by Annie Lyons
‘I don’t remember telling you it was going to be that sort of party,’ chuckled Jesse.
Rob held up his hands. ‘Sorry. I couldn’t help myself. It’s been a while,’ he said.
The waitress blushed and darted back to the safety of the kitchen. Cat turned to Jesse. ‘Well thank you for a most entertaining evening,’ she laughed, kissing him on the cheek. ‘Rob, I would say it was a pleasure but I think the pleasure was all yours.’ She grinned. Rob looked sheepish.
‘I’ll call you next week and let you know how it goes with Donald,’ said Jesse, escorting her down the steps of the house and into a waiting taxi. ‘Have a good weekend.’
‘You too.’ She smiled. She climbed into the taxi and watched Jesse until he became a waving dot in the distance. She turned back and looked out of the window, watching as the houses sped by taking her closer to home. The weekend loomed large; normally she would have been working on a campaign or attending an event. In her newfound role as weekday nanny, Cat realised with rising anxiety that for the first time in her life, she had two days ahead of her with absolutely nothing to do.
Chapter Seven
‘Earth to Cat. Are you receiving me?’
Cat glanced up from her egg-white omelette to see Ava waving a forkful of cubed watermelon at her. ‘Sorry, did you say something?’
Ava shook her head in disbelief. ‘Sweet potato, I’m worried about you. You don’t seem yourself today. I mean I know you’ve got all this crap with work but still, there’s something different about you. I can’t quite put my finger on it.’ She sat back and regarded her friend with a practised eye.
‘Sorry,’ repeated Cat. ‘I’m just a bit distracted.’ She took a bite of her omelette and looked around the room. ‘I might order some chips,’ she added.
Ava looked astonished. ‘Whatever happened to carb-free Cat?’
Cat laughed. ‘I’m hungry.’
Ava chuckled. ‘Well good for you, honey. I feel as if I’ve been on a diet since 1978.’ She looked down sadly at her fruit salad. ‘Hang it, get a bowl and I’ll share them with you.’
Twenty minutes later, the friends were staring at an empty bowl of chips. Ava grinned at Cat. ‘That felt good. So, tell me, how’s life with the rug rats?’
‘Honestly?’
Ava put her hand on her heart as if preparing for an awful truth. ‘I can take it.’
‘Unpredictable, noisy, infuriating, trying, cheeky, rude, funny with occasional moments of sweetness.’
‘Sounds pretty much like your client list.’
Cat laughed. ‘Yes, I suppose there are similarities except that I don’t get paid.’
‘That’ll be motherhood then.’
‘Except that I’m not their mother. Mothers want to be there. They choose to have children and they love them unconditionally.’
‘So don’t you love these little urchins then?’
It was a simple question and Cat realised that she hadn’t considered it until this moment. What did it mean to love someone? She loved her brother. That was easy. But did she love his children by default? Or maybe it was that thing that happens in families where you loved them but didn’t necessarily like them? That wasn’t right either. She didn’t dislike the children; they were just there. ‘I don’t know,’ she said. ‘I care for them and they’re my brother’s children so maybe it comes with the territory. You love your family, don’t you?’
Ava shrugged. ‘Couldn’t stand mine. That’s partly why I left New York and never went back.’
‘Never?’
‘I went back to see friends but never my folks.’
‘I’m sorry,’ said Cat.
‘Don’t be,’ declared Ava. ‘I’m not.’
Cat thought about the kids for a moment. ‘Charlie can be a little shit. Did I tell you about him running off on that trip to London?’
Ava nodded. ‘Sounds as if he was putting you through your paces.’
‘Trying to give me a heart attack more likely,’ said Cat. ‘But there’s more going on than he lets on. I think there’s some unhappiness inside him. He lashes out from time to time and doesn’t really know how to deal with it. Whereas Ellie is very straightforward. She tells it like it is.’
‘A girl after my own heart.’ Ava smiled.
Cat nodded. ‘And mine. She told me that she didn’t like me but the other day she made me a daisy-chain bracelet. She’s quite funny too. I guess they’re both missing their mum.’
Ava regarded her friend for a moment. ‘Cat?’
