Something warm is pooling on my chest. I move my hand to the spot and feel the sticky puddle on my shirt. I raise my hand, trying to catch the glow of the firelight, and I see something dark.
“More blood?”
Nathaniel’s eyes shift from my face, to my shirt, then to his arm. We see the wound on his arm at the same time. He lowers his hand back to the side of my neck.
“It’s nothing,” he says. His gray eyes are dark, but catch the flickering orange light from the bonfire. “You’re all that matters right now. I’ve almost stopped the bleeding completely.”
“Your arm. How?” I whisper and try to sit up. The sight of his blood dripping makes my stomach twist and heave worse than ever. In another second, I’m going to have to get off my back or risk choking on my own vomit. My diaphragm constricts and I pull my body forward. Pressure makes the cut on the side of my neck throb, but there’s nothing that can be done. I turn my head and a wave of yuck spills onto the ground.
“I’m sick,” I say as I try to catch my breath. “It’s the same as what Jared had.”
I hear my brother’s voice nearby and I strain to look for him. He’s sitting on a bench and some lady is looking at his shoulder or his upper chest where Star had cut him. In the half dark, he doesn’t look great, but I don’t think he’s going to die.
“You’re going to be fine, love.”
There’s a group of people near us and I hear, “The athame is now desecrated. No one touch it.”
I slant my gaze over to where they’re staring at the knife on the ground. My vision swims in the shadowed firelight, but I can hear clearly.
Someone else says, “Let the high priestess decide what to do with it.”
“It should never be used in the physical realm. This is bad for us all. She should go bury it immediately.”
“Vivi won’t want it on her property. I’m sure of that,” a man’s voice adds.
My stomach heaves again. Nathaniel supports me with his good arm and helps hold my hair back. After finishing round three, I collapse against him. He settles back and lays my head in his lap.
With eyes closed and barely able to speak, I whisper, “It’s the blade. It cut you. Is it like Travis’s dagger?”
“No, Jules. It does have magic in it, but this time it doesn’t hurt.”
“But you’re bleeding.” It takes all my effort to keep talking. I have to know if Nathaniel is injured because of me. The last time he was cut he said it burned like acid.
“It’s only draining my energy. I’m giving you what I can.”
“We’re both fading,” I say.
“I’m going to save you.”
“Stop healing me, Nathaniel. I’m not going to make it. You saw Harmony.”
“I can’t stop. It’s the same force that made you throw yourself in front of Jared. Why would you do that?” There’s agony in his voice. A desperation to understand the laws of nature which exist, but aren’t meant to be understood.
“He’s my brother.”
“And you’re my vixen. A gorgeous fox dressed as a woman and traveling between worlds.”
“I love your stories, Nathaniel. On the other side, will you tell me another one?”
“I’ll tell you every story I know, but never on the other side. You’re not going yet.”
“I’m not so sure. You didn’t see Jared in the hospital.”
“I’m staying with you, Juliana. I’m here with you always. Eternity never mattered to me until I knew you existed in this world. Now it haunts me. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to give it up and stay with you for just one more second.”
“I’ll never stop wanting you either,” I say.
“And I, you.”
“Take me to my family, Nathaniel. Please, before you go.”
“I’m not leaving you,” he says in denial.
“Your arm is fading. I can feel your energy loss.”
“You’re too damn sensitive, you know that?”
“It’s a curse.”
“It’s your beautiful curse.”
Nathaniel squeezes me tight. “Jared?” he calls over my head. “Juliana needs you now.”
We’re still cuddled on the ground. I’m tucked in next to him and feeling like I might just go find Harmony at any second. I think I have a fever and my body is aching like I’ve been beaten up on the inside.
I watch Jared slip away from the attending witches in front of him. There’s a large bandage taped over his wound and a blanket around his shoulders.
“Take my place,” Nathaniel says to Jared.
I hear a siren from far off. Jared sits down next to us and they shift me into Jared’s lap.
