by Travis Bughi
He never did apologize for his words, and Takeo struck up where they’d left off once the stew had been eaten.
“So, like I was saying,” Takeo said, “I don’t need help with the fighting. What I need is information.”
“What kind, my friend?” Lei replied.
“I need to know what’s going on in the world. I spoke to Mako, from our old village—”
“Ah, yes, I remember her. How could I forget such beauty?”
Ehuang punched Lei in the shoulder hard enough that he jumped.
“Yes, her,” Takeo continued. “She told me she heard that Katsu is winning the war. Jiro is steadily being conquered while the Old Woman of the Mountain does nothing.”
“She heard correct.” Lei nodded. “Or rather, she’s heard what we’ve heard, all except one minor difference.”
“And what would that be?” Emily asked.
Lei paused and looked at her, his hesitation notable, before he turned to respond to Takeo as if the samurai had asked the question.
Oh no, Emily lamented. Don’t tell me I’ve pissed him off, too! She didn’t need more enemies. It was frustrating enough to have to ignore Ehuang’s snide looks. Was she really so hopeless here? Emily made a mental note to question Takeo about it later. She was offending far too many people, far too often.
“Jiro was steadily being conquered,” Lei stressed. “That has changed in these past few months, but it seems the truth of that hasn’t reached the ears of commoners yet.”
“What changed?” Takeo asked. “Did Xuan ally herself with him?”
“No, the Old Woman remains unmoved like the mountain she rests upon. Jiro has found new allies, though. He has somehow enticed the oni and akki to join his cause.”
Takeo’s jaw dropped, and Emily sat up straight.
“Say that again,” Takeo asked.
“The oni and akki are fighting for Lord Jiro against Lord Katsu,” Lei repeated, “and they are doing quite well if the battles we watch are anything to go off. The akki are rather pitiful against samurai, as one would expect, but they tend to do more around the camp such as carrying supplies and running messages. The oni, though, they are a real presence, let me tell you. They rival Katsu’s mounted komainu easily, not in mobility, of course, but in their strength.
“And they fight in more than just his armies, too. On Jiro’s behalf, they’ve gone off on their own to destroy Katsu’s supply lines and attack his unprotected lands. I hear it’s becoming more than a thorn in Katsu’s side. I hear that it’s turning the war, and if things continue, some of the daimyo may switch allegiance to Jiro.”
Takeo and Emily went still and made eye contact.
“Supply lines?” Takeo said. “You mean the villages?”
Lei hesitated and then said, “Well, yes, that’s where all daimyo get their resources from. The oni are focusing on one daimyo at a time, torching the land until he or she defects to Jiro or at least withdraws their samurai from Katsu’s host. They’ve turned two, so far, which is rather impressive, considering how vindictive Katsu can be. The oni must be being rather ruthless, but that’s also what one would expect.”
Lei’s voice trailed off when he saw Emily and Takeo were still sharing an intense gaze. The rain pattered around them in a never-ending cascade while Emily waited for Takeo to ask the question. He did soon enough.
“Where can Emily and I go to speak in private?” Takeo asked.
“Honestly? Nowhere near. This is a camp of ninjas. However, if it’s the illusion of privacy you seek, you’ll find that just outside the camp.”
“That’ll do, I think,” Emily said and then rose.
She swept up her weapons and exited the tent, Takeo following with katana in hand. They passed through the camp—already alive and at work again in the dreary morning rain—and over the hill as Lei had said. Emily looked around and saw no one, but she took Lei’s words as truth. She did not expect to see ninjas so easily, but it was worth a try to look for them.
“Damn it!” Emily shouted once they’d stopped. “Those were Jiro’s oni at the camp. They killed everyone on his command. Damn it! Now I want Katsu to defeat him!”
Takeo found a rock to sit on and hunched over, his wet hair falling around his face to drip water on the soaked ground. Emily leaned against a tree opposite him, furiously digging her sandals into the mud.
“Sometimes I hate Juatwa,” he muttered, “likely because I dislike war. Juatwa is war.”