‘Hmm?’
‘It sounds to me as if you’re getting into this new role and dare I say even enjoying it a little?’
Cat frowned. ‘Well you know me. I don’t do things by halves. I wouldn’t say I was enjoying it but you know I like a challenge. Anyway, it’s only a temporary thing, until Jesse sorts things out with the Americans. He’s meeting up with Donald Carter next week.’
Ava looked confused. ‘I don’t think so, honey.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I would know if Donald Carter was coming to town. We go way back.’
‘Oh well he probably meant that they have a conference call scheduled,’ said Cat quickly, knowing that this was unlikely.
‘Yeah, that’s probably it,’ said Ava, but the look on her face told Cat she didn’t believe it either. ‘Anyway, apart from taking vomiting children to Michelin-starred restaurants, what have you been up to?’ she asked, changing the subject.
Cat considered her weekend so far. She had woken early on Saturday as usual, got her digital hit as usual over a coffee at home and, knowing that she had no work commitments or indeed work to do, had decided to head into the West End for a spot of shopping. Usually, this would have been a rare treat for Cat – a chance to browse, select and purchase; to indulge in a little bit of time for herself. She had headed straight for Selfridges and made a beeline for the handbag department. She had her mind on a replacement for her Kelly bag following what she was now calling ‘wee-gate’. She had disinfected the bag thoroughly but she wasn’t sure she would ever see it in the same light again.
The handbag department was Cat’s sweetshop; she loved to take in everything at once and then hone in on anything special that caught her eye. Today it was a Givenchy purse in a shade of dark cherry, made from soft Italian leather. To Cat’s mind, its three hundred and fifty pound price tag was entirely reasonable and she was considering buying one of each colour when she heard a small child’s fractious cry.
She looked up to see a woman of her age or a little younger trying to manoeuvre her way around the handbag displays. At first Cat couldn’t believe that her precious child-free weekend was being intruded upon, and then she noticed that the woman was doing her best to ignore her son as she browsed the shelves. The boy, who looked around two years old, was flailing around, getting increasingly frustrated at his mother’s lack of attention.
‘Oh do be quiet, Caspar,’ hissed the woman. ‘Can’t you let Mummy have one second to herself?’
Cat looked over and noticed the dark shadows under the woman’s eyes and air of exhausted impatience. The child looked similarly worn out and was squirming in his pushchair, turning round to look back to where they had come from. Cat followed his line of vision and spotted a forlorn toy monkey over by the escalator. Without thinking she hurried over, scooped up the toy and carried it back to the now inconsolable child.
‘Did you lose this?’ she asked, holding it out to him.
The little boy was stunned into silence, his face awash with snot and tears. He gazed up at Cat and reached out his pudgy hands. ‘Bobo!’ he cried with a gummy smile, clutching the toy to his chest.
The woman turned with a suspicious frown, which soon dissolved into a look of grateful relief when she realised what Cat had done. ‘Oh thank you so much,’ she said, hurrying over. ‘I had no idea he’d dropped it.’ She glanced at the handbag she was holding and then back at Cat. ‘You must think I’m a terrible mother.’
> ‘Not at all,’ said Cat. ‘Everyone needs a treat sometimes,’ she added, gesturing at the bag. ‘That one’s gorgeous.’
The woman’s face broke into a relieved smile. ‘Yes, we do, don’t we? Is that what you’re doing? Treating yourself while someone looks after your kids?’
Cat looked down at the purse she was still holding. ‘Er yes. The kids are with their dad.’ It was only a half-lie. ‘Have a lovely day,’ she said turning to leave. ‘Bye, Caspar,’ she added, smiling at the little boy.
‘Bobo!’ He grinned, holding up his beloved tatty toy.
‘And Bobo.’ Cat smiled. She carried the purse to the till and was about to reach for her Gold Amex when she had a change of heart. ‘I’m going to go away and think about it,’ she said to the shop assistant.
‘Very good, madam.’ The woman nodded.
Cat spent the rest of the day wandering around London, letting its bustling commotion wash over her but feeling disconnected from it. She phoned Ava to arrange breakfast the next day; she had wanted to re-engage with her old world. She felt as if a door had closed and she wasn’t sure if she would find the key to open it again.