“I’ll be back, Juliana.” He kisses my tender lips and whispers, “I promise.”
Nathaniel’s magical warmth is gone. The light surrounding us dims like the bonfire went out even though its glow is the same. Nathaniel’s light is gone. The cool mountain air brushes against me like a thousand cold hands caressing my sensitive skin. I shiver next to Jared. He wraps up both in the blanket, but I still feel like I’m freezing without my angel boyfriend.
“Hantavirus,” I say as I close my eyes and let the black of the night sky fall down over me and invade my body and my mind. “Tell Grandma I have hantavirus.”
∞
I thought the angel, Harmony, would be the first thing I would see when I came to. Of course, I was hoping for Nathaniel, but hope is apparently an aloof stranger in my life. So, I was expecting Harmony with her fair skin, long blonde hair, and velvet cloak draped over her shoulders. Harmony is supposed to bring me to the afterlife. I have to admit I am curious as to what happens after we die, but I’m not ready. It was an accident for crying out loud. I didn’t take Jared’s illness into myself on purpose. And I didn’t throw myself in front of a magical blade to have my neck sliced open on purpose either. Doesn’t God, or heaven, or Great Spirit know this?
Something must have gone terribly wrong. An ashen-faced ghoul is hovering over me, waving his arms, and speaking a language other than English. I shrink away in an attempt to escape the monster. Death isn’t supposed to be horrific. Nathaniel told me we pass to a better place. Not a dark room filled with flickering lights and sad faces. I want out of here.
As soon as the thought is complete, I begin to move. Just like that. Like Nathaniel said. Think about moving and you’re doing it. Weightless and free from my body is a relief better than a cold drink after scaling a rock wall in the hot mountain sun for four hours. The sensation is better than flying and nearly indescribable.
Inside the strange room, I leave my body, but I’m not sure where I want to go. There’s a group of people surrounding me in the unfamiliar bed. The words being spoken are now clear to me. It’s only a man’s voice coming from under the ghoulish mask.
“The West is closed to you, young one. Choose not to enter. We ask the spirit guides to honor our request…”
I lose interest in his words as I notice Harmony standing a few feet back from the others. She looks right at me with a welcoming and genuine expression on her face. “Juliana? Are you ready?”
Before I answer a heavy weight is placed on my chest and I’m instantly back inside my body. There are warm hands holding my own. I feel the rush of breath as it enters my lungs.
The talking specter continues its chant except now I can’t understand him. The foreign language was clear when I was out of my body but is indiscernible inside my skin. Confusion muddles my thoughts and I open my eyes. This time I see Jared on my left and Grandma on my right. They’re holding my hands. My mom is sitting in a chair next to Grandma, but her forehead pressed into my side. I think she’s sobbing. I want to reach out to her, but I’m unable to move.
The ghostly apparition holds a charm against my chest. It feels heavier than it looks. It’s a small hoop of some kind like a large beaded bracelet with hair and feathers tied to it. It’s definitely keeping me locked inside. At least for the moment. The shadows on the walls flick
er and sway from burning candles inside the room. A scented fog permeates the air with sage and sweetgrass. My eyes begin to burn slightly from the pungent smoke.
“I can move that if you want,” Harmony says as she looks down at the talisman.
I’m not sure. I want to speak it aloud, but only the thought comes out. Harmony seems to hear me perfectly regardless.
“Juliana, you have chosen a difficult path. I am here to take you to your loved ones on the other side. Your family, here in this room, has decided they want you to stay with them. What would you like?”
My mind is suddenly blank. It should be an easy question to answer. I would have sworn I wanted to live, but now that I have to decide with a simple yes or no, I realize it’s not a simple answer. Will I be able to endure Jared’s passing? Can I survive the grief afterward? It will not only be mine. I will have to watch my mother and grandmother suffer from Jared’s loss as well. I will have school and work and a life that isn’t always easy. Being out of my body was the easiest thing I have ever felt. And what about Nathaniel…
If I die, can I be with Nathaniel?
