by Robin Roseau
It was eventually Cherish that crawled across the sands -- slowly, as her suit was stiff, but not fully disabled. Then she began dragging me for the cage.
"Seriously? Jasmine, she has to drag me to the cage? Seriously? I concede."
"Dark Skies, reset the Tutor's suit but no one else's."
A moment later, Cherish stood, stretched, then casually picked me up, carried me to the cage, and threw me in.
"Well done," I said.
She leaned closer. "I still want challenges."
"I'll play your game all you want, Cherish."
"Will you act as my Third?"
"I will."
"Thank you, Andromeda."
"Event over," Dark Skies declared. "Disabling all rifles. Resetting all suits."
But she didn't let me out of the cage. Everyone seemed to enjoy collecting at the front and laughing.
"Okay," said the Dutch woman. "You were right, Andromeda. That was fun. I wonder what privilege I have won."
"I'm sure it will be good," I said. "Is anyone going to let me out?"
"You look good in there," said another woman. I hadn't caught her name. "I'd grab you, but I think the Wookie will throw me in."
"Look, we have to show them the event, and I can't do that from in here!"
Well, it turns out, I could. The humans wanted to see it done, and they negotiated among themselves. And then they elected Julie to be the human representative. The three aliens conferred, and then Thick Fog took the alien position.
Everyone else took places to the side. Dark Skies pre-triggered a portion of the targets and called begin.
Julie held her own for a while, but the Wookie was quite good, and it took a few minutes before the force field pushed Julie into the cage with me. But she was laughing.
We hugged, awkwardly.
And then Dark Skies let us out.
* * * *
Julie lost her event the next day, but she went into it with a certain amount of confidence, and I thought she had fun. Ben was extremely gentle with her when he pulled her from the cage. They hugged, and she clung to him, so he picked her up and carried her from the arena.
She was crying, but I was sure they were tears of joy, not sorrow.
Ben let her steer challenge number two, the intellectual challenge, into a cooking contest. Julie was tickled pink. Ben lost badly, but they both had a good time, especially when they sat down to eat what she had made.
Their third challenge was to be physical again. We sat down to plan it. The grid had items in most branches that Julie could do with some sense of satisfaction, but it would also be easy to steer where Ben wanted.
He steered to a large arena. And then he steered for a hunt. When she realized that, Julie became morose, staring down at the table.
"Julie," Ben said, "what is wrong?"
"You told me you needed a win, that you needed me to do my best, or you would not feel as if we could become mated."
"That is true."
"I can't do this, Ben. You know I can't." She lowered her voice further. "You did this on purpose. You don't really want me."
"That isn't true," he said. "But I need a hunt, Julie. I need to find you, to capture you. This is my biology."
"You said you needed a challenge."
That was when I spoke up. "Julie, have I steered you poorly yet?"
She turned to me.
"I built this grid. The computer helped, but I made adjustments. And now you must trust me. Don't spend any more of your points and save them for now. Okay?"
"Okay," she said quietly.
They outlined a few more rules, and then we reached the handicap system. Ben had spent his points. Julie had nine remaining.
"Julie," I said. "You have nine points. You can use them to hamper Ben, but there might be one or two items that make you more competitive. Don't spend your points at all until you're sure."
It took her five minutes. Then she smiled. "Nine points. I get a laser rifle, and if Ben is within two hundred yards of me, my visor tells me where he is. And with my last point, I get a detailed topographical map of the arena."
"Which I am sending to you now," I said. "Can you read it?"
"Of course I can read it," she said. "He has to catch me, and he has twenty-four hours to do so."
"Yes, but after half of that, his visor will give him distances to you."
In other words, no matter what she did, he'd find her.
"But I get two hours to hide."
"Yes," I said. "You do."
She smiled. "This will be a good challenge."
She lost. Of course she lost. But she gave him a good challenge, and she kept him pinned down for nearly two hours at one point. I don't know if she let him get away at that point, or if he just managed to move enough every time she stiffened his suit and finally moved into cover.
She was crying when he caught her, but she clung to him tightly.
* * * *
Haruki's challenger was called Neon Blue. Haruki won her first one-on-one challenge against him, a jungle hunt.
She lost the second, but she acquired enough points in the playing that she was still ahead on points.
But in between the events, she went on three dates with Neon, her awarded privilege for the gracious play during the challenge play-off. At the end of the third date, she sent me a message. "Could I speak with you in person?"
That translated into a request to Jasmine. I was locked in my own cell for the night. "Ask her if I may be present."
I asked her to initiate a conference call, and a moment later, both their images appeared. Haruki looked between the two of us.
"Haruki," I said. "You know I am also a mating candidate, and I am unable to grant requests without permission."
"I didn't know you couldn't see me."
"I would like to know if I may be present," Jasmine asked. "I believe I know what you want, and Andromeda does not have authority to grant it. And I do not want the two of you to cheat. I believe I need to be there."
"Will you let me talk to her first, privately?"
Jasmine paused before answering. "Yes, all right. The guards are gone for the night. Andromeda, I will send you to her cell. I will have shackles delivered. You will escort her here. Haruki, you do not want to abuse Andromeda. It won't do you any good but a great deal of harm."