‘I went shopping yesterday,’ Cat said finally.
Ava looked relieved. ‘Retail therapy never fails eh?’
‘Absolutely.’ Cat nodded.
A few hours later, Cat found herself standing outside her brother’s house, her hand poised ready to ring the bell. She had made the decision to come here but she couldn’t quite work out why. After she left Ava, it seemed like the right thing to do. It wasn’t that Cat wanted to see the kids – quite the contrary – but she knew that she didn’t want to go home either. Without her job to underpin her existence, the prospect of going back to an empty flat and spending an afternoon on social media seemed like a mistake.
Cat couldn’t quite believe that she was seeing it in these terms; social media had long been the backbone of her existence – a daily habit as natural as brushing her teeth – but somehow it didn’t fit with the new order of things. It also reminded her of what she was missing. Easy banter was fine if you had someone to share it with, and the thing about social media and the PR world was that it worked in cliques. You were either in or you were out. Unfortunately for Cat, she was out at this moment and wouldn’t be back in until the cliques said so. It was harsh but that was how it was.
Cat also knew that she wouldn’t have a hope in hell of rejoining this world until Jesse had persuaded Donald to let her back and after her conversation with Ava, she was doing her best to dismiss the nagging feeling that Jesse might be lying to her. Their relationship had always been built on a combination of good humour, straight-talking and trust, but Cat was starting to wonder if he was merely telling her what she wanted to hear. Still, Jesse was her only hope so she had to keep believing in him, if only for her own sanity.
She pressed the bell firmly and there was a pause before Ellie squawked, ‘I’ll get it!’
This was shortly followed by a male voice, which Cat didn’t recognise immediately, calling, ‘I think you better let me answer it, in case it’s a mad axe murderer.’
The door opened and Cat nearly turned on her heels as Finn stood before her with a wide grin on his face. ‘Oh yes, it is a mad axe murderer, see?’ He stepped back to let Ellie and Daisy get a better look.
Ellie giggled as if Finn had made the best joke ever. ‘That’s not an axe murderer. It’s just Cat.’
Finn peered at her for a second. ‘Oh yes, so it is. You never can tell though,’ he added, winking at the girls.
Cat rolled her eyes. ‘Is there any chance I could come in, please?’
Finn and Ellie exchanged glances. ‘She did say please,’ observed Daisy.
Finn patted his niece on the head. ‘Very true. In that case, you may,’ said Finn giving a swooping bow and taking a step back so that Cat could enter.
‘Please don’t feel you have to put on a show for my benefit,’ said Cat, walking into the hall. ‘I wanted to see Andrew really.’
‘Sorry to disappoint you but I’m afraid he’s out,’ replied Finn, his smile dissolving.
‘Oh, right,’ said Cat peering into the living room and noticing a tea party set up on the floor. ‘Well I don’t want to intrude.’
‘Come and have some tea,’ said Ellie.
Cat looked at her niece and saw something imploring in her eyes. This was new. ‘All right,’ she heard herself say. She let the small girls lead her into the living room and took a seat on the sofa.
‘No, you have to come and sit on the blanket,’ said Daisy sternly.
Cat glanced at Finn. ‘I’m game if you are.’ He grinned.
Of course you are, thought Cat irritably. She would never have come if she’d thought that this was how her afternoon was going to pan out.
‘Tea?’ asked Ellie.
‘Yes please,’ said Cat. Ellie poured some liquid from the teapot into a tiny china cup and handed it to Cat.
‘What do you say?’ demanded Ellie.
‘Thank you,’ said Cat, trying to ignore Finn’s idiotic grin.
Ellie nodded and did the same for everyone else. She picked up her own cup and saucer, her pinkie raised delicately in the air. ‘And now we drink,’ she commanded.
Cat watched as Finn took a sip and did the same. She winced as she tasted orange squash that had been diluted with the merest dribble of water. ‘Delicious,’ croaked Cat.
Ellie seemed satisfied and picked up a plate. ‘Biscuit?’ she asked and then leant over to whisper. ‘But don’t eat them because they’re made of plasticine.’