“No, Juliana. He is unlike you. He has agreed to a contract as a guide.”
Could I sign one of these contracts?
“You know not what you ask. There is much involved with a position in the afterlife. Unconditional service brings its own challenges and rewards.”
I understand I’m under-informed, but I want to be with Nathaniel, Harmony, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.
“He yearns for you as well. It is a blessing to find your soul-mate at such a young age. The two of you face unique circumstances. Ones which may or may not lead to happiness.”
A chance. I just want a chance with him.
“I think you have made your decision.”
I take a moment to let her words sink in. Are you leaving me now?
“I am, Juliana Katherine Crowson. You have been granted a pass. Please do not take it lightly. It is very rare.” She bows her head ever so slightly and closes her eyes. She looks serene and peaceful, and I suspect she would look the same if I had chosen to go with her.
Harmony?
“Yes?”
Can Jared have a pass?
“No. He will fulfill his destiny.”
Just asking. I’m really going to miss him. I pause for a second considering the choice I just made. Thinking about Nathaniel made it easy, but there are other considerations. Can I get a pass from the visions I’ve been having? They’re not fun.
“You must accept who you are. Please do not worry. All will be well in the end, Juliana.”
The next thing I know I’m listening to a heart rate monitor beeping and the sound of a digital alarm of some kind. My mom sits up. Air is being forced into my lungs from some machine. I see the ghoul retrieve the charm and place it on my feet. It backs away and disappears as my mom blocks my line of sight. Tilting my head, I struggle to see if the being has an actual human body or not. I get a glimpse of canvas vest, shorts, and hiking boots. Chris saves the day once again. Then Mom is hugging me and I can’t see him at all. I want to hug her back, but all the needles and tubes taped into my hands and arms prevent me from moving very well. It’s hell being in a hospital bed. I can’t speak and can hardly move. My family looks as shocked as I feel. They’re crying and squeezing me. Someone turns the obnoxious fluorescent lights on and I seriously reconsider not taking that trip with Harmony. Turning my head to escape the worst of the intrusive glare, I see Marcus sitting on the window seat. I take it back. Discomfort be damned. I’m not ready yet.
Chapter Twenty-four: Loose Ends Tied
Nathaniel
I receive my final warning. It’s like a dream with only sound and no sight. In the vastness of space where I exist when I recover my depleted strength, I am told I have done enough. If I continue to assist Jared, even inadvertently, I will be transferred to the land where souls find peace. I will no longer be needed as an angel. I get to move on like all of my past clients. I will finally pass. With a humble nod of agreement, I refrain from speaking and make no argument. For there are no disputes on the other side. It is a simple matter of accepting what is to be and moving forward, and very rarely does anyone deny what the Universe gives them.
I’m surprisingly okay with these new terms. I’ve known since the first time I kept Jared alive, by saving him from falling out of the window at Castle Hill, that I had altered his fate. That there were going to be repercussions to my actions — for me and for Jared. Passing away wouldn’t be the end of me. It would only be the end of my current state of existence. No more cases, no more assisting the recently deceased. No more Juliana. Does the Almighty know that even as I acknowledge this new truth it only feeds the fire burning inside me to complete what I have started?
The unknown drives me. I must first finish with Liam. The bloody rotten situation is a festering boil. The fallen angel wizard is a crafty nut-case, but what’s done is done. I can’t take back the moment I stepped into the fairy lock and I can’t run away like a coward either. Liam knows the information I want and I’m willing to see this through. I will find out how I can come back to life so I can be with Jules. A real life without death always pulling me away.
The list of my obligations may be short, but the cost of what is at stake is incalculable.
First, I see to Vivi.
When I return to the ranch I’m pleased to find I can still enter the boundary of protection without having to be re-invited. The house is full, mostly with older women and men. Some of the faces look familiar from the gathering. Vivi’s surrounded by friends and appears well cared for in my absence.
