president of anything?”
“Honestly, no. I just wanted her to do what made her happy, but I’m not surprised. She can do anything if she wants it bad enough.”
“Well, I’m happy for both of you,” Liz said. “Plenty of the uptight old biddies around here would have loved to see you fail, and Lord knows this country-club set wasn’t the most enthusiastic about one of their blue bloods falling for a woman with no connections to speak of, but you’ve outlasted half of their marriages and added more money to the coffers than most of their native sons.”
Belle smiled as she speared one last piece of her Cobb salad. She and Nic had raised more than a few eyebrows in their early days, but she’d known all along she was the lucky one. “You always had a harder time with their attitudes than I did. It’s never been about the money or appearances for me, and I have no political agenda.”
Does She Love You? Page 7