“What are we going to do?” Emily asked. “Wasn’t that our plan, to join Jiro and help him defeat Katsu?”
Takeo nodded and lifted his head, giving it a shake to clear the wet strands of hair from his face.
“How can we do that now?” she continued. “He . . . he’s using oni. He . . . your village, they’re all dead because of Jiro. That . . . this can’t be right. We can’t be a part of that. What about Xuan? Could she defeat them both? Can we join her?”
Takeo locked eyes with hers and held a harsh gaze, only blinking to clear the rain that dripped down his lashes. His face was calm, as always, hiding the anger she knew he felt, but he let her see his soul, and she felt a heavy stab to her heart.
“Xuan will defeat no one,” Takeo said, putting words to what his eyes had told her. “She has the smallest force and is too old. Whoever wins will have more than two thirds of Juatwa to wield against her. She is biding her time because she’s going to ally herself with the winner of this war. If Jiro does not defeat Katsu, no one will, and Lucifan will be put to the sword, just like my old village.”
It was true, so horribly true. It rang so clear that Emily couldn’t even deny it as a gut reaction. Despite the rain and the moist air, her throat went dry, and she swallowed a mouthful of saliva. Takeo did not break his gaze with her, and through those dark eyes, she saw her own naiveté.
Katsu would be no better than Jiro, and Jiro was no saint simply because he opposed Katsu. Both Shogun would be ruthless, killing the allies of the other by whatever means necessary to ensure victory. They might be virtuous themselves, perhaps stopping the slaughter of a young child in their presence, but their troops would not show such restraint. Jiro’s oni and akki killed just as indiscriminately as Katsu’s komainu, and the people would suffer until a victor stood tall.
This was the way of it, the way it had always been in Juatwa.
This was war.
“We don’t have a choice, do we?” Emily asked.
She felt lightheaded all of sudden and took a seat on the rock beside Takeo. It was a small one, so she could only sit on half of it and lean against Takeo, leeching the heat from his skin. To her dismay, he did not wrap an arm around her shoulders.
“People, many innocent people, even children, are going to die no matter whom we fight for, or even if we don’t fight at all, aren’t they?” she continued. “Whether by oni or samurai, blood will run. Why, why is this such a surprise to me? Why didn’t I see this coming?”
Takeo clasped his hands in front of him and bowed his head. Despite the way her words formed into questions, he respected the fact that they were not directed toward him.
“How stupid am I?” She shook her head. “What did I think this was going to be? What fantasy was I living in?”
Despite sitting down, her heart continued to weigh heavy, her knees felt weak, and her mind clouded. Her purpose, once so strong, was crushed under the weight of reality. She could see it now, all of it, the ugliness of the world, and it frightened her more than she wanted to admit.
Takeo opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it and sighed. She saw this and turned to him, ready to receive help.
“I don’t know if I can get past this,” Emily said, begging. “I don’t want any part of this. How could Quartus want this from me?”
“Emily,” he said, stopping her ramblings.
Her name sounded sweet coming from him. She leaned toward him to hear the sound better.
“Have you ever wondered why Quartus didn’t do all
of this himself?” Takeo asked.
Emily blinked, and her lips parted.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, Quartus was an angel, right?” Takeo stated. “You told me the colossi obeyed his command?”
Emily nodded, eyes wide, as she dared to hope that Takeo could lead her through this horror of doubt.
“Well, did you ever stop and wonder why he didn’t just send a colossus to destroy Katsu? All it would have taken was one colossus and one command, and all of this would have been put to an end. He was an immortal angel, right? Why didn’t he just grab up a sword and destroy Drowin before he got the basilisk poison? His shining eyes could kill any vampire. Also, for that matter, if it was so important that Heliena die, why didn’t Quartus just do it himself? You told me how he appeared out of nowhere to save you at those docks, so why didn’t he appear out of nowhere and end all this trouble before it began. In other words, have you ever wondered why he picked you?”