I find her in bed looking better and worse than when I last saw her. Better because she’s no longer hacking and physically struggling against her illness, and worse because she’s lethargic and distant. She’s thinner and her eyes are a little dull. I ask to speak with her alone. She shoos her caretakers out of the room. Her voice is scratchy and weak. The women look concerned to leave her alone with me, but they step out.
I sit down in a chair someone has placed by the bed and take Vivi’s hand. For a few minutes, I just sit and be with her. Letting the room settle around us and channeling some warmth into her cool fingers and into her tired body. A fountain gurgles in a corner and one of the witches, or maybe a few of them, have been revitalizing the plants. The vines are lush and flowering, with white blooms filling the room with their perfume.
“Scotch, my boy,” she rasps.
“Would your doctors approve?”
“Who gives a load of toads about what my doctor has to say?”
“I might. Especially if it’s contraindicated with your medicine.”
“I’m probably due for a dose of that poison they’re giving me, so I’d like to wash it down with my favorite liquid libation.”
“Give me a minute and I’ll see what I can do for you.”
When I return with her pills and a tumbler of Scotch she gives me a pleased look and a glimpse of the Vivi I’m used to. A little of her spitfire is showing.
“My niece, Star, is doing much better after the other night,” she says.
“Oh,” I say unimpressed, but trying not to sound rude.
“Her parents are taking care of her, and she’s back on the medication for her manic depression.”
I shudder at the thought of Star. The girl almost succeeded in killing Jules, and Jared. Now isn’t the time for her. I made my list of priorities and I don’t want to get distracted from it. “Are you sure you want to talk about her right now?”
“Not really. I feel like road kill.”
“Well, you kind of look like it, too.”
“Hey, you watch yourself, young man,” she says, but I can tell she likes the banter and it’s helping her find her spirit.
“Thought we were close enough to appreciate the honesty.”
“Right you are. So what in the devil are you doing back here? Go harass some other unfortunate.”
&n
bsp; She wheezes and I watch as she suppresses something from the depths of her lungs. She sips her drink, then rests against the pile of pillows behind her.
“I had to check on you.”
“You did not. Didn’t you see the room full of well-wishers and fusspots? They’re enough to drive me stark raving.”
“How are you really, Vivi? What is your doctor saying? And why didn’t they admit you?”
“Pish-posh.” She waves a hand through the air.
I give her a deadly serious look that says I won’t be ignored.
“It’s the same old song and dance. Take this poison and let us stick you with our needles. What they don’t understand is it’s my heart that’s sick and no bottle of pills is going to fix it.”
“What can we do to fix you then?”
“It’s too late for me, Nathaniel. My bed is made. I’ve wronged and I know it. Now you tell me everything about your pretty girlfriend. Is she recovered? I missed half of what happened the other night, damn this body. Now I expect a full report.”
“Vivi…,” I start to reprimand her for changing the subject again. I should know better. She doesn’t let me get any farther than her name.
“Don’t ‘Vivi’ me,” she scolds. “Your life is the only interesting thing happening around here. If it weren’t for your exploits, I’d already be long gone.”
“Don’t say that. Your life has more meaning than mine.”
“Hardly,” she huffs into her glass.
“It does,” I argue back. “You, my dear, still have one. I’m only a ghost pretending.”
“Well, your pretend life is far more interesting. So tell me what’s up or you can leave me to my prescribed bed rest. Doctor’s orders, mister. Stay and spill the beans or leave me be. I’d like to die in peace and quiet.”
She closes her stubborn green eyes and lays her head back, already pretending to ignore me. I sigh. She’s not going to cooperate and tell me anything else about how sick she really is. But if I’m still here she must have alternative plans involving her suicide.
“I haven’t seen Juliana yet.”
“That’s preposterous,” she says without opening her eyes.
Haunting Me (An Angel Falls Book 3) Page 27