"I want to talk."
"You will come here, and I will give you privacy here. I do not want you talking down there. Andromeda, collect her, say as little as necessary, and come here."
"Will do," I said.
"Authorizing your cell door. I'll see you both soon."
"Could you put on some tea?"
"Yes."
I collected Haruki. She was sitting on the bed in her cell clothing. We were both in undies, camisole, and thin kimono. I thought she was amazingly lovely, and it was hard not to stare at her legs for a moment.
So I did.
She turned to look at me, and then I stepped forward. The cell opened a doorway then closed the moment I stepped inside.
Haruki pointed. "It arrived a minute ago, but I stayed here."
Her cell was identical to mine. I crossed to the nook and collected the shackles. "Jasmine, are you listening?"
"Yes."
"I don't know how to apply these."
"Wrap them around an ankle or wrist and they close automatically. Do her legs first while she's still on the bed, and I want her hands behind her back."
"I'm not going to make trouble," said Haruki. But she held her legs out. I knelt down and did the shackles. They were set really quite short, and she would have to shuffle. I looked up at her and shrugged.
"It's fine," she said. Then she rolled onto her stomach and offered her hands behind her back. I got them locked together then helped her from the bed.
I took her arm. I didn't have access to control her visor. "Jasmine, the visor."
"I'm already blinded," Haruki said.
"All right then." We stepped for
ward, and the cell let us out.
It was a slow walk. Haruki apologized twice. So did I. Then we both laughed, realizing it wasn't either of our fault.
"I'm dying to ask about your date, but I'm afraid if I do, Jasmine will punish both of us if you answer."
"She'd do that, wouldn't she?"
"She's put us both in the arena with a pack of rabid Lorises."
"I'm telling Bay you said that," Jasmine announced.
"He'd be the pack leader," I said. "Then he'd give us super soakers filled with robot food and threaten something truly dastardly if we didn't squirt each other."
"Robot food?"
"Nasty," I said. "They dropped me into a pit, filled it with robot food, and then let me out. Think molasses. Sticky, oh it was sticky. And the robots are the size of big ants, but some of them fly. And I was covered in it."
"Eww."
"Yeah. Big time."
"Were you freaked?"
"I screamed and went insane. I don't know how long I continued to scream even after they were done."
"Did they bite?"
"No, but imagine having about a million ants crawling on you."
"Nasty," she said. "Very nasty."
"Yeah."
We reached Jasmine's apartment, and the door opened as we arrived. Jasmine was waiting and directed us to the living room. There was tea waiting. She attended to Haruki's wrists, releasing them but binding them back in front of her, very close together. She and I both sat on the sofa, and I helped her with the tea.
"You are not being recorded," Jasmine said. "You will have to trust me, because I have no way to prove it. I will be in the next room, close enough to hear if you call in a firm voice, but not close enough to hear if you speak quietly. If the two of you conspire to cheat, I will figure it out, and you will not like my response. Bay's robot ants are not the worst thing I can do to you, but imagine four hours of that, Andromeda, with your mouth pried open."
"You don't have to threaten," I said. "You know that."
"No, I don't know that. You have conflicting interests."
"We won't conspire," Haruki said. "I have no desire to have robotic ants crawling everywhere."
"All right." And then Jasmine stepped away.
"So," I said quietly, then took a sip from my tea. "How was the date?"
"I like him, Andie," she said. "I really like him. And he's made such promises to me. I want to go. I want him to win. But I have enough points that unless I'm a complete idiot, I'll win our next challenge. And you said they need to win. It's in their biology. He won't want me if I beat him. I can even understand that. A Japanese man would lose face if his wife could beat him. I understand."
"And if you don't look like you're doing your best..."
"Then it's dishonest. I do not want a relationship based on dishonesty."
"Why couldn't you tell this to Jasmine?"
"She's an alien. She might tell him. I don't know. I trust you. I don't know about her."
"Well, there are solutions, and I think I know what she'll do about this, but she may not want to tell you. I don't know. But I think we should trust her and invite her in."
She studied my face. "You are sure?"
"I am sure. She told me she is not the sort of alien who lets mating candidates go. She's not going to let you go."
She smiled. "Invite her."
"Jasmine! We could use your wisdom."
She appeared in the doorway a moment later. "My wisdom?"
"I'm sucking up," I said. "Just in case you were in there thinking of nasty tricks the next time I'm in an event. Please sit. Have some tea."
She stepped into the room and took her own seat. There was a cup waiting for her, so I poured for her. She collected it and leaned back. "I already know what's wrong."
"Do you?"
"You are a deeply honorable woman and don't know how to throw your next event."
She lowered her gaze and nodded.
"Do you really think I'm going to let you win, Ms. Tsukino?"
"You told us we could win."
"You could," Jasmine said. "It happens. Most of the time it happens, it's because I know this would be a horrible match. Maybe I do not like the male. Maybe I just feel it is a poor match, and I am willing to let a candidate go to prevent the long term difficulty that would ensue if they become mated. But who makes the challenge grids, Ms. Tsukino?"