Emily’s mouth closed, and her eyes narrowed. What was he getting at? She could almost punch him for asking such a stupid question. Of course she’d wondered that! She’d spent countless, sometimes sleepless nights wondering why she’d been burdened with this task and many more wondering how she could have been so important that he’d sacrificed himself for her. It ate at her like a disease, picking away at her patience until she would ball up her fists and slam the closest thing. It had never made any sense at all, and she felt so burdened by debt that it pained her.
“You know I have,” she said, letting agitation stain her tone.
“Did you ever think,” Takeo replied carefully, “that Quartus didn’t do those things because he couldn’t?”
Emily balked. That was something she’d never thought of—ever.
As Emily’s annoyance vanished into surprise, Takeo continued, “Perhaps, as an angel, he was incapable of such acts. You told me the angels are beings of good, and they embody trust and love. Those acts I described, though? There is nothing kind about them. They would be brutal—justifiable, but brutal—and maybe that was why Quartus did not do them. I think, Emily, you need to stop and realize that the reason Quartus gave his life to you is because he knew that one day you’d have to make a tough decision like this; something he could never do.”
Emily’s jaw made a slow descent as Takeo’s words laid into her, so soft in tone, yet so harsh in their rationale. Once again, a cold rush of realization washed through her mind. She could not be certain Takeo’s words were true, but the more she thought about them, the more they made sense.
“That’s why he never chose a knight,” Emily said, voice barely above a whisper. “They have a promise and an oath to uphold and an honor to keep. I’ve always wondered about that, why he didn’t choose a knight. Maybe that’s why he chose me, too, over any of the other amazons. I wasn’t really an amazon when he met me, and perhaps he saw that I would leave them, like one would need to do in order to follow Heliena to Katsu. A gunslinger would never work either. They are nothing without their guns. I can’t believe it. It, it’s true. Oh, damn it! It’s true!”
She buried her face in her palms and screamed into them. She cursed herself over and over and over again. Why hadn’t she thought of that? It was obvious now, so painfully obvious that it shattered her confidence all over again. How could she be so blind to what Takeo had clearly seen after knowing her only a few short months? Was she so feebleminded?
“Damn it, I’m such an idiot,” she whispered, her eyes turning wet.
“What?” Takeo said. “What do you mean?”
“Why am I so useless?” she continued. “I couldn’t figure that out. Why couldn’t I figure that out for myself? I think of nothing. All I do is rely on other people to save me. Adelpha, Gavin, that treant, Mosley, merfolk, both my brothers, now you. I’m nothing without others. I can’t fix anything myself. I fail; that’s all I do. The only time I was alone was when Chara died, and I died, too! I’m such a failure! Why didn’t Quartus see that, huh? Was he really so desperate? Was there really no one else? I’m going to lose here, too. I know it; I just know it. Damn it all! I hate this! I HATE this!”
She lashed out from where she sat on the rock and kicked the tree she’d once leaned against. Instant, painful regret whipped up her leg, but she didn’t care. She kicked again, then again, but stopped when her heel went numb.
Is that true? A soft voice in her head broke through the cloud of anger. Do you really hate this?
No, she realized. She did not. It had been her choice to come here, her decision. She’d wanted to travel and see the world long before Quartus had given her a reason. She loved to learn and acquire new skills, to meet new people and see old ones. She was angry at herself. That was all. She was angry because, in order to defeat Katsu, she would have to join Jiro’s forces and turn a blind eye to the oni he hired.
And that made her stomach turn.
“You’re too hard on yourself,” Takeo said.
“I know,” she replied, head hung low, “but I don’t know how not to be.”
She looked at the tree she’d kicked and felt a twinge of regret. That tree had done nothing to her. It was just another innocent victim of Juatwa’s never-ending war. She leaned against it, thankful it was not as fickle as her. Takeo watched her from the rock.
“How do you do it, then?” Emily asked. “We’re going to join Jiro when it was his oni that murdered your village. How can you do it? Why is it you are convincing me, rather than the other way around?”