Cat was grateful for the heads-up. She took one and pretended to eat it. ‘Nom, nom, nom – lovely!’ she declared.
Ellie beamed with pleasure. Cat noticed that Finn was watching her with a smile – judgemental so and so. ‘Now, girls, why don’t you go out into the garden for a bit and I’ll make Cat a real cup of tea.’ The girls leapt up and ran happily towards the back door.
Finn turned to Cat. ‘You’re a natural at parties,’ he said.
She stared at him assuming that this was another jibe. ‘Is that a dig about the world I come from?’ she asked defensively.
He sighed. ‘No, it was actually meant as a compliment.’
‘Oh.’
He turned to her, his face serious for once. ‘Look, Cat, I think we might have got off on the wrong foot.’
‘I don’t know what you mean.’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘Oh I think you do. You think I’m a know-it-all because I’m good at dealing with kids and you think I’ve got a downer on the world you come from.’
‘Haven’t you then?’
Finn held up his hands. ‘Only as much as you’ve got a downer on my world.’
‘That’s not true.’
‘Listen, we’re quite different people but I’m here to tell you that I think you’re doing a good job with the kids. It’s not easy.’
‘Thank you, Supernanny.’
Finn frowned. ‘Jeez, you can’t take a compliment, can you?’
‘Not when it’s delivered with a healthy dose of patronising condescension.’
‘Fine. Pardon me for trying to give you a bit of encouragement.’
Cat turned to face him. ‘I don’t need life tips from Peter flipping Pan,’ she snapped. ‘I mean, what is your problem? Can’t you relate to adults or something?’
‘Well I admit, I’m having problems at the moment,’ said Finn staring into her eyes.
Cat could tell that he was doing his best to suppress a smile and it infuriated her even more. ‘And what’s so bloody funny all the time? Can’t you take life seriously for once?’
‘Can’t you find life funny for once?’ he retorted.
Cat scowled at him. ‘You’ve got an answer for everything, haven’t you?’
‘And you haven’t?’
They heard the front door slam following by Charlie storming upstairs. ‘And stay in your room until I tell you!’ shouted Andrew. Moments la
ter he appeared in the doorway to the living room and seemed surprised and then amused to see Cat and Finn sitting cross-legged on the floor. ‘Having a nice time?’ he teased.
Embarrassed, Cat leapt to her feet. ‘Is Charlie okay?’ she asked, changing the subject.
Andrew sighed. ‘Let’s just say that the father-son bonding didn’t go quite to plan,’ he said, reaching over to kiss her. ‘Anyway, this is nice surprise. I didn’t expect to see you on your day off. Everything okay?’ he added, glancing at Finn and then back at his sister.
Cat held his gaze. ‘Everything’s fine,’ she lied. ‘I was just passing so – ’
Andrew leant forwards and murmured, ‘You are allowed to come and see your family without an excuse, you know, and I’m glad you did.’
Cat knew that if she stayed she might cry so she took a deep breath and said, ‘Look I should be going. I’ve got a busy day tomorrow looking after these really annoying children.’
As she walked into the hall, she was almost bowled over by Ellie, dashing in from the back garden. ‘Oh are you going?’
‘I have to,’ lied Cat. ‘But I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘Oh goody because me and Daisy want to go to the park again. Not the usual park – the big one with all the cool stuff.’
Cat’s heart sank. Another day with Daisy meant another day with Finn and she couldn’t bear the thought of it. ‘Actually I was thinking that we might go somewhere, just the three of us,’ said Cat, wracking her brains.
‘Where?’ asked Ellie.
‘The cinema?’
Ellie thought for a moment. ‘Can Daisy come?’
‘I think you might be fighting a losing battle,’ murmured Andrew.
Cat glanced at Finn who was staring at the ceiling. ‘Fine. The park it is then.’
She made her way to the door without a backward glance. Andrew walked her to her car. ‘Are you sure you’re okay, sis?’
She smiled brightly at him and climbed into the car. ‘Of course. I’m always okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.’
He nodded. ‘And Cat?’
She looked up at him. ‘Mmhmm?’