"I won my first and almost won my second."
"Proving you are a formidable mating candidate and worthy of Neon Blue. You will not win your third. Do you doubt me? He only needs one handicap. One. I don't care what event it is. One handicap. How well do you see in the dark? He sees into the infrared. Do you think I will let you win?"
"So you lied to us when you said we could win?"
"My sense of honor is different than yours," Jasmine replied. "I am willing to cheat to achieve the best final result. The final result for you is to lose your event, but to go down doing your best, isn't it?"
"Yes."
"Well then, are you going to be angry if I make sure that is what happens?"
Haruki smiled. "No. But it must be an honest competition! He must begin to feel mated. Won't he know that you cheated?"
"I won't have to cheat. It would be a real shame if you fell into the pit Andromeda mentioned a few minutes ago. Do you think you could maintain your focus with all those giant ants crawling on you? They look just like real ants, but if that's not enough, half of them can fly."
"Thousands," I said. I shuddered.
"If this were a poor match, or an indifferent match," Jasmine said, "Then we would provide a grid that is as fair as we can, and with your points, you would have a real chance. As is, we tried to be sure you lost the first challenge, but my assistant under-estimated your skills and made it too easy for you."
"Hey!" I said. "She earned that."
"She did," Jasmine said. She smiled. "Whatever your challenge is, you're going to have the fight of your life. But if it looks like you're about to win, I'll cheat. You may not see it. He definitely won't see it. Now, who wants some ice cream?"
"You're going to eat in front of her, Jasmine?"
"Are you upset by this conversation, Ms. Tsukino?"
"If we're having ice cream, could you call me Haruki?"
"Good." I heard an unzip.
"Don't scream," I said.
And the tentacles began poking out. Haruki stared, and soon they were on full display. Haruki stared, and then she turned to me. "Why would I scream?"
"Excellent question," I said. "What kind of ice cream do you have tonight, Jasmine?"
"I'm sorry, I only have vanilla."
"I like vanilla," I said. "Haruki, do you like vanilla?"
"I love vanilla."
"I'll retrieve it," Jasmine offered. "You two can talk about your date, Haruki."
"Do you need a hand?" I asked with a grin. Jasmine waved a tentacle at me. I turned to Haruki. "So. Good date?"
She leaned back on the sofa. "The best. The best, Andie."
"Tell me. Where did he take you? What did you both wear? Did you kiss? Do Greygreens even kiss?"
"Yes," she said. "As a matter of fact, they do." She looked at me. "Are they drugging me, Andie? I've never felt like this before, and... Are they drugging me?"
"Well, if they are, I don't know about it, but let me tell you about the Octal."
* * * *
She lost, but it was a little close for comfort. I think Jasmine cheated, but I didn't catch her. Haruki and Neon Blue certainly didn't. After the event, it was difficult to tell who was the most pleased.
* * * *
In the end, all my charges lost, but that wasn't surprising. They weren't all as happy as Julie and Haruki were. But most were accepting affection, and Jasmine told me that at this stage, that was the most important part.
"And that they lose."
"Oh please. I told you, I don't let mating candidates go. Just remember that."
Dates and Disap
pointments
Clover was able to go see Peony for four nights, returning very late on the fifth day. She came to me in my cell, pulled me to my feet, and hugged me for a good ten minutes. When I looked later, my back was deeply marked. I didn't care. I was nearly as happy about it as she was.
I had my event with the two Wookies. They hunted me as a pair, and I even gave them a run for their money. Oh, not a long run. I never got even close to the finish. But it was fun.
And then they proceeded to scare the shit out of me. The competition between them was to see who could get me to scream the longest. Not that I knew that going into it. Let me just say this: they were inventive.
Thick Fog won, but it took Dark Skies to calm me down at the end. Under her influence, I became, shall we say, quite agreeable, and it didn't wear off for hours. Thick Fog got her bath, and then the three of us stayed up late, the two of them touching me a great deal and me frustrated because there wasn't more than touching.
In the evening two days later, Soft Rain asked to meet with me in my cell. Together we sat on my bed facing each other. It was a little funny to see the Wookie sitting with her legs crossed.
Then she looked down at her hands and wouldn't look at me.
"Are you in love, Soft Rain?"
"Yes," she rumbled.
"Are you both my friends?"
"Yes," she said more loudly.
"Does she love you?"
"Yes."
"Good. You're good together."
She looked up. "We talked about asking you to be our third. It is not the same as the Tutor do. In fact, we don't really do that. But we thought we might want to keep you."
"You don't want me the way I want to be wanted," I said. "You want a pet human because I'm fun to play with."
"Are you mad?"
"I'd have been mad if you tried to force a relationship you didn't really want. We can still play, Soft Rain. Do you live on Earth?"
"No, but we visit sometimes. Not often."
"Well, I don't know where I'm going to be in six months. Who knows? We could become neighbors. I'll be disappointed if we aren't friends. I'll be disappointed if you didn't find ways to earn a bathing."
She rumbled. "I do enjoy that part."
"When are you leaving?"
"She's waiting for me now."