“Honestly?” he replied, their eyes meeting. “You were not raised by my brother.”
“Was he really so harsh?” she asked.
Takeo averted his gaze, and Emily regretted her choice of words. Still, though, the urge to know was too strong.
“How are you not more like him?” she asked. “The way you tell it, Okamoto was dark and cold. How come you aren’t the same way?”
“I’m not?” he asked back.
For once, his face was not placid. His eyes went wide, his lips parted, and his eyebrows lifted. Emily smiled and shook her head.
“Hm, I thought I was,” he said.
She shrugged. “Well, you’re not. Why?”
Takeo ran a hand through his short, rain-drenched hair. As he did so, bright rays began to pierce through the dark clouds above, though the water still fell about them. Takeo and Emily looked up to the sky, squinting through both the light and the rain. As the sun touched her skin, Emily hoped it would warm and dry her, but knew it wouldn’t. The rain was not done yet.
Takeo stood up and stretched his back. Emily pushed off the tree to stand unassisted.
“I’m not really sure, to tell you the truth,” Takeo said, “but I promise to tell you when I figure it out. Now, are you ready to join a war?”
“No,” Emily replied. “I’m ready to finish one.”
Chapter 17
After speaking with his master, Lei sent the two nameless ninjas off to find Lord Jiro and deliver Takeo’s request to join his army. This was a generous act, and both Takeo and Emily were beyond gracious in their thanks. They had expected nothing more than a point in Jiro’s direction and a best-of-luck farewell, but Lei said he would not have it so. He claimed that a samurai of Takeo’s skills deserved a proper introduction, and as they thanked him again, he waved them off. The conversation then turned toward what they would do while they waited, and Lei challenged Takeo to the promised duel.
They squared off in what served as a courtyard for the camp. Rain was still falling, the mud now slick and drenched, yet a few feeble rays of light broke through the clouds to shine down on the area. Ehuang sat close—any closer and she would have joined the fight. Emily hesitated to join her—she didn’t want to offend—and then chose to sit just behind her. It was close enough, and other ninjas came to join them.
Maybe five in all came slowly and quietly from their tents to watch the duel. Many more kept to their tasks with only occasional glances in Takeo and Lei’s direction.
The samurai and ninja had taken up wooden swords, both the length of a wakizashi, and now circled each other, keeping a couple paces’ distance between them.
Emily watched as both men slid their feet through mud with every step, pushing the sludge out of the way and grinding the front of their sandals down into the ground. It seemed to help them balance, for neither slipped. They looked quite the stark pair, Takeo in his stained white kimono facing off against Lei in his black suit. As tense as their bodies seemed, Lei began to taunt Takeo quite confidently.
“I’m surprised you didn’t ask for a katana,” he called out.
Takeo shrugged. “I don’t want you to have any excuse for when I beat you.”
“Ha! More like an excuse for you,” Lei said, tilting his wakizashi down and back. “I can hear you already, saying I only won because you’re not practiced with a ninja weapon. Perhaps you’d be more comfortable if I challenged you to drink tea properly?”
The ninjas seated around Emily grinned, and one of them even chuckled.
“I’m not that kind of samurai,” Takeo replied. “Don’t you see? I’m a ronin now.”
He swung his head and his hair flew, sending drops to rain down around him, and Lei crouched, bending at the knees. Emily throat tightened.
She felt the burn of her curiosity again and, against her better judgment, chose not to resist it. She slid forward in the mud until she was next to Ehuang. Despite the obvious noise and exaggerated movements this made, the ninja did not turn to acknowledge the newcomer.
“Can I ask you a question?” Emily whispered.
“You just did,” Ehuang replied, tone flat.
Emily frowned but shrugged it off. She’d been the object of unjustified hate before; she could handle it again. She thought a moment before asking again, though. Neutrality always seemed the best way to diminish hostility.
“Can I ask you two more questions?” Emily pressed.
Ehuang’s eyes narrowed into tiny slits, and she gave a sigh that was dangerously close to a growl.