He was surprised. He talked to some of the other people then. They went inside the spaceship and came out with somebody else. I thought it was somebody else. It was a book inside three spacesuits. Teacher thought it was very smart of Candy to put the book inside three spacesuits. I don’t understand why that’s smart.
I like Teacher. I like the way he feels. He likes Candy. He was glad to get the book. He said now everything will be all right. I am glad.
Teacher is glad Candy is back. I am glad Candy is back. Mommy and Adam are glad too.
Terry is gladdest of all.
VOLUME III — Part Four
Epilogue
Pay attention now, Posterity; do not intend to repeat myself:
Positively last time I travel coach…!
Finally out of traction, thank you; and burns healing nicely. Haven’t required I.V. in better than month. Yesterday morning doctors (crème of AA medical community; all handpicked by, working under direction [gimlet eye] of, Teacher) even let me try walking — for first time since reentry. (Three, four months ago, I think. Maybe longer.) And no more Foley catheter; can go potty myself again — at last!
Truly was a mess:
More bones broken than intact. Epidermis essentially one large hematoma — which underlay widespread first-, second-degree burns. Also concussed. Etc. (Lots of “etc.”)
Pretty well out of things during initial weeks. Fortunately. Memory of that period consists primarily of impressions:
…Pain.
…Darkness.
…Intermittent awareness of intruding kindly hands, gentle for most part, but often doing things that hurt; fleeting hazy glimpses of faces; nearby voices speaking occasional hearty encouragement — frequent muffled sobbing in background.
…Adam. Swathed in bandages at outset. No idea when slept, if ever; but seemingly there every minute, quietly performing endless little chores required by intensive-care patient, or sitting at bedside, holding hand.
…And, of course, Terry. Don’t think twin slept any more than Adam. (That’s one possibility; other makes me nervous — Teacher promises study of phenomenon soonest possible opportunity.) Anyway, never opened eyes without finding brother peering intently from bedside stand, reaching out gently to nuzzle cheek, offer greeting: “Hello, baby! What’cha doin’…?”
Though personal universe limited in beginning to Pain, Presence Absence of, vaguely remember gaining impression baby brother moving more cautiously than usual — plus seemed to be wearing fuzzy white slippers. By time own condition improved to point where data registered as anomalous, footwear gone, irrepressible sibling madcap self again: dancing back and forth on, chinning upside down from, perch; wrestling endless with bell (lifelong obsession: clapper got in there; must come out); chattering merrily, singing, whistling, laughing, etc.
As well, once my recovery status permitted such, enjoying visitors (Terry so loves company). And we had lots: Vandenberg community census approaching 2,000 — must have seen each at least once during past months.
(The lengths some girls will go to, to be popular…)
Prognosis suggests complete recovery; no sequelae: no physical impairment, no motor/sensory dysfunction — no scarring from burns; not even hypopigmentation. (Was awfully lucky.)
Nor, happy to report, psychic trauma over killing Kyril…
Yes, regret necessity. Very, very much.
Sweet man. Bright, fun, good company. Also cuddly. Dear friend.
Gallant foe.
Miss him. Intensely.
But his job conflicted with mine. Mortally: Under circumstances, “him-or-me” synonymous with “them-or-us.”
Chose us.
And would again, thousand times over. Million times over! Along with entire tribe, root and stock…!
Genocide ugly concept. Not arguing point. But Khraniteli chose ground rules, set stakes. In no position to complain when plans backfire.
Teacher will do best to avoid massacre, of course. But equally certain: Will not expose tiny hominem population to slightest risk of another brush with extinction. Khraniteli who survive next encounter will be product of most careful screening imaginable — plus can expect to spend balance of days under tightest supervision.
Goodness… That’s enough for now. Suddenly it’s kind of tired out.
(Been sick, you know.)
Good night, Posterity.
Progress! Teacher studied x-rays, conferred with colleagues, pronounced repairs complete: skeleton intact, skin whole. Sent me home to family.
Which now includes Gayle. Kim, with Adam’s concurrence (ha!), asked if wished to move in with us. Did. So now have three sisters. Cozy, homey, fun. (More fun still: Adam badly outnumbered; stays rather distracted…)
Lisa has another new friend, by the way: small boy, approximately same age. Nice lad — despite growing up under handicap: Parents named him Leslie Vivian Sweet. But not teased about it. Possibly because first showed up several weeks ago — riding full-grown male Kodiak bear…!
Charming beast; answers to name of Baloo.
Leslie’s father zookeeper in San Diego. Baloo born at zoo but fell sick; had to be taken home for special nursing. Became Leslie’s constant companion for whole year. Attempted return to zoo utter failure: Both pined inconsolably for weeks. Zoo authorities, father finally yielded to inevitable: Baloo remained family member until Armageddon; protected small charge thereafter until stumbled onto hominem community.
No one has slightest fear of shaggy giant, despite obvious horrific potential: Gentle as puppy, affectionate toward everyone; does everything boy says — plus everything he doesn’t say…
Positively uncanny: As responsive to thoughts as to spoken commands.
Teacher promises to include Baloo in study as well.
Terry says, “How ’bout that.”
Everybody wears variety of hats these days: Gayle serves part-time as martial-arts instructor. Took me under wing immediately; and wasted no time getting after damage done by well-intentioned tampering: Together with continuing therapy directed at physiological restoration, most drills center on reintegrating lethal responses. Progress heartening: Strength, coordination, reflexes, speed returning; endurance building toward preinjury levels. Building rapidly — sparring with Master does bring out best in student.
Kim, Adam, Lisa numbered amongst students also. Gayle complimentary about progress to date; told them in front of whole class — and me — could tell had learned basics from true Master. Embarrassed me to death. Especially when all turned, applauded.
Hominems have predecessors’ mistakes clearly in mind; intend no repetition. Planning to restore, preserve planet; concentrate upon research, education, individual development, etc.
Approve of that; parallels own ambitions for organizing Wisconsin hometown community as people wandered in after reading leaflet I posted all across continent, had circumstances required fallback to contingency plan. (So glad didn’t!)
As for own plans… Well — are in considerable disarray at moment: Adam never party to forced cheerfulness during incapacitation. Eyes, on occasions when managed to focus both mine on him at once, were intent, watchful; reflected worry, strain — and Something Else (something new, gentle, confident; devoid of any hint of previous leer; patient, but conveying intentions every bit as direct, purposeful, unmistakable — and unexpectedly welcome!) which, detected in someone much older than 13, would be difficult to distinguish from way Daddy’s eyes always shone when looked at Momma. Meeting gaze makes me feel all quivery inside.
(Would have sworn [before all this happened] Adam too young for such depths [not to mention self!]. But — well, not so sure now… Both lots older [calendar years surely very minorest component].)
However, though find myself in substantial agreement — just not ready yet! At least, don’t think so. But not sure. And don’t know how to find out (short of empirical research).
Asked Teacher. But no help at all. No matter how I phrased question, merely smile
d benignly; expressed serene conviction that, whatever decision I make, will turn out for best.
And big sisters worse. Kim grins wickedly; Gayle smiles archly. Both profess to envy problem: Regard Adam, age difference notwithstanding, eminently catchable (for sport or long-term, singly or double-team!); only respect for my amusing, old-fashioned, all-or-nothing, provincial morality, coupled with recognition of implied prior claim, keeps them from taking run at him themselves.
Kidding, of course.
(I think.)
Fortunately, not facing deadline; Adam applying no pressure. Of course, forbearance clearly due to opinion that he doesn’t have to push; that quarry solidly hooked; that bringing matter to resolution only matter of time.
All of which quite frustrating — only thing more vexing than suspicion that everybody around you knows you better than you know yourself is ever-deepening conviction they’re right…!
Well, maybe are. But have to find out for self. Shall take advantage of Adam’s newfound maturity, patience: Continue present relationship (with addition of occasional CPR practice as medically indicated [cardiopulmonary system already shut down three times in only 11 years, after all — prudent person plans ahead]) until sure of own motivations, feelings.
Both still young; have all the time in the world to explore question. In whatever depth necessary.
Research promises to be interesting.
So does future.
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Emergence Page 35