“Alright,” Malcolm settled them. “I need your help with something. And it means we’ll be going back home tonight.”
The others were happy to hear that news. “What do you need us to do?”
“I went over to the human’s house last night and he showed me a weapon that will be used to kill that monster snake.” The raccoons gasped. “Only he intends to have ‘King Mac’ involved in the operation.”
“Are you kiddin’ me?” Zeke said in disbelief. “That little dog couldn’t hurt a cat!”
“I hate cats…” Malcolm muttered, then collected himself. “So what I want us to do is sneak into the boy’s house and bring back that weapon into the woods!” His eyes got huge.
“What if we get caught, Malcolm?”
“He told me they’ll all be gone until tonight. And I know exactly how to get in. But if for some odd reason they do come back and catch us…hey, we’re raccoons! This is what we’re supposed to do! Am I right or am I right?” They laughed. “We should leave here pretty soon. Why don’t you guys go keep watch on the human’s house. But make sure you’re not seen if they come out. I’ll tell Jonah what’s going on.”
BENJAMIN SLEPT LATE. Carol had to bang on his bedroom door and tell him they were leaving for church in fifteen minutes. He had no time to get the newspaper. He threw on his clothes and wet down his sandy-blonde bed head. As he tucked in his shirt in the bathroom door mirror, he went over in his mind everything that would happen in his schedule that day.
Okay, first church…then the family reunion…
He poured a handful of water on the back of his head to plaster the few wild hairs that refused to lie down.
I’ll get the fireworks from Jon, then Mom and Dad will take me to the Harvest Home Festival where.… He took a deep breath, imagining the smell of Jessica’s hair. The Watermelon Queen will hang out with me all night. Was there something else?
He smacked his forehead with his palm.
Duh! Mac is being crowned king tonight!
He pondered giving away his collar. “He is Pugsly’s son, but I do kinda wish Jonah was king instead.”
His mom hollered at him and the Biggses drove down the driveway. A light breeze still blew through the window downstairs.
“ALRIGHT, MALCOLM, what is this about?” Jonah looked him straight in the eye.
Zeke scampered up to them. “Malcolm! Malcolm! The boy and his family just left!”
Malcolm’s eyes darted all around. “Okay, Zeke. Let’s go.” Malcolm started to run, then turned back. “Look, I’ll be back soon. Don’t worry. Everything’s going to work out just fine. You’re going to be a hero!” He winked and disappeared into the tunnel.
“…‘Coons.” Jonah sighed.
FIVE BLACK MASKS peeked through the large basement window. “Alright, fellas. Stand back.” Malcolm jumped up and grabbed the top lip of the window sill with a claw. Holding on tightly he got the rest of his claws on it and gave it a yank. It swung down, carrying him to the ground. “Voila!” He presented the opening with stretched out arms.
“Nice work, Malcolm!”
“Now, just follow me.” Malcolm stepped onto the window pane and jumped off onto the card table, then to the floor.
Zeke was next…then one of them gasped. “They’re back! Hurry!” Zeke jumped in, the other three behind him.
“Oh, no! Oh, no! What’ll we do?”
They could hear the car door open and Carol’s voice. “I’ll only be a minute. I don’t want to show up without an extra crock pot.” The front door opened and loud steps crossed the ceiling, growing louder as she made her way down the stairs. Zeke stood frozen in fear. Malcolm grabbed him and pulled him under the card table with the others. “Don’t move!” his lips enunciated.
Carol came around the corner, singing off key. She crossed the room and opened the storage next to Benjamin’s bedroom. Her singing got louder, and worse, as she moved old boxes and items out of the way that had never sold at garage sales. Malcolm and Zeke held their paws over the mouth of another for fear he would burst out laughing. When she came back into the main room, a gust of wind cooled her. “Oh, Benjamin!” She stomped over to the card table and set the crock pot down. The raccoons shivered. Carol grabbed a hooked stick and pulled the window shut, snapping the latch into place. Then she grabbed her crock pot and went upstairs.
“Whew!” Malcolm said, relieved. “That was a close one.”
“I think bullfrogs can sing better than her!” Zeke puckered his lips, “Mmm, maybe not.”
They watched the Biggs’s car drive back down the driveway. “Okay, it’s this way.” Malcolm led them into Benjamin’s room. The morning light through his little window lit the room enough to see. The four raccoons gasped at the “pig” sitting against the back wall.
“What is that thing?!”
“That, gentlemen, is what Jonah and I are gonna use to kill the snake.”
“How?”
“You’ll see!” Malcolm pointed inside the hollow barrel. “Looky here. He’s got these weird things that you can talk into and your voice comes out the other side.”
Zeke climbed on top of Benjamin’s desk and grabbed the other walkie-talkie. “This, Malcolm?”
“Yeah, that’s the other one.”
“How do they work?”
“I dunno. It’s weird human stuff.”
Zeke played with it, pressing a few buttons—including the “on” button—then put it down.
“I’m not worried about those things. We just need this!” Malcolm knocked his knuckles on the wooden side.
“Are you sure we can carry it?” Zeke tinkered with the hatch and caused it to close.
“Well, let’s give it a try.” They all took a place around the Trojan Pig and found they could lift it with ease. “This isn’t so bad!”
The five of them carried it out of Benjamin’s room and over to the card table. They put it down and stared up at the window Carol had closed.
“Uhhhh…” Zeke reflected. “Any idea how we’re going to get out?”
Malcolm climbed onto the card table and stood as tall as he could. He tapped his little fist on the glass. It felt breakable. He jumped down and started looking around.
“What are you looking for?”
He ignored the others and searched the carpet along the wall. “Aha! This’ll do!” He held up a shiny, blue-swirled marble that never got vacuumed up and moved away from the window. He snickered. “You guys better stand back. This could get messy!” They took refuge behind him and watched their friend swing his arm back, then forward in a blur. Crash! Shards of glass flew everywhere, inside the room and outside on the grass above.
“Nice shot!”
Malcolm turned around and smiled. “Now, let’s get this thing outta here.” They tipped the barrel onto the card table and heaved it through the broken window, snapping off a few long shards still stuck in the sill. Then they hopped out and scurried across the front yard, the Trojan Pig above their heads. They hid it behind the hedge trees on the other side of the road. “Okay, that wasn’t so bad. Now just wait here. I’m gonna go get our little friend, King Jonah.” Malcolm hopped into the fox den.
Jonah stood alone in a corner watching his brother talk to the new residents of the kingdom. The arrogant look on Mac’s face made Jonah want revenge. I could tell those gawking squirrels about his little bed-wetting problem when we were pups….
Someone grabbed Jonah by the back leg. He spun around.
Malcolm grinned with excitement. “Come on! I wanna show you something!”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Cousin Jon’s Paper Sack
CHURCH WAS DISMISSED AT NOON. “Good sermon, today,” Tom said, hoping Carol and Benjamin had forgotten the few times he’d snored out loud.
Benjamin was pleased with the service, though all he remembered was Reverend Landreth boastfully announcing he’d win back his blue ribbon for the heaviest pumpkin. Some folks coughed out “Cheater!” causing the congregati
on to laugh.
The Biggses went to the grocery store to grab a few last things for the family reunion at the town park. The only thing on Benjamin’s mind, besides Jessica Howell, was the sack of fireworks his cousin Jon would be bringing.
JONAH STOOD AMONG THE RACCOONS, staring at the Trojan Pig in the hedge trees. “Okay, so what’s this?”
“This is what we’re gonna use to kill that monster snake!”
“The one whose skin we saw in the woods?” Jonah asked fearfully.
“Yes, the one terrorizing the entire forest. The reason all those new residents fled Persly’s Woods.”
“So, if we kill it…” Jonah thought out loud.
“…then you will be the hero!” Malcolm finished, opening his eyes wide.
Jonah smiled. “Yeah…I would be a hero. I would be the hero and my no-good brother would just be the king who sat there and did nothing.”
“And they’ll have no choice but to make you their king! So…” Malcolm exhaled loudly, “are you ready to go become a hero?”
“Yes!” Jonah’s face was full of determination. “L-let me go back inside and say something. I’ll be right back!” He jumped in the fox den hole.
“What’s he doing?” Zeke asked.
“I dunno. Probably gonna give his brother a kiss goodbye.” They laughed. “You boys ready to carry this thing for a while?”
“Where’s it going?”
Malcolm gritted his teeth with guilt. “Uh, to the eastern edge of Persly’s Woods.”
“What?!”
“We can make it. Don’t worry. You’ll be sleeping back in your soft grass beds tonight,” he reassured them.
JONAH HEARD LOUD TALKING in the cave. The loudest voice, of course, was Mac’s. He was talking to a group of ogling bunnies. Jonah coughed and got everyone’s attention. Mac turned. “Jonah, we’re not ready to crown me yet. That’s tonight. So you can go out and play with your little raccoon friends.” Some of the animals laughed.
Jonah glared. “Oh, I won’t be attending your crowning, so don’t wait up for me, okay?” He turned to leave, then stopped and addressed everyone. “Oh yeah, and don’t worry about that pesky monster that’s been eating up all of your friends in the forest. I’ll just go ahead and take care of it, since my brother won’t. Farewell!” Jonah stuck out his wimpy chest and dashed into the tunnel. Mac was dumbstruck.
Jonah popped out of the fox den and joined the raccoons. He had a mischievous smile. “Okay, let’s go!”
When the Biggses arrived at the park, the wind picked up. A few families were already there, but Benjamin didn’t see Jon. I sure hope he makes it soon! For another half hour he watched relatives arrive he’d never seen before. Finally to his delight, he recognized his Aunt Debbie’s face as she and his Uncle Phil got out of their car. Another person opened the door behind them. Benjamin smiled when he saw Jon’s brown, curly hair above the windshield. They clutched their food and sacks tightly. The wind was blowing anything it could away.
Jon walked up to Benjamin. “Couldn’t have picked a better day!”
“Nope!” Benjamin laughed, looking at his cousin’s sack. “Is that the—”
“Hamburger buns? Yeah, you asked me to bring hamburger buns, right? Here ya go!” Jon tossed him the sack of buns and plates, then beamed. “Oh, alright. They’re in the car. Give me a minute and I’ll grab ‘em.”
Benjamin felt antsy. Jon stopped to say ‘hi’ to everyone before they went to the car. Then Jon teased him by pulling out random things…an ice scraper, a road map. Finally he grabbed a large paper sack that bulged at the sides. “Paper or plastic?” He dropped it into Benjamin’s hands, causing his arms to give a little.
“Man! What did you put in here?!”
“I made those cherry bombs extra special!” Jon flashed his teeth as the wind blew his hair wildly.
“How many are in here?”
“Five.” His straight face almost cracked.
“Five?” Benjamin’s jaw dropped.
“You said you were gonna blow up a dinosaur. I figured three wouldn’t be enough!” Jon laughed and slapped Benjamin on the back.
“Wow! What else did you put in here?”
“Basically about five times more of everything than I gave you last time.” Jon perked up. “Oh! I also added something new this time. Let me look in there.” He rummaged and found what he was looking for—a square red, white, and blue box.
“What’s that?”
“Saturn Missiles. You ever seen ‘em?” Benjamin shook his head. “Fifty little screaming missiles shoot one-by-one out of the top of this!” He pointed at the top of the box and wiggled his hand around like a missile. “So if you happen to drop it after you light it,” A devilish smile came over him, “you’d better run like heck and pray it’s not pointed at you.”
“Cool!”
“Yeah, I put a couple of ‘em in there for ya.” He pushed the sack back into Benjamin’s hands. “Enjoy!”
Benjamin had what he wanted, and more. He envisioned the Trojan Pig being swallowed by the gargantuan snake, the fuse slowly shortening to detonation, and BOOM! He smiled as he put the sack in his parents’ car…as far under the seat as it would go.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
The Harvest Home Festival
THE SUN STARTED TO SET as the autumn day grew shorter. Jonah, Malcolm, and the raccoons had traveled across the pastures. Luckily the coyotes that survived the wild goats’ retaliation weren’t anywhere to be seen.
“So what exactly do you have planned?” Jonah asked Malcolm.
“I’ll tell you when we get there. You’re just gonna have to be patient. We’ll be there by tonight.” Malcolm huffed and puffed. Carrying the barrel was starting to get tiresome for all five raccoons. “Anyways, don’t complain. At least you’re not carrying this.”
In the tall grass they couldn’t see the western side of Persly’s Woods in the distance.
MAC GREW ANXIOUS for the moon to rise. He ran in and out of the tunnel to see how much farther the sun had dropped in the west. It was taking forever for night to fall.
Roscoe’s head poked out of the den. “Be patient, Your Majesty. You’ll be crowned soon. And then you’ll have so many problems you’ll probably wish you’d never got the job.”
“What problems?”
“Are you kiddin’ me? Whoop!”
“…Why do you do that?”
“I can’t help it. Anyway, haven’t you been listening? Didn’t you see that monstrous snake eat an armadillo back in Persly’s Woods a couple nights ago?”
“Uh…yeah, but that’s Persly’s Woods. That’s far, far away. I won’t have to deal with that stuff here. We’re safe!”
That comment disturbed the goat. “Oh, Your Majesty… I think you underestimate the situation.”
Zeus popped up next to Roscoe. “It’s getting close, My King.”
Roscoe sighed and dropped in the hole. They heard his words fade as he walked through the tunnel. “If you don’t act quickly you’ll be in for a big surprise…”
“What’s wrong with him?” Zeus asked.
“Oh, he’s jabbering on about that giant snake.”
“Wha-” Zeus’s eyes grew wide. “What about it?”
“He thinks it’s going to come all the way out here to attack us,” Mac snorted.
“So…what if it does?”
“Well, you heard my dumb little brother earlier. He said he’s going to go kill it!” Mac was starting to understand what Roscoe meant about problems. The pug and Doberman went inside to wait for the ceremony.
THE SUN DROPPED, and along with it the wind.
“Oh, sure! Right when it’s time to leave, the wind stops blowing!” Tom Biggs declared to his cousins, Bert and Janice. They smiled politely. They all hugged each other good-bye, Aunt Karen threw in one last drawn-out story about somebody’s appendicitis, and finally Benjamin Biggs was able to get in the car with his parents and leave.
He firmly shook Jon’s hand and
shut the car door, watching through his window as his cousin imitated lighting a roman candle and aiming it at him. Benjamin laughed. It was getting dark; clouds were building in the west and blocking the last of the sun.
Benjamin grabbed the back of his mom’s head rest and leaned forward between the two. “Now can we go to the Harvest Home Festival?”
“I thought that was next Sunday?” Tom said innocently, then guffawed.
“Yes, yes, we can go now.” Carol ignored her husband’s attempt at humor.
THE RACCOONS AND JONAH ENTERED PERSLY’S WOODS. The full, orange autumn moon teased them with glimpses of light behind the tall trees. The Trojan Pig got heavier but they continued east.
“Malcolm, which spring did you say this was going to?”
“I’m not positive where it’s at. I just know it’s close to the eastern edge of the forest.”
“Oh, that’s just great!”
“Listen, the Snapper said—”
“Malcolm, you got your information from the Snapper?!” Zeke nearly dropped his end of the Trojan Pig.
“Um…yeah.”
“Are you crazy?! This whole thing could be a setup!”
“No, he wasn’t lying about this. He said you could hear the cicadas and locusts sing really loud at the spring…louder than at any of the other springs.”
“Malcolm, open your ears! There’re locusts screaming everywhere! Okay…so let me get this straight. We need to take this thing—which is really hurting my back—to a spring clear on the other side of the forest that one of our oldest enemies told us we could find by listening to loud singing bugs?”
Malcolm was embarrassed. “Yes…”
“Oh, brother! If this is a joke you’re gonna have to tell Marlon we couldn’t make it to work today because we were carrying… Oh, just forget it! Let’s keep moving.”
The Rightful Heir